Olivia rolled over in bed, trying to untangle herself once again from Elliot's arms. She still wasn't used to always sleeping with someone else, especially someone who wanted to be so close all night long. Even when she'd lived with Brian he was content to roll over and sleep on the opposite side of the bed, when he was home at night, which was seldom anyway. She mentally kicked herself for thinking about Brian now…she was sure Elliot would love to know she was thinking about her ex as she tried to escape his grasp in the middle of the night.

"What are you doing?" Elliot whispered, not even opening his eyes, as she finally managed to sit on the side of the bed. "Are you okay?"

She sighed, frustrated at waking him up once again, "I'm fine…I have to go to the bathroom."

"Oh…" he drifted off, like he usually did once he realized nothing was wrong.

She stood up, shivering a little when her bare feet touched the cold wooden floor. Elliot's house was drafty and the blustery wind outside seemed to seep through every window and crack, leaving the house frigid. She could feel the goosebumps prickling her skin and rubbed her bare arms trying to warm up. She wished she'd brought something warmer than a t-shirt and yoga pants to sleep in, but it was too late for that now. She walked toward the bathroom, stopping at Kate's room and glancing inside to make sure Noah was still in bed and asleep. She'd been worried about leaving him in the toddler bed instead of a crib, but so far he seemed to be fine. She was afraid he might be cold, but when she walked over to check on him, he felt just as warm as always. Maybe she was the only one who was freezing half to death in Elliot's refrigerator of a house. Maybe she just missed the familiar warmth of her little apartment.

She noticed the soft glow of a light under a door down the hall from the bathroom, and she could hear voices inside. If she hadn't needed to pee so badly, she would've walked there instead, determined to find out what the conversation was about, knowing in her heart it was about her. Once the kids knew about her relationship with their father, and about the baby she was carrying, the rest of the evening had been uncomfortable at best. No one mentioned it to her, but as she arranged presents under the tree she could feel their judgmental stares. Even Maureen seemed less herself around her, here in the house with the rest of the Stablers, and Olivia couldn't help but be frustrated that Elliot seemed oblivious to it all. He had gone about the rest of the night as if nothing had changed.

She walked out of the bathroom, but instead of heading back to Elliot's room she walked toward the room where she knew his kids were talking. It was Maureen's room and Elizabeth was supposed to be sharing it with her for the holidays, but she could hear Richard's voice as well. They were all in there, and while she knew they had every right to talk about what was happening, to commiserate with one another…she felt an overwhelming need to know what they were saying. She wasn't usually so nosy…so self-conscious or suspicious. Maybe she could blame it on her hormones.

The cold floor creaked beneath her feet, reminding her once again how much she disliked the old house. She was afraid they might have heard her, but obviously they hadn't because when she stood outside the door she could hear everything and they weren't even trying to be quiet about it.

"I think Dad's been screwing her for years," Richard said. "You know Mom used to be worried about it. That's why she left him so many times."

"I don't think so," Maureen argued. "Really…Olivia was surprised when I showed up to interview for the nanny job. She asked me about Dad and Mom. She didn't know about the divorce, she didn't know about Kathleen…Dad had pretty much cut her out of his life."

"Then why the hell would she want him back now?" Richard asked.

"Maybe she loves him," Elizabeth suggested.

"Maybe she should think about the consequences of letting him into her life," Richard snapped. "Maybe she should think about how much it's going to hurt her kids when he decides their life isn't good enough for him anymore…"

"Not everyone hates him like you do," Elizabeth argued. "I don't even know why you hate him so much. You were always his favorite."

"I don't hate him," Richard sighed. "I just…I don't know why he never felt like we were enough for him. He only came back to Mom because of Eli. You know that, right? And after Kathleen died, he let himself wallow in guilt for so long that he locked the rest of us out."

"He was hurting," Maureen said sadly. "We all were. You can't hate him forever because he had a hard time dealing with everything. It doesn't mean he didn't love us…"

"But now he's going to have this new family," Richard said sadly.

"So you're jealous?" Elizabeth asked. "Grow up…"

"I'm not jealous," he insisted. "I'm sad for them. Lizzie, do you really think Dad is going to be husband and father of the year all of the sudden? And what if he is this fabulous father and doting husband? What does that say about us?"

"He loves us," Maureen insisted. "He doesn't always know how to show it…but he does."

"It'd be nice if he could show it though," Elizabeth added. "When I was little…he used to try…but it's been a long time. I feel like he's been depressed for years…even before Kathleen."

"He has," Maureen agreed. "But I do think he's doing better. Olivia is good for him…"

Olivia stood outside the door, her heart breaking for them. Elliot's kids didn't hate her or the baby. They'd been hurt by their father and it really had nothing to do with her at all. She knocked softly on the door, hoping they would hear her before she chickened out. She wasn't sure why, but she knew she needed to talk to them and this seemed just as good a time as any. Elizabeth opened the door, surprised to see her standing there, "Olivia?" she asked. "What are you doing here?"

"I was in the bathroom and I saw the light," she forced a smile. "Can I come in?"

Elizabeth opened the door and Olivia walked in, looking at Richard and Maureen who were sitting on the bed. Elizabeth sat on the floor next them and as they stared at her, Olivia suddenly realized she had no idea what to say. She swallowed, trying to force the right words to come out of her mouth, but they didn't come.

"How long were you standing out there?" Richard asked.

"A while," she admitted. "I guess I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I didn't want to ruin your Christmas…" She tried to hold back her tears, not wanting to cry in front of them. That was the last thing they needed to see.

