By Leela Starsky.
CHAPTER FIVE
Mos Eisley hadn't changed at all, Calrissian decided. It had been almost seven years since he'd set foot in the place but it could have been yesterday for all the difference it made. The same unrelenting heat seemed to suck the moisture right out of him. The same dull-eyed locals, the same pirate-infested spaceport and cantinas. The same pathetic denizens lurking in the back alleys.
He and Chewbacca had parted company with their fellow convicts over a week ago in Mos Espa, where Calrissian had stolen clothes from a drunk human in one of the back alleys. The garb was already well worn and even threadbare in places but, after a couple of days, at least it no longer smelled like its old owner.
Chalmun's cantina was the first step to Jabba, and stepping down into the cool dimness of the place was almost a relief. Almost. The likelihood of being killed in here, simply because someone didn't like the look of you, was very high.
Chewbacca went straight through the doorway at the back of the bar to talk to Chalmun, the Wookiee who ran this den, while Calrissian calmly introduced himself into a sabacc match. He and Chewbacca had been mostly stealing to survive for the last few weeks, although he had won them a little money in Mos Espa. Nevertheless, Lando decided that winning a small pot today would help him draw less notice when he had to win larger stakes tomorrow or the next day.
Buying Solo back from Jabba would be very expensive, if possible at all. Calrissian strongly suspected that Jabba would want to make an example of Solo. And, having found out the likely results of an injudicious de-freezing of Solo from a medic in Mos Espa, Lando hoped that Jabba would want to spend a few months gloating at Solo in carbonite before unfreezing him.
Held at blaster point, the medic had been very helpful, and had furnished them with all the information and medications they required to safely thaw Han, should they have to do it out of a medcentre. But, for Solo's sake, Calrissian hoped that they would be able to get him to a medcentre and not have to resort to such primitive methods. There was still no guarantee the Corellian would come out of the carbonite undamaged; in fact the medic had been clinically surprised to hear that the unlucky Corellian had survived the initial 'freeze'.
Chewbacca returned from the back room sometime later, by which time Calrissian had bought them both a meal and a drink with his winnings.
According to Chalmun's sources, Fett had delivered Solo to Jabba a week ago, and the Hutt had hung the slab of carbonite proudly on one of the walls in his throne room. That fit in perfectly with their plan.
Unfortunately, and much to his chagrin, Chewbacca could not go to the palace himself; even he admitted he was too recognisable. And they needed passage off the planet. Sothey had agreed that while Calrissian infiltrated Jabba's palace and hopefully succeeded in stealing Solo, Chewbacca would try to steal a ship or at least secure them a passage to the next system.
That evening, Calrissian won enough credits in a high stakes sabacc match to get himself noticed as well as identifying one of Jabba's guards. The guard unfortunately came off second best when he upset a Wookiee and, needing a replacement, the Quarren in charge of the group agreed to take on Calrissian as the guards' replacement.
And so Lando soon found himself sailing south across the endless dunes in the middle of the Tatooine night in a sand skiff with five other guards. He was the only human among them, which helped. Under the current climate, most non-humans hated humans, so he wasn't forced to make small talk with them.
It took several hours and was fully day by the time they got there. Lando was outfitted with everything he would need to defend Jabba and put straight on duty. Jabba himself was completely unaware that he even had a new guard.
It took Calrissian a moment to locate what he was looking for, but finally he found it. Hanging in an alcove to the right of Jabba's dais, in full view of Jabba and any prospective supplicants. The grimace of pain on Solo's carbonite face a grim warning to all.
….
On the other side of the grimace, oblivious to the world outside, Han Solo was existing in a world of nightmares.The carbon freezing procedure had slowed the synaptic activity in his brain dramatically but, fortunately for him, it hadn't quite stopped. Although he didn't know it, Han Solo owed his life to the Cloud City medic who had flooded his system with a combination of medications just prior to his incarceration in carbonite. A combination that had reacted to the snap freezing of his cells by hyper-oxygenating them. This had allowed most of the cells in his body to expand rather than rupture as they froze, thereby slowing his metabolism to almost nothing without quite killing him. In short, a crude form of hibernation.
