Wednesday came and went. Mali was enjoying weapons training more and more—Officer Sadna told her she had a flare for the art. Wednesday night the boys decided to go on another cafeteria run and this time the girls went with them. They had come back with the spoils of the raid and played board games late into the night around the kitchen table. Thursday classes were uneventful. Battlefield Medicine tuned out to be as awesome as Mali had hoped, and the teacher, Nathan Peck, added to the fun. He was a small and spry man, but bursting with fun, energy, and a desire to teach. Mali found that his class was easily in her top favorites.
Military History went on without a hitch, although between Liara and Mali things were still uncomfortable and tense. Despite herself, Mali did find the topic interesting, and although Liara's lectures weren't adrenaline packed, they were knowledgeable and dynamic. Mali found that she liked to hear about the past, and often, during the lectures, would find herself imagining fighting in the battles that Liara described. At dinner that night the squad chose to eat in the cafeteria with Mali instead of at the house, and they could see that she was dreading her class with Finch. "I haven't figured it out yet!" Mali complained with her brow furrowed. "Imagine her face when I show up no closer to discovering it then on Tuesday."
"I feel for you man," Audin shook his head, "facing up to Finch's wrath—no way. I wouldn't do it for ten thousand credits."
"I wouldn't do it for a million!" Charlie piped up from the end of the table.
"Please guys, you're not helping." Ara said with glares for both of them.
"Well, there's no avoiding it." Mali stood up and dropped her plate in a waste bin. "Wish me luck."
"Good luck." They all said and Mali raised an iconic eyebrow.
"That was rhetorical." She rolled her eyes playfully before leaving. As Mali moved on dread started to fill her. She stepped out of the dining hall into the cool night air and looked up at the stars. Mali wished that she could be among them, twinkling in the heavens. She certainly didn't wish that she was on her way right now to get a tongue lashing from Finch.
"Hey Mali!" She stopped and turned to see Commander Shepard trotting toward her. "Hey, sorry," he said, coming up to her, "but I going to catch you after dinner, but then I saw you leave and, well…ya' know."
"Yah." Mali smiled, "so what do you want?"
"Well I was going to talk to you about it in class today, but there was all the rest of the kids around and personally, you always look like a storm cloud right after Liara's class, so for self-preservation, I kinda like to stay away."
"Yah sorry. We just have problems. Besides, it's a good thing. I'm lucky to have a class right after hers where I get to punch people and get my anger out in a healthy way." Shepard raised an eyebrow.
"I don't think that beating up your fellow students when you're angry is exactly a healthy way to get your anger out."
"Well, how else should I release it? She just frustrates me."
"I'm sorry. Dickens told me you guys had a falling out." Mali stayed silent, Shepard stood there quietly, waiting. He looked at her knowingly, prodding her—Mali did not take the bait.
"Did you want something? Or did you just want to talk?" Mali asked finally. Shepard smiled sadly at her.
"Being alone can hurt Mali. I'm just trying to—"
"We're done with that. What did you want?"
"Fine, but I'm only trying to help. I was wondering if you could stay after in my class on Tuesday, we could eat dinner in the gym. I wanted to talk to you about the reaper." Mali was taken by surprise, it was not what she had expected.
"What for? Has is come back?"
"No, but other things have been happening—and in my opinion, people are not taking this as seriously as I think they should. Right now there should be mass evacuations from likely-target planets, there should be preparations for war, we should be engaging it in battle, but nothing's happening. Since you've had the most dealings with it, and since I think it's after you—me and you should talk." Mali thought about it for a second.
"I think you're right. When the reaper wars were going on before, I was only little, but I do remember them. New Chicago wasn't hit by one of them, but because of that thousands of refugees would come pouring in everyday with new horror stories to share. What the reapers did to people—terrible."
"We called it harvesting." Shepard said. Mali shivered with disgust. They both stood there silently.
"I'll come," Mali finally answered, "I never want that to happen to people again if I can help it."
"Ok, good." Mali turned to go, but after a thought she turned back.
"Commander Shepard?" He turned back too.