"You aren't ruining Christmas," Maureen insisted. "We love having you here."

"I heard the things you were saying," she admitted. "About your dad. I know having me here is just a reminder of all the ways you feel betrayed by him," she quickly wiped away a tear that was sliding down her cheek. "He loves you…all of you…I promise you that."

"Olivia…" Richard looked at her standing there crying and he knew it wasn't his dad who had hurt her, but him and he felt terrible about it. He stood up, "Sit down," he said sadly. She took his place on the bed and he sat on the floor by his sister. "We aren't blaming you for this," he promised. "But it's hard…"

"I know," she said softly. "But I want you to know that your dad wants to be here for you. He feels awful about how things have been with all of you…he wants to do better. And this baby…she doesn't change the relationship he wants to have with all of you."

"We know that," Maureen insisted. "You shouldn't be worrying about us…"

"I do worry about you," Olivia added. "I love you too…all of you."

"Aren't you afraid Dad will walk out on you and Noah and this baby?" Richard asked.

"That's not fair…" Maureen argued with her brother. "Don't say things like that to her."

"It's okay," Olivia sighed. "I think it's a reasonable question." She looked at Richard, "I don't think he will…but I guess there's no way to know for sure. I know he's had problems. I know about the depression…he's battled that for years, long before he split with your mom the first time. I know he's brooding and angry and unpredictable…and I know that isn't always easy to live with," she took a deep breath, "But he's also kind hearted and loving and he has this intrinsic need to do the right thing. I've been where you are…" she said sadly. "I've regretted him and questioned whether he is really and truly capable of loving anyone anymore and wondered what the hell I've gotten into here," she said seriously. "But I love him. And as much as I was sure I could do this pregnancy and motherhood thing all by myself…he's made it so much easier. I need him…"

"I'm excited about the baby," Elizabeth smiled. "I never thought there'd be another Stabler girl around here."

Olivia laughed a little, "She came as quite a surprise to me too, Lizzie." She let her hand rest on her stomach, "But I love her too."

"We all love her," Richard gave a slight smile. "Just because I'm questioning some of Dad's choices…I don't want you to think that means I don't love my new baby sister."

Olivia nodded, "I know it isn't easy…but I know you love her."

Elizabeth stood up and hugged Olivia, "Can I feel…the baby?" she asked putting her hand softly on Olivia's stomach.

"She's not moving around yet…not to where I can feel it anyway," Olivia put her hand on top of Elizabeth's. "I'd love to feel her kick…so I don't just feel fat all the time," she laughed. "But the doctor said she might not ever move very much. Downs babies just don't have the muscle tone and strength to kick really hard…"

"Downs babies…" Elizabeth looked shocked and Olivia looked to Maureen, and her face let her know that Elliot hadn't told the twins everything about the baby.

"I thought your dad told you," Olivia sighed. "I'm sorry…"

"He should've told them," Maureen added. "I think he was worried it would just add more stress on top of everything else."

"Yeah…" Olivia nodded. "I can see that…"

"The baby has Down syndrome?" Richard asked. "Is she going to be okay?"

"So far, she looks healthy," Olivia gave a weak smile. "They do an ultrasound every couple of weeks to check her heart…that's their biggest concern right now, but so far they haven't found anything. And she's not too small…she's growing steadily, which was another concern…"

"Are you okay?" Elizabeth asked.

"I'm good," Olivia insisted. "It's hard sometimes, because I can't help but worry about her…"

"What are you worrying about?" Richard asked seriously. "About her heart…"

"That…and about how she'll be when she gets older…if she'll have friends…if people will make fun of her…" she brushed away a few more tears. "I worry about if she'll be able to take care of herself when she grows up…and what will happen to her when your dad and I aren't here anymore…"

"Don't worry about that," Elizabeth said seriously. "We'll take care of her Olivia. If she needs someone, she has all of us…"

"That's sweet of you to say," Olivia squeezed her hand.

"She's our sister," Richard added. "Of course we'd be there for her. Liz is right…that should never be something you have to worry about."

"Your dad was right," she smiled. "He said her brothers and sisters wouldn't let her down. He knew how much you'd love her."

"He said that?" Richard asked.

Olivia nodded, "Yeah…he knows he hasn't always been the best father…but he couldn't be more proud of all of you. He knows he's lucky." She stood up, "I need to get back to bed," she sighed. "I want to check on Noah one more time anyway…"

"Olivia…you know we love Noah too, right?" Maureen added. "He can always count on us too…always…"

"I know that," she nodded, walking out the door. "Goodnight…" She walked down the hall, stopping once more to check on her sleeping son and Elliot's granddaughter. If she married him, Kate would be her granddaughter too…and she couldn't help but feel amused at the idea of having a little granddaughter who was slightly older than her own babies. A year ago she'd been sitting in a therapist's office trying to recover from the most horrific thing she'd ever gone through, not knowing if she'd ever really and truly feel like a whole person again…and now here she was with the family she never thought she'd have and it felt like a dream. She was afraid she'd wake up and it would all be gone.

She walked back to Elliot's room, climbing into bed and trying to pry the blankets away from him, but he wouldn't release his grasp on them. "El…" she tapped him and he mumbled something she couldn't understand. "El…I'm freezing," she said as she pulled at the blankets. He rolled over, barely opening his eyes to look at her and tossing the blankets toward her. "You should stop being such a cheapskate and turn the heat up," she teased. She snuggled down under the blankets, and he pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her, while they both drifted back to sleep.