Thank you for continuing to read and I hope you enjoy this latest chapter! Any comments you may have are always appreciated and I read every single one of them!
I do not own the Hunger Ggames nor its characters.
Chapter Fifty-Three
The day of the reaping brings with it heat and despair. As I make my way towards the square I feel so helpless and angry that it takes all of my might not to lash out at someone.
The whole of 12 has gathered but only Peeta and Katniss are standing in the centre of the square with Effie and the Mayor standing on the stage. It's a chilling sight and all I can do is hope that this will be the last reaping to take place in 12 but I'm doubtful. Snow isn't stupid, he's going to do all he can to stifle any more uprisings.
Effie has to do her usual elaborate display of fishing around in the reaping bowl before plucking out Katniss' name, the only strip that's in there, although, to be fair to Effie, she's not as bright as she usually is.
She dips her hand in to the other bowl and calls out my name but as soon as she does Peeta is shouting "I volunteer as tribute!" and climbs up on to the stage before I can even move.
They are both marched in to the Justice Building by peacekeepers and seconds later I find another one is poking a gun in my back and walking me towards the back of the building where Peeta and Katniss are waiting for us.
No one is allowed to say goodbye this year and minutes later we're sat on the train, with Katniss staring idly out of the window as she bids 12 goodbye.
I really want a drink but seeing Katniss so upset spurs me on to remain sober, at least for now. Once they're in the arena I'm not sure I'll be able to get through it without a drink.
Dinner is a somber affair with any attempts at conversation quickly coming to a halt. I know that there's a chance they'll both get out of this alive but, then again, they could both be killed on the first day. I know the Careers would love to have Katniss and Peeta under their list of kills.
"I love your new hair, Effie," says Peeta, nodding towards Effie's golden wig.
"Thank you. I had it especially done to match Katniss' pin. I was thinking we might get you a golden ankle band and maybe find Haymitch a gold bracelet or something so we could all look like a team," says Effie.
"I think that's a great idea," says Peeta, "How about it, Haymitch?"
"Yeah, whatever," I reply.
"Maybe we could get you a wig, too," says Katniss and I shoot her a look to shut her up. She may be able to make jokes but I'm finding it hard when I know she could be dead within days if Plutarch's plan doesn't work.
"Shall we watch the recap of the reapings?" Asks Effie and we all agree.
Peeta fetches a notebook he's been writing information about previous victors in and we all gather on the sofas around the television.
I try not to show any emotion as the reapings are shown, not only do I not want to acknowledge that some of my friends are being sent to their deaths but I don't want Katniss and Peeta to get too attached to them for my sake. I'm still not sure how I feel about losing my friends in order to get Katniss and Peeta out of the arena. I just wish I knew what Plutarch is planning.
Cashmere and Gloss are reaped, a brother and sister who won in consecutive years. I would feel sorry for them if I hadn't seen the vicious way in which they won their Games.
Brutus volunteers for an elderly man from 2 but anyone who knows him knows he hasn't volunteered out of compassion but because the idea of winning two Hunger Games is just far too appealing for him.
Beetee and Wiress are next, followed by Finnick. I bet the women in the Capitol are crying in to their bed sheets. The next name called is Annie and my heart sinks as she starts screaming in terror but I try not to show it.
However, Mags volunteers and hobbles to the stage to join Finnick. Watching this is harder than I thought it would be, it seems like anyone close to me just has a date with death. I know it's not related to me but it's still a difficult emotion to deal with.
As the recap continues through the districts and Johanna, Cecelia, Chaff and Seeder are reaped I can't help but think that a large number of these tributes are part of the rebellion. Does Snow know? Has he rigged the whole thing?
I begin to feel uneasy as we approach 12 and our reaping. The commentator begins to get teary as Peeta joins Katniss on the stage, saddened by the fact that nothing ever seems to go right for these two. Well, whose fault is that, exactly?
Once it's over I head to my room simply to avoid the others rather than to sleep. I know my mind will be filled with horrors if I put my head on that pillow. I order a bottle of wine, hoping it will take the edge off but it doesn't. All my friends could be dead by the end of the month. Mags, who has been like a mother to me all of these years, could be mutilated in front of my eyes and Chaff, who is the closest thing I've had to a brother besides Layle, could be decapitated for the whole of Panem to see. These thoughts and more enter my head throughout the night, the many ways in which those I have grown close to could be killed are the only things I can concentrate on.
I wonder if Plutarch got in touch with them, too. He must have, I can't be the only one who knows there is a plan. None of them seem fazed when their names were read out but, after years of mentoring, I suppose that nothing surprises them. Apart from the Quell announcement, even I didn't see that coming.
When I can no longer handle the visions that haunt my mind I leave the room, order another bottle of wine and hope that a walk around the train will calm me down slightly.
As I head towards the dining cart I can see a light from the lounge and faint voices. I quietly walk over and stand in the doorway to find Katniss and Peeta curled up on the sofa watching a video of my Games.
I shouldn't be surprised, they were bound to be curious, but it still hurts to watch. I've not looked at the footage since my post-Games interview and Snow wasn't especially keen to show replays of me undermining the Capitol to Panem.
Suddenly I'm faced with the sixteen-year old version of myself kneeling down next to Maysilee as blood drips from her neck.
"Win," she whispers and, even now, her words hit me hard in the chest, only now they have a different meaning. It's not the Games I have to win but the war that is inevitably going to come. We have to win for Maysilee and all of the children that met the same fate. We have to.
