Authornote: Yes. My schedule is finally settling back down to something I can predict(though still on call during the week). The random schedule has also eaten into my writing time, so hoping to get more writing done than I have the last week or two. I will be posting on Tuesdays, though if I get a random call out, I on that day, then expect the chapter on Wednesdays. Also, wanted to share this review from last week.
Reviewer: Make a cake : "So Naruto will have NO pairing while others will?... well that just sucks."
No. I am not deleting this review. In fact, you made my day with that comment with that name, Make a cake. It's just perfect considering your review is on the chapter before the reveal on what Naruto's love life will be like. And to answer, Naruto does have a few possible pairings, though he will be going through some romance with one pairing for this volume. As to who? Well, not saying. This chapter answers the who and what kind of relationship our OP Druid will be having. Hope you all enjoy this chapter as much as I had fun writing it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Log Horizon. This is a fanfiction used to help with my writing skills and the fact I enjoy writing stories like these. All I own is the ideas and sub-plots used to make this fanfiction and explore Log Horizon and Naruto in a different way. Also, don't own any of the games and anime I make reference to in this story, but still got to give homage to video games since this is technically a video game fanfiction as well.
"Itachi&Kisame… Do you still remember the Massacre?" Sasuke asked, holding onto a cup of coffee.
"Yes. I do. Though, seems all of Konoha has almost forgotten the details from what Naruto-kun gotten from the Hokage." Itachi&Kisame sighed, also holding a cup of coffee. "If you still want revenge, I understand. I will not be surprise everyone in the clan will revive with no memory of me as all my records have been replaced over with Naruto's avatar. Only you will probably remember me as your brother… Or is it sister with being stuck a girl?" Itachi&Kisame sheepishly laughed, a crooked smile on her face.
"No." Sasuke grimace, I don't want revenge when Hamelin made what you did seem like pure mercy. "I just want the truth. Why did you kill everyone?"
"You know this is probably the most awkward time to be asking this." Itachi&Kisame said, pointing out the fact they were both hiding out in a tiny makeshift kitchen. Outside the small building the two were in, many people were busy building up Santa's Workshop or working on crafting items within makeshift workshops.
"I know. It's just I want to ask in case you do forgot, but… Naruto's a slave driver." Sasuke groaned, taking a sip of his coffee. He's worse than Hamelin. He had Touya, Isuzu, Shikamaru, Shino, and I change our sub-class to Apprentice and been working us to death. We are either out helping capturing monsters for supplies or crafting till we drop.
"Naruto-kun is on a level of his own. I don't even think he has slept last night for sure." Itachi&Kisame chuckled, "Though, I am amazed at how merciless Shiroe-kun and Naruto-kun are. It makes me feel even less of a ninja than I did before."
"Hey, back on my question. Why did you kill our clan?" Sasuke snapped, glaring at his now sister.
"Coup." Sasuke's eyes widen while Itachi&Kisame put her head back against the wall. "I won't get into why our clan was wanting to do it since they won't remember. However, do not hate Konoha for it. The Hokage was doing everything he could to keep it from happening. I only went with his advisors with finding a bigger threat and convincing it to kill our clan instead of Konoha."
"A bigger threat?" Sasuke asked, looking at Itachi&Kisame in horror. So, our own clan was the cause of their demise? I was heading the same way. Did Ita-No… She thought she was doing the right thing to get me to focus on revenge. She gave me a goal to get stronger… But, not to kill her. To be strong enough to face that threat once I killed her. Sasuke grimace, looking at his reflection in his coffee.
"Sadly, I can't even remember it's gender. All I can remember is it was the caused for the Fox to attack Konoha 12 years back." Itachi&Kisame said, sipping her coffee. "Like Naruto-kun said, the two worlds are wiping out the threats from the Noosphere and giving them a second chance in a new form or life. However, I was in the wrong taking on all the hate with killing our clan. I thought I could bare all the responsibility on my shoulders and protect both Konoha and you… Only, I did not realize I was just playing right into other people's plans and possibly making things worse." Itachi&Kisame frowned, her eyes watering up.
