Hallo. I know that I fucked up all of people´s minds last chapter. What happened? Why jump two years forward? I am sorry, if last chapter was too random. But I have some bad news. This will be the last chapter in least one/two week(s). I am really sorry. Tell me, what you think.

I want someone to love me

For who I am

I want someone to need me

Is that so bad

I wanna break our madness

But it´s all I have

I want someone to love me

For who I am

'Who I am' by Nick Jonas

USA – September 2017

"Why are you with this 'Zaccy', when Victor is your soulfinder?" Will asks just, as Victor inters the house with a: "Will, what is taken so… Angelus." I am in shock. I have not seen Victor, since last fall… But as Victor inters into the house, Zaccy inters with little Juliet in his arms. Victor says: "Angel, please. Just listen… I…" But Zaccy cuts him off: "Victor Benedict, you stay away from her, do hear me? Stay away from her. She is with me now, which you just got to accept. So stay away from her." This is, what I feared would happen, if those two are in the same room. But do I want? I love Zaccy, I really do. But I know that Victor is the one for me.

"Zaccy that is enough. Please stop, and… I think that you should stay in your own house tonight. Will, do you not have to take the Nadia and Lucy to the ball? Victor, something tells me that we need to talk." I say with a voice full of coldness. Zaccy tries to find a way to stay, but I give him one look, and he leaves after handing me Juliet. I look at her and smiles. She looks so much like her mother that it is almost unbelievable. That poor woman, she had deserved better.

"Victor, you have two minutes to say, what you think, is importing. You better not waste my time, because as you can see, I have better things to do."

"I thought that you could not have more children." Victor says.

"I cannot. Juliet here is… adopted. Her mother… she and I… shared a room at the hospital. She was pregnant and scared – Thinking that she would not make it. She did not, so I guess that she was right. But before she gave birth, she had me promise that, if she did not make, I would take care of the child, as it was my own." I say while thinking about Harriet, Juliet´s real mother. Harriet was so young, too young…

"Hey, come here." Victor says and hugs me, while I still have Juliet in my arms. I cry.

"Everything is going to be okay. I promise." Victor says.

"How can you promise such thing?"

"Because I love you, and I do not want to spend any more time without you in my life. I understand if… we can only be friends, but I do hope that one day… maybe we can be more." Victor says. He looks at Juliet, who is smiling at both of us.

"I… love you too. But what about Zaccy? I cannot…"

"Hey. We will figure it out. Together."

Denmark – August 2015:

I have cancer, but I am not going to let it win. I cannot do that to my family and Victor. I smile. I hope that we can be together, after I am healthy again. He understands, or so I think. My phone rings. When you speak of the sun… Victor.

"Hallo there handsome." I say.

"Hallo, my beautiful angel. How are you today?" Victor asks.

"I am good. I have a doctor appointment, but else… pretty good. How are thing going with you?"

"Emma is… a bitch. She does not even want to do anything. She is just lying in her bed and staring. Do all pregnant women go through that?"

"Why are you asking me?"

"Because I love you, and you have almost giving birth to, as many children as my mother."

"I love you too. And I have only giving birth to Jessie, Valerie and Deke. But off course if one also courts all the miscarriages that I have, then I have giving birth to more children than your mother. I think that you should take her to a doctor the sooner the better."

"Did you have a lot off miscarriages?"

"Yeah, once I did."

"I am sorry." Victor says.

"So am I."

"But thank you."

Fall of the year 2017:

"Angelus, I just wanted to tell that we just got your resultants back. And I am happy to tell you that there are not more cancer cells in your body. You are clean." Helen says. I am clean off cancer. I am free. I laugh. Helen laughs with me.

"Go. Go get him, Angelus. I know that you have been holding yourself back, because of the cancer. Now you do not have to worry about that any more. It may come back, but I do not think so in your case. You are too much off a fighter."

"Thank you, Helen. I am going to see him. So can you take care of my children, while I fly to America to surprise Victor? I will be gone for about 3-5 days…"

"Yeah, you know that I love your children, and after the death off your twin brother…" Helen says, as I interrupt her: "Please, do not say another word about Lucy. I cannot…"

"It is okay. Go."

"Thank you." I say and leave Helen´s office.

I am in America now. Victor lives in Denver. I am going to surprise him… I walk up to plat and into it. Victor gave me a key two months ago. A bit of a shock, when he gave the key. But it was, what I found inside there shocked me the most. The whole flat is full of sex noise, which makes me a bit interested. But what I saw… still hunts me. Victor was with Emma. I think that is the kindest way to put it. Okay, they were fucking. I am just standing there… I do not know what to do. Yes, I have been in this situation before. Once with Zuko, but we had a deal about it was okay for us to sleep with other people. But Victor and I do not have such a deal. I love him, which is more than I have ever felt towards Zuko. I had seen enough, so I leave. There is no reason for me to stay. Or come back ever again, so I leave my key to Victor to find.

A few days after:

"Angelus, I am in labor. Please come. You promised." Harriet, a friend of mine says.

"I am on my way. Which hospital?"

"Rigshospitalet. Please hurry." Harriet says. I am so glad that the children are at my brothers today. Or I simply had not idea about what to do. I drive as quickly I can. I am at the hospital in 10 minutes of the call of Harriet.

"Where is she?" I ask Nurse Jackson, who knows both me and Harriet.

"Room 3. Follow me." She says.

"How is she?"

"Scared, but will be better as some as you are there."

"Thank you."

"Cherry, I am doing this for the both off you. You have this bound that no one else understands, and you clearly care for her."

"She is like the little sister that I never had."

"I think that you should tell her that."

"I have. Wait… is it that bad?" We stop right in front of room 3.

"Cherry, I will not lie to you. We do not know if she will make it."

"No, no. Not also her. I cannot lose more people. I just cannot."

"We are doing everything that we can do."

"I know. Can I go in?"

"Go ahead, Cherry."

"Thank you, Nurse Jackson."

Harriet did not make it, and therefore I left the hospital one day later with a baby. Not what I had foreseen. I named her Juliet Harriet Pendragon. Juliet after Zaccy´s dead soulfinder. Harriet after her real mother. And last but not least I gave her my last name. I hope that Harriet is sitting up on a sky and liking my name for her daughter.