Hiii dear fans :3 Yeah, chapter 15! I've gotten so much inspiration from the song you'll find in this chapter. I wrote it in one day !
I'd like to thank you all for all the reviews, it really means a lot to me.
Ehhh, I'm really not good at that kind of things, uh ?
Anyway, I won't let you wait further. Oh yeah, one last thing; the name of the song is called Bad girl from Wale and Rihanna (Yeah, I could have put it in the end of the chapter, but I'm lazy.)
Enjoy, and review :3
''... That's why you people should never say that in front of a Taliban,'' laughed our English teacher.
I tried to listen as Ms. Karima flew away from the original lesson to tell us one of her stories from when she was younger, but I wasn't able to. My whole spirit was concentrated on only one thing: Helga. I was only thinking about Helga.
She... Never came to work since she sang at Harold's. My friends kept asking me news about Helga, and I told them she was doing fine, but I had no idea of how she was. I haven't got to see her. I went to her apartment a couple of times, but she was not there. There was not a single sign of her anywhere I looked at.
And stress was eating me. My notes were falling down, and Helga was nowhere to be found. I was worried sick. She had not shown herself to work, so how the heck did she managed to live without money?
I gritted my teeth at the idea of her robbing or worse; having sex with dudes. Stinky seemed to notice my state because he leaned slightly towards me.
''I reckon Arnold that you look away. What's wrong?'' He said, his southern accent disappearing as the years went on.
''Nothing Stinky...''
''Is it Helga again?''
I sighed. Was I that much of an open book?
''Yeah... I've gotten no news from her in a while. I'm so worried.''
''I'm sure she is okay. Don't you worry about it,'' said the very tall man with a confident blink before listening to the teacher who decided to explain how well her vacation went in Cuba.
Geez, like we care.
...
I let a dark smoke blow off from my mouth, looking into the ground with a thoughtful look on my face. Thanks to Helga, I smoked now. I've been so worried sick for her; cigarettes helped me to calm down. I told Gerald about it, and he only shook his head in defeat.
''I didn't know you smoked.''
I lifted my head. I knew that voice. I stared right into the emerald green eyes I used to admire ever so much. Despite me, a weak smile came across my face.
''Hey, Lila. So how's Phoebe's place treating you?''
The beautiful woman came closer to me with this just so feline way to walk. She looked a little better that the last time I saw her.
''Smoking's not good, Arnold. You know that.''
I stared for a minute at the long stick of nicotine in my fingers and rubbed the back of my neck. We were still at school, and I wanted my break to be calm and relaxed.
''Yeah, I know...''
''It's her, isn't it?''
I could feel a little anger in her voice, but she remained calm and quiet. My smile lowered a little as I took another drag.
''I don't think it's your business anymore Lila.'' I said quietly, without any aggression.
''It will always be.''
She leaned on my side, and the silence came back in force again. I took one, two, three other drags from my long nicotine stick before throwing it on the ground. It was so relaxing, even if the taste itself was horrible. After few minutes, I spun to see her looking at me with wet eyes. Here we go again. I walked towards her and patted her back.
''Don't you cry, Lila. I don't like that.''
''Come back to me...'' She muttered half-unconsciously.
I sighed in defeat, my eyes staring merely at the asphalt.
''I can't, Lila. I... I don't love you anymore. But despite what you think, I still care for you.''
''If you care for me then leave her. She has too much influence for you. First cigarettes, and then drugs, and...'' She spoke, her wonderful green eyes looking away from me.
''I love her. There's nothing you can do about it. I know this girl is trouble, and to be honest, she drives me crazy, but... I just can't give up on her.''
Her back slipped against the wall until she was sitting on the ground, her arms resting on her knees.
''I'm oh too certain that you never said that to me...''
''Because you were a good girl, I guess. Always kind, helpful, generous... Perfect,'' I muttered slowly, more for myself.
''I thought you liked it...''
''I thought so too. ''
Her head dropped, and my heart sank into my stomach. I fell on my knees, and resisted to the urge to take her in my arms.
''Listen to me Lila. I'm... I didn't mean to hurt you. It's just... I mean, I thought of breaking up way before Helga show up. I passed... Incredible years with you. I won't deny it. But... We're just too different and -...
''I don't think we're that different, Arnold.''
''We are, Lila. Don't deny it. We changed so much since our senior year. The same old routine, the same nights spent watching movies... It was cool back then, but I need more.''
''Then why did you not tell me this!'' She frowned a little, and her pug nose breathing harshly.
''I told you many times Lila. Many times! But you weren't even listening!''
