I could see and hear everything that was going on around me, only I had no control over anything. I was screaming inside my own body but no words would come, only hers. She laughed and tried to stop me from fighting back. I fought the best I could before I saw Sam.
He was just standing at the end of the hall with Ruby just behind him. He looked angry and yet not at all worried that Lilith had just taken over my body. "Sam stop!" I cried but she raised my arm and closed the door before they could get to me.
"This should be fun." She smiled. Without skipping a step Sam busted the door open and walked in. He had this eerie calmness to him as Ruby just stared at him with a small smile. "Hi." Lilith smiled at Sam and he didn't even flinch. He raised his arm quickly and sent me flying back. I felt my body smash against the altar and my head knock the stone.
"I'm going to give you one chance. Get out of her now." Sam ordered.
"Sorry... I like it in here. Nice and comfy." She winked up a Sam as he pinned me to the altar.
"Fine." He sighed looking back to Ruby who just nodded. It was quiet as Sam stared down at me but he no longer saw me, all he saw was the demon and I could tell it no longer matter to him. "I've been waiting for this for a very long time." he smirked as he took a step forward.
"Give it your best shot." Lilith said through her teeth. That's when I saw him, just at the end of the hall. Dean was standing there staring at Ruby. She turned and shut the door.
"DEAN!" I called out but of course it was useless.
Sam just stared down at me and just the way his stare pierced me he seemed different. Like the Sam I knew was not standing in front of me. It was like the demon blood was changing him. He smiled and I sighed inside. That was it. I was dead.
All Sam had to do was raise his arm and a wave of pain and heat came from my chest. A bright yellow-orange glowed from me and Lilith and I both screamed out in pain. It was the most intense and wost pain I could ever imagine and I doubt I would ever encounter anything that exhausting and painful ever again.
"Sammy!" We all hear Dean's muffled cries from the door. He was banging and begging for Sam.
"please..." I begged from inside and Sam slowly put his arm down and the pain slowly went away.
"Sammy!" Dean cried again.
"What are you waiting for! Kill her!" Ruby was screaming at Sam. I could see through the my fuzzy vision how confused Sam looked. How could he not know Dean would find him?
"Sam..." I called out but not a word was uttered.
The Lilith started to laugh and I begged her to stop. She looked up at Sam and just laughed. "You turned yourself into a freak." She laughed with a sigh. "A monster, and now you're not gonna bite?" She laughed.
"Don't listen to her Sam!" I cried.
"I'm sorry but that is honestly adorable." She said with a smirk.
Sam shook his head and raised his arm again. I took one last look before the pain started cutting off my vision. Sam's eyes turned black and that's when the real fear set in. Pain and light came in waves after that. He would start then stop just to toy with Lilith. It was exhausting and I could slowly feel myself giving up. As he raised his arm again I could feel my skin burning and I screamed in agony.
"Sam please!" I cried as i felt my skin rip. I turned my head quickly as Sam stopped and could barely see but I knew I was bleeding. My forearms had been cut diagonally and blood started to seep quickly. Sam raised his arm one more time and I could feel Lilith die inside me. One minute she was controlling me and then the next it felt like she had twisted out.
"Stop!" I screamed out and my voice actually registered. Sam dropped his arm quickly and stared at me as I slowly lifted my head weakly. "Sammy..." I said softly my voice cracky and full of hurt and pain.
"What are you doing?" Ruby chimed in and jumped next to Sam. "Don't stop kill her!" She yelled.
"Sam stop... this isn't you." I said quietly and Sam looked down.
"That isn't Clara. Lilith is messing with you." Ruby smiled in my direction and Sam raised his arm again. This time the glow from my chest was white and blue. The pain increased and it felt like he was setting my one fire on the inside.
I screamed out in pain, more than Lilith did and begged Sam to stop. "It's me! Please! Sam!" I cried as the cuts on my arms began to rip deeper and the blood started to flow to the ground and pool. As my blood drained and I could barely hold myself up I used all my strength just to look up at Sam. My eyes were tearing and trying so hard not to cry anymore then I was but as I opened my mouth more tears streamed from my face. "She wouldn't want this for you." I said softly and Sam put his arm down and his eyes went back to normal. I started breathing heavily, trying to catch my breath.
"What?" his own voice was shaky.
"Sam..." Ruby started.
"Jessica, she wouldn't want this for you." I choked out as blood started to run from my mouth. "Please... stop before it's too late..." My voice slowly loosing it's volume as my eyes started to fade closed.
"Sam!" Dean's voice registered in my head last and a small smile came to my face.
"Kill her now." Ruby pushed Sam. "That is still Lilith."