"Itachi&Kisame, did… Mom and Dad say anything before they died? Did they know they were going to die?" Itachi&Kisame looked at Sasuke with shock. "I've died several times already. It's… scary. I don't think I will ever get used to it. Every time I feel like a failure."
"Indeed. I, too, know that feeling… Though, it's better than what else I been through," Sasuke looked back at Itachi&Kisame, shocked to see tears going down her face and trembling. "They knew. Our father knew the clan had no chance, yet no one would allow Father to take them off course. He told me he was proud of both of us before I killed Mother and him… But, how is that true when I wasn't even able to protect myself let alone anyone else?" Itachi&Kisame sobbed, barely holding onto her coffee.
"Ita-" Sasuke frowned before putting his coffee down and hugged his sister. "Nee-chan. What happened to you?" Sasuke asked, recognizing the very look on his sister's face. I was the same after the clan was massacred by her. I was even horrified of my own shadow till I drowned myself with training and hate.
"I… was raped." Itachi&Kisame said after calming herself down. "I never thought such an act could leave such an impression on someone… Though, it could be due to I was a guy before. Now… I can't even look at men without a knot forming in my stomach and feeling this creeping sensation as the memories come back. The only men I don't get it from is Naruto-kun, Nyanta-san, and Shiroe-san. Boys I don't get it from, but… how can I call myself a ninja now if I am afraid of men?" Itachi&Kisame let out a weak chuckle, taking another sip of her coffee to try and calm herself down..
"Jab them in the nuts." Sasuke bluntly said, making Itachi&Kisame spilt out her coffee and choke. "What? I mean, it worked for me."
"W-What the hell are you talking about?" Itachi&Kisame shouted, shocking Sasuke.
"I was scared just as deeply as you were now. I was even afraid of simple noises." Sasuke sighed, pouting. "So, to get over it, I always focused on ways to defeat you if you popped out from that noise and then I slowly found myself no longer afraid of the other things. Sure, the fear will never fully go away… I'm still afraid of being alone… But, it always feel better to be prepared for what would come even if it never happens. Though, I can never hate you anymore. You're my only sister, even if everyone else forgets. I forgiven you for what you done."
"Sasuke," Itachi&Kisame whispered, looking down.
Though, I guess we are still siblings and connected, Sasuke thought, a slight smile on his face.
"Thank you!"
"Ack!" Sasuke yelped, not expecting a hug from his sister.
"Thank you so much! I-I don't deserve your kindness!" Itachi&Kisame sobbed, not noticing the annoyed look on Sasuke's face.
Was Nee-chan ever like this? This is… Wait a second. Sasuke thought, "Nee-chan, why is your name Itachi&Kisame in the status window?"
"Ah…" Itachi&Kisame quickly let go and played with her fingers. "I'm actually two people stuck in this body. My partner and I was spying on Naruto and when we saw everyone disappeared, we panicked and rush to find what happened… But, ended up stuck in one body as a result." Itachi&Kisame sulked, pouting.
Ah, so her personality fused with another person's? Sasuke sighed, "I see. Well, maybe now you won't be as emotionless as you were before."
"Was I really that bad?" Itachi&Kisame asked, frowning.
"Yep. I was sometimes shock when you went from your usually distance self to brother mode as I called it all the time when we were little," Sasuke chuckled, sipping his coffee.
[Got any coffee left?] Itachi&Kisame and Sasuke looked at each other than at the text box, all the color in their face draining. They looked up to find Naruto looking at them with tired eyes and rubbing his forehead.
"A-Ah, hi, Naruto-kun!" Itachi&Kisame chimed, forcing a smile on her face.
We're so freaking screwed, Sasuke thought, gulping in fear.
[Coffee! Yes!] Sasuke blinked, seeing Naruto grab the pitcher of coffee Itachi&Kisame brewed and a cup. [Oh, is it dark or lightly roasted?]
