Chapter 8: Walking and Talking

The first ten minutes of walking was completely silent, with the exception of the ground crunching beneath our feet. Zane was never one to start conversation, so it was no surprise there, but Dimitri was being silent too. And Dimitri never shuts up.

'He must be angry still...I've never seen him hold a grudge though...and honestly if anyone should be angry here it's me, I'm the one who put myself out there...'

I shook away the thoughts. "How about we play a game?" I said, putting as much cheer into my voice as I could muster.

"Like what?" Dimitri asked, sounding bored. 'Maybe he's not angry...or maybe he's just really good at hiding it...'

Have to stop thinking about Dimitri. It's pointless. "Well we could play 'Would you Rather' again." I suggested.

"We did that for hours on the train." Dimitri complained.

Zane spoke up. "And Dimitri's turns always disturb me. What other games do you have?"

I thought about some that I played as a kid. Red rover, mother may I, red light green light, hide and seek...but all of them involved too much movement and I don't think we have time to deviate from our path. "Hmm...well we could just ask questions. It's not really a game, but it will help pass time on this seemingly endless walk."

"I'm down for it. Dimitri?" Zane asked politely.

"Fine. Ask your stupid question."

Dimitri's words hurt, but I did my best not to let them show. "If you could have any job in the entire world, from any species, what would it be and why?" I asked.

It was quiet a moment and Dimitri spoke first, "I'd be a firefighter. Because I could cheat at it with my demon powers and be the coolest person ever." He completely half-assed that. But whatever, at least he's talking now.

"Zane?" I asked.

Zane glanced over at me for a moment then back at the road. "I'd be a policeman. But not a crooked one like you see in television. I'd be fair and just, enforcing the laws so civilization doesn't become chaos. What about you?"

I smiled as I thought about it. "I'd be famous. Like an actress, a singer if I could magically have the talent. And I'd get to be paid to have fun for my job and do interviews and it'd be so cool! But I wouldn't be greedy with it either. I'd give free autographs and donate to tons of charities, maybe even make one of my own!"

Dimitri was quiet but Zane gave me a small chuckle. "If you could play one character for a tv show, but it's the only character you could ever play, what kind of character would you be?" Zane asked.

I've been dreaming of this my entire life so I didn't need a moment to think. "I'd be the perfect girl. You know, the one who is nice and friendly to everyone, who is funny and confident and charismatic. But the one thing she wouldn't be confident about would be music, and it was her passion, but she wasn't insecure about it either. Like she just loved it so much, but it was her own, and she kept it to herself because she didn't want the world to ruin what she loved most."

After my ramble it was quiet. Then Dimitri said, "I'd be the best friend. The character who is always just that, the best friend, the support character of the main ones who is always there for them when they need him, who always has their back. The guy who doesn't mess with anyone until they fuck with his friends, then he destroys them."

"You're already that guy, Dimitri." Zane said softly. "You're my best friend. You've always had my back. Even on this...crazy adventure, as you'd put it."

Dimitri glanced at me, then at Zane, then back down the path. 'He feels guilty...God, why can't I be more like that character I want to be? Like Anne? She'd know what to do...' "Hey, I just answered your question. You asked it. Be more specific next time. But first, answer it yourself. What character would you want to play?"

"I'd want to play the guy who knew everything. The one who has the world, love and life in general...just all figured out." It was quiet again. I think Dimitri and I were both waiting for more, but it never came. Zane looked at both of us, "What?"

Dimitri shrugged and I spoke up, "I don't know...it's just...you always seem to know the right answer to everything. So I guess it's weird hearing you say you don't have it all figured out. That you wish you did."

Zane nodded. "It's weird hearing the once so-cocky Leliana say she's insecure too. But this world...the human race itself...has everything all messed up, doesn't it?"

"Agreed." Dimitri said flatly. "Guessing it's my turn in this stupid question game. Um...what ends in the letters u-n-t and is a four letter word for a female?"

"Cunt?" Zane asked confused. Dimitri looked at me. 'Did he really just call me a cunt?'

My jaw dropped a bit. "What the fuck kind of question is that?"

Dimitri rolled his eyes and looked ahead. "You're both wrong. The answer was aunt. Your turn, Leliana."

"Oh come on, Dimitri. We aren't playing trivia questions, we're asking fun questions. Ask another." I argued. "And I said to call me Rose, remember?"

"It was fun to me. And when you came up with this whole stupid idea, you never said we had to ask deep, personal questions. So no. And Leliana is your real name, remember? So double no." 'God I can't believe I liked this jerk.'

"Stop arguing, children." Zane scolded. "I'll ask another question. If you could live anywhere on this planet, where would it be and why?"