"She's lying." I added as I looked down. "You have to stop... please..." I lifted my head one last time and Sam just stared at me. I felt very weak and it was like my whole body was burned and drained. "sam." I barely got out before he lifted his arm one last time. It didn't take long before everything went white then black. I felt my body hit the ground and the blood start to pour again.
"You did it." Ruby laughed. I hated that I couldn't just die. I wanted to just close my eyes but I could still hear everything as I lay on my back staring at the ceiling unable to move. "It was touch and go for a while but... you did it."
"Ruby what the hell is going on?" Sam's voice finally turned to shock.
"You did it." She sighed.
"What? What did I do?" Sam asked quickly.
"You opened the door, and now he's free at last." Ruby laughed. I knew she was a part of this! My mind was still begging for Sam to just kill her now and at least try to stop me from dying but I knew that wasn't going to happen.
"No no...he.. no.. Lilith I stopped her." Sam panicked. "I killed her!"
"And it is written, the first demon shall be the last seal." Ruby sighed. "Takes an angel to bring one back." She quoted Lilith. "And you busted it open, and guess who's coming to dinner." Ruby laughed as Sam started to move. I tried to move my head slightly but it was hopeless. I was minutes away from bleeding out.
"Oh my god." Sam said and just in his tone I could tell it had finally register what he had done.
I shut my eyes just for a second to try to drown out the noise. It was fading but I could still hear her. I wanted so bad to get up and kill her myself. I had tried to get my mind off of all this but I heard footsteps coming toward me. "No... nno.." Sam's voice cracked and I felt his light touch on my wrist. "Clara." he said shaking my slightly. I couldn't help but cry out in pain. My eyes shot open and all I saw was Sam next to me looking like a terrified little puppy. "No, no." He was now begging me.
"You don't even know. No one did. I was the best of those sons of bitches! The most loyal!" Ruby started to yell and Sam didn't look up. He just stared down at me with big teary eyes. "Not eve Alistair knew! Only Lilith..." Sam looked up quickly. "Yeah I'm sure you're a little angry right now but come on Sam. Even you have to admit! I'm awesome!" She laughed.
Sam's hold of my had slowly let go. "You bitch! You lying bitch!" He yelled and jumped to his feet. he threw his arms forward and he tried to use his powers on her but she didn't even move. Then Sam started to fall. One knee at a time he fell to the ground and half his body landed over me.
"Don't hurt yourself Sammy it's useless." Ruby started and I felt Sam take my hand again as he sat up in front of me. "you shot your payload on the boss.
"You poisoned me!" Sam yelled.
"No... It wasn't the blood. It was you." Ruby started to close closer. That's when everything got even more fuzzy. My vision all but gave out and my eyes started to close. Sam's grip on my hand let me know I was still alive but fading fast. I couldn't hear anything but mumbles and my whole body started to throb. Then the door started to bang. Dean was still out in the hall trying to get in. With ever bang sent a loud echo through my head.
I felt my mind slipping and then parts of me started to lose their feelings. First I could no longer feel my chest moving up and down, then I couldn't feel Sam's grip anymore, and last were my legs. Even if I tried I doubt I would ever be able to move them. I was already giving up on myself when I heard my name.
"Clara..." The voice sounded far and quiet. "Come on.. open your eyes. You're not dying today." The voice got closer. "Hey! Please!" Dean's voice finally got to me and my eyes opened slowly. I looked up and him and Sam were both at my side. Dean was closer to my head and shoulders while Sam stayed back. Sam's eyes were over flowing with tears of pain and anger. He looked over at me first and I couldn't say anything, I just tried to smile. I looked up at Dean slowly and as soon as I saw him I started to cry again.
"I'm sorry..." My voice was very low and scared. He quickly grabbed my hand and moved hair away from my face and stroked my cheek.
"Hey.. stop it." He said his own voice cracking. "I just need you to wait okay. We are gonna get you out of here." Dean said as he slowly put one arm under my neck. Once I screamed in pain he stopped. Every time I moved or he moved me it burned and I knew if I stood I was a goner.
"No." I breathed out quickly my breathing starting to get rapid and painful. "Go... you two get out of here." I begged my eyes slowly closing again. "You..." I paused and took a deep breath. "Don't have much time." I said smiling up at Dean. I could see all the pain in his eyes. He didn't want to leave me there and I sure as hell didn't want to leave him but I didn't exactly have that many options. "Go.." I whispered as my vision finally started to fade.
"No no... hey!" Dean's voice was the last I heard before I felt my whole body going numb. The last actual part of myself I felt was my cheek. Dean had leaned over and placed a soft kiss then everything was dark and just empty.