"It's black." Itachi&Kisame said, her voice trembling, "Ah, you're not mad?"
[Huh? Why would I be mad?] Naruto gave them a weird look, filling his cup halfway with coffee.
"Well, with how much we still have to do, we shouldn't really be in here to begin with." Sasuke said, deciding to bite the bullet. Better to face the wrath than to dodge it and get it worse.
[Nothing wrong pumping the veins with caffeine. Even I need help keeping going to get the job done.] Naruto hummed, pulling out several vials.
"Naruto-kun, what are you making?" Itachi&Kisame asked, Sasuke and her turning green as they saw him pour several potions into his coffee.
[Ultimate Fatigue Crusher, Elder Tales version. I would combined energy drinks with coffee all the time back in the old world. Found the sleep antidotes and boosting potions work pretty well here like them.] Naruto was about to take a sip of the now bubbling brown substance when Itachi&Kisame snatched it away.
"How the fucking hell have you NOT have a heart attack?" Itachi&Kisame shouted, managing to keep Naruto from getting his cup by keeping him back with her foot. "Every ninja knows that is way too much caffeine! Heck, even I used that to assassinate people sometimes if we know they have a poor heart! Also, how long have you been up straight? I know you didn't sleep last night."
"Ah…" Naruto blinked before making both siblings sweat as he counting his fingers. [Almost five days, I think with a slight nap here or there. This is a normal sudden work week for me when I was working just part-time concept work for Elder Tales and going to the academy.]
If that is part time, no wonder no one noticed you were missing when you quit the academy. Sasuke thought in horror. Even I can't stay up more than over 30 hours awake!
[Gimme gimme gimme my crusher! I got so much work to do still!] Naruto pouted, still trying to get his concation from Itachi&Kisame. [Meanie! Give it!]
"No. You need to go sleep." Itachi&Kisame scolded the blond. "You're going to kill yourself and revive at the Cathedral at this rate."
[I've done several weeks without much sleep before. This is nothing.] Naruto glared at Itachi&Kisame who was shocked for a moment before giving him a matching glare back.
Naruto, you are inhuman. Maybe you really are the devil. Sasuke thought in shock before hearing footsteps.
"Boss, are you-Oh, my." Shiroe frowned, seeing the scene before him. "What's going on?"
[She won't give me my drink!] Naruto pouted at the Enchanter while pointing at Itachi&Kisame.
"He needs to sleep. He's been up five days straight." Itachi&Kisame said, huffing while stopped the Druid with her foot.
"You two are acting like you're married." Sasuke was unable to keep from laughing with seeing Itachi&Kisame and Naruto looked at the Enchanter in absolute horror. "You're still married, too, so people might get the wrong idea."
"Wait. They really are married?" Sasuke asked, instantly stopping his laughing.
"Shit! I completely forgot!" Itachi&Kisame said, looking at Naruto. "How do you get divorce in this world?"
[The couple system is simple. All you had to do to get married was become a couple at the Cathedral. Divorce is just hitting the break up in the couple's menu.] Naruto sighed, putting his finger into the air to mess with his menus.
"Thank goodness. I rather not be married to you." Itachi&Kisame sighed, in relief. "But, why were you married to this character to begin with when it's technically you, too?"
"Boss did it for the bonuses," Shiroe answered, taking the coffee pot. "Oh, good. I need some caffeine, too. The couple system was a good system for extra status bonuses if the two dating or married at the highest levels partied together. However, it isn't used much anymore with other items outstripping the bonuses of that system. But, Boss kept using it since he is usually using Itachi&Kisame with Boss more than Hokage"
"Okay. Rather Boss than being married to Hokage-sama. Even if he is now young looking." Itachi&Kisame sighed, glaring at her brother who was snickering. "Huh? Naruto-kun, what's wrong?" Sasuke looked up, seeing Naruto's mouth opening and closing like a fish.
"Boss, what's wrong?" Shiroe asked before smirking, "Don't tell me you can't break up now that it's a reality?"