The video quickly skips over the next two deaths and soon the final fight between me and Opal is playing across the screen. I can remember every move and injury that we sustained but seeing it is a hundred times more horrific, especially as I didn't realise at the time just how much of my guts was spilling out of my stomach.
Opal loses her axe and seconds later it lands in her head and I'm declared the winner.
Peeta switches off the television and he and Katniss sit in silence for a moment.
"That force field at the bottom of the cliff," says Peeta, "It was like the one on the roof of the Training Centre. The one that throws you back if you try to jump off and commit suicide. Haymitch found a way to turn it into a weapon."
"Not just against the other tributes, but the Capitol, too," says Katniss. "You know they didn't expect that to happen. It wasn't meant to be part of the arena. They never planned on anyone using it as a weapon. It made them look stupid that he figured it out. I bet they had a good time trying to spin that one. Bet that's why I don't remember seeing it on television. It's almost as bad as us and the berries!" She starts laughing like a maniac but I can understand why, I bet she never considered the crazy way in which I won.
"Almost, but not quite," I say, taking a large gulp from my bottle and they both snap their heads around to look at me. Something in Katniss' face changes, though. That calculating look is fading and I know what she's thinking because it's the same reason I know what she's thinking. She's finally realised just how similar we really are.
Once we reach the Capitol I clean myself up and head for the Sponsorship Room, even if Plutarch can get them out of the arena alive we're still going to need sponsors until that time comes. I also need to keep up the illusion that there is no plan and I just want to get one of them home.
Unsurprisingly, as soon as I walk in a large group of Capitolites descends upon me, trying to stop themselves from crying. They really are like children with their favourite toys.
"It's just so sad!" Cries one woman with a scarlet wig on that almost touches the ceiling. "Peeta will do anything to protect her!"
"Yes," I agree, "And I know that both of them wants the other to come home so maybe we can make that happen."
"Yes, yes, of course!" She splutters, "Whatever it takes! But that means poor Finnick has to die!" This causes her to burst in to even more tears, if possible, and one of her friends has to console her for a good half hour before she signs any paperwork.
It's a similar story with everyone I speak to that afternoon. Many of them have sponsored the current tributes in their previous Games and having to choose just one is proving too traumatic. I bet Snow never saw this coming.
Plutarch arrives and asks if I want to go for a walk, which I obviously do. We talk about nonsense until we reach the centre of the Capitol where there's a lot of people to cover our voices.
"I've spoken to Beetee, Finnick and Mags," he says, "But I need you to tell the others because I haven't got enough time. I'm still in touch with Thirteen and when the Games begin we will agree on a day and time for one of their hovercrafts to come and rescue as many of the rebels, particularly Katniss, from the arena."
"And how are they doing that exactly?" I ask.
"Beetee has come up with some clever contraption involving a wire, which I'll make sure is in the Cornucopia. When the time is right he'll blow up the force field and we'll be able to fly in. In order for the rebels to know the day and time you will send in bread with the district number indicating the day and the number of rolls the hour. Does that make sense?"
"Yes. So who shall I tell?"
"Chaff, Seeder and anyone else you trust. But I suggest that you don't tell them all the full details in case they are captured."
"Yeah, that's why I'm not telling Katniss and Peeta a thing."
"I agree. I'll talk to you soon," he says, nods his head at me and rushes off in to the crowd.
It's not a perfect plan but nothing ever will be where the Capitol is concerned. At least it's a start and who knows what will happen afterwards? The Districts are already desperate to overthrow Snow and if they see something rebellious on a national television show that can only be a good thing.
I head up to Mags' and Finnick's room, who are both smiling when I get there but there's a sadness tinging their faces. I'm surprised that they're here, to be honest, I thought they'd be stuck in the Remake Centre.
"How are you holding up?" I ask.
"Not too bad," says Mags, "Finnick's been moaning about his costume, though."
"It's literally a knot around my crotch and nothing else!" He exclaims and I guffaw.
"Why aren't you in the Remake Centre?" I ask.
"We didn't see the point," says Finnick, "I've got some very loyal followers and Mags wanted a nap."
I laugh and Mags gives me a big, gummy smile. She's rebellious until the end.
"Listen, I know you probably both know this but the only way Katniss will ever team up with you is if you keep Peeta alive. Her only goal is to get him home and she'll kill anyone who gets in her way."
They both nod and we begin to speculate about what we should tell and to whom. Chaff, Seeder and Johanna obviously need to know everything and Beetee is already in on the plan so there's no need to talk to him. They'll just have to make sure he stays alive, too, otherwise they'll never get out of there.
I spend the rest of the evening banging on people's doors so that I can tell them the plan, I even tell the morphlings that they have to keep Peeta alive. I know they won't tell anyone important and I know that a long time ago they had rebellion in their blood.
I find Chaff towards the end of the afternoon and he's already drunk so I join him and ask about Rue's and Thresh's families, who are thankfully alive. Although I wonder for how long.
After I'm ushered out by Chaff's stylist I head to the Victor's Box and a sudden sense of loneliness overcomes me. There's still a large group of mentors around me but I'm not close to any of them. Even Annie isn't here, after her name was called she went so mad that Finnick refused to let her get on the train.
The Careers are all standing together, laughing and joking whilst I find a chair and a large bottle of white liquor. I would love nothing more than to punch each and every one of them right now.
Soon the anthem is blaring and the first chariot is entering City Circle. They all look ridiculous in their costumes apart from Peeta and Katniss who look simply incredible. Their black outfits look like burning coals and they are completely ambivalent to the crowd.
Here we go, then, I think. Let the seventy-fifth Hunger Games begin.