Hi guy... long time no see, do ya even recognize me?

I'm so sorry that I haven't updating. I really just became so swamped with summer school and just in general I've been really stressed. I almost didn't want to continue this story (I almost deleted it twice) I'm kinda starting to doubt it a little (like, I don't think this story is at all interesting) It makes me a little sad because I really love writing but it's just been giving me so much anxiety. I'm probably not going to stop writing it but the updates will be a little bit more separate (Though I don't think many of you guys really notice anyways)

And after I finish this one I think I might start a new one (because I have a new idea that makes me really exited) but the thought of wring it is still making me really nervous ;_;

Sorry for the little rant, I'm just feeling a little down. But don't worry about me.

Alright, so since I don't know whether this story is going well or not I'm gonna ask you guys, lemme know in the comments if theres something that you want to see (I'm running out of ideas before I end it)

Okay! So like the old days, thanks for reading and please comment to let me know how I'm doing, if you want. You guys are all wonderful people and I hope you have a better day that the ones I've been having ^_^

Stay imperial ✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ:* \(◕‿◕✿)/ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

~Mona

P.S. Sorry for the spelling errors (I know there are still some hiding in there)

The next morning I woke up with the early May sun shining in through the slightly grungy looking windows. It actually could have been a nice day. I bet the birds were chirping and the weather was relatively nice. It was May after all. Everything could have been really nice and relaxing if it didn't feel like my brain was in a never-ending race against my sanity.

There are a few things that I know for sure now and a bunch of things that could pretty much be scripted in Chinese because it would make no difference to me.

Even with a brain full of puddy I still woke up and pulled myself out of bed, though with all honesty I would have rather just stayed under the covers forever. Actually, I would have rather not to have been here at all.

Why'd I have to leave my house?

I was pacing now. Sleepily grading my feet from the bed to the far corner and back.

Break all the rules?

Listen to Astrid and go to a stupid bar?

Why'd I have to ever meet Jack in the first place, really?

It seems like every moment after he walked into my life things started happening. Which maybe wasn't the worst thing, but with him it really was the worst

No matter how hard I tried to just close my eyes and block everything out, Jacks stupid face kept floating back into my brain. His blank face with those cryptic eyes.

God, why the hell did he do that to me?

The scene constantly replayed in my mind. Dagger and the flirting then Jack coming to save the day, the kiss then the down hill tornado of confusion and Jacks face. I think I would be a little bit more okay with all this if Jacks face made even a little bit of sense to me. But no. I couldn't read an inkling of what was going on in there. I mean, was I a bad kisser? I don't really think I'm that bad. Inexperience maybe but not bad. Well now I'm offended.

Did he feel bad because he was with Aster?

Shit, he's with Aster.

Obviously he was upset. He has this big, scary and yet attractive Australian guy on his arm and he goes and kisses me. I'd be upset too. Just by the down grade in boyfriend quality. Or just quality in general. I mean how am I supposed to compare with a big, muscular cool guy with an accent. The only thing I have in common with him is my height and on my it looks like I'm an awkward piece of uncooked noodle.

But that shouldn't even matter to me.

I mean I'm- I'm.… Straight!

I like Girls. I know I do. I liked Astrid and I like Cami. Sort of.

The kiss was good but it was just a kiss wasn't it.

A kiss that's still in the back of my mind.

But I'm pretty sure that's normal, I mean it was a little unusual.

But so are my feelings when I think about it. I should be uneasy or weirded out or something but I just feel kind of tingly and nervous.

I don't even know what I'm nervous about.

Facing Jack after this?

Never getting to see Jack again after this?

I mean that in a totally platonic way. He's my best friend and I guess I'm probably just feeling nervous that this might have just ruined our friendship.

Gods, this is the kind of time when I really do need a best friend.

Which reminds me, where the heck is Astrid.

As if my words were some sort of spell I just cast, the moment Astrid passed through my mind the lock on the door clicked and she slipped in.

She had a huge grin on her face.

"Hi, Hic" she said unusually happily.

I just grumble in response. This whole Jack thing was really getting me down. "Why are you so happy?"

"Oh you know, I just had a good night, lots of fun, how about yours?"

I looked over at Astrid from the other end of the room. She was in a old pair of sweats and a hoodie that fit her a little small. That could only mean one thing. "Did ya lose your dress on your way home?'

"I lost a few things on my way home" She said with a dazed smile as she pulled the elastic out of what I was guessing was some sort of bun. She let her hair fall around her shoulders. It was really messy, the kind of messy that you could only get from-

"Aw gross Astrid, you didn't!"

"It depends what I did and didn't do" God, stop being so mysterious, you're not hiding anything.

"Your hair and facial expression says it all"

"Okay, what ever Hic. I never invited you into my bedroom life" She snapped.

