A\N: As promised. And thanks to those who are reading and reviewing. Don't forget that we love to hear what you think, it keeps us writing.

Chapter Thirteen - Day Nine, Early morning

I can feel the sun on my face but it does not warm me, in fact the only part of my body that does not have the familiar unshakable chill is my left hand, which seems to be encased in something. I open my eyes, more confused than alarmed and smile at the sight before me.

Wheeler is sitting by my bedside, his head is on my bed and he is fast asleep. He is also holding my hand, which is why it is warm. I wish he were up here holding the rest of me… Even knowing that I was just thinking about being warm, the image of him tucked up beside me is not one I will be able to shake for a while. I blush and I am glad that he is still asleep.

It is still early so I let him sleep for a while longer, we have some time before we need to get ready. He is smiling so I guess he is having a pleasant dream. My own slumber was dreamless but considering the nightmares I was having, I will settle for peace.

I had better wake him before my grandmother comes in, she may not appreciate him being here all night, though he did sleep on the floor.

"Wheeler." I call quietly, while stroking his soft ginger hair with my free hand.

He makes a contented sound in his throat as he begins to stir. It must be a really good dream, I wish I did not have to wake him yet.

"Oh Yankee," I sigh sadly, and as he opens his eyes. "You have done it again. Fallen asleep in an uncomfortable position for my sake. I did not mean for you to have to stay here all night. Just until I fell asleep, and I ended up falling asleep before you returned anyway,"

"I know…but I was gonna stay with you a little longer. Then I noticed your hands were cold…so I tried to warm them up. I guess I fell asleep." He explains.

"How is your neck?" I ask, allowing my fingers to leave his hair and trail downwards to the base of his neck.

"Uh…it's fine." Is that regret I hear in his voice? Does he want another massage? I am willing…

I leave my hand on his neck as I say. "I am sorry I had to wake you, but it is getting late and we need to get ready for the funeral."

"Yeah. How long have you been up?" He is still coming to, I think.

"Not long." I reply. "I was just giving you as much time as possible to sleep. I know this has been a long, tough trip for you,"

"Tough for me? What about you? I'm fine. Don't worry about me," He pulls away and stands up. I think maybe I hit a nerve.

I get up and stand in front of him, wanting to put my arms around him but not being able to get over my inhibitions. "I do worry about you though…burdening you with my troubles and problems."

"Hey hey hey…I don't wanna hear that. You're not burdening me. You're my friend and your problems are my problems," He puts his hands on my shoulders and I look down, suddenly embarrassed.

He gently tilts my chin up until our eyes meet. "Got it?"

"Da." I tell him and raise my hands to rest them on his sides, showing him I want him there.

"Good," He says and leans down until our foreheads are touching.

The gap between our lips is so small, if I tilted my head slightly we would come together but I cannot. I have never been open with my feelings, never forward… I need him to make the first move. For the first time ever I wish he had Ma-Ti's power, normally that would be far too embarrassing but right now I only have my eyes to communicate what I want, and I do not think it is working.

Instead he gives me a quick kiss on my forehead. It is nice… any contact with him is nice, but I am wondering if it is possible to be too much a 'friend'. I am also wondering if he does not find me attractive anymore, I could not blame him, I am a mess but…

"I better go get ready. Come get me when you're finished." He is already half way to the door.

"Okay," I reply trying to keep the disappointment out of my voice. I guess it works, he normally says when he can tell there is something wrong, or maybe he can tell and just does not want to go there.

Is this because of what Kwame said about taking advantage of me, or does he really want to be just friends?

I sigh and walk over to my bag to get my washing things, but as I move, my oversized sweatpants start to fall down and I grab them quickly, trying not to trip over the long legs. I had been dubious when the Yankee gave them to me with the sweatshirts, but it was so cold last night when I got undressed that I was glad I had brought them with me.

It is still too cold to take them off, even though I have my normal pyjamas on underneath, so I hitch them up over my sock covered feet and wrap over the excess at my waist, holding it in place.

As I enter the hallway I hear my grandmothers voice calling me and I turn to face her. "Good morning Grandmuska." I say shyly, not quite meeting her eyes.

"Wheeler is in the bathroom." She tells me.

I nod, still looking at the floor. "I know, but he must be nearly done, I was going to wait outside."

"Linka moya." she says softly, her voice full of warmth, and when I gather up enough courage to look at her, I see she is holding out her arms to me.

"I am so sorry Grandmuska!" I sob, dropping my things on the floor and moving into her embrace.

She hugs me and pats my back, though I am a little too tall now, it is still comforting. "Hush Little Bird, you have nothing to be sorry for."

