Ed woke up in the middle of a strange underground town full of brick and wooden buildings and a huge pot full of food in the middle of the town square. The first thing he noticed upon waking up was the smell coming from the cooking pot.
"CHICKEN!" Ed yelled at the scent of one of his favorite foods right next to butter toast and gravy. Ed floated in a trance towards the chicken smell coming towards the pot. As soon as he got to the rim of the pot, he put his hands together and dove headfirst into the chicken stew brewing for the Kaka Clan later that night for dinner. Within 10 seconds, Ed ate half of the pot of stew, then rested right on the side of it, belly twice the normal size./span/p
"HEY! NO ONE TOUCHES THE KAKA'S CLAN FOOD BEFORE DINNERTIME EXCEPT FOR TAO, MEOW!" a cat-like creature in a beige cat-hoodie shouted across the village at Ed. Taokaka, the Kaka Clan's village protector, dashed at the clan's food thief with incredible speed, claws out.
Ed, hearing Tao's yelling, looked up from his rest at the Kaka running at him. "AAAUUUGGGHHH! The Evil Cat Mutant from Litterbox Four is real! She's going to eat my brains and use my bone marrow as a scratching post!" Ed screamed as he started running from Tao.
Unfortunately Tao was way faster than Ed was. She pounced on him within seconds of seeing Ed run. With a sneer, Tao looked at the frightened boy and said "Alright you, why are you trying to steal Tao's food, meow?"
Ed looked at her innocently. "My belly said there was chicken here and it told me to find it. Chicken good for Ed!" He then pleaded "I'm sorry for making you mad, please don't eat my brains!
Tao was confused. "Tao doesn't want to eat Eyebrow Guy's brains! Unless they're made of meat buns.
Tao got off of Ed, not seeing him as a threat now. "Where am I? And where are Eddy and Double Dee?" Ed asked, not really sure where he was or where his friends were. "And what's a meat bun, kitty-girl?"
She was astonished at what she just heard. "You don't know what a meat bun is, meow!? Are you from a different planet?" Tao asked, not believing that there was a living person that didn't know what a succulent meat bun was.
"Is it delicious?" Ed asked, completely forgetting that he was in a place he didn't know.
Tao smiled. "Only the greatest thing ever! Let's go find Good Guy and make him buy us some, meow!" she said enthusiastically as she dragged Ed along to go find Ragna.
Ragna the Bloodedge, the world's most dangerous criminal and with the highest bounty in history on his head, was sleeping in Taokaka's home in the Kaka Village. Tao barged into the house and immediately started shaking Ragna awake. "Good Guy! Me and Eyebrow Guy are hungry! Buy us food, please meow?" Tao asked loudly in his face.
Naturally pissed that someone woke him up from a nap, and even more pissed that she was shaking him awake just for food, Ragna shouted "Tao you idiot! That hurts, dammit!" He then took sight of the tall, dopey-looking boy standing by the bed. "And who's this guy?"
"Not knowing the fact that Ragna was the world's most dangerous criminal and was pissed about being awake, Ed, in his happy-go-lucky voice, said "Hello, my name is Ed. Nice to meet you, Good Guy."
Ragna just sighed at being called Tao's nickname by someone else. "It's not 'Good Guy,' Tao just calls me that because she's too dumb to remember my real name. My name's Ragna. Ragna the Bloodedge."
"C'mon Good Guy, let's go get some food neow!" Tao said impatiently, her tail wagging.
Ragna thought 'Tao's never going to shut up until I get food with her. And now I have to pay for this random guy's meal too. Who is this guy, anyways?' "Alright Tao, Ed, let's go."
At the restaurant, Ragna wasn't surprised that Tao could eat ten bowls of food versus his one or two, but he was amazed that there was someone who could match Tao's appetite. Ed had as many bowls stacked up on the table as she had. Ragna took the opportunity to start asking some questions now that the two finally stopped eating and racking up his bill, much to his disdain. "Alright Ed, now that you've stopped mauling all the food I paid for, let me ask you, who are you and where did you come from?"
Ed paused his eating for a second to think about the situation at hand. "My pals Double Dee and Eddy were using some machine in our school's science fair. They used a magnet to take my thermos from me and some of my hot cocoa spilled on it, making the machine act funny and create a portal that the three of us went into. Then I woke up in the village alone and hungry." Ed said, trying hard to remember everything that had happened in the last few hours.
The white-haired criminal tried to think of any way that Ed could get sent back to his dimension. He had one idea, but he really tried to think of every alternative to that option. Eventually he gave up. "I have no clue how to get you back, so I guess I'll have to ask the Rabbit to help us out," Ragna sighed.