"Ahh, I don't want to know that you have a bed room life"

"Stop being stupid, you basically said it first"

"But I didn't want to hear you say it!" I whined. Suddenly my situation was a fleck of dust.

"I didn't even say anything, for all you know your bedroom life could be Mario Carts on the Wii"

"But I already know it's something more on the lines of Twister"

"Hiccup, you're just making it worse for yourself. I got laid okay? There I said it. Now let's move on!"

"But how would that even work between two-"

"Hiccup, I said move on! Plus I already asked you, how did your night go?"

Just like that, Astrid's situation meant nothing again. Jack's blank face and confusing eyes seeped back into my memory.

There was really no need to tell her, right? I mean it was just an accident and Astrid would take this to a whole new level. Maybe it's better if she never finds out. It's not like Jack's gonna tell her either. Especially with the way he acted last night.

"It was fun I guess. Parties aren't really my thing though" I said as casually as I could though I could feel that my tone was shouting what? No, I'm totally not hiding anything, Astrid!

She narrowed her eyes at me. "Oh okay, well what did you guys end up doing together?"

Kissing

"Oh we just talked and stuff."

"Really, about what?"

I don't know, we didn't really talk much. Why are you being so nosey anyways!

"Just about life. What life's like with out each other again"

"Really, so you just talked?" She said slowly.

Oh no, this was scaring me. Her tone was scaring me. Did she know? Did Jack actually tell her what happened? He wouldn't. Would he?

"Uh yeah, just talked and hung out" I replied quickly, careful not to say too many words. Who knows what could come out of this mouth when it's under stress.

Astrid stared at me intently as she walked over to the bed. Her eyes didn't leave me. "Well, that doesn't sound very fun"

She was still scaring me. Why was she staring at me like she could see right through me. This was really stressing me out. She couldn't possibly know. Oh dear god don't let her know. My heart beat picked up a little. Like it does when I lie.

"But it was fun. Just hanging out with Jack is fun. We just walked and talked"

"You walked too? Whered you go?" Can you please get out of my business little miss nosey Mcnosey-Pants.

"He just walked with me back home" Now I have to be careful what I say. Anything could sound like a dating innuendo. He walked me home. Wow that sounds like a date.

"Okay Hiccup I can't handle this anymore!" She blurted out

I looked at her wide eyed "What did I do?"

Please don't say it, Please don't say it, Oh please don't s-

"Just tell me that you and Jack kissed!" She whined

"Jack and I? What! Pfftt, who told you that?" I stuttered.

"Hiccup, you look stupid when you lie"

"Well you look stupid when- all the time" I muttered lamely, "But anyways, who told you?!"

"So you did kiss?"

"We- I… Who told you" I demanded a little bit more desperately.

"Oh…. Finally" She said with a relieved sigh

"…huh?" I stared at her in confusion. What? How did she know? How could Jack tell her? Why was she so happy? Isn't she the one that set me up with her cousin? Does she not care that I basically cheated on her cousin? Wait! Finally!?

"I was beginning to thing that Jack was going to bale out on me soon" she said with a breathy laugh "But he finally pulled through!"

"What did he pull through with?"

"Kissing you. Or anything like that really. I would have been totally okay with just a hand holding or something, but a kiss! Damn bro, how'd it happed?"

"Uhh" My mouth opened and closed like a fish under water. But unlike a fish, I wasn't even breathing. I stood there uselessly in my corner of the room. I was so confused.

"What?"

""Hiccup, why can't you just tell me that you kissed Jack!"

"Ahhh" I screamed and pulled my hands to my ears. "It sounds worse when someone else says it out loud"

"Hiccup"

I mean in my head it sound weird enough but out loud it's just so-"

"God, Hiccup shut up, I can't even understand you"

"What"

"Jack is freaking hot. How could you not be happy that you guys kissed? I mean you're perfect for him"

"What would did you know. And why aren't you mad?"

"Well I'm a little mad now."

"I'm so confused" I sat down beside Astrid and rubbed my face.

"This was my plan in the first place. Well plan C anyways"

Plan C, like there was an A and a B? Wait what plan even? "What are you talking about?!"

"God, You know Hiccup, sometimes you're such an oblivious idiot"

"Oblivious? You know there's a different between me being oblivious and you being cryptic"

"Not about this! Just about life"

"Astrid, you're still not making any sense?"

'Okay let me explain this to you" She said putting her hands on my shoulders. "Jack like you a lot."

I opened my mouth to speak but she just glared up me "Shut up, I'm not done yet"

Jack liked me? "But he's dating-"

"Anyways He didn't really know how to get around to telling you because you're such an idiot. So we made the plan to get you two together"

"Did it never once hit you guys that I was straight?"