"It's just Shepard—no need to be formal here."
"What did Dickens tell you?" Mali said it in a slightly hesitant voice.
"About Liara and you?" Mali nodded. "I thought we were done with the subject?" He said cynically. Mali shook her head.
"Forget it, I was—"
"No, No. Its ok, I have this annoying habit of just being well—me at the worst of times. I'm a bit of a jokester, something that my crew found annoying sometimes." Mali laughed a little.
"Same problem here." They both smiled a little.
"Well," Shepard started, looking over Mali's shoulder, "I would tell you right now, but I see Abbara's silhouette over there, and it doesn't look happy." Mali craned her neck and saw Finch's severe bun sticking out of the top of her head.
"Oh." Mali said. She turned back disappointedly to the officer.
"Well, how 'bout this? I'll tell you when you come Tuesday?"
"That 'be good." Mali said. "See ya." She waved and started away.
"See ya." Shepard chuckled to himself and turned back into the lobby of the dining area. Mali trotted up and away from the areas, taking deep breaths of fresh air. She trotted up to Abbara, who sneered in disgust.
"You're late. Despite what you may think this is an official class."
"I'm sorry, it was Shep—"
"Detention! This Sat—"
"Already have it—"
"Then next Saturday!" Mali groaned exasperatedly.
"What is it with you?! Why do you hate me?!"
"Double Detention! Now get inside!" Mali marched past her, fuming. What was it with people? No one ever gave her a chance, no one cared. Coming here was just a waste of time. Mali stalked into the center of room one and stood waiting for Finch. She came in and smoothed the front of her wrinkleless bland shirt and adjusted her slightly askew glasses. "Now, have you figured out your mnemonic?" Mali sighed, here it goes.
"No. I tried ever—"
"Then you are wasting both mine and your time! However, I can't say that I'm surprised by your negligence." Mali just gaped, a few frustrated tears leaked out and spilled onto her cheeks. "I think a bit of running might motivate you. To the edge of the campus and back, I expect you back in two hours for more training." Mali just stared at her in shock—this woman was crazy!
"What?"
"You heard me, time is ticking away."
"But I just ate!"
"Then all the more reason to run—burn some calories!" Mali's eyes hardened into slits, she would not crumble.
"Have it your way." She jogged out of the room and out into the night. Mali found a path that led from the square in the general direction she wanted and started off. She evened her breaths and poured on the speed—she would be back in less than hour and a half just to prove Finch wrong. It was ten miles round trip, five to the edge, and five back. It would be a long haul but Mali's anger burned inside her and made things easier. As she ran Mali could not help but notice the beauty of the place at night. Mali regretted her earlier thought—it had not been a mistake to come. The mistake was that she had been saddled with the worst teacher in the history of teaching. What is her deal anyway? Mali thought. She knew that Finch was a hard teacher, but these extremes were uncalled for. For the millionth time Mali wished that Yane was here with her.
He would have enjoyed the fields, Mali thought. The openness and the clear skies, it would have made him feel free. Her shadow bounced along as she continued, her legs flashing under the starlight. Most of the path sloped slightly downhill, so it was easy going. The trick, she found, was to keep her breathing even and her arms low. No longer than forty minutes later Mali could see the lights of the campus edge. Guards were on patrol with dogs, there were little outposts every hundred yards or so. As Mali came closer the guards on duty gave her curious looks. With a start, Mali realized that one of them was Clint. He had an assault rifle cradled in his arms. "Hey!" She gasped as she trotted up.
"What on earth are you doing?" Clint asked.
"Is this where they reassigned you?" Mali asked.
"Well obviously. Actually this was my actual job until I was reassigned to you." Mali smiled tiredly.
"Point taken."
"Now what's the deal?" The other guards looked on curiously.
"I didn't do my homework, and I was also late so I'm being punished."
"By running to the campus edge? That's five miles!"
"And back." Mali finished. Clint shook his head.
"I'm sorry." He apologized.
"It's my fault, I guess I deserve it." Mali said half-heartedly. "Well, I have to get back."
