Zach POV
Breaking bad news to other people is never easy. It's never received well at all, and is certainly not a particularly fun thing to do. But before you can break bad news to others, you first have to accept it yourself. And sometimes, having to acknowledge and grasp things seemingly unbelievable yourself, makes delivering the shattering information to others seem like a cakewalk.
Though still, indisputably, a very undesirable cakewalk.
Cammie
Cammie
CAMMIE
The sound of me shouting her name still rang in my ears, resonated in my head. I could still hear the panic and fear quivering in my voice as I desperately called for her. I could still feel the dread and anguish and loathing coursing through my veins. The fright and distress at losing the one thing in this world that really mattered to me, the one person who really was my world; and anger at the ones who were taking her away from me. I could still remember how time seemed to stop as she dropped to the ground; and then suddenly how everything around me seemed to crumble like her body had seconds before.
And then came the red swirl of anger that fogged my vision. I wanted to cry and scream and…hit something. Or someone…yes… I would make them break; I'd demolish them into pieces, just like they'd done to my heart as they took her away. I channeled the fury, the desolation, the pain, molded it into a cold, pure raging fire of emotion.
And then, just as quickly I felt nothing.
Just the numbness of my body and my mind, and the cold, distant, calculating mentality of a born killer. I was a trained assassin after all, no matter how many people told me otherwise. Then my instincts kicked in and I lashed out amidst the chaos. The numbness washed over me in waves of boiling acid, coursing through my veins sizzling through my blood and filling me with energy. I was completely detached and the only thoughts in my mind were ones of pure revenge. And I fought, cold and calculating but somehow still fueled by an undiminishing feeling of intense hatred. I wouldn't let them take her. They would never take her.
I'm not sure what exactly happened after that. Random bits and pieces flitted through my memories, a flurry of screams and blows and the cracking of bones. Thin ribbons of emotion accompanied them, weaving in and out of the memories. What happened no more than a few minutes ago felt like a distant recollection to me, the events all jumbled up in my mind. I was fairly certain that I had actually killed at least two people, and severely injured 3 times that number. But I just kept going, the numbers and names and techniques and kicks all jumbling together in my mind as I fought. All the while one name slowly taking precedence over all other thought, this one name reverberating in my thoughts.
Cammie.
She was gone. She was gone again, slipping right through my fingertips like water. And once again it was my fault and there was nothing else I could do to stop it. Nothing else I could have done. I fought for her until I had taken out almost all of Tina's lackeys. I fought for her when more appeared and swarmed over me like parasites. I fought for her even after they took her away. I fought for her until I couldn't fight anymore and even then I fought, the words flowing out of my mouth a constant stream of insults and expletives. I fought until the traitor came up to my writhing body ensnared in the grasps of two agents and took out the sedative.
"Relax Zachy, darling." she cooed, her voice sickly sweet. "I'm just going to help you take a nap. Doesn't a nap sound nice? You've fought so hard Zach, but I think its time to rest. Cammie's taking a nice rest too. She's perfectly fine just tired like you. Sleep, Zachary, sleep." And then she stabbed me with the needle.
"No. No. You can't take her! I won't go to sleep, I won't! I hate you Tina. How could you do this to your own sister?" I said franticly, my brain becoming foggy, my breathing heavy.
"Ugh." She said with a tone of disinterest and exasperation. "I really thought you were all better spies than this, especially you of all people. But I guess you're just a bit off your game. Or we're better than you. Yeah I'm gonna go with the latter.
So here's the deal.
Firstly, I'm not Tina you idiot. Tina is currently knocked out in the closet of the police station. Jeez. My name is Colleen. Colleen Maxwell.
And secondly, the only reason I'm telling you this is because I want you to know. I want you to go back to your pathetic little friends and tell them exactly who did this. I want them to know it was me who took your girlfriend. Who is taking her to your mother. I want you to know that it is I, Colleen Maxwell, who is taking her from you. I'm taking the one you love from you, because SHE took my brother from me. I want you to feel the pain of knowing exactly who it was who took her from you, but being helpless and unable to do anything about it. So goodbye Zachary. Tell your friends I said hello."
"Why are you leaving me? Why aren't you taking me, or all of us. Take me instead." I slurred. My words were jumbled, my thoughts drowsy with sleep, and my head pounding and heavy.
