Hey guys! Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. So here is chapter 10. There are lemons ;) Enjoy reading and thanks for all the lovely reviews :)
I was aching all over, that's how badly I wanted Edward. It took a few seconds for his words to sink in. He's not going have sex with me...he's not going to have sex with me. His words were replaying in my head over and over again. What the fuck! The anger started burning through my veins. He has been turning me on and making me wet and kissing me senseless and now the asshole doesn't want to sleep with me! What the flying fuck is wrong with him! I can feel his cock hard and ready so I know he wants me and he can't deny that. Before I could stop myself I felt my hand connect with his face. I couldn't stop it. I didn't mean to slap him, ok well maybe a little bit. Days of pent up sexual frustration and him denying me at this moment was just too much and I just slapped him. I don't know who was more shocked; me or him.
I looked at his face and on his left cheek there was a distinct red mark. I thought he would be severely pissed at me for slapping him, but he was breathing harder and when I looked at his eyes they were black with lust. Oh, my Edward likes getting a bit rough it seems. I tried to say something, but my words got caught in my throat. He looked like he was about to devour me and all I want to do is scream for him to take me! He suddenly jumped off me and started pacing the room while pulling on his hair. He looked so conflicted and he had a crease in the middle of his eyebrows that I wanted to smooth out and tell him to stop stressing.
"Edward it's ..." I started to say as I got up from the chaise, but he looked back at me with a look that told me to sit down. Damn that was just turning me on even more.
"For the love of all that is holy Bella would you just sit down and cover yourself. I'm trying very hard to control myself here," he said in a strained voice that made my pussy weep for attention. I looked down at my chest as I remembered I was shirtless and Edward had pulled my boobs out of my bra. I was sitting on the chaise with nothing but my yoga pants and my boobs hanging out of my bra, well they don't hang but you get what I mean. I pulled my bra back up, but I refuse to put my shirt back on until he tells me what the fuck is going on.
"Edward would you stop pacing and calm the fuck down and talk to me!" I yelled in frustration.
"Fuck Bella, you have no idea how hard it is for me not to fuck you right now. You have no idea how fucking hard I am right now!" he yelled back while pulling on his hair.
"Then why the fuck did you stop! If you weren't paying attention, I was practically begging you to fuck me so why aren't you doing that right now!" I yelled while balling my fist in anger.
"Because I don't want you to be another quick fuck! I care too much about you to just fuck you on my chaise for the first time. God damn it Bella I wanted it to be more. I wanted to be more to you than just a fuck." he yelled with wide eyes. He cares about me...he wants more...he thinks I'm just after sex. Am I just after sex? Is that all I want? Do I care about him? Yes, yes I do care about him, more than I should. This revelation shocked the hell out of me. I can't care about him, fuck! I promised myself that I wouldn't get involved with anyone here. My sole purpose here was to learn about myself and magic not to bloody well go and fall in love. Fuck wait, am I falling for him? That's crazy we have known each other for a few days. This is crazy. I can't breathe, I need to get out of here now.
I grabbed my shirt and quickly put it on. I grabbed my bag and headed for the door, not saying a word. I don't know what to say or even if I could say anything at all at this moment. Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me back to him.
"Drop the bag Bella. You aren't going anywhere and we are going to talk. I won't let you run away from me again." he said in a determined tone while his eyes were pleading with me to stay. Without giving it another thought, I dropped my bag and went to sit on the bed. I knew if I kept thinking about this situation that I would freak myself out so badly that I would be storming out the door. Edward came and sat next to me on the bed and pulled us so that he was leaning back against the headboard and I was cuddled into his chest. He gave me a quick peck on the head and let out a big sigh.
"I'm sorry if I freaked you out by coming on so strong, but it all true Bella. I do care about you and I don't want to loose you. After what happened with Lizzie I just pull the people I care about so close to me cause I'm constantly afraid of losing them like I lost her." he said in a low voice. I could tell that her death did a number on him. He was holding on to the people he loved tightly because he lost her. Me on the other hand was afraid to let myself care for anyone in fear that I will loose someone else like I lost my parents.
"Edward why don't you want to sleep with me?" I asked as I was hit with all my insecurities. Maybe he doesn't find me attractive, maybe this maybe that. I went through countless reasons that the idea, of being with me, would put him off and all of them were ridiculous reasons.
"Trust me Bella there is nothing I want more than to fuck you senseless but I also want to make love to you. I don't want this to just be about sex. I want more with you. You have had a dramatic day and I don't think you are thinking clearly. I don't want to be a distraction." he said in a very nervous tone. He thinks I don't want to be with him. He thinks after what happen today I was using sex as a distraction. Ok that one might be a bit true. Can I really open up more than I already have with him? Can I really let him see the darkest parts of me? I decided to be honest with him.
