A/N: Just wanted to say thanks to those who have been posting reviews. It really does make me want to keep going knowing that some of you are reading and enjoying it. Feel free to drop a review if you haven't yet. It helps.
Sophie flopped her head back on the bed exhausted. She couldn't wipe the lazy grin off her face as she looked toward Sian beside her. They had moved from the beach to a hotel nearby. It wasn't the classiest place, but if Sian was pulling her, then Sophie had to go.
"You're still so amazing" Sophie said with genuine wonder. She had thought that she would never feel this way again. Don't get her wrong, it wasn't like she was celibate, but there was a difference when emotions this deep were involved. It made it more special.
"Myeh" Sian giggled nudging closer. "Well we were always good at that" Sian said running her hands thru her hair. Sophie placed her hands on Sian's hips. She knew that Sian was sensitive there. It had always been easy for them to be intimate like this. She had missed having the blond close to her every night. It had been hard to get over. Sian ducked her head into the other girl's chest, resting her head over Sophie's heart. Neither spoke being caught up in the moment.
Sophie ran her hand across the appendix scar that still remained on Sian's stomach. "I remember this" she whispered as her finger lightly graced over it. "I'll have it forever" Sian said breathing slowly. Sian turned back over and buried her face in the pillow. Sophie sighed in frustration.
"Well I have my own now" she sat up and showed Sian her bare back. The scars from her back surgery weren't stark but you could still see them. Sian gasped then traced her hands down them softly. "Where did you get those?" Sian asked a bit shocked. Sophie turned back around to face her.
"The car accident. It's a long story" Sophie shuddered a bit just thinking about it.
"Tell me" Sian urged.
"Oh it was stupid. I pushed someone out of the way of a car on a busy street. Silly beggar was high on drugs and dodging cars in the road" Sophie related.
"Did you know who it was?" Sian asked.
"Ryan" Sophie said reluctantly.
Sian let out a sound of disgust. "Ugh! Again! How many times can one man cause so much trouble?" Sian said exasperatedly.
"Yeah I know" Sophie shrugged. "I didn't know if I'd ever walk again for a while there, it was touch and go. Lost a lot of weight, I'll never run a 5K. But he's been a good mate since, and I forgave him for it" Sophie finished.
"You would Soph" Sian sighed. She reached out and placed her hand on Sophie's chest.
"You're willing to forgive everyone" Sian spoke looking at her directly as they sat up facing each other. "Soph, I know that you feel that we came apart because you cheated and didn't tell me, but it wasn't the kiss that hurt. It was that you gave up on us before that. We told each other everything Soph. I trusted you, but you didn't trust me" Sian had wound herself up. She had clearly had a lot of time to think about this. Sophie sighed. She had been dreading this, but it was what she had come to LA for. It still hurt though.
"Again I said I'm sorry. I'll never be more sorry" Sophie pleaded.
"I know! I know Sophie. But have you forgiven yourself?" Sian asked. "Because I think that you don't think that you deserve to be happy, and you do Sophie. Everyone does" Sian reached out and pulled Sophie closer. They touched foreheads for a moment. She was so close that Sophie could feel every short breath. Both girls were panting and Sophie's heart felt as if it would leap out of her chest.
She crashed her lips against Sian's desperately. It got heated quickly as each girl battled for dominance, trying to control all the emotions that were bouncing around them. It was Sian who broke it off. Sophie felt as if she had been torn away. Her body burned.
"I love you. I still love you" Sophie confessed.
"I never stopped…But I can't trust you with my heart…I just can't" Sian said turning away. "I've heard that you accept the love that you think you deserve. And Sophie you deserve it all. You just don't believe it" Sian said. She climbed out of bed and headed to the adjoining bathroom.
Sophie closed her eyes. She gave it a good long thought. Was Sian right? It made sense. All her life she had been invisible hidden behind Rosie. Course her parents loved her; they had to, even when you cause them the most trouble. It was really Sian who was the first to know her, to love her without that family baggage. But had she felt that she deserved it? Had she not told her about the money and Amber because she was terrified that it would confirm her belief that she wasn't good enough for Sian? Because nobody could fancy Sophie. Not really.
She got up and found Sian washing up at the outside sink. Sophie wrapped her arms around the other girl's waist, resting her head on her shoulder. Sian leaned back into her sighing. "Soph" she whispered. "I've missed you" Sophie whispered as she nuzzled her neck. They stood there for a moment. Lost in each other, knowing that it was all nearly over.
Sian was the first to pull away. She went to grab her dress, which had been discarded from the moment that had entered the room.
Sophie sat down on the bed watching her. She was trying as hard as she could to stop time with her mind. It wasn't working.
"Don't look so sad Soph. We both knew how this would end" Sian said as she went to grab her shoes. She went to sit down beside her. Sophie's eyes were fascinated by the hotel carpet. She didn't want to look into Sian's eyes. This wistful sadness was just too hard to take.
"Hey" Sian lifted up her chin. Sophie was near tears. "Hey, babe" she pulled Sophie into a hug. "I just…" Sophie sputtered into her shoulder.
"Soph, come on. It's going to be okay. Everyone always said that we were too young to be feeling this way. And maybe they were right. I'm only 20. I've got so much more to do. And so do you. I mean do you even know what you want to do? You're so much smarter than working in a corner shop in Weatherfield. And there's so many other fit women who would be lucky to have you love them" Sian reassured her.
"What about Forever?" Sophie said so softly that it was a whisper.
"If that's the way it's meant to be, than maybe it's still true. You always say that things happen for a reason. So come on, before this gets too soppy. Let's go" Sian said as she held up Sophie's skirt. Sophie took it with a sad grin.
"What's with the long face?" Sian flashed a grin. Sophie couldn't resist it. She had to grin back.
It was hard but she had to be practical-like. They could only sit in their bubble for so long. It was time for real life to creep back in.
As Sophie got dressed and Sian drove her home she was lost in her own thoughts. Sophie and Sian had traded numbers. Maybe they could be friends again. They had started out that way an all. Sophie knew that Sian had forgiven her. It was time for Sophie to do the same.
"Soph, who do you want to be?" Sian point blank asked her.
Sophie didn't have an answer. She just shrugged.
"Y'know who used to help you figure things out when I couldn't?" Sian pointed out.
Sophie knew exactly whom Sian was referring to. She nodded.
"I'll go talk to her, I swear" Sophie assured her.
Sian pulled up to Hayley's apartment to drop her off. It was late but it looked like Hayley was still up to let her in. She would want to hear all the details, Sophie was positive.
They sat in the car looking at each other.
"Come on. This isn't the end of us, I'm sure. I'm so happy that you came to find me" Sian said pulling her in for an embrace. Sophie nodded, some tears started to fall. "Oh Soph! Stop crying you silly mare. You know there's no other woman but you for me" Sian said wiping tears from her own cheeks.
They pulled apart. Sophie smiled as she got out of the car. She watched as Sian drove away.