For most of his hibernation, Han Solo was unaware but, every so often, a spark that normally flew at a speed of one hundred metres per second would trickle from one synaptic circuit to another, triggering a thought or dream. But the excess adrenaline in his system, also supplied by the Cloud City medic to assist in his resuscitation, turned any moments of consciousness to a constant state of terror and panic. As a result, Solo's dreams were mostly nightmares.
And nearly all of them were about Leia. A result of the lingering terror of what he had left her to. Of what Vader might have done to her. In these nightmares he had watched her raped and murdered under Vader's instruction many times now and, along with the fear he experienced every time, came the all-encompassing shame and guilt. That it was all his fault.
But this time the random firing of his brain triggered a slow but steady release of serotonin and noradrenaline and, instead of feeling pain and an overwhelming sense of peril, Solo found himself wallowing in orgasmic passion with Leia on a grassy plain. Leia looked unspeakably happy and Solo knew he felt the same.
And this time it lasted a small forever.
….
Landing the Falcon on Dagobah was an achievement in itself. Landing it without the assistance of a co-pilot put all of his skills, including his Force talent, to the test. As he completed shut down, Luke couldn't help wondering how Yoda would feel about the intrusion. At least this time he had managed to land on firm ground and wouldn't have to prove himself by trying to lift the ship out of a swamp.
Leia was asleep in the bunkroom and, Luke knew, would be livid when she found out where he had brought them. She had insisted they head straight for Tatooine. Would discuss nothing but rescuing Han. Had attempted to draw him in with various plans. But Luke had told her he wouldn't let her participate in any such rescue. He was aware she had started bleeding again and, he told her, the risk to her pregnancy was too great. So now she was refusing to discuss anything with him at all.
As well as the need to protect Leia, Luke had his own need to see the Jedi Master who had been giving him such intensive training three weeks ago. He needed explanations for the lies he had been fed all his life.
He lowered the ramp and the familiar, distinctive smells of Dagobah filled the ship.
….
They were on Alderaan. How was beside the point, but Leia knew that was where they were. Home. Han was bringing her home. They were meeting her family at the Summer Palace and, while she couldn't wait to get there, she had insisted on stopping the airtaxi a good kilometre from the palace so they could walk up.
Han was a little chagrined, she could tell, but prepared to indulge her nonetheless. She could sense his eagerness to reach the palace, as happy to be home as she was. But she could also sense in him a desire to rush her straight to their bedroom, and felt a corresponding ache within herself. But first she wanted to savour the sounds and smells of home.
The Summer Palace looked east over the Calapora Ocean from a high cliff-face that stretched for almost thirty kilometres north and south. The spaceport and the city of Beren were almost twenty kilometres to the west, with nothing but windswept grassland between them and the palace.
Leia closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying the feel of the sun on her face, then opened them again to marvel at how incredibly blue the sky was, with not a cloud to be seen. Below them the sea shone turquoise, but at the horizon was the deepest azure. To her rightshe could see glimpses of the white walls of the palace, sunlight reflecting brilliantly from its many windows, and beyond it – grass as far as she could see.
Exulting in the openness of the world around her, and the wonderful sense of freedom it gave her, Leia dropped the pack she was carrying on the path and ran into the shoulder-high grass beside them. She sensed Han's bemusement as he followed her and sought to tease him by bolting away from him. She felt an overwhelming urge to make love to him right here and now and was delighted to feel an answering spike in his simmering desire as he launched after her.
She let him catch her before they reached the edge of the cliff, laughing as he pulled her down with him into the long grass. Neither bothered to undress, simply baring the essentials before joining in a frantic moment of passion. Her desire for him was white hot and she felt herself start to climax almost immediately. She kissed him desperately as it overwhelmed her, felt herself throbbing around him as he continued to thrust into her. Suddenly breathless, she gasped, then cried his name, "Han!" as he joined her in the crescendo.
…..
Leia opened her eyes but didn't move. She could feel her body spiralling down from orgasm and felt ashamed and excited all at once. The dream had seemed so real, but never in her life had she reached true physical climax from a dream. She closed her eyes again, enjoying the sensations coursing through her body and wishing she could go back to the dream, wishing Han was still there beside her, holding her.