After a few minutes, holding my arms, she pushes me away far enough to look at me. "No more tears now Linka we..." Her voice trails off and her expression becomes vaguely disgusted.

Her look turns severe and I wonder what the matter is. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

The weight loss! The drugs! But... "I thought Wheeler told you?"

"Not only did he not tell me, he obviously lied to me!" She says becoming annoyed.

But she was there for his outburst at my Uncle ... wasn't she? Did I imagine it all? I am beginning to feel dizzy, I have never liked her being mad at me and I am not sure I can cope with it today. "He would not lie to you." I venture. "Perhaps he played it down a bit to not worry you, though I thought he said..."

"Played it down?" She asked. "He said he was not your boyfriend!"

I am confused. "He is not."

"Then how did you end up in his clothes?" Her expression has darkened even more.

I look down at my oversized nightwear and I cannot help the tiny giggle that escapes me. I am incredibly embarrassed, but I am also very relieved that it is only that she is angry about. "He gave it to me because I was cold."

The disbelief on her face surprises and hurts me, I have never lied to her!

"You were brought up in one of the coldest places on Gods Earth and you need to borrow an Americans clothes to keep warm?" she demands.

Da? "Until... Until now I have always been too hot on Hope Island." I try to explain. "I have no warm things there except my out door clothes which is not comfortable to sleep in." In this I speak from experience.

"You are not on hope island now." she persists, "And you have lost enough weight to get into a child's clothes so do not tell me that you have out grown them. Or you could have asked me, or borrowed something of your brothers!"

Why is she so annoyed? I wish she would keep her voice down, if Wheeler hears her he will come out and there will be another argument... "Grandmuska please I... last night I did not even think about it, I was too tired..."

I see her brow furrow, I cannot tell what she is thinking but something is plainly disturbing her. "Tell me honestly Linka, what is your relationship with that young man?"

Bozhe'moy! Did she have to ask that? I cannot lie to her, but I cannot tell the truth either... I am not even sure I know the answer. "We are friends."

"Just friends?" I nod but I feel guilty and I know she sees it in my eyes so I try to clarify it, probably making it worse. "Good friends."

In her eyes I see suspicion. "The kind of friends, that I hear now, they say is with benefits?"

I am shocked. Truly shocked, that she would think that about me, and even a little shocked that she has heard it at all. "Nyet!" I yell at her and to my acute mortification, Wheeler hears.

He comes running out of the bathroom, still wet from the shower in nothing but a towel, and immediately pulls me to him. "What's wrong? What's happened Babe?"

I clutch his arm but address myself to Grandmuska, still talking in my native tongue so that my American friend will not understand. "I would never do that! Why would you think something like that about me?"

Her eyes narrow. "Never? He could not persuade you for… for anything?"

I swallow. She means drugs and I know it. I also know that that was how some of the girls back in Washington were getting their Bliss when they ran out of money. It terrifies me to wonder what would have happened if Skumm had decided to cut me loose… I tell myself 'never', that I would have died first… but in the middle of the night when I am alone, I wonder what I would have done for Bliss.

When I am awake I am sure that I could not have lived with doing something like that, not without the Bliss clouding my mind, nor could I ever have accepted Wheelers help… but sometimes in my nightmares I think I remember things, things that my Blissed-out brain made me forget...

"I would not do that." I say in a small voice, meeting her eyes and hoping she can see the truth. "I did not do it while I was on Bliss and I would not do it now." Then a little stronger I add something that I am sure of. "And he would never try to persuade me for any reason other than my liking him."

I am perfectly convinced of that last. He, I think, would not lack for partners back in America… did not perhaps. When we first moved to Hope Island, Gi and I had a girl's afternoon and for a laugh we 'discussed' the boys… we even made a bet. She would not admit it now but she was certainly impressed by Wheeler physically and sometimes I think that if he had picked her, she would not have turned him down.

Wheeler is looking between Grandmuska and I and wondering what is going on. He is gripping me protectively and I make no move to get away from him, but he has not started shouting so I guess he does not think she would have done something to deliberately upset me.

I see a moment of indecision on my grandmothers face and then it clears of everything but remorse. "I do not think of you like that Linka moya, I am sorry, I do not know why such an idea should enter my head."

She holds her arms out to me again and I look up at Wheeler and smile. "It is okay Yankee, it was just a misunderstanding. I am fine."

He is still in over-protective mode and I cannot blame him, but he obediently releases me so that I can hug Grandmuska. "Go and finish your wash Wheeler." I give him encouraging smile. "It is just girls stuff."

He raises an eyebrow at that but says "I won't be long." and then with one last look, heads back into the bathroom.

I watch his receding figure with interest, before remembering where I am, and my face is burning as I turn back to my grandmother. "We are just friends, but I... that is I... well we..."