"Before you go, you want some water?" He handed her a canteen from his hip. Mali took a huge gulp and wiped her mouth, handing it back.
"Thanks, you don't know how good that tasted."
"Well, best of luck to yah. It was nice seeing you." He smiled.
"Surprisingly, it was." Mali smiled back, "I mean, all things considered."
"Get out'a here!" He laughed. "And don't come back till you've learned some respect." Mali mock saluted and trotted off.
"Aye, aye." Laughter followed her as she left and Mali smiled despite the long run ahead. About halfway back a sick feeling started growing in her stomach, growing with each stride. Mali's throat had been rubbed raw by the frigid air as she sucked it in and out. Her legs and arms burned and her abdomen was clenched tightly, trying to hold down the sickness. Sweat soaked her body and hair and it continually dropped off as she ran. Mali kept running. In the distance she could start to see the lights.
Her heart was pounding ferociously, but Mali pushed it harder, desperate to get back. She pumped her arms and legs as fast as they could go. Bile rose in her throat but she pushed it down. Only one mile remained when something snapped in her leg. With a cry of pain Mali fell to the ground and clutched her calf. Of its own accord it was clenching in and out, spaseming uncontrollably. Hot pain lanced up and down her leg. As far as she could tell, nothing had been torn, but her leg had just given out. Mali waited a minute for the pain to subside a little, and then she got back to her feet. She winced as she calf was stretched, a spike of pain stabbed in her calf. Mali hobbled on, keeping her eyes on the glowing lights. By far this was the worst run she had ever done, she thought. Half hopping half jogging Mali limped into town. She hadn't made it halfway across the square before another powerful burst of sickness lurched her stomach. Mali groaned, she knew she couldn't keep it in much longer.
She lunged for the fountain just as it rose for the last time, and Mali retched into the fountain, bending over the rim. She coughed up the last bits and spat them out, the nasty aftertaste cloying her mouth. She collapsed onto the ground, thoroughly exhausted, her back against the rim. She closed her eyes; her chest rose and fell quickly. Mali tried her best to calm her shaking. Her body had just been through a testing ordeal, and her nerves were shaken. With shaking limbs Mali pulled herself up and back onto her feet, and tottering, made her way toward building one. She looked like a zombie, haggard face, stringy hair, and a pail complexion with a green tinge. She tried to keep a straight line but tottered two and fro. "Mali?" A concerned voice echoed. Mali looked to her right and blearily squinted, making out a fuzzy blue blob that was stepping out of building three. The blob approached cautiously and walked alongside Mali as she kept making her way forward, "Why do you look like that, are you feeling ok?" Mali recognized Liara's voice. Of course it has to be her that sees me in this weakened state, Mali thought.
"Why are you talking to me?" Mali asked quietly as they continued on. Liara looked taken aback.
"Because, I came out here and I saw a sick little girl tottering about like she didn't know up from down, that's why."
"Well, I'm fine." Mali said, just as her stomach gave another heave. Mali scrambled to a garbage can close by and heaved into it.
"Yes I can see that." Liara said sardonically. Mali pushed herself up and continued on, "Mali, can you just please stop for a sec? It's obvious you need to sit down."
"Can't—biotics practice."
"Shouldn't it have ended a while ago?" Liara asked quizzically. Mali turned and looked at her with frowning eyes.
"That doesn't mean anything for Professor Finch." Liara persisted and continued with Mali, much to her annoyance. In her sick condition Mali couldn't out-walk her and so resigned herself to simmering silence.
"Is she the one making you sick? Is she training you to hard? I could talk to her if you—"
"What did you expect?!" Mali exclaimed, "You knew that we'd tear each other to pieces. No, don't!" Mali held up her hand to stop Liara from speaking. "You did—and I don't have time for this. She's expecting me back." Mali turned and stumbled forward, dizzy. Liara caught Mali by the elbow, but when she righted her Mali pushed her away. "I can do it myself." Mali mumbled angrily and started up the stairs to building one.