"You want a trip to the Cathedral." Shiroe stepped back from Itachi&Kisame who glared at him. "I'll gladly rip you up with Samehada."
"You're oddly moody, Nee-chan," Sasuke sighed, "Maybe you're the one who needs to sleep."
"I actually would agree on that. I been making patterns and clothing nonstop for two days for Log Horizon's part of Santa's Workshop." Itachi&Kisame sighed before all three saw Naruto stiffly shaking his head no. "Oh, good, please break up this marriage."
[CAN'T] Naruto gulped, his face pale.
"Ah, Boss, you alright?" Shiroe asked, Sasuke catching the worry in the mage's voice.
[I THINK I FIGURED OUT HOW NEW PLAYERS ARE SUPPOSE TO APPEAR OUTSIDE THE ONES WHO LOG IN.] Naruto had a creepy, freaked out grin on his face.
"How new players appear?" Itachi&Kisame asked while Sasuke saw Shiroe's face went red, "What does… No… Don't tell me… From Susukino?" Itachi&Kisame asked, her own face turning white.
I'm going to be an uncle and the father is a rapist? Sasuke thought, a blood thirsty smile appearing on his lips. "Naruto, does the screens you are looking at tell you who the father is? Seems I will still be an avenger." Sasuke weakly laughed. And whoever it is will wish death was permanent in this world once I get strong enough and go after him.
[No! It was not caused by what happened in Susukino!] Naruto recoiled from Sasuke. [I'm the father! The pregnancy was caused by an anniversary bonus turned into a real spell!]
"What does that mean?" Itachi&Kisame screamed, "How the hell can I be pregnant through a spell?"
"No way." Shiroe frowned, "The flavor text?"
[Yep. I saw the tags before, but I thought it was just the bonus! The couple system has several types of bonuses. The rarest one is the anniversary bonuses which take having to be a couple a full year to get. You need to pass a year to get the Marriage bonus and status. After that and the two marriage anniversary bonus, you begin gaining the Baby Stork Bonus, the most powerful bonus and it keeps getting stronger with each year. It's the only part of the couple system still good even after the extra content from the expansions.] Naruto sheepishly laughed. [Worse. Itachi&Kisame and I just hit a Triplet Baby Stork Bonus. It's no longer showing the bonus status, instead just the flavor text. "Congrats on bringing new life to the world. Blessed with three little ones to bring happiness into your life."]
"T-T-Triplets?" Sasuke grabbed Itachi&Kisame as her knees gave away and helped her sit down. "B-But, how are you sure? I don't think that is enough to confirm I am pregnant."
"No. It's the status buff that does." Shiroe said, making Sasuke focus on the status window. To his shock, he saw near Itachi&Kisame's bar a small box with a heart and a bag. "Health ailments like anemia will show now as status debuffs and buffs. Boss suffered anemia due to only eating ingredients till we found how to get flavor to our food."
[Also, it gives me a notice she is pregnant.] Naruto sighed, shaking his head. [I tried hitting the break up to see if it would cancel the pregnancy, but it won't allow me. I won't be able to break off the marriage till she has the kids.] Naruto slumped, not noticing Itachi&Kisame had gotten up and walked over to him.
"Na-ru-to-kun." Sasuke gapped when Itachi&Kisame grabbed Naruto by his robe like shirt and pulled him up to meet her face with perfect smile. "You're not breaking the marriage and leaving me to care for three kids. Right?" Itachi&Kisame cutely cocked her head, not hiding the fury in her voice.
[Hell no am I going to leave you in the care for the three kids! You killed your whole clan!] Naruto glared at Itachi&Kisame, [I'll be taking care of them. It's my fault for not paying attention to the menus and I take full responsible. You don't have to worry about to taking care of them at all.]
"This coming from a 12 year old who works himself ragged?" Itachi&Kisame asked, snorting as Naruto grabbed her own dress. "How am I going to be sure you don't forget them while busy with a hammer?"
