"Do you understand?"

The boy ran his stubby fingers through his dirty hair and shook his head. Antonio was getting more and more frustrated with the kid. "Listen carefully. Alright? Because if you screw this up, you won't be getting any of your money. Take this letter to Barcelona. I want you to go on this horse right here, then come back with a response from this man. See this name on this envelope? Ludwig. Yes? You see? And here is a map of Barcelona. I know, I know. It's rough. I didn't have much time, but this map will get you to where you need to go. Give him the letter and come back with the horse. Got it, niño?"

"I'll need a downpayment, mister."

Antonio squinted slowly at the scrawney boy and said, "Tell you what. You go do this favor for me. Correctly. And if you do it right and come back to me with a response, I'll give you the money AND the horse." He definitely wouldn't have given up his own horse. This was some black horse he had managed to steal days before. He wasn't going to lend some peasant that he didn't know his horse. He was trying to be good, not stupid. The boy tapped his foot and huffed.

"Okay, well what if I just take the horse and don't come back?"

Antonio's nostrils flared and before he knew it, he was grabbing the boy by the shoulders. "You listen to me, dammit. If you aren't back in three days time, I'm turning you in as that Lovino Vargas boy. And who do you think they're going to believe? You? You're nothing. Got it? I'm giving you a chance to be someone with this money, idiota. Take my deal or I'll have you hunted down and killed. I didn't want to speak so plainly, but it seems I have no choice. Do we have a deal?"

Antonio, of course, wouldn't really have the boy hunted down. He would definitely be pissed if he didn't come back with a response, but he had no power to kill anyone anymore. Besides, he didn't want to.

The boy was nodding frantically now, though he scowled faintly as he shoved the letter into his back before hopping on the smallish horse. "Fine. It's a deal."

.

L.B.,

I need to ask a large favor of you. I do not want to argue with you and I do not want you to ask me why it must be this way. Please just trust me.

I'm coming back to Barcelona on October 30th. Tell me where you are so that I may meet you. I need you to turn me in. I'm sure you re-read that sentence as if you had read it wrong the first time, but you didn't. Don't ask me why you have to do this. You just do. Please. It is the only way I can save Lovino.

I have a plan. A good one. Trust me. Help me. We'll talk more once I arrive. Please respond as soon as you receive this letter. Send the response back with the messenger.

~Antonio F. Carriedo

Ludwig had already sent a letter back, but he couldn't stop reading Antonio's note and wondering what that crazy bastard was planning.

"What's that, Ludwig?" Feliciano peeked over Ludwigs shoulder to catch a glimpse of the letter. Ludwig shook his head. "It is nothing, Feliciano," he said, tossing the letter into the fireplace. Feliciano smiled and scooted closer to Ludwig, who watched the Italian curiously.

"I don't know why you still keep things from me. Just tell me something," Feliciano said. He was playing with one of Ludwigs hands, tossing it back and forth between his own palms. Ludwig didn't even try to pull away. Feliciano's touches were inevitable.

"Antonio needs help. I do not know much. That is all I can tell."

"You don't like talking, Luddy."

"Please do not call me that."

.

Two Weeks Later . . .

"What are you doing?"

"What do you mean, Lovi?"

"I mean you haven't slept here with me since last time we did . . . that." Lovino buried his face into Antonio's damp chest and pulled the blankets up further.

"I thought you were angry still, querido. I wanted to give you some time to cool off." Antonio wrapped his arms around Lovino, who had little goosebumps running down his chest and arms. His nose was light red along with his cheeks.

"I mean, you really pissed me off. But I think I might have overreacted. I know my decision has upset you. And I'm really s-sorry." Antonio's eyebrows furrowed as he felt sticky, warm tears smearing across his chest. He looked down at the Italian and let out a nervous chuckle. "It's alright. Everything's going to be alright, mi amor. You're such a brave man."

Lovino laughed bitterly at the comment.

"I look like I'm fucking 12. I don't think I look like a man, exactly, but thanks."

Antonio shook his head and kissed Lovino's messy hair. "You're a handsome young man. I do not care what is on the outside so much as I care about what is on the inside. I'm not with you for what I see. I'm with you for what I feel and can make you feel. Does that make sense?"

There was a soft cry. "Y-Yes but I'd like you to stop thinking things like that. You can't stay with me for much longer. Let me go when I leave. Okay? It p-pisses me off, but find someone else," Lovino said. The tears were falling freely now, soaking a spot on the bed. Antonio kissed each tear that threatened to fall after that. "No, I don't think so, Lovino. I'll always be with you. No matter where you are. And you'll always be with me. Remember that no matter what happens when you leave next week, we'll meet again someday. Someplace that's far better than here, too."

Lovino nodded and dried his tears with the back of his hand. "O-Okay. Thank you, Antonio. I love you."

Antonio buried his face into Lovino's hair, trying hard to memorize how good it felt to be holding Lovino in his arms. "I love you, too."

.

A note was written and placed on Lovino's pillow. The sun hadn't quite risen yet, but it was getting significantly lighter. Antonio grabbed his things, which he probably didn't need, and looked down at Lovino one last time.