This conversation was going nowhere. I ran my left hand in my hair, trying to find a way out.
''Lila. You should move on. We've been together so long. A new guy, a new relationship would be just right for you. You are an incredible girl, you deserve better.''
''But I don't want another man! I want you!'' She yelled softly, tears threatening to fall like a Saturday night rain.
''Pardon me Lila.'' I murmured as I headed for my class.
I could see her fall on her knees and cry. My heart was hurting me so hard. I hated doing this to her... But I didn't want to spend my life with her just to make her happy. I wanted
To be with Helga. She needed me, even if she didn't think so.
Right after school, Sid asked me to go to cinema with him and Harold, but I just headed home. My new home, actually. Geez, it was pretty boring since I have no TV left. I tried again to call Helga, for what would be the 100th time this week, but no answer. I bit the bottom of my lips. In what kind of troubles was she in now? I hope... I hope the dealer guy – forgot his name – hadn't killed her. My heart froze at this though, and stung. All I had to do was waiting until I reach her.
But it was easier said than done.
...
The weekend came slowly. I spent the whole weekend in my new apartment, reading books, watching movies, playing on my computer, everything to keep me from thinking of her.
It was raining hard outside, and the cold was slowly taking its place in the air of Hillwood. I rested my head in my hand, watching out the windows as the plip-plop of the rain broke the usual silence.
''I hope she has an umbrella...'' I muttered to myself.
I peeked on my watch. 8:30 PM. I went thoughtful for a moment before walking out of the kitchen and heading for my bedroom. I installed myself on the chair near the computer and started to type something. I took a slurp of my coca, my eyes staring hard at the computer. And half-consciously, almost by instinct, I put on the CD I now owned and listened carefully to her songs, trying to find some sadness, loneliness in her voice. But there was nothing. She liked her life... Or maybe that was all she ever knew.
I sighed. I was not able to concentrate. I should go to her place once again. Maybe she will be there. I bit my lips, thinking the pros and cons. I finally decided to do so and I grabbed my brown coat and walked out.
The cold wind sent me chills down my back, and I shivered hard. My hair dropped and was brushed back by the rain, my old blue hat still on the top of my football shaped head.
Hey, Football head!
I frowned. Helga... Where the heck are you?
The streets were all but crowded. And she was nowhere to be found. I began to run. I had a bad feeling. But as I expected, she was not at her place. The door was still broken, and couldn't close well. My heart stung. What could have happened? Gosh, I would hate myself if something happened to her without me to protect her.
But much of my surprise, when I passed near a hallway, I didn't found Helga, but her little gang. Burn was smoking, and Jawbreaker was sitting on the ground, his dark looking skin making him almost invisible in the night. Gino was on the phone, speaking something like Spanish, or Italian, and yelling. The two girls were talking, one of them smoking a single cigarette. T-rex just finished a bottle of Jack Daniels and seemed all beaten up. Karl was already high and was staring at the nothingness in silence.
''Guys!'' I called them.
''Hey, that's the guy... Uh... Alfred ?'' Pinky tried to say, narrowing her black eyes.
'' Arnold. Have you seen Helga? I can't find her anywhere for weeks!'' I panicked.
''Calm down, Blondie. She is okay; she has been pretty busy with some... things. She needed to get money faster than having a real job, she can't do that. She's our boss after all.'' Said Millow taking a drag and throwing the smoke away from her mouth.
''Where is she?'' I asked again, not really wanting to know what kind of things.
''She's busy with the dealer who is after her. She's trying to deal things.''
My whole being exploded.
''What! But he will kill her!'' I growled in total panic.
Burn shoved me a little, his brown eyes bloodshot.
''Fuck off, Shortman. Get off, you're stressing for nothing. She's going to be okay. She's always okay, she's Helga Pataki. She went through more than you could imagine.''
I was speechless! And you call it friends! She maybe Helga Pataki, but she is also a girl! A single girl!
''Aren't you going to do something?'' I spat angrily, not wanting to believe it.
''Nothing's going to happen.''
''How can you tell?''
Jawbreaker spat on the floor and came to me, his large and huge silhouette overpowering me totally.
''Look man, you're somewhat in the trust of Helga, so I don't want to hurt you. But don't abuse of your luck.
''What the hell is happening here?''
All turned their head to see Helga at the end of the hallway. She was wearing a dark hoodie and dark blue jeans. But what stunned me the most was the shining, threatening gun she was holding in her hand. I got wordless.
''Hey Helga, so?'' Asked Millow as Gino suddenly hung up from his call to look at her.