Han.
Sliding her hand across her belly, clinging to the physical evidence that her time with Solo had been real, Leia took a deep breath, rolled onto her back and opened her eyes to stare at the overhead bulkhead. Like an unwelcome guest that wouldn't leave, the ever-present nausea rose its ugly head and washed away any residue good feelings left by her climax. Leia moaned resentfully and closed her eyes again, wondering if she would make it to the 'fresher in time. And even if she did, she knew she'd be faced with her daily dilemma of which end to empty first.
Taking a deep breath, Leia forced herself out of bed and ran for the 'fresher. By the time she emerged, she had realised by the lack of sound from the Falcon's engines that Luke must have landed the ship. Landed the ship without her!
She hurried into the main hold and the cool humidity hit her. Definitely not Tatooine. Anger building, Leia approached the ramp to find it down and unprotected. Well trained by Han and her own sense of self-preservation, she slapped her hand over the hatch release and felt a modicum of satisfaction as it slammed down. Furious, she stormed to the cockpit. It, too, was empty and she realised she was alone on the ship, looking out across a vista of swampland.
If she had been able to pilot the Falcon alone Leia would have happily abandoned Luke on whatever planet he'd brought them to.
She stormed back to the bunkroom and hurriedly dressed. Once again she was without choice as far as clothes went and this time had to don the impractical dress she'd been wearing when they'd fled Vader's Star Destroyer. Just the thing to go traipsing round swamps in, she thought sarcastically, roughly weaving her hair into one plait then flinging it over her shoulder to hang limply down her back. But she added a belt to her ensemble. One of Han's belts, already loaded with vibroblade, lamp, a small pouch of rations, powercells and a blaster recharge. She jammed his spare blaster between her body and the belt and, as an afterthought, hooked Han's mother's lightsabre on it as well. Just for luck, she thought to herself. She had no idea where they were or what she'd encounter once she left the safety of the ship, nor was she prepared to take any chances. It wasn't just her life in the balance any more.
Finally, she donned Han's jacket. The one he'd been wearing on Bespin. Despite the obvious humidity outside, the air did not feel warm, and the jacket gave her the advantage of extra pockets to fill with things she might need. Plus it smelled of Han and she took comfort in that. Blaster in hand, Leia opened the hatch to the ramp, stepped through and closed it behind her. She wondered if Luke knew the code that opened it, and took some satisfaction in the image of him sitting at the bottom of the ramp waiting for her to show up and open the ship.
She paused at the bottom of the ramp to take stock of her surroundings, unwilling to step off into the mud before she had to. Luke had somehow managed to land the ship on the only piece of open ground she could see. All around her the trees were draped with vines, mist and heavy with moisture. The strong scent of wet earth and organic decay filled her senses, and the noise of unseen animals was constant.
Where had Luke brought them? There was a strange familiarity about the place that left her with a deep sense of unease and she put it down to memories of the tropical jungles of Galadan or Yavin 4. But those jungles had been hot, this one was cool.
Ignoring her stomach's attempt to heave, Leia hitched up her dress and stepped off the ramp. She took a few steps towards the nearest tree, then wondered where the hell she thought she was going? She had no idea which direction Luke had gone, and the swamplands before her looked unforgiving and dangerous.
As if to encourage her retreat, it suddenly started raining. Feeling particularly stupid, Leia hurried back to the shelter offered by the Falcon, then decided it would be more practical for her to wait in the cockpit. It occurred to her that she should take the time to find something to eat and drink, but the turmoil in her stomach did not encourage that at all, so Leia simply settled herself into Solo's chair, shifted deeper into the warmth of his jacket, and waited.
….
The wait turned into a lengthy one, and eventually she decided to brave the galley, returning to the cockpit with a pre-packaged meal of eggs and a large mug of soup. She was surprised at her sudden appetite and, while not wanting to deny her body the much needed protein, had made sure the foods she picked would be easy to vomit back up. The eggs went down surprisingly easily, and the soup was so enjoyable she actually considered going back for more. But, not wishing to push her luck, Leia remained where she was and, as always, her thoughts turned to Han.