"Really Mali—"Liara sighed exasperatedly, rolling her eyes, "there is no need—"
"Goodbye, Professor T'soni." Mali said, and pushed through the doors. Outside, Liara steamed at the ears. She was stupid, so stupid for what she had done between them. She was the one who had pushed Mali away, she was the one who hadn't wanted to talk, yet she found that she couldn't stay away—it was like there was a rope connecting them together. Liara sighed and shook her head, whatever she wanted now didn't matter because she had chased Mali away. She went to leave, and then stopped. If she left she would miss this chance, but if she stayed, then maybe…
"I'm back." Mali stated as she walked into room one.
"How was your run?" Finch asked smugly.
"Fine." Mali did not give her the pleasure of knowing just how hard it had been. "If I'm not mistaken, it's only been an hour and forty-five, beating the two hour limit."
"Well, next time I'll make the time limit shorter. But don't be too proud, brains are more important than brawn." Finch crossed her arms. Mali's eyebrows shot up.
"Next time?"
"I'm sure you will forget to do your homework again, and when you do, the punishment will be the same. Let that knowledge motivate you to do better." Mali didn't argue, if she did she would be fighting a losing battle. "Well, there really isn't much else to do since you haven't discovered your mnemonic yet. Find it for Saturday. You are dismissed." Mali nodded and grabbed her duffle from a locker which held her training staffs. She had left it in here before dinner knowing she would be back to pick it up. Slowly and painfully she made her way outside and down the steps, so tired she didn't even notice the blue asari leaning against the wall beside the door. Liara cleared her throat to make her presence known. Half-way down the steps Mali turned and looked back up with bleary eyes.
"What do you want now Ms.—Oh." She looked surprised that Liara was standing there. "What are you still doing here?" She asked. Liara uncrossed her arms and pushed herself off the wall.
"Since you look so bad, I'm going to walk you home."
"I've been in tighter spots than this," Mali scoffed, "I don't need your help."
"Did I say anything about helping you? I'm just making sure you get home—think about the last time I let you wander about—you almost died."
"If you look at it all around—your intention—the fact that the act itself is helpful means that technically you are." Mali argued. Liara rolled her eyes.
"You want to argue all day?! You can get home, or we can bicker on the steps until morning."
"Fine." Mali answered, "But don't slow me down." Liara looked at her critically and chuckled.
"In your condition, I will be surprised if we make it there at all." Mali gave her a weathering look at finished descending the stairs.
I
"So, why are you sick?" Liara asked as they walked.
"I was running." Mali said. Liara scanned her eyes over Mali's wiry body and frowned. Mali caught her glance and bristled under it. "I've lost a lot of muscle mass since I left Earth ok?" Liara smiled a little.
"Even so, why would a little bit of running make you sick?"
"When you run ten miles, it tends to make anyone sick." Mali retorted.
"Oh, I see." Liara did not go further but Mali could feel her curiosity emanating from her.
"Aren't you going to ask why I ran ten miles?" Mali asked.
"Nope, it's between you and Professor Finch. It is not for me to interfere." Mali gave her an incredulous look.
"Who said anything about interfering? Besides, I wouldn't want you fighting my battles anyway; I can deal with them myself. However, if you want to know, it was because I didn't do my homework." A startled grunt sounded from Liara's throat—kind of a cross between a cough and a squeak.
"She made you run ten miles because you didn't do homework?"
"That's what I just told you." Mali walked on, irritably. "And I'm not a bad student, she just sets impossible standards." Liara looked pointedly down at Mali. Mali amended her statement "well, besides hers and yours classes I'm not."
"What's the deal with my class? Why don't you read the chapters? Are you trying to be rebellious?" Startled, Mali laughed out loud.
"Well, you really get down to it don't you?" She squeezed out. Liara was startled, and a little offended.
"Well…I've been reading a book—on human teenagers—and it says that they can be quite the rebellious type."
"Oh yah, we're all just misunderstood." Mali responded sarcastically, laughing some more.
"Why are you mocking me?" Liara asked, confused. Mali held up a hand to placate her.