She shakes her head sadly. "It is not necessary for you to explain Linka, it is just a foolish old woman sorry to see her grand daughter grow up, especially when we are so far apart. But you are not a child anymore."

I know there is more to it than that, perhaps one of our neighbours commented on our relationship yesterday. It would not surprise me, they have always liked to gossip.

"I am still your grand daughter." I tell her. "And if I knew the answer I would tell you... but please do not think bad things about him, he is being so good to me, and he has not, would not, ask for anything in return."

"I know. I can see, he is a good man and I am indebted to him for keeping you safe. Forgive me Little Bird?" I can tell that she means it so I hug her again, greatly relieved.

It took me an hour to get myself looking presentable and even then I am worried about what Wheeler will think. I need to get over this, I am going to my cousins funeral not dressing for a date… but his opinion does matter to me.

"Come in," Oh well, too late to turn back now.

I enter his room and he turns and smiles at me. "Hey Babe…you look nice."

I am ridiculously relieved, and he is not lying because I can see it in his eyes. "Thank you. So do you." I am not lying either.

"Thanks. And your timing is perfect. I hope you know how to tie a neck tie cuz my Ma usually did that for me and I haven't had to wear a suit since…" He pauses and his next words wipe the smile from my face. "James' funeral."

"Oh," I feel terrible! How could I forget about his cousin? I cannot believe how selfish I have been to ask him to come with me. "I am sorry."

"It's okay…" He shrugs. "Wanna hear somethin' funny?"

I drag him back through one of the worst experiences of his life and he is trying to make me feel better? Bozhe'moy! I raise my eyebrows sceptically, but wanting him to continue.

"I wore the same suit to James' wedding as I did his funeral! THAT'S how often I actually wear a suit!"

Oh Yankee, that is not funny, it is tragic! I give him a small smile in acknowledgement of his attempt at humour but I want to cry.

"So…can you help me out with my tie or not?" He persists.

"Da. I can do your tie for you." I nod and move to stand in front of him.

He gives me his cutest lopsided grin. "Thanks."

"It is the least I can do." I tell him, taking the tie.

I have not done this since before Mishka left for University and I did not do it much then, so I am badly out of practice and need to concentrate. Unfortunately that is easier said than done, I am dressing Wheeler! Okay it is only a tie but he is taller than me so I have to stand close to him and reach around him, and it cannot be done without contact.

Helping Mishka did not feel like this, it always put me in mind of looking after a small child, despite his being older than me. This is different though and I find myself imagining that I am sending my husband off to work. I suppose Wheeler would not appreciate that image, I do not think he is the marrying kind, especially as he is just eighteen!

He is staring at me! I am not looking at him but I can feel his gaze. Our faces are so close together and his hands are resting lightly on my hips, either because he is trying to steady me as I reach up, or because he does not know what else to do with them while I am standing right in front of him. I am very, very aware of him.

Got it! I smile at my achievement and lean forward again to tidy his collar, making the mistake of looking up at him... We are barely an inch apart!

I quickly look down and smooth his tie by running my hand down his chest, I am not moving away though. "All done."

He checks my handiwork in the mirror and I follow his gaze. He does look very handsome all dressed up and I cannot take my eyes from him.

"Thanks Babe," He says as he tucks his arm around my shoulders, pulling me against his side.

I reciprocate by slipping my arm around his waist and we stay like that looking at our reflection... We make a handsome couple, and even I do not look so bad now that I have made up my face and fixed my hair. Of course my black dress would be too loose if I did not have several layers on underneath, but since it is even colder here than on Hope Island it is not a problem.

If it were any other occasion I would say that I would like a picture of us like that, but the illusion of everything being alright cannot last, and I feel the need to talk before it gets awkward. "Why is it that women know how to tie neckties, but they do not wear them, and yet men do not know how to tie them, although they are the ones that wear them?"

He thinks for a moment and then answers. "Easy," He tells me, taking my hand and placing my palm against his. "Your hands are smaller therefore your fingers are more nimble and can manoeuvre the material of the tie around better."

"Oooooh, is that it?" I say, my amusement showing in my eyes as well as my voice.

"Yep," he says smugly, lacing our fingers together, and then adds. "Well, that and the fact that women are smarter than men."

That makes me laugh aloud, and I play along happily. "So you FINALLY admit it?"

"Only to you Babe," He says squeezing my hand, but he sounds sad and I see the regret in his eyes as he asks. "Ready to go?"

"Ready as I will ever be," I sigh, and he leads me towards the door.

To Be Continued…

And don't forget, to get the full affect of the story, you HAVE TO read Wheeler's side of the story in Chapter 13 of Becks7's Co-Dependents