….
Luke was surprised to find the hatch into the Falcon closed and gave the small Jedi Master standing behind him a look of apology.
"She's locked us out," he told the small, green creature.
"Surprised you seem," was the gravelly reply.
Luke regarded him for a moment then nodded penitently. Leia hadn't trusted him since he'd told her who his father was. Of course she would have locked him out. The Jedi Master's response suggested he hadn't expected otherwise from her, and Luke couldn't help wondering if Yoda was speaking from what he knew about the Princess of Alderaan or what he was feeling from her through the Force.
With a mental sigh of resignation, Luke activated the comm.
"Leia?"
…
In the cockpit, Leia jerked awake and looked around in confusion.
"Leia?"
She pushed her hair back out of her face as she sat up properly, struggling to make sense of her situation with a sleep-befuddled brain.
"C'mon, Leia." Luke's voice sounded almost peeved through the small speaker. "Let me in."
Leia glowered at the speaker for a moment then climbed out of the pilot seat and headed for the ramp, hoping her brain would be sharp enough to give Luke a piece of her mind by the time she got there. She opened the hatch then folded her arms and regarded the approaching young man with arrogant affront.
He had anticipated her first reprimand about leaving the outer hatch open because he told her matter-of-factly as he moved into the ship, "You were perfectly safe here, Leia."
Leia was opening her mouth to argue with him when the small, green creature following Luke up the ramp distracted her. He looked like a goblin straight out of an Alderaanian fairy tale.
"This is Yoda," Luke said. "The Jedi Master who has been training me."
Leia frowned. Luke had not mentioned the name before but she recalled hearing it somewhere before. From Han. Why would Han have been telling her about some obscure Jedi Master? Then she realised she was being scrutinised by the creature and her frown deepened.
"Much anger in this one," the Jedi Master opined sagely and Leia looked sourly at Luke.
"Perceptive, isn't he?" she said sarcastically.
"Learn to control it you must, or follow your father's path you will," Yoda warned her.
Leia's anger flared in response and she suspected the creature had baited her deliberately.
"My father is dead," she told him coldly.
"Think of your child you must," the goblin-like thing said as it approached her.
Leia threw Luke a look of reprimand for telling the creature about her pregnancy, then glared at the wizened creature with affront as it tapped her belly with a small stick and said, "Strong with the Force she is."
"So everyone keeps telling me," she said, fighting the instinct to back out of reach, and resting her hand on the blaster in her belt instead. Without taking her eyes off him, she added, "Touch me again and you'll regret it."
"Leia," Luke warned crossly.
Leia switched her glare to Luke and snapped, "Why aren't we on Tatooine, Luke?"
"Because you've been touching the Dark Side of the Force," he snapped straight back. "And unless you get some training you will be just like our father!"
Leia all but trembled with fury, then stormed away towards the cockpit hissing, "If I could fly this ship by myself…"
She threw herself into Han's chair and glared impotently at the swampland outside. So Luke had managed to find himself a Jedi Master. Leia found that fact intriguing since it had been her understanding that they'd all been killed during the Purge. She remembered her feeling of surprise when her father had instructed her to seek out Obi Wan Kenobi on Tatooine. Surprise that the Jedi Knight had managed to evade capture for so long and consternation that he hadn't been more active in their fight against the Empire. And now here was another one. Leia couldn't help wondering cynically how many other Jedi Masters were out there hiding. Whatever this one's reasons, Leia was predisposed to dislike him.
…
In the ring corridor, Luke sighed and ran a hand through his hair, trying to quell the feeling of frustration and irritation she had provoked in him. Leia was making this as difficult as she could and Luke just wished she would stop being childish. He looked at Yoda and opened his mouth to apologise for the princess' behaviour when it occurred to him that a lot of their trauma was a direct consequence of the Jedi Master's scheming. So he closed his mouth and simply regarded his Master, wondering what the small creature's next move might be.