I remembered asking Dimitri this same question on the plane ride. I looked at him, and he refused to look back, and remembered what he had said. It was a farm, where the three of us would live together, off the land. It was a beautiful dream... I awaited to see if he still felt the same.

Dimitri sighed. "A farm. Because I don't want to deal with people."

'I don't know what to think of that...does he hate people now because of me? Does he actually want to be alone?...focus, Rose.' "I'd say a small town or village. Where there are other people, but everyone is close and helps each other out. Somewhere pretty too, where winters aren't too long. I hate winter. What about you Zane?"

"Weirdly enough, I'd love to live in one of those big cities. Maybe Tokyo or Las Vegas. I wouldn't interact too much with people, but I enjoy watching them, and I think that'd be really fun. Plus, everything I could ever need I'd be able to get to within minutes. Whose next for a question?"

"Me." I volunteered, sick of Dimitri's negative attitude. "If you were trapped on a desert island but you could take three things with you, not including people, what would you take and why?"

"A knife, a bag of weed and a bottle of liquor." Dimitri answered. "The last two for a last hurrah and a knife to end myself."

I thought he was being a dick but Zane thought Dimitri was hilarious. He laughed. Like an actual, loud laugh. He laughed so hard his eyes started watering and he had to wipe away the tears. "Dimitri, enough with the joking around. What would you actually bring?"

"Bag of weed, lighter and a mcdonalds meal. The first two so I could get high, the mcdonalds meal for when I get the munchies. Then I'd swim off the island to the rejoin the rest of the world. You?"

It still sounded like a joke to me, but Zane took him seriously. Then I remembered how fast they can move and I realized...he actually probably could do just that and be okay. "I'd take a knife, bucket and a book. A knife and bucket for skinning my food or helping build shelter, the bucket to collect rain water since salt water is not to be consumed. And then a book for something to do."

See, that's a reasonable answer. "I'd bring a picture book of my family, a tarp and a knife. The picture book so I could remember people and have them to talk to, a tarp to collect water and to use for shelter and a knife to help hunt." I answered. "Dimitri, your turn. This time, I'd like you to ask a more specific question that has some meaning."

He glared at me. "Why the hell don't you just accept that you're Leliana and not Rose? Is that specific enough for you?" 'Ouch.'

"Dimitri." Zane said with a warning tone.

"No, she needs to face the facts. She's about to see the oracle and get her memories back and she knows all this yet she still wants to use her stupid human name. It's dumb. And that's coming from me, so that's a pretty powerful statement." Dimitri ranted, his anger flaring. 'Ouch times a thousand.'

"Dimitri, enough."

"No, Zane, it's fine." I said quietly. "He's right. You guys found me, yet even here with you I'm still trying to run. I'm trying to not be Leliana. To not be some demon princess in who knows what kind of trouble. And it's not because I'm scared, it's because I like being Rose. I like being human. And...I don't want my memories back. Even if it's just us three wandering around for the rest of our lives, going to bars or playing games, it's been...fun. And I don't want it to change."

They were both quiet. Dimitri was looking at the ground and Zane stared at me a moment. "You don't want to have to go back and be in charge of an entire species." Zane stated matter-of-factly. "Or be engaged to me."

'Shit. How the hell do I respond to that?' "No...I don't." I said softly, looking away from his gaze. "You're cold and quiet most of the time. Every now and then you break out and become a bit more fun, but even in those times, you're only a friend. I don't want to marry a friend I want to marry someone I'm in love with."

Dimitri snapped, "But you very well could be in love with him and not even know it because of your memories! So like it or not, Leliana, you're getting them back. You can stop being a bitch in the meantime."

My eyes watered and I breathed uneasily. "Dimitri, I appreaciate you trying to look out for me but you can stop." Zane said, his voice cold. "She was simply answering a question I asked. I expected nothing less. Let's move on, we're almost there."

The rest of the walk was in awkward silence. Zane was more distant than ever, gaze focused straight ahead at all times but if you looked in his eyes he looked like he was galaxies away. Dimitri was livid and ran ahead, leading the walk from the front, never looking back. And I just stumbled along, slowly getting more numb inside with each step.

'What a mess...'

Eventually, a castle appeared as the sun started to set. It was beautiful yet intimidating at the same time.

"Is this it?" I asked Zane.

He didn't answer me. We got to the doors where Dimitri was waiting for us. He knocked loudly. A few moments passed and a young boy, who looked around the age of fifteen, answered. He was dressed in a suit, his bleach blond hair swirled up in a stange hair style, his bright blue eyes staring at us expectedly. "It's about time you got here. Master has been waiting for you."