Soda -

I will never forget that morning I found that letter. I was doing laundry and I washed a couple shirts of Jenny's. I carried the clothes into her room she shared with Darry. I sat the basket on the bed and found myself walking towards his desk. I ran my hands across the wood and sat down. I was looking through his drawers when I found a letter.

I held it on my hand and looked at it. It had a Marine Crops symbol in the left corner but what shocked me that it was addressed to me. The name read "Sodapop P. Curtis". I saw that the letter had been opened many months ago. I found that Darry had a second letter addressed to him. I found a third letter in that desk drawer, I wasn't sure whether to be angry or upset. I was so confused and upset, the tears ran down my face.

With a shake hand I started to open the letter with my name on it. Darry's messy hand writing across it. I unfolded the letter and sobbed. I knew my brother had given up the time of his life for me.

Dear Soda,

If you find this letter, either I'm gone or just plain stupid. Well, the truth is Uncle Sam wanted you. I couldn't sent you to a foreign godforsaken land a world away. I love you too much, brother. I hope that someday you can forgive me. I went in your place because I love you and I want to protect you. I don't know if I'm just brave or plain stupid. Maybe a little bit of both, i guess.

I've always made tough calls, kiddo. You might be wondering why I went in your place. I knew killing people would tear you apart. I couldn't watch a war destroy the man I love so much. I've accepted I could be leaving behide the brothers and woman I love so much. I've given up the dreams i had twice, it doesn't bother me. Life doesn't always work out the way you dream it to be.You make the tough calls when you love someone. I'm sorry little brother, this isn't your fault. I chose to take risk, I knew that when i volunteered.

It's what brothers are for, I face the anger of guns so you don't have to. I take the risk because no one deserve to lie cold and wounded in their own 's just a sacrifice your older brother made, I made the call. Don't deny there is a war going on. A pointless , stupid war that we are fighting and men are killed everyday. It's not fair , but neither is life. This is what brothers are for, Pepsi. Don't forget that, the circumstances are different. I can take care of myself, kiddo. After all I'm superman , right?

I've seen the way war can tear a grow man apart. I know my risks but I knew it what I had to do. Pony has lost so many people he's loved, he couldn't lose you. I'm just the mean ole' grizzly bear with a soft side, the kid needs you more than he needs me. Don't try to tell me that ain't true, I'm just Darry. I can't hold Pony together the way you can. He might be a grown man now but he's lost so many people.

Just think about it kiddo, we all lost the people we love the most. We lost Mama and Daddy when we needed them the most. Johnny was sweet and didn't deserve the life he had, yet he died in that hospital bed 'cause no one could save him. Dallas ,so cold and hard but had a story, he was human too you know. He took his own life when that haze of bullets killed him. Steve is fighting a war away, he's so angry and I worry for him. Steve is clinging to life unable to cope with the pain. Two -bit takes to drinking his pain away. Someday he'll put the bottle to his head and pull the trigger. Then there's me, the hopeless hero who tries to save the world but dies a world away.

Pony needs a stable person in his life, I can't offer that. You can , I know you can be that person. Do what ever you have to get him through collage. He deserve the world, i can't give him that. I want the best for that kid. He's become the man i knew he would be. He has all this amazing talent and let him go what ever the hell he wants. Tell him to write a book if he wants, i just want him to be happy.

Find someone who will love Jenny like I loved her. I had so many ideas and dreams with the woman.I had a life i wanted share, sadly that may not happen. She's something special , something a man would be damn lucky to find. She's amazing and so out of my league. I should have married that girl. Remind her how much I love her, I do love her to the moon and back. She made me feel like a man again. I had forget what it meant to be a man.

Soda , please take good care of my family. I love you always. Little brother, I hope someday you can forgive me. Maybe dying in a world away in't a bad ending to my story.

Darry

I was in tears and screaming out my pain. I was so angry, confused and the pain was unbearable. How could my brother do this to me? Darry wanted to die, didn't he? I let the sobs rack my body and I shook violently. I wanted to just wrap my arms around Darry and give him a big hug. Yet, I wanted to hit him for being an idiot and tell him how important he is. How could he think that Pony doesn't need him?

To be continued...

Author's note: Merry Christmas and a happy New Year. I will update after New Years, and the story still is going. Thanks for everything my lovely readers, I hope you enjoyed this chapter.