Yoda and Ben had both explained the reasoning behind their deception. That growing up with the knowledge of who his father was would have been too great a burden for him, plus the need to keep him hidden had been paramount. But Luke wasn't sure he agreed. He suspected they were afraid that if he had known, he would have walked the same dark path as his father. And he also suspected they were still not being entirely truthful with him.
They had both insisted that the attempt on his life as a child had not been orchestrated by the Jedi as Vader believed, but had in fact been another manipulation by the Emperor to further enrage his father against the Jedi. To facilitate the Emperor's Purge of the Jedi order. That made sense, but Luke had come to the conclusion that they had all been guilty of manipulating his father to their own ends. That the Jedi Order's very selective education, not to mention their unrealistic ban on relationships, had in fact triggered the internal schism that had sent Anakin on his spiral to the Dark Side.
Kenobi informed him that his first Master, Qui Gon Jinn, had claimed Anakin Skywalker to be some sort of prophetic "Chosen One". A great Jedi who would bring 'balance' to the order. Well, as with all prophesies, the realisation was not quite what the devotees had expected. Vader had brought 'balance' all right, Kenobi had admitted wryly. 'Balance' in the form of annihilation.
As for not telling him about his sister… Luke was probably angrier about that than any of the other deceptions. Remembering how he had felt about Leia on Yavin Four, it appalled him to think what might have happened had she been more receptive to him at the time. What if they had slept together? What if they'd had the misfortune to create a child? The prospect well and truly sickened him, and he suspected that, if Han had not stayed, things might well have turned out differently.
Confronting Yoda about it had been completely unsatisfying, as he had simply taken refuge in the fact that nothing had happened. But Luke knew how he had felt at the time, and felt somehow violated because of it.
He watched Yoda follow the princess to the cockpit and decided not to follow.
….
Leia heard the distinctive footfalls of Luke's Jedi Master as he approached and wiped a hand across her face. Her nausea was fast reaching the point she knew would have her in the 'fresher, yet she still sought to ignore it as long as possible.
"Leia Organa," said the distinctive voice behind her.
Leia pointedly did not acknowledge him, simply continued to stare out through the cockpit canopy.
"Hide from your destiny you cannot."
Destiny? Leia thought angrily. You arrogant little prat! How dare you try to give your petty machinations that level of respectability?
"I'm not hiding," Leia told him calmly. "I just have different priorities." She turned and regarded him coolly, cutting him off as he started to speak. "Priorities that have little to do with Jedi agenda, I'm afraid."
"Seek to rescue your lover you do," Yoda said, closing the distance between them. "But only with Jedi training will you succeed."
Leia felt her expression darken despite her intention to draw on her political training and remain emotionally calm. "In your opinion," she said.
"Save him on Hoth you did," the aged creature croaked, and Leia wanted to hit Luke for sharing his opinion of the reason behind Solo's recovery on Hoth.
"So on Tatooine will you try," Yoda continued. "But learn to control those skills you must, or fail on Tatooine you will."
Now he had her full attention. Leia frowned at him, replaying what he'd just said several times in her head. Assuming that she had used the Force to somehow bring Han back from the brink of death after the cave-in on Hoth, Leia could accept that she might well want to try something similar on Tatooine. The small amount of information she could find on cryogenic freezing in the Falcon's databanks had all pointed to Solo needing to be revived within ten minutes of 'de-freezing' before irreparable brain damage began.
That added to the urgency of her desire to get to Tatooine. If the Hutt took it into his head to release Solo from the carbonite, without full medcentre facilities, Leia doubted there would be anything they could do to save him.
Leia had tried to pinpoint exactly what she had done on Hoth but could only remember the desperate feeling of loss. Everything I touch, everything I love dies. And now here she was, face to face with a Jedi Master prepared to teach her the skills she needed to revive Han.
She was well aware that he had quite deliberately picked the one topic to pique her interest. And, with the mindset of a politician, Leia determined to use him to get what she wanted.
"Vader said I was using the Dark Side," she told him. Luke had doubtless told Yoda the same thing, but she knew that invoking Vader's name would carry more weight. "Can you still teach me or is it too late?"
"Dangerous to teach you it will be," Yoda admitted. "Divide your attention this child does. Hard for you to focus."