"Ah, Sasuke-san, you might want to move away from the couple's spat." Sasuke nodded, slowly moving away from Itachi&Kisame and Naruto.
They are like Mom and Dad when they fought, Sasuke shivered, remembering all too well the rare times his mother and father fought. It was actually one thing the whole clan he came from completely avoid talking about. Especially after one training ground being completely destroyed due to one such fit.
"Itachi&Kisame-chan? Where are you?" Sasuke jumped, looking at the entrance to see Henrietta. "Oh, there you are, Shiroe, where are you… What did Boss-san did to my little Itachi&Kisame-chan to make her mad?"
"Ah. Just normal married couple's issues." Shiroe sighed, "Can you tell me how things are going in the final preparations for Crescent Burger?"
"We're ready to go. Let's just hope it works." Henrietta sighed, "Though, I'm wiped. Maybe you can spare Akatsuki or Itachi&Kisame? Maybe even Gaara-chan?" Henrietta gasped, faking a slight faint.
"Akatsuki is busy, but I might be able to spare her a little later," Shiroe said, "Oh, Boss, can't you stop fighting with your wife and tell me how far Santa's Workshop is from opening up to the public?" Naruto and Itachi&Kisame blinked before blushing and letting the other go.
[We are almost ready.] Naruto stood up, stiffly saluting. [Finishing touches are being done today and stock has been prepared so we have stock for several days since Crescent Burger will be needing the supply chain in case they begin running out. Here's the vouchers for finalization signatures and such.] Naruto pulled out a large pile of papers from his magic bag and handing them to the Enchanter.
"Good. Plus, what work do you have left? You really do look like you need to sleep." Shiroe sighed, Sasuke noticing the bags under Naruto's eyes and pale appearance.
[Still got a lot to do. I still have to properly bound volume 3 of Hidden Village Hero, beta volume 4, and finish the inking on volume 5. That's just on Hidden Village Hero. I also need to make more copies of the quest forms as the NPCs have been coming to ask about quests with only one day of handing out the NPC only advertisement flyers. Also got to prepare the invoices and other paperwork so we can keep all of Santa's Workshop going and craft small freebies gifts for the customers who come for the grand opening for the stand I am running.] Naruto sighed, [Wait, where did you put my Fatigue Crusher?] Naruto glared at Itachi&Kisame who whistled and pointed at the sink with a bucket under it. [NO! MY FATIGUE CRUSHER!] Naruto cried over the sink, mourning the loss of his drink.
"You really are his wife." Shiroe sighed, making Itachi&Kisame glare at him with a red face. "Though, I'll handle it, Boss. Give all the apprentices a break as well. They are going to need the rest since Santa's Workshop and Crescent Burger are opening up tomorrow."
[But, the work! It needs to be finished and you still got paperwork to do!] Naruto sobbed, still crying over his fallen drink.
"And I am started to get how Elder Tales had no problem overworking you like a mangaka." Shiroe sighed, "Rest. Or you could bicker with your wife more."
[Can you not joke about that?... Ah, wait, how are kids born here? Especially since this is a spell induced pregnancy?] Henrietta's face lit up red as Sasuke looked to see her reaction to the news.
"Ah… I have no clue…" Shiroe said, his one face turning pink. "L-Let's inform the other guild masters and see if we have anyone with the doctor or physician subclass as well as maybe someone who was a doctor in the real world. Ah, also, we have no idea what will happen if you are sent to the Cathedral while pregnant, so you'll be off any battle required quests, Itachi&Kisame."
"I understand." Itachi&Kisame sighed before freezing with Henrietta hugged her.
"Boss! You're a horror! I did not know you are a pedo-creep!" Henrietta growled at Naruto, glaring at him while holding onto Itachi&Kisame.
"Ah… Naruto-kun is 12. My age is technically 18 and 29, so technically my combined age is 47 and the cougar in this relationship," Itachi&Kisame chuckled with Henrietta instantly let her go and recoiled in horror at her. "Ah, I do enjoy this lovely youth, especially with nice man like Naruto-kun." Itachi&Kisame chimed, smirking with seeing the lolicon moving further away.