"No—not mocking—ju—just—oh just give me a minute." Mali sucked in a huge breath and continued. "I just forget sometimes how little you know about humans."
"Human children." Liara amended her. "I've spent plenty of time around adults."
"Why'd you want to know?" Mali asked.
"No reason. Your species just interests me." Liara answered awkwardly. Mali let it go, but she knew that that wasn't the whole reason. "You still haven't answered my question, what's the deal with you?"
"It's a whole 'nother problem, but if things work out, I'll soon have it fixed." Liara looked at her curiously but Mali was too embarrassed to explain further. She switched paths into the east filed and continued on; in the distance the faint smudge of the tree line could be seen on the horizon.
"The stars are bright tonight." Liara commented as they continued on, her misty breath filling the air. Beside her, Mali looked up. Above her the great expanse of the universe could be seen in all its glory.
"Beautiful." Mali answered. They moved on in silence, and for the first time in a long time Mali and Liara were at peace together. As they continued Mali's eyes became bleary and tired, a look at her omni told her it was turning towards eleven p.m. Her bag slipped off her shoulder and landed with a plunk on the wet grass. Mali bent to pick it up, but Liara was faster.
"Here, let me carry it for a while." Mali struggled for the handles.
"No, it's fine. I can do it." Liara looked her in the eye.
"Mali, it's ok to let others help you. It's not healthy to be alone." She shouldered the bag on her tall frame and they walked on.
"I'm just not used to it, where I come from—"
"Well you're not there anymore, so get used to it." Liara cut in. Mali was surprised to hear a little bit of steel in her voice.
"Why are you suddenly nice to me again? Are you done hating me" Mali asked quietly.
"I never hated you!" Liara exclaimed.
"What about all the "I can't trust you blah blah blah" deal?" Liara just shook her head. "What's bothering you?" Mali asked. Liara stalked on in frustrated steps, marching slightly ahead. "Liara…" Mali started.
"You are bothering me, Somali Avon." Liara said quietly, but angrily.
"Why?" Mali asked.
"Because it's just so hard to get to you! You're defensive—unwilling! You are so lost in your emotions! You won't let anyone help you! You will let no one in—even those who want to be let in. It just frustrates me because I care about you! I want to help you but you aren't letting me! You blow everything out of proportion!" Mali choked back her angry retort as something hit her brain.
"Wait, what did you say?" Mali asked. Liara looked surprised.
"You want to hear it again?" Liara asked, surprised. "Ok, you're emotional, defensive, stubborn—," She started listing off all of Mali's short-comings.
"No not that part—past that." Mali said, kind of dazed.
"What part?" Liara asked, confused.
"The part where you said you cared about me." Mali's voice was soft and vulnerable. She didn't know what had made her say it, but something deep and aching in her chest needed to hear those words again. Liara stopped and turned, something inside her seemed to snap and break out of her chest—a little gasp came from her lips. Then Liara was rushing forward and wrapping her arms around Mali—and Mali found that she was crying and hugging her back, holding on tighter than she had ever held on to anything in her life.
"Oh Mali, I'm so sorry! I was such a fool! I do care about you—more than you know. It was just so hard, I was so confused—I didn't know what to do so I pushed you away. I'm so sorry!" Mali just cried into her shoulder.
"I missed you, I missed you." She kept repeating.
"I know, I know. I did too." Liara hugged her back. After a while Liara pulled Mali away and looked in her eyes. "Mali—there is something I need to tell you, and it can't wait." Mali whipped her eyes and nose, a little self-consciously and smiled a bit.
"What, are you pregnant?" She joked. Liara slapped her on the arm.
"Mali! Asari don't get pregnant on accident. You might not like what you hear."
"We can go to my room, we are almost there anyway." Mali said. "This way." With renewed vigor she led the way to the now encroaching tree line and into the thickest part off it. "We are about a mile and a half away." Mali said.
"From your bunkhouse?" Liara asked.
"Yah." Mali answered. Interest sparked in Liara's eyes. "I've been dying to see it—it's the tree one, right?"