"Edward, I do care about you and it terrifies me. I can't stand the thought of losing someone I care about, not after what happened with my parents. I don't think I would be able to survive that kind of heartbreak again. With you going into the Unknown, there is a great possibility of something bad happing to you and it kills me just to think about it. " I said in a soft voice as I snuggled closer to him.
"Bella, I don't have a choice when it comes to going into the Unknown. It's my duty to protect the portal. There is always a risk but I am very well trained and I have very strong soldiers with me all the time. What can I do to ease your mind about me going into the Unknown?" he said while tightening his arms around me. I thought about that for a minute. What would make me feel better about him risking his life in the Unknown...
"Take me with you into the Unknown. Train me. Teach me how to fight and let me help you." I said while looking him straight in the eyes so that he knows I'm being dead serious.
"Absolutely fucking not Bella. Under no circumstances will I let you into the Unknown! It is way to fucking dangerous!" he growled at me.
"Edward I am not a weak little girl! Train me and show me how to fight! I can help you and that way I know I can protect you." I pleaded with him.
"The answer is no Bella. I will not put your life in danger even if that means I have to give up the chance to be with you, " he said sadly.
He looked heartbroken at the thought of having to give up the chance to be with me if it means keeping me safe. I knew at that moment that I won't win this fight and even if I did I would lose him and would that really be winning?
"Ok Edward, I won't go into the Unknown but I still want you to train me." I relented.
"Why do you want to be trained so badly Bella?" he asked in an exasperated tone.
"Because I think it will help me with my magic and with controlling my mark. It takes a lot out of me and I figure if I'm fit I'd better able for it." I reasoned. Truth is I will find a way into the Unknown so that I can keep an eye on him, I don't bloody care how dangerous it is.
"Fine Bella, I will train you. We can come up with a schedule in the morning. Let's just get some sleep for now." he said through a yawn. He looked so cute when he was sleepy with his hair hanging on his face and his lips extra pouty.
"Ok, fine we can talk more in the morning. I actually have a few questions for you." I said and kissed those sexy pouty lips. Edward pulled away before I could deepen the kiss. I wonder how long it'll take to convince him I want more too and that I would try to open up to him.
"Good night love," he whispered and kissed my head as he pulled the covers over us. I sat up and took off my bra. I hated sleeping in a bra. It just felt unnatural. I took off my yoga pants next. I was left in only my tank top and black lacy panties that only covered half my ass. I heard Edward take a sharp breath and I turned to look at him.
"You don't mind me sleeping like this do you? I feel uncomfortable sleeping with pants and a bra on." I asked in an innocent voice. I was sure as hell not going to make this easy on him. He was staring down at my legs and then cleared his throat.
"No, its fine just unexpected. Hope you don't mind, but I can't sleep in anything other than just my boxers," he said with a sneaky grin. Yeah, I don't think I'll be sleeping tonight. I watched him strip of into nothing but a pair of red cotton boxers. Damn that man is fine. I had to check myself before I start panting and drooling.
He pulled me back into his side so that we were spooning. He kept a small bit of space between his hips and my ass since I was sure he didn't want me to feel his erection. He started humming a lullaby in my ear and before I knew it I was fast asleep in Edward's arms. I slept like a baby in his arms. I woke up the next morning well slept but frustrated as hell. I turned my head and peaked up at Edward. He was breathing evenly and was clearly still fast asleep. I couldn't stand the ache between my legs anymore. I'm desperately horny and if Edward won't have sex with me I'll have to take care of it myself. I figured I'd take a hot shower and get myself off but as I tried to wiggle free from Edward's arms he pulled me flush against his bare chest and I could feel his hard cock pressing against my lower back. I could feel a shiver go down my back and I let out a soft moan. I tried moving again, but he only tightened his hold. I looked over to see if I had woken him up, but he was still fast asleep. Guess even in his sleep he was afraid I'd leave.
I had no other choice but to just do it here next to him while he's asleep. I was so horny I couldn't wait any longer, the ache was too much. I carefully manage to spread my legs apart enough so that I could move my hand freely between them. I moved one hand to my breast and massaged it and started pulling and pinching my nipple softly as I moved my other hand down my body. Am I really going to do this? I was getting nervous, what if Edward wakes up? What would he think? Before I could think anymore my fingers brushed over my clit and I had to bite back a moan. Fuck I was so sensitive and it felt so good to be touched even if it's by myself. I kept pinching my nipple as my fingers were rubbing circles over my clit. I turned my head into the pillow to silence my moans. I slipped a finger inside my pussy and used the heel of my hand to keep rubbing my clit. I moved my finger in and out slowly and then added a second finger and started thrusting them in harder and faster. I slipped in a third finger, it felt so fucking tight and good. I imagined it was Edward's cock pounding into me from behind. My fingers started moving faster and I was on the edge of exploding. I could feel the burn in my stomach. I pinched my nipple hard and fell over the edge screaming Edward's name.