Seems Itachi&Kisame found her Anti-Lolicon Shield, Sasuke sighed before seeing Naruto shaking his head. "You alright, Naruto?" Sasuke asked, noticing Naruto was a bit in a daze.
[Yeah. That damn cold is still around, though I am thankful my nose is no longer stuffed up.] Naruto sighed, [Maybe I do need some rest.]
"Idiot!" Naruto yelped with getting his ear pulled by Itachi&Kisame. "If you're still sick, why are you not in bed and resting."
[I'm fine. It's not like I'm going to re] Naruto collapsed onto the ground, the text body barely forming before disappearing..
"Naruto! You alright?" Sasuke shouted, kneeling down next to Naruto. He moved the man's bangs and saw Naruto's face flushed and he was breathing hard.
"He really is relapsing from the cold!" Henrietta said in shock. "Is there a bed nearby we can get him in?"
"Yes. His room is still in here." Shiroe said before hearing the door slam open.
"Hey! Is there a bed in here?" A man shouted, Sasuke's eyes widen with seeing Gaara in his arms. The young red head was wheezing and flush like Naruto.
"Gaara, too?" Shiroe said before his eyes widen. "Henrietta, call Maryelle and have her check on Rin. This might not be Naruto's cold relapsing."
"On-Oh, Maryelle, I was about to-Rin has collapsed as well. What is going on?" Henrietta said, just shocked of the situation.
"All three of them are human sacrifices. This could be backlash from the beasts dying and their HP and MP given to them." Shiroe said, taking Gaara from the man's hands. "Can you get Boss and move him into the other room? Henrietta, tell Maryelle to have your guild look after Rin. I have no idea where this illness is going to go, so we need to keep an eye on them."
"Roger." Henrietta said, nodding as the man went to Naruto and picked him up by the arm.
"Let me help." Sasuke said, helping to keep Naruto from moving around. Tailed beast? Ah, that's right, Naruto did mentioned he had the Fox sealed in him before. But I thought he was joking. Sasuke thought before closing his eyes while walking with Naruto. He found the colors of everyone's MP showing and Naruto and Gaara's MP was clearly moving oddly. It is their MP. It's really rough. But, why? Don't tell me they are sick because of it going weird...And, if it is making them sick, will it hurt them as well? Sasuke thought, opening his eyes with worry as they reached the makeshift bedroom.
I don't want to lose my brother-in-law. Sasuke thought before finding his vision suddenly shifted. "Huh?" Sasuke gasped before his own body gave out on him.
"Hey! Kid! You alright?" Sasuke heard, hitting the ground and unable to move.
What? Sasuke closed his eyes, My MP is also weird… Is it contagious? Sasuke thought, hearing his name being called before his lost consciousness.
Endnote: A rare endnote, though since I now exposed it, wanted to put this bit in before the flames happen(don't mind these flames considering the person pregnant is technically two guys). I put in this lovely bun in the oven plot twist with my own experience with Dating Systems in MMORPGs, especially Eden Eternal where it's a rare one where you can have same sex couples(at least, last I was on). I've gotten random requests for dates in such games and it drives me what the walls, especially when my plot bunnies bring up the possible problems the special effects would do if the game became reality. Magic and real world logic really doesn't go hand to hand. If game mechincs mix in, then it kind of gets scary, especially with how more and more MMORPGs are adding various love related systems in. However, don't write this off as the writer wanting a pairing to have kids for the fun of it. This pregnancy has a purpose as it will be exploring one side of romance people nowadays don't see much in anime or even normal television shows. One that a short anime called "I Can't Understand My Husband is Saying" does it perfectly and somehow still get in deep meaning and emotions in episodes only spanning 3-4 minutes long. Can't wait for season 2 of that to come out. Naruto and Itachi&Kisame's relationship will be more of the type fitting for the setting of Elder Tales. And bring some comedy along instead of all the drama. Hope you all have a great day. Auto out.