"Oh Zachary. Why do you ask questions you already know the answers too?" she replied patronizingly. I could just make out a malicious grin stretch across her face as she lowered her head to whisper in my ear. Her hair made a curtain around us, creating an illusion of privacy and safety.
"Why don't you just sleep on it? I'm sure the answers will find you soon enough Though they might just be answers you don't want to hear. "
I felt the last threads of control slip away form me as I slumped down to the ground.
And only then did I stop fighting.
Which brings me back to my current position face down on the ground.
I knew I needed to get up, needed to get to the gang right away so we could start looking.
But... my resolve was gone. All I wanted to do was lie there wallowing in grief and remorse forever. I had let them take her. But what else could I have done. I fought my hardest, I never gave up, but now I was starting to feel hopelessness seeping into my mind, poisoning me with fear. What did she mean by that? I thought. What do I already know? And what do I know that I don't want to know?
I shudder at that. Any reason for my mother taking Cammie was going to be a dreadful one, and I knew this. So whatever it was that I knew was going to be bad. So I can't give up I thought to myself. If I want to save her, I can never give up. She would never wan me to give up. She needs me, needs all of us.
The thought gave me a sudden burst of strength and I pushed myself up off the grimy and bloody pavement barely feeling the throbbing my head, and sharp pain in my ribs and shoulder. I quickly assessed the damage and determined I had dislocated my shoulder, probably broken a few ribs, and had attained a mild concussion. It was actually not the worst outcome when you think about the situation; one assassin against roughly 20 assassins. So lucky me I guess.
Ignoring the fire pulsing in my shoulder, I heaved my body upward and the stumbled, sagging against the wall of one of the building, the graffiti mixed with the dried splatters of blood.
I have to keep going. I have to get to the others. I told myself.
I pushed off the wall and made my way slowly back to the building. When I got to the door I gritted my teeth and yanked it open the pain in my arm almost doubling. I smothered my gasp at the sharpness and stepped through the door; only to be met with a sharp blow to said concussed head.
"Oomph" I let out a noncommittal noise as I stumbled to the ground.
"Owww. Grant." I muttered.
I heard a soft "Oops" and then a smack. Even in times of total peril I could always count on Bex. "Sorry mate." he said as he reached out a hand and lifted me up. "Can someone turn on the lights?"
Almost instantly the lights turned on revealing Grant and Bex near the door, probably guarding it, and the rest of the gang huddled around a scared looking Jonas and a petrified Liz who looked like she'd just been crying. At least no one else was gone.
"We saw two goons coming and one of them grabbed me and they were going to take me away and I was so scared…"Liz trailed off starting to shake. "But then Jonas came around the corner and used our new shock weapon and saved me." She said looking up at Jonas with pure and innocent adoration. It sent a pang of regret through me. Jonas saved Liz, but I didn't save Cammie. I couldn't save her…It was my fault…where did I go wrong…
"What happened?" I asked Grant, forcing those depressing and self-deprecating thoughts back inside. Focus, Zach, focus.
Grant only then looked at me and did a double take, as if he was seeing me for the first time. Bex just pushed around me, craning her neck as if looking for someone.
Someone who wasn't there I realized, and another jolt of pain went through my body this time not from any of my injuries. She's gone, gone… gone…
I guess Grant saw the look on my face then, because he instantly sobered.
"I think the better question is what happened to you? You look positively awful!"
"Yeah," said Bex, who turned to look at me for the first time as well, "And where's Cammie? Shouldn't she be right behind you?"
I'm not sure when, but somehow the room had become deathly quiet, so quiet you could hear a pin drop, and in that moment everyone seemed to freeze.
So I stayed quiet, and looked away avoiding the troubled and questioning looks sent in my direction.
That was the only answer Grant needed.
"Oh my God no. Oh my God Zach I…I'm so sorry. I can't… oh Camster…" He whispered disbelieving, his voice starting to quake. Though it was said quietly, his voice was amplified throughout the room and everyone else suddenly looked up at us.
One look. One look at both of us was all it took for them to know.
One look was all it took for Liz to burst into tears again and for Jonas to put his arms around her pulling her to him as she bawled.
One look was all it took for Preston's face to turn to stone.
One look at us for Macey McHenry, stoic and calm as always, to audibly sigh and turn away her eyes already glassy. Because the minute the light had turned on in the room and she had seen me, she had known. She just hadn't wanted to believe it. None of us did.