"Yah." Mali said again, but this time with love. The bunkhouse had become a cherished place for Mali, and a deep-rooted affection had grown within her for the tree. She led the way between the thickset trees and brambles.
"Kind of a nuisance to get through though." Liara commented as she batted a thorn branch away.
"You get used to it." Mali said. "It's better than just having an open door saying "come right in! See our tree and its secret location everyone!""
"I guess." Liara answered flatly.
"Just be glad you don't have any hair to get thorns caught on." Mali said, pulling a piece out from a particularly nasty bramble. Suddenly the way cleared and Mali heard a surprised gasp from behind her as Liara saw the tree. "Beautiful, isn't it?" Mali asked with satisfaction.
"It's gorgeous!" Liara exclaimed.
"This way." Liara watched the whole time with amazement as Mali led her through the motions of getting up to the bunkhouse. She couldn't help but glow with pride for her house. She privately reveled at the thought that she had probably been just the same when she had first seen it with Ara. Soon they had entered the bunkhouse and Mali led her to her room. Liara walked in and surveyed the place as Mali kicked off her shoes and headed for the bathroom. "Do you mind?" Mali asked, motioning toward the bathroom.
"Not at all." Liara said. Mali grabbed a few things out of her closet and then rushed to the bathroom, where Liara could hear a shower being turned on. She went and sat on the bed, looking out at the view from Mali's widows. Inside her heart was pounding, and she fought to get it under control. It was time to tell her, no matter what happened. Liara couldn't keep up whatever it was she was doing with Mali. It was just too painful. She sat and waited until Mali came out, freshly clothed in sweats and a white t-shirt, her hair stringy and wet. "Much better." Mali came and sat down next to her on the bed, "so what'd you want to talk about?" She asked. Liara took a deep breath to steady herself.
"Mali, the night after I dropped you off I found out something—something I need to tell you." Mali sat back on the pillows, interested. Liara activated her omni-tool and selected the audio-vid she wanted. "Listen." Liara turned it on, and Officer Clair's voice came out over the speaker.
"Are you awake?" Liara watched Mali's face as the video started to play out, first there was confusion, but as it continued realization dawned on Mali's face.
"Now I am." Came Mali's own grumpy voice.
"Sorry, I was just wondering."
"Well, I don't sleep well anymore, so when I do I like to enjoy it."
"Tomorrow is our last full day on the ship—can I ask you one question?" A tear trickled down Mali's face as she heard her friend's voice.
"Where did you get this?" Mali asked.
"Officer Clair recorded it, and some of your other conversations. I guess she was trying to build a case for your innocence." Liara answered. "But please, just listen."
"I know what I say." Mali said.
"Please Mali, hear it out." They sat in silence as the whole vid played, and then when it was over, Liara quietly shut her omni-tool off.
"What was that all about?" Mali asked, a few tears cloying her cheeks.
"I can see that Officer Clair was special to you Mali, but I swear I didn't bring this up to hurt you or manipulate you in anyway, I only wanted you to hear the story again."
"Why?" Mali asked, a little hurt.
Liara took a deep breath. "To remind you of it—of me. Mali, I was that asari in the story—in our story. When I found out I was shocked. I thought that the little girl I had met so many years ago had vanished, and had probably died. Either way I expected to never see her—you—again. But when I heard that and realized who you were, it scared me. It scared me because I had loved you so much back then—right from the start you had melted my heart. My feelings were so fierce for you Mali—I wanted to adopt you, protect you, and love you. But that was a long time ago, and facing those feelings again with you now—older, braver, and more independent—I just didn't know if it would be the same. I didn't know if you were the same little girl that I bumped into—and if you would still reciprocate my feelings if I ever shared them with you. I was afraid of being hurt. That's why I pushed you away. You were right—what you said back in my classroom—my reasons that I told you where crap. This is the real one. I was wrong for what I did and I'm sorry—I should have never put you through what I did." Mali's mouth was hanging open in shock, and a slightly glazed look had come over her eyes.