She sighed, looking tired.
''The deal was pretty rough. I used my way to calm things.'' She explained.
And then I noticed her hoodie was half unzipped, and that her belt was not settled. My eyes opened wide.
''YOU SLEPT WITH HIM?'' I yelled.
All my concern, all my worry, all my anger. I was evacuating it all. I couldn't keep it all for myself anymore.
She frowned, suddenly noticing me.
''What are you doing here? Geez, I need a ciga-...
She was about to take one in her pocket but I suddenly grabbed her wrist.
''You little...'' Began T-rex but Helga looked up at them.
''Leave.''
''But Helga..." Tried Pinky.
''I want everybody to leave! Am I making myself clear? Crimeny !''
Her friends stared a moment at us and finally walked away, Jawbreaker holding a high Karl. We went silent a moment before she took back her wrist and grabbed aggressively my shirt. My anger came back in force.
''Listen to me, Arnold, I...''
''Why, Helga? Why are you doing this to yourself? You're not a... You're not that kind of girl.
I lowered my head, and threw myself away from her grip. I turned, not wanting to see her face.
''You deceive me so much. I gave you the opportunity to have a job, a normal job, to keep you from doing these things... And here you are, sleeping with the guy who beat you up few weeks ago... I... Just don't understand.'
I was so calm, and yet, I've never been that mad before. My fist were clenched so hard, it hurt me.
She didn't reply, she just... contemplated me. Wordless. Her gun was still in her hand. But I didn't fear it. I had enough of this bullshit.
''I love you, Helga. Why are you doing this to me? It's so unfair. You're hurting yourself, you're hurting me. I thought we were friends. Where's my place in your heart? Tell me.'' I asked with despair, finally looking at her.
Her eye was cold, lifeless. Her golden locks were stuck on the top of the head, and shoulders. Her face was stern, and her body motionless. After few seconds, she pulled her gun back in her pocket and gazed at me. Her eye was bloodshot.
''Who told you I had a place in my heart for you?'' She responded as cold as she could before turning back to walk in the darkness of the night.
No. No, I won't let her go again. Not this time, damn it! I grabbed her wrist and hold it as tightly as I could before throwing my wet lips on hers. I could fell some reluctance, and she tried to push me, but I wrapped my arms around her waist and neck. Gosh, I missed these lips just ever so much. The taste of her lips, the curves of her body against mine. Our noses rubbing softly. It was the first time I kissed her first, and I enjoyed every second of her surprise.
But after what seemed to be like an eternity, she kissed me back. She kissed me back! And with a passion I hadn't gotten to see before. She rolled up her arms around my neck, and rubbed her breast against my torso. A hot wind began to storm in my abdomen, and felt a desire I no longer felt for Lila anymore. I broke the kiss for air, but she took my lips right away. We began to walk awkwardly, between two kisses, to her apartment, and then her bedroom. We were only 10-15 meters from her place, but it seemed to me like it was 50 kilometers. I pushed the door of her room, and she pushed me with force on the bed. My back met the grayish sheet of her bed as she turned on the radio.
I widened when I recognized the voice of the singer but before I could think further she threw herself on me to kiss me fiercely...
Is it bad that I never made love, no I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
I'll be your bad girl, I'll prove it to you
I can't promise that I'll be good to you
Her voice was echoing in the whole bedroom. So soft. So beautiful. So erotic. It was like the song has been made only for us, for this moment.
I touched her cheek. Our skin was wet from the iced rain, but somehow, I liked it more. Her golden bangs were resting on her skin, on mine. The water flowing from it was humecting my shirt. Our breath was uncontrolled, almost inexistent. It was only us, only the desire.
Cause I had some issues, I won't commit
No, not having it
But at least I can admit that I'll be bad no to you
Yeah, I'll be good in bed, but I'll be bad to you
Bad that I never made love, no I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
She made a little move of her head to make her hair fly on the other shoulder. Her blue ocean eye was looking right into my soul, and I couldn't help but blush. At this point, I didn't think twice at what I was doing. I wanted it, and I could tell she wanted it too.
She lowered to kiss me one more time as her hand found their way under my shirt. I shivered against the cold skin. But my body was hot, so hot, just so hot. It felt like I was burning inside, but shivering from the cold from outside. It was intense. None of us shared a word as we began to undress, with the song scattering freely in the room.