He would never see him again. But it was worth it. He wasn't the man he once was. He was the man Lovino loved and nothing less. He would die as that man, too, happily, as long as it saved Lovino. He hovered over the Italians sleeping form and took in a deep breath.

He wanted to remember everything about him for as long as he could. His scent, his form, his voice. He almost pressed a last kiss to his cheek, but he couldn't risk waking him. So he gave a soft smile that went unnoticed instead. "Goodbye," he whispered.

.

Barcelona was just as he had left it. Dirty and cold. It was misty today and the skies were dark grey. Antonio's lips were dry, his face was numb, and he couldn't feel his feet at all in his boots. He was glad when Ludwig opened his door right away and pulled him inside. Antonio sat in front of the fire instinctively and closed his eyes as the smell of dried meat and burning wood spiked his senses. The warmth from the fire was incredible. He could hear little shuffles of feet behind him before two arms were resting on his shoulders, pulling him into an awkward hug.

"Antonio, how are you? How are Lovi and Grandpa Roma? You must be hungry, oh! Hold on. Here!" Feliciano handed him a slice of bread and some sort of meat he'd never seen before, but right now, he didn't care. He ate the food, motioning for something to wash it down with before he answered Feliciano's questions, which he was still rapidly asking.

"Do they talk about me, Antonio? What is the plan you had? Ludwig told me about it, I'm sorry if it was secret. Are we moving away? Are you coming with us?"

Antonio took a large swig of bitter rum, grit his teeth, and swallowed the burning liquid in one gulp. "Feliciano, it is good to see you and Ludwig. Lovino and Roma will be safe if you follow my instructions. Though they aren't really for you. They're for Ludwig."

Ludwig, who had been awkwardly fiddling with the curtains, was now looking in Antonio's direction, eyebrows furrowed and mouth curled into a frown. "What is the plan? You are turned in and then?"

Antonio took one more swig, far bigger than the last. He had a feeling he'd need it. "I will explain, but do not interrupt me until I'm finished, please. I need you to turn me in and that is it. I will tell them that Lovino and Roma were caught stealing, hanged, and thrown into one of the rivers. Hopefully they will believe it. I have my story very straight. I'll be prepared for any question they throw at me. They will stop hunting for them and they will no longer have an excuse to kill so quickly, and hopefully, before they kill many more, this will be over or everyone targeted will find a way to escape Barcelona and start over again somewhere new. This is the only way that you, Feliciano, and your family can live peacefully. We have to fake their deaths. And maybe having me will be enough to satisfy their blood-lust. They can make an example of me as they please. You don't have to save me. You just have to turn me in and forget about it. Please."

There was only silence after Antonio finished speaking. Feliciano looked like he didn't understand and Ludwig looked like he'd seen a ghost. Antonio was the first to speak again.

"Take me to them, Ludwig. Today. I'm afraid I won't go through with it if I don't do it now. Tell them you found me trying to go back home for whatever reason. Be as vicious as you must. Feliciano cannot help you, though. Not this time. Please say you'll do it."

Feliciano opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again. He said nothing after realizing that this was a necessary measure. What could he say, anyway? He was willing to do almost anything to save his family. Ludwig still looked shocked, though. "There must be a way out from this, Carriedo," he said. He didn't sound sure. He almost sounded like he was pleading. "How can I have that on me? My . . . on my . . . "

"Conscience," Feliciano squeaked.

"On my concience," Ludwig finished.

Antonio bit into another piece of bread that he had helped himself to. Nobody stopped him. "Please. I can't have the death of the man I love and his grandfather on my hands. Will you help me? Yes or no?"

Ludwig made a noise like a sigh in his throat and turned to Feliciano, who had grabbed his hand. "Luddy, I know it's against everything you believe, but I don't think we have a choice. If they keep searching for Lovi and Grandpa Roma, they'll find them. This is a good plan."

"With a loss, Feliciano."

"Sometimes you have to lose something to gain something. Please, Ludwig. For me."

Ludwig stared blankly at the floor, pulled his hand out of Feliciano's, and nodded. "I do not want to and I want you to know this, Carriedo. Stand up. You want to go and we will go."

.

Mi amor,

You are the most beautiful man I have ever met, inside and out. I love you more than anything this world has to offer, and when I part from it, you will be the only thing I miss. I know we'll meet again someday, and that hope will never fail to lift me from my sadness, such as I feel while writing this to you.

I have gone back to Barcelona to turn myself in so that you don't have to. I have a plan, though, and it is a very good one. I know it will work. It will save your family and that is all you need to know. Though you may be safe, you cannot return to Barcelona but for one thing, which you must aquire very carefully. On the back of this letter is a map to my remaining "fortune", if you could call it that. It should be enough for you and your family to go back to Italy.

Find someone new to share your love with. Eat delicious food. Paint all of the beautiful things you come across.

Live the life you've always wanted to live, Lovi!

Yours In Eternity,

Antonio F. Carriedo

To Be Continued . . .