"Hiccup, you're not straight"

"I am though. I've never liked any of the boys back in Berk"

"Neither did I"

"but you're gay"

"Exactly"

"That makes no sense"

"What ever"

"But I have a girlfriend"

"Who got you that girlfriend?"

"Wait, was that part of your stupid plan too!?"

"Alright" She said, totally ignoring me again "Jack told me he liked you all the way back in like October so we planned to drag you along to Kensington with us."

"Wait so is that why we went swimming and stuff?" I was actually surprised how calm I was acting.

"Yeah, but he chickened out so we were going to try something else but he said he didn't want to because you were straight and he didn't want to be the loser pining for a straight boy. But I told him to keep trying because you were just stupid. So I sent you two on yet another date but this time in Bergess. It was going to be awesome and he was going to tell you everything but then his whole family came around and everything got a little derailed"

"yeah, and he started dating his ex" I said obviously, trying to find holes in her plot.

"Well not actually. After he saw Aster, he texted me and I told him to keep it going"

"Why the hell would you do that? You know that made me really sad" I whined.

"Will you please stop interrupting?" she snapped, "anyways, I wanted him to pretend to get back with his old boyfriend and move back home to show you that you needed him. And then I gave you a girlfriend to show you that no one was better than Jack"

"Whoa whoa whoa" I interrupted "You gave me a girl friend to make a point that I was gay?'

"So you admit it?"

"I never said that!"

"Stop being so stubborn. You can like both you know"

"I guess. But let's say that hypothetically I am gay" Maybe "Why would Jack and I work? How would we work?" Jack was all cool and brave and nothing fazes him. Me on the other hand was basically scared of everything.

"I don't even know. It just works. You're all worried all the time and you don't like to talk and you like to be all grumpy and into your work and stuff but Jacks all happy and snowballs and fun times. He can make you smile like no one else can. Haven't you even noticed that? He always makes you smile. Even right now! You're smiling right now! You always are!"

Until she pointed it out I hadn't really noticed. Maybe she was right. Maybe we could work. Maybe I could even see us together I mean, I wanted us to move out of Berk together since the day I met him. But that was more of a I'm going to use you to my advantage, now it's more of a you're kinda cute and I wouldn't mind hanging around with you all the time and stuff.

"Okay fine, But then why is it that he literally hasn't spoken to me since the kiss. Even when we walked back to the motel. Barely a word"

I looked over at her and I could see the cogs in her head turning.

"Hiccup, I really don't know"

She told me ask she pulled out her phone "Maybe he's texted me" She clicked her phone and swiped and messed around a little on her device

"Sorry hic, there isn't anything. I don't know what's up with him. I'll text him again"

I nodded and slumped a little bit.

"This is stupid" Astrid slumped over too "I finally get you to realize you're totally for the dudes then the other one has to clock out on me just like you were. God, I hate Jack. Why is he such a dick?" She wasn't slumped anymore. Her fist were clenched and she was biting on her bottom lip.

"Astrid calm-"

"No! This isn't fair to you. All he could talk about since the first day he came to Berk was you. Your hair, your freckles, your buckteeth. You name it, we spoke about it. We go through all this planning and scheming and now, finally, he finally got somewhere and now he just disappears."

Astrid it's really fine" I mean sure, it kinda sucked, but She didn't have to get so upset. He was just a guy after all. Attractive and amazing yes, but still just another guy.

"No. We played with your feelings enough. This was supposed to be your happy ending, hiccup. You guys were supposed to move away together or something.

"Astrid, I'm fine. See" I said pointing to my smile. It wasn't all-fake. I wasn't all that upset. More so disappointed.

"What ever, let's go home and pretend we were just having a really intense movie marathon" She offered, getting up and grabbing her bag and heading for the door.

"Sure, I guess"

There was only one thing that was still bugging me in the back of my mind. Jack liked me. Apparently he liked me a lot. But then we kissed. Planned or not we kissed and I thought it was good. Though I could probably go to my grave with out saying it, I actually felt something. I really did. Though I don't think he did.

Did I actually turn him off because of a kiss? I wasn't even that bad of a kisser. I kiss Cami all the time. Which reminds me, I should really break up with her or something.

"Hey Astrid?" I started once we were seated in my car and on our way home "You and Ana, you guys aren't just part of the plan, right. You guys actually have a thing right?"

"Oh no! I love Ana"

"Oh thank god, I totally shipped you two." I laughed a little. More of a dry laugh though "Wait, love like like or love like love?" She couldn't actually love Ana could she?

"Um well, I think we're going to be moving in together soon. Right now, I just really like her, but I don't think we're ending anytime soon" She smiled.

Well, at least one of us got our happy ending.