"That's just the nausea," Leia muttered dismissively. "As soon as that passes, I'll be fine."
"Change that you can, but feel the Force you must."
Leia sat up. "Are you saying you can teach me to make the nausea go away?" Yoda nodded, and she could see the hint of a smug smile in his expression. "Show me now!" she demanded.
Yoda walked out of the cockpit. "Come," he said.
…
Luke looked up as Yoda stepped into the ring corridor. He had busied himself filling a pack with food and drink from the galley and was waiting with it slung over his shoulder when the Jedi Master appeared. He suspected Yoda would want to take them some distance, and was concerned for the health of Leia's pregnancy on such a hike, but fell into step beside her as she followed the Jedi Master to the ramp.
"Do you know where we're going?" Leia asked him as she closed the hatch behind them.
"No," Luke said, keeping his eye on the quick moving Jedi as Leia moved around under the ramp and activated its closure. When it was secure she activated the ship lockdown then joined him without meeting his eyes, both of them aware that only she knew the codes that would get them back into the ship.
Then they set off after Yoda.
…
The first time they had to stop and wait while Leia threw up Luke felt a small level of concern but, as she'd vomited several times en route to Dagobah, he'd guessed it was part of the whole pregnancy deal. But waiting as she threw up for the fifth time inside an hour had him seriously concerned.
"She can't go on like this," he told Yoda quietly, and felt a level of irritation as the Jedi Master simply smiled and kept walking.
Frustrated, Luke waited until Leia's retching had ceased then sat on the large tree root beside her as she tried to catch her breath. He wanted to help her. Felt certain the techniques Vader had taught him to push away pain could be used to help lessen her nausea. But he felt like Yoda was testing him: seeing whether or not he would give in and use Vader's methods. But Yoda hadn't said anything like that, and Luke suspected it was his own misguided feeling of guilt that stopped him from using them.
"Would you let me help you?" he asked tentatively, not wanting to spark her ire.
Leia looked up at him from a gaunt face and sunken eyes and Luke's concern for her increased dramatically. She was seriously dehydrated and in obvious need of a medcentre.
"Let me help you, Leia," he begged, and was delighted when she simply nodded.
Too ill to argue, he thought grimly, then closed his eyes to concentrate. He needed to know what was going on inside her body; what was causing the nausea. And felt a real fear that his interference might compromise her pregnancy.
"Tell me what's causing it," he said, hoping she would be able to tell him more than just 'the pregnancy.'
"Hormones," Leia replied, struggling to find enough moisture in her mouth to stop her voice from croaking. "Hormones irritating the lining of my stomach." She retched briefly then added, "That's what the information the medic gave me said anyway."
Can't change the hormones, Luke told himself. Mustn't change the hormones. So let's see if we can't change what her stomach thinks… or what she thinks it's telling her…
A moment later he opened his eyes and looked at her. "Did it work?" he asked.
Leia looked warily at him, started to retch and burped instead. Then a look of utter relief swept across her face and Luke knew he'd succeeded. He smiled and she gripped his arm.
"Luke…"
"Better?" he asked.
"It's not gone but it's…" Leia closed her eyes suddenly and covered her mouth with one hand. For a moment Luke thought her nausea had returned, then she roughly wiped away a tear that had escaped and run down her cheek. Throwing caution to the wind, he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her. And felt a moment of joy when she hugged him back.
"Thankyou," she murmured. "This is the first time I haven't felt so nauseous in weeks." Abruptly she shoved him away and declared, "I should hit you!"
"Hit me?"
"You could have stopped this weeks ago, but you let me suffer!"
Luke shook his head and started to explain, "Vader showed me how after my hand-"
Leia cut him off with a hard look and said, "I don't want to know." Then got to her feet and headed off after Yoda.
Luke watched her go for a moment, savouring the sight of her lifting her skirts to follow the small Jedi though the boggy forest, seeing a spring in her step and an energy in her body language that hadn't been there a moment before. And, most of all, sensing a healing in the rift that had come between them.
She had hugged him.
Smiling, Luke hurried after his sister.