"There's talking bunnies here too? I LOVE this place!" Ed said joyfully.
Ragna facepalmed. "No dipshit, that's just the nickname I give a certain annoying, bloodsucking vampire."
"Annoying, bloodsucking vampire? I beg your pardon?" A voice said from behind Ragna.
"Yeah, an annoying bloodsu-" Ragna paused as soon as he turned around to see Rachel Alucard, a vampire girl that had the appearance of a 12-year-old dressed up in gothic lolita fashion and two long blonde pigtails, giving him a death stare. Next to her were her familiars Nago, a large black cat, and Gii, an overweight, red bat. Knowing what she was about to do next, they backed off, terrified.
"BADEN BADEN LILY!" she yelled as Ragna got struck with a small lightning bolt. Within a split second, Ragna was shocked unconscious.
Tao and Ed were a little scared at what it is that Rachel just did to their friend and feared that they were next. As tactless as ever, Ed immediately asked "Um, scary vampire girl, why did you just shock Ragna?"
Rachel looked Ed's way, which made him shrink back a little bit. "This dog does not know when to stop barking. Now do you mind telling me who you are and why you are prancing around with this foolish creature and Tao?"
Ed looked a little sheepish at telling her who he was, but he said "I am Ed! I came here after being sucked into a portal and being separated from my friends. I met Tao and Ragna in the village underground. Who are you?"
"My name is Rachel Alucard, head of the Alucard family. I had heard that this idiot of a man was considering asking for my help for something. Would you mind informing me of what it is that you need from me? I am quite busy and do not have time for petty things."
Tao chimed in "Eyebrow Guy needs help finding his friends and getting home. Can the Scary Bunny Lady help?"
"I will not answer yes or no until I am fully aware of the situation at hand here," Rachel said firmly. "Ed, can you please explain all of the events leading up to you coming here? I think I may be able to deduce the problem we are having here and how we can rectify it," she inquired.
Ed then explained everything that happened, starting with the science fair, his friends, the super-magnet creating the force field and portal, and then waking up in the Kaka Village, where he got attacked by Tao over the food. "And then Ragna treated Tao and me to a meal! Isn't that so nice?" Ed mused.
Naturally assuming that there had to be some kind of ulterior motive for Ed and his friends to appear in this world and not by chance, Rachel considered the possibility of this being a possible continuum shift. 'I hate to subject myself to this fool's dilemma, but I fear that not taking action will bring doom to us all. I will help him.' Rachel thought. "I suppose I will assist you in any way I am able to, Ed. However, I have an idea on where to start looking for one of your friends." Rachel looked over at Ragna, who was still unconscious. She smacked him awake with one quick strike of her hand.
"What the hell was that for, bunny-leech?" Ragna asked, annoyed.
"Silence, fool! I am going to help you three find Ed's friends and get them transported to their dimension as soon as possible, as I fear that there is a reason they may have all been brought here." She turned to Ed. "Ed, I assume since one of your friends had built this machine that you had described, he must have many interests in math and science, yes?"
"Oh, that's Double Dee!" Ed answered.
"Now that we have that information to go off of, I would suggest the three of you start venturing towards Kokonoe's lab, since that has the only source of scientific equipment and theories in all of Kagutsuchi. It is likely that he would be there to try and make some kind of contraption to get you all home."
Ragna was confused. "Wait Rachel, can't you just teleport them all to their world instead?"
"The princess is not a god you twit!" Nago said condescendingly. "Even she has limits to her pow- OOOOWWWWW! That hurt, princess!" he yelled as Rachel smacked him in the face.
"Shut your filthy mouth lest I sew it shut," Rachel warned him. "As for your question, Ragna, even I can only do so much when it comes to teleporting. It is true I could teleport us anywhere in this dimension, even near the Boundary. But I cannot teleport to different dimensions. The most that I can do would be to help direct you all in the right directions while observing you." She led them all out of the restaurant and pointed in a direction. "You will go in this direction towards Kokonoe's laboratory. I have good reason to believe you may find one of your friends there. As for the other one, I am not quite sure what to say. Time will tell."
"Thanks ma'am! DOUBLE DEE! ED IS COMING!" Ed yelled as he started to run in the direction Rachel pointed.
"Eyebrow Guy, wait for me and Good Guy!" Tao called after Ed.
Rachel turned towards Ragna. "Ragna, I fear that there is a reason they have appeared in this dimension. Do be careful," she said as she teleported away. Ragna snorted.
"This is going to be a rough couple of days, I can feel it," Ragna sighed as he chased Tao and Ed.