"But—but—your dead." Mali said. "You were stabbed! By Mrs. McCruely, right through the heart! I saw your blood on the pavement—I saw you die." She looked at Liara with an overwhelmed expression. "It can't be."
"Yes it can!" Liara exclaimed desperately, she didn't want to lose Mali now. "Look! I have a scar!" She tore at her own clothes, exposing skin just under her left collar bone—a slivery-pale thin white scar, about an inch long marred her blue skin. "She didn't stab me in the heart, she missed! It went in my shoulder instead." Mali reached up, and hesitantly touched the scar. Liara's skin was warm and smooth—soothing to the touch. Under her fingers Mali could feel the small ridge. She placed her hand over her mouth in shock—everything matched up. Flashes of that day started to come back to her—the sunshine, the warmth, the scream that tore from her throat as the asari bent over her wound in agony. "I made it back to my ship, where I used some medi-gel. Then I went to a hospital, by the time I was released two days later you were gone—I couldn't find you. I tried to track down that witch who stabbed me, but she had disappeared. I looked for you for months Mali! Months! You have to believe me! You have to! I'm not lying!" Tears where falling from both their eyes, Liara was looking desperately at the teen, who was sitting stock still with shock, mouth open.
"I didn't abandon you Mali. I loved you—even though it was only one day. I never forgot about you, and I thought about you every day for years afterward. I loved you—and I still do." Pain was welling up inside Mali—not bad pain—but the good kind. She felt sorrow for all their lost time—for all the pain the separation had caused Liara. Inside, something that had long been discarded and forgotten beat back to life—just one soft thump—but it was enough; enough for now.
"I believe you," Mali whispered, tears pouring down her face, "how couldn't I?" Liara lifted tear-filled eyes to the heavens.
"Oh thank the goddess!" She pulled Mali to her and the pair embraced. After a while Mali started laughing. Liara pulled away. "What is it?" She asked Mali, whipping her eyes to clear the waterways.
"Just—it had to be you."
"What?" Liara asked, confused.
"Out of the millions here on Thessia, out of all the professors in this school, your terminal was open to access. I picked you to ask for help—it could have been anyone—but it was you." Mali was shaking her head. "How about that?" Liara pulled Mali to her again and Mali rested her head against her friend, sighing. "It's amazing."
"Mmhm." Liara agreed, holding her tight. "I still can't believe it." Suddenly, as Mali sat there with her, she knew that it was time to tell Liara about the truth about her. She didn't want to keep her secret anymore, she felt like it was holding her down—keeping her from really being with Liara, and after what Liara had shared Mali knew that she never wanted to be apart again.
"I have something to tell you too." Mali said quietly. Liara felt her go tense under her arms and looked down concerned. "It's time I told you about me."
"Mali," Liara tisked, "you don't have to just because I told you something—I can wait. Just wait till you're ready."
"I'm ready now—I want to tell you. This has been weighing me down for a long time—I can't keep it in any longer—its eating me up. It's the reason I can't sleep at night, it's the reason I don't eat, it's the reason that makes me dark and twisted and angry—something I'm not. It's the reason I killed Finnick." Mali sat up. Liara stared at her.
"Well, ok. If you want to."
"Trust me, I do." Mali sighed. "It all started two years after you met me…" Mali started from the beginning and told Liara everything. What her life had been like growing up, how Yane had brought her in and taught her everything she knew—about how he had loved her. And then they got to the hard part. "And then Yane started hitting Finnick's warehouses. It didn't blow over well. He attacked us and cornered us on a rooftop. Yane gave me a cloak and told me to run and I did, and Finnick shot Yane and killed him. Right there, in cold blood. After—I wasn't the same. I was consumed with hatred and rage and all I thought about for weeks after was the look on his face when I showed up on his doorstep and killed him. It ate me alive! It consumed my heart and my love and my happiness." Tears poured down Mali's face; Liara took her hand comfortingly.
"Go on." She reassured her. Mali caught her breath, then continued.
