Chapter Sixty-Two

"If you want to argue with me, let's not do it here," the mage had said as they'd walked out of the kid's bedroom. And Kurogane had every intention of arguing.

"Rooftop," he said, placing a hand on the magician's shoulder. "Five minutes. Meet me there."

"Fine." Fai shook off his hand as if it was nothing more than a minor annoyance. Bastard. Kurogane grabbed his coat off the rack and walked out the door, barely resisting the urge to slam it behind him. The last thing he needed was for the princess to come poking around, wondering why he was so furious.

Last thing he needed was to tip the kid off that he and the mage were about to argue over him.

He jammed his hands in his pockets, nose twitching from the scent of cigarette smoke and stale piss in the lobby, and stepped into one of the elevators, jabbing the top button and waiting for the doors to shut behind him. Slowly, he ascended to the rooftop, anger rolling down his back in waves. The whole situation rankled—the kid's reaction, the blood dripping down his knuckles after knocking the door down, the mage looking at him as if it was his fault the kid was having panic attacks now. I ought to knock some sense into that bastard, he thought, striding through the elevator doors as they parted. The kid needs me. I'm the only one who can get through to him.

His mind flickered back to how the princess had sat at the edge of the bed. How she'd held the kid's hand until he'd calmed. The certainty of a moment ago morphed into something else. No, he wasn't the only one who could get through to the kid. But for the longest time, he'd been the only one who'd bothered. How could the mage—how could anyone ignore that?

Behind him, the elevator doors opened. Kurogane turned, forcing himself to calm down, to face this argument rationally. His words still sliced the air like a steel blade. "Why won't you let me take care of him?"

Fai's voice was just as frigid. "I don't trust you."

"And you think I'm going to hurt him while you're standing outside the door?"

"He did go into a panic attack after you showed up."

"That wasn't my fault!" he exploded, taking some satisfaction at the way the mage flinched. "You think I wanted that? You think I was even fucking expecting it? What those bastards did to him . . . I wanted to kill them for it. If it hadn't been for that curse Tomoyo put on me, I would have carved them all up, bit by bit, just like they were doing to him." Worse, he thought. I'd have done worse. He thought of the jug of bleach that redheaded bastard had been holding when he'd knocked down the door. How much damage it could've done to the kid if he'd taken another second getting there. How much damage it could've done to the monsters who'd intended to use it. They haven't seen a monster until they've seen me. Fury simmered beneath his skin, held in check only by the knowledge that local law enforcement had dealt with them. And the fact that they weren't in striking range.

"That's a little excessive, don't you think?" Fai said.

"What?"

"Carving them up bit by bit. You always struck me as the kind of person to take someone out in one blow."

His lips twisted into a sneer. "Well you'd be wrong." Some people have it coming.

"You're very antagonistic tonight. Is it because you haven't gotten laid in a week, or—"

Kurogane lunged forward, snatching the mage by the collar and yanking him forward. Fai stumbled, grabbing his upper arm as he tried to right himself. Kurogane drew his other arm back, getting ready to smash the blond bastard's face in. Then he froze, knuckles white with the tension in his fist. This is exactly what he figured I'd do, he realized, not sure if he was more shocked or angry that the mage had managed to manipulate him into a physical confrontation. That's why he's not dodging like he always does. He's waiting for me to hit him as proof that I'm not stable enough to deal with the kid right now.

Slowly, he lowered his arm, releasing the mage's collar. Fai straightened, hands brushing against his coat's hood as if he was brushing dirt away. "You did that on purpose," Kurogane said.

"Yes."

He inhaled, exhaled. Regained control. "You're going to have to do better than that."

Fai raised an eyebrow.

"If you want to prove I have no place around the kid, you'll have to be smarter than that. You thought I wouldn't notice that you were ready to take a hit just to prove your point?"

Fai's single eye narrowed. "You're too clever, Kurogane. But I don't need you to prove my point for me. I can do it myself." He advanced half a step, a gust of wind stirring his hair and making it flap like bird wings. "Regardless of whether you'd hit me or not, your reaction proves that you're a slave to your emotions. Particularly anger." His eye flashed gold. "Think about what would've happened if you hadn't stopped when you did."

"I would've hit you. And you had it coming."

"Maybe so. Now think about what you could've done to Syaoran-kun, if his panic attack hadn't startled you."

"I would never hurt him."

"Really?" Fai took another step forward. Stubborn to the marrow, Kurogane held his ground. "Because you left bruises."

Kurogane blinked, derailed. "What?"

"On his arm. After you asked him what was wrong with him. You grabbed him so tight, your fingertips left bruises."

He shook his head. "You're lying."

"You want to see for yourself?"

His stomach bunched up, nausea crashing over him like a wave. "I don't believe you."

"Except you do. Of course you believe me. Don't lie. I've lied too many times not to know what it looks like."

"I'll walk out tonight if that's true."

The corner of Fai's lip twitched. "Will you?"

"Yes." Because he didn't believe it. Couldn't. He would never hurt the kid, not now. "And you can stop looking so damn smug, because if I go, your only food source goes with it."

The mage's eye went flat, cold. "Fine."

"Then show me."

Fai turned and headed toward the elevator, walking briskly through the freezing wind. For some reason, this night felt colder than any Kurogane had experienced in this world. The wind sliced through his coat, biting at his skin until it felt like it would peel away. The nausea—he would not think of it as dread, because there was nothing to dread—churned away inside him.

The elevator descended in silence. They walked through the lobby, and he threw a dark glance at the man behind the check-in desk just for the hell of it. When they reached the stairs leading to their subterranean apartment, Fai paused. "You mean it? You'll leave if you hurt him?"

"I said I would, didn't I?"

"You swear?"

"Yes!"

"Okay." Fai turned and met his gaze. "I lied."

Kurogane stared at him for a long moment, thoughts flashing through his mind almost to quickly to process. Thoughts like What else is new? and Are we going to go or not? and Why the hell isn't he saying anything?

He settled on, "Lied about what?"

"The bruises. I lied. You didn't hurt him."

"You—"

"I was testing you. I wanted to see if you'd actually commit to leaving if you thought it was best for him."

"Bullshit. You're saying that because you don't want to starve."

"Do you really believe that?" Fai asked, his voice still perfectly polite, distant.

Kurogane's hands tightened into fists. No.

"You know what a liar looks like. You've been lying for months, and even though you've justified it over and over again in your mind, it still eats at you. I know. The big lies always do."

"I—"

"How do you suppose Syaoran-kun feels about lying to Sakura-chan?" Fai asked, folding his hands behind his back. "Don't you think he feels awful about it? Don't you think it eats at him, too? That maybe the lies bother him even more than they bother you? Why do you think I told you both to tell Sakura if you kept doing this?"

"You . . . bastard."

"I've been lying all my life, and it still bothers me. It'll hurt someone like Syaoran-kun even more. So either one of you tells Sakura-chan or you stop living the lie. That's the only way I can see this working."

Kurogane's eyebrows slanted downward. Idiot, he thought, unsure if the thought was directed at the mage or at himself. "So the kid's not even hurt. You had me worrying over nothing."

"That's right."

Kurogane's fist shot forward and caught the side of Fai's head. The vampire dropped like a sack of potatoes, unconscious. Kurogane bent over, slung the moron over his shoulder, and carried him down the steps.

Well, he thought, that could've gone worse.