I was trying to calm down after that. After a minute or four my breathing started to slow down and then I realized I screamed Edward's name when I came and it wasn't into the pillow. I slowly turned my head towards him. He was staring at me with wide lustful eyes and an open mouth. Guess waking up to a woman screaming your name as she cums would shock you. I could feel my blush spread all over my face and down to my chest. Edward's eyes followed my blush down to my boobs and he licked his lips. He fucking licked his lips! I let out a moan and his eyes snapped back to me. Without a word he got out of bed and headed for the bathroom. After a minute, I heard the shower turn on. I wondered if he was getting himself off in the shower. Did he have his big hand wrapped around his cock stroking it as he pictured me?
I slowly made me way to the bathroom. I wanted to get him off or at least watch him do it himself. For some reason, I found the thought of watching Edward stroke his big hard cock very erotic and a major turn on. The bathroom was covered in steam by now which made it hard to see. I walked towards the shower when I heard Edward groan. Fuck that is one of my favorite sounds and I want to see how many time I can get him to do it again. I stripped naked and slowly got into the shower. Edward turned around as I got in. He was looking at me in shock and a little embarrassed as he had his cock in his hand. Without a word I pushed him against the shower wall and kissed him hungrily. The kiss was filled with so much heat and passion that I was getting dizzy. When we needed to breathe I moved my lips to his jaw and started kissing down his jaw to his neck, down his chest as I slowly got to my knees.
Edward was staring at me with hooded eyes. I grabbed his cock in my hand and wrapped it around it. His cock is amazing. It is big and thick and hard as a rock but with a soft layer of skin covering it. I kissed the tip as I stroked down. Edward moaned and tangled his hand in my hair. I pulled the tip of his cock into my mouth and swirled my tongue around it as I stroked up. I continued sucking and swirling the head as I stroked his cock. His breathing was becoming swallow and I knew he was getting close. Time to step up the game. I looked up into his eyes as I took all of his cock into my mouth till I felt it hit the back of my throat and then I sucked and pulled back up and swirled my tongue around his head. I kept doing this while looking up at him. He was controlling the speed of my movements by pulling and pushing on my head. When he was close he put both of his hands in my hair and held my head still as he pushed his cock in and out of my mouth. He was fucking my mouth and I let out a loud moan that vibrated against his cock and that cause him to cum down my throat. I swallowed all of it and gave his cock one last kiss. Edward's breathing was erratic and as I got up he pushed me against the wall and gave me a kiss that made my toes curl. Before we could deepen the kiss the water went cold and we had to get out.
"Fuck Bella that was amazing." he said as he leaned into my ear.
"But next time you want someone to touch your pussy, it better be me." he purred in my ear and smacked my ass before he walked back into the bedroom. I was left standing in utter shock. Maybe my little show put him in the mood to give in and sleep with me. A girl can hope. I quickly got ready in the bathroom, brushing my teeth and hair while putting on a small bit of makeup. I went out into the bedroom and found Edward has already dressed. He kissed me as he went back into the bathroom to finish up. I hoped he doesn't shave as he had a bit of stubble and it was sexy as hell. I quickly put on my favorite white sundress and grabbed navy flats and a red cardigan. I looked myself over in the mirror and decided it will do. Edward came out of the bathroom a few minutes later freshly shaven and I was a bit disappointed. I could just picture how good his stubble would've felt against my thighs.
"You ready to go love?" he asked as he grabbed his bag. He looked so sexy in his black jeans and fitted white t-shirt. He hair was skillfully styled mess, but his eyes were brighter than usual and I hope I was the reason behind that. I grabbed my bag and gave him a peck as we headed for the door. We walked to the main building hand in hand not caring who sees us. After what happened yesterday I figured everyone knows about us by now so what was the point in hiding it. I have to say there were a lot of people staring and a lot of girls glaring at me. I could practically hear them sneer at me. I thought we were going to go get coffee at Billy's, but Edward was leading me towards the administration quarters.
"Edward where are we going?" I asked as I was in desperate need of coffee.
"We are going to go file a complaint about yesterday and request a new roommate for you." he said as we entered into a waiting area.
It took about 20 minutes to get the complaint and new roommate assignment paperwork done thanks to Edward's help. I had to tell him twice that he can't put down that I request him to be my roommate even though I wanted that badly. We needed to head off as we would be late for our lectures and I didn't want to miss my first lecture on Introduction to Spells. I gave Edward a quick kiss and promised to meet him at Billy's after my lecture. I ran to my lecture and found that Emmett had saved me a seat. I haven't spoken to him since yesterday's debacle so things were a little weird. I took my seat next to him and heard the lecturer clear her throat.
"Thank you for finally joining us Miss Swan." she said in a musical voice. Behind her on the big blackboard she had written her name written in white chalk. Esme Cullen. Fuck. My. Life.
And Bella meets the mother...