Hold up - bad girls ain't no good
And the good girls ain't no fun
Look (and the bad girls want a real nigga)
Yeah, cause real niggas just want
So it seems that we caught up in the wrong thing
This time, she was singing with another man, a black one by the tone of his voice. They were singing together, her voice fit so well. This song was turning me on like hell. I took a deep breath, trying to stay conscious, and not being enveloped by the sudden strong desire. I tried to be on the top, but she kept me from doing this, wanting to be the dominative one at any moment.
Got a thing for a queen who don't wanna leave
You got a (thing for a king, but you ain't a king)
Seems like the ones who wrong never got a ring
And I can see that you're (venom to you)
In the literal sense, I mean the physical sense
I mean the, oops, wait, let me give me a second
I need a minute to vent, I'm only telling you that
I heard you (bad girl)
And I'm tellin' you I could believe that
Not the type of fella to yell or be gettin' jealous
But we talkin' 'bout game, Wale got the league pass
We at that bed, floor, couch, hold up
(Loud pack boy, roll up)
You know what's up? (Wassup?)
Forget it
'Cause you know the bad girls always unapologetic
The lyrics seemed to be brought from my heart. So true, so real. So real, it was almost unreal. Here I am, saying dumb things when I have this twisted beauty right on me, staring at my bare torso, gently scratching off my skin with her nails. It felt just so good. Just so right.
I kissed her again and again, my fingers caressing with all my love the bare skin of her shoulder. She was now only in black bra and panties. She was so beautiful. So hot. I felt myself melt from the desire. Every touch I got the feeling that we belonged to each other.
Is it bad that I never made love, no I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
I'll be your bad girl, I'll prove it to you
I can't promise that I'll be good to you
Cause I had some issues, I won't commit
No, not having it
But at least I can admit that I'll be bad no to you
Yeah, I'll be good in bed, but I'll be bad to you
Bad that I never made love, no I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
My anger was forgotten. I loved her with all my being, with all my soul, my body. I wanted to make love to her so badly, it hurt. I loved a bad girl. She was my bad girl, my nasty mouth, my play-toy... No, she was just my love. The girl I would protect and love forever, no matter how bad she was. No matter how imperfect she was. How dangerous, mean and aggressive she was.
She hurt feelings, she ain't wrong
She work hard, she play harder
Got a smart mouth, like a...
She don't catch feelings she too busy catching G5
She no saint, 'cept samurai
Gon blaze up, take the wheel Jah
And Helga got these women in they...
I'm just tryin' to take a dip ya
Never did terrible bullshit ya
Enough with concerns, she try and live it up
Our breath mixed, our mouth locked to each other. I was eating her mouth, wrapping my arms around her, afraid she could leave. She loved to drive me crazy, her now bare breast resting on me, her legs teasing mine, her eyes full of desire.
Our bodies were close, so close. I could see the sweat on her white skin. It was like the heat of the room has suddenly increased. I stared at her so wonderful blue eyes. This eye I fell in love with. Slowly, my hand made her way to her cheek, and lifted. Still slowly, I removed the bangs from her right eye. She didn't move, breathing in and out, like in trance. She was okay with that, so I discovered what she was hiding under her hairs.
I gasped. And felt anger growing in me. Her other eye was almost exactly like the other one, but the difference was that it was all white, and a big scar ran across her eye. Like those in movies. Shocked, I caressed the wounded skin, and looked at her. Her face was serious, but still full of passion. We continued.
No more sucker for love, she probably duck it because
You try to follow your gut feeling you get lost
(Cause I've had some issues) Yeah and I noticed it
You got the coldest corazon, but warmer skin
You froze with it, you try and play Sub Zero I be Scorpion
Get over here today
Smellin' like Jean Paul, got the ye
Got about three friends, she don't even tweet them
Ain't no IG, but she follow K
Got that bed, floor, couch, hold up
(Loud pack boy, roll up)
You know what's up? (Wassup?)
Forget it, cause you know the bad girls always unapologetic
It was so weird. Looking at my love, her two eyes admiring me, my whole nude body. She sat on me, and smirked slightly. She was... There was no word to describe her beauty. She had the most amazing body I've never seen despite her tattoos and piercings. It just made her look more stunning.
Is it bad that I never made love, no I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
I'll be your bad girl, I'll prove it to you
I can't promise that I'll be good to you
Cause I had some issues, I won't commit
No, not having it
But at least I can admit that I'll be bad no to you
Yeah, I'll be good in bed, but I'll be bad to you
Bad that I never made love, no I never did it
But I sure know how to fuck
She sang the refrain in my ear. It seemed to me that the time froze; there was only her and me on this planet. I couldn't wait more, I couldn't take it anymore. I'll help her and if I can't, I want to be with her.
We will make it together.