And Bex still standing there took one look at everyone else and saw it all. And yet she didn't cry. She didn't shake. She didn't yell or punch a wall or react at all she just stood there still and stoic like a lion.
And then she turned to me.
It caught me off guard the way she acted; it was like…she hadn't realized it yet.
And the sudden realization hit me, that she had realized it. She just hadn't accepted it at all.
Then she tilted her head inquisitively and her eyes seemed to bore into my soul.
"Zach? Is Cam still doing recon? Because I know you guys almost never split up from each other. So what's she doing? Perimeter? Research? What?"
"Bex…" I started warily, afraid that id I said the wrong thing she'd explode and bite my head off. Sometimes you had to act like she was a wild animal and approach her quietly and calmly, trying to get her to trust you. Moving slowly lest you took on wrong step and she lashed out at you with snarling and swiping with her bared claws.
"Just tell me Zach. She's not with you, and she's certainly not missing." She said reverently emphasizing the last past of the sentence. So it was true. She was in a state of denial. And there was nothing to do but tell her the very thing she already knew and had deemed impossible to save her sanity.
"Bex…" I started again, this time a bit more impatiently.
"Zachary…"she mirrored, getting impatient herself. "Where the heck is she? Zachary Goode you better tell me right now or so help me God I will –"
"SHE"S GONE BEX!" I exploded, the last of my control dissolving. I felt the last thread snap and I fought to hold myself together to regain control.
I turned away my fists clenching and unclenching. I could almost see her face as it went from eerie calm to disbelief, to sadness and then to anger.
"No. no. No she's not.'
I regained my control and took a deep breath and turned backto her, my face showing nothing but empathy, the rest hidden behind my mask of stone.
"They took her Bex. I tried, I tried so hard and we…we fought so hard. But they took her. And she's gone."
"No." she said fiercely, unable to accept the truth staring her in the face. And then just like that she blew up.
"NO. SHE IS NOT GONE. WHY ARE YOU LYING TO ME ZACH? WHY WOULD YOU LIE TO ME? WHY? Why…why would you…why… no… oh my God no." she trailed off no longer capable of fending off the truth any longer.
"Oh Cam…" she murmured and fell back against the wall as if all her strength had been drained from her body.
Silently Macey stood up and walked over to Bex. She gently put her arms around her and held her. Liz stopped crying and stood up next walking over and hugging them both tightly. I felt an arm go around my shoulder and a hand on my other and I turned to both of my best friends who were looking at me with identical mixes of sadness and compassion. Then Preston walked over and joined us, with the same look of utter loss. And I realized then just how much Cammie meant to Preston. She had saved his life after all.
In that moment we were all connected. Connected by a great sadness and fear.
And we stood together in that silence holding each other up. We stood there for a moment, as we grieved for who was gone, and prepared ourselves to get her back.
Because we WOULD get her back.
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I feel like that ending was not at all satisfactory… in fact I kinda feel like this whole chapter is not really satisfactory. But I had to type the rest of this in the morning (which, if you know me, is actually when I'm not really feeling the 'creative juices' flowing) because I felt bad that I STILL updated late even though I had less to write (I had already written the second half of this. Which is odd, because normally you write the beginning before the end of a chapter. But I'm weird like that soooooooooooo.) However, I ended up splitting this chapter and the next chapter because 17 pages is a lot for one chapter SOOO in the end I actually ended up writing a full chapter anyways. So the amount of writing was the same. Am I making sense here? Ehh oh well, if you get it great if you don't, don't stress it.
SHOUTOUTS! ( ONCE AGAIN I FORGOT TO DO THEM LAST CHAPTER SO I"LL DO THEM NOW AS WELL)
Chapter 15
GallagherGirls13BYE
hannahslye
tobyequalshottness
mahigirl
Captain Hook the ninja
Guest (6 times! Literally I was cracking up when I read them in order. Love you girl!)
Kat(guest)
Chapter 16
GallagherGirls13BYE
miaadventure
mahigirl
Kayla (guest)
Thank you all so much for your support!
Special shoutout to maggie dc.89 for correctly finding both quotes!
The second quote was from the movie Princess Bride (love this movie so much)! The real quote: My name is Anigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
K so that's it I think. I might (once again. I hope I'm not lying this time XD) update the next chappie quicker so yeah, expect it in maybe…2 weeks instead of a month lol.
As always please send me any feedback, favorite, follow and of course R&R
Love ya,
Courtney