"So I went to our warehouse and prepared—I don't know exactly how long it was, but probably a couple weeks. Then I saddled up and left and went and killed him. I was caught and 'tagged.' It was Officer Clair who caught me. She interrogated me but I said nothing—so they were forced to execute me."
"Execute you?" Liara asked with shock.
"I've had a lot of close calls with death, but that one was the closest," Mali grimly chuckled, "I didn't show up in the system, no birth records, no parents, no anything. She said I basically didn't exist. I had no claim to being a civilian so I had no rights, so I wasn't protected by the law. It was death by firing squad. So they put me against a wall and lined up and were about to shoot when Niles burst in and saved me. He carted me off here and I've been here ever since."
"Wow." Liara stared blankly at a wall, processing.
"I know." Mali said.
"I mean, wow."
"Yah."
"I mean—"
"I get it." Mali said. Liara looked at her.
"I can understand now why you took so long to tell me." Mali nodded, not trusting herself to speak for fear of sobbing. She was surprised when Liara hugged her and cradled her. "Mali I am so sorry you had to go through all of that—no one should watch someone they love die." A sob escaped Mali's throat.
"It's just—he saved my life. And I don't even know if I love him or not!" Mali wailed.
"I know, I know." Liara rubbed her back.
"He was always so good and kind, yet in the end I didn't stand with him—I ran! And he died!"
"It's not your fault Mali, it's not your fault." Mali continued to cry, sobbing into Liara's shoulder. It felt good to get it out, like a weight was finally leaving her chest. Soon she was all cried out, and she just sat there, leaning into Liara's arms.
"Are you okay?" Liara asked quietly when Mali calmed down.
"Surprisingly, yes." Mali hiccupped. "Better than I have in a long time." They sat there for a while longer, enjoying their time. "It's funny," Mali said, "how things always come out in the open together—all at once."
"Yes." Liara agreed. "Very curious indeed." After a while Liara untangled herself form Mali and got up. "It's late. We can talk more about this tomorrow, but for now I need to head home." Something pierced Mali—a longing she couldn't suppress.
"Liara? Can you stay with me?" She asked quietly. Liara looked curiously down at her.
"What?"
"I don't want to be alone. Can you stay with me?"
"Of course." Liara said without hesitation, "I should have expected this, with all you've been through tonight. Of course I'll stay."
"Here." Mali got up and pulled out some more sweats. "Put these on." Liara smiled and disappeared into the bathroom, and while she was inside Mali rearranged the bed sheets which had become rumpled when they were sitting on it. Liara came back out and Mali suppressed a laugh—the sweats were too small, the ends only covering to her mid-calf.
"What?" Said Liara, smiling knowingly.
"Nothing, its ok." Mali answered. Liara slipped under the covers and when she had done so Mali turned out the lights and followed her in. After a brief hesitation Mali gingerly sidled up to Liara, embarrassed, but wanting to be close. Liara unashamedly pulled her closer and wrapped her arm around Mali's waist. Contented, Mali snuggled in.
"Liara?" She said into the darkness.
"Yes?" She softly answered, her voice surprisingly close to Mali's ear.
"Would you have really adopted me, if Mrs. McCruley hadn't interfered that day?" Mali hesitantly asked, she was not used to exposing herself like this.
"Why do you ask?" Liara softly asked.
"Because, "Mali hesitated, then said the words, "Because I wish that you had." Liara's arm tightened around Mali, and Mali surprisingly felt a kiss planted on the side of her head, a little above her ear.
"Of course I would have Mali, I love you." A small sob ripped out of Mali and one last tear trickled out of her eye and soaked into the pillow. Mali was moved by Liara's compassion, like nothing else ever had.
"Thank you." Mali said.
"For what?" Liara asked.
"For saying you love me, even though I've messed a whole load of crap up." Mali answered brokenly; another sob escaped. She could sense that Liara was smiling.
"At least you're admitting to that." She laughed.
"Hey! I was talking from the hear you know! I was baring myself and then you just have to say that! Thanks a lot!" Mali exclaimed. Liara tickled her, making her squeal.
"I just couldn't help myself. With you, you gotta take 'em when you can!"