I was surprised to see so many reviews already from that last chapter. I can see there is some debate over who is to blame for their issues...Elliot or Olivia? I think its safe to say they are both stubborn and that they both could stand to look at things from the other's point of view once in a while, but that's just kind of how they are. They are good at sabotaging their own happiness.

Anyway...thanks for the reviews. Here is some more...

New Year's Eve was one of the craziest days of the year working SVU and Olivia hated every moment of it. She always had, even before this year when her own life was practically in shambles, but this year especially it seemed to be getting to her more than usual. The squad room had been full all day, bustling with people coming in to file reports and phone calls requesting they go to one crime scene or another throughout the day. The whole city seemed to fall apart on New Year's Eve. Hours ago she had called Maureen, asking her if she could keep Noah the rest of the day because she wasn't going to make it home in time, and Maureen had agreed, but asked if she could take him with her to Queens. Kate's father was coming to pick her up for the rest of the week, part of their custody agreement and so Olivia had no choice but to agree. She dreaded driving to Queens to pick him up, mainly because she knew facing Elliot would be hard, but they'd been talking on the phone and things seemed to be okay now, so maybe it was time she put aside her pride. Maureen told her not to worry about driving out so late at night to get him, to wait until morning, and as much as Olivia hated to spend New Year's Eve without her little boy, she had to agree going out on this night in New York City was too stupid a mistake to make right now.

She sat down at her desk, twisting her head to the side to try to relieve some of the pressure in her neck and arching her back a little to adjust it. It was already ten at night and she'd been at work since before six that morning. Sixteen straight hours was starting to take it's toll on her and even though Fin had made her take a nap in the cribs earlier, she was still worn out. She felt like the night would never end. The knock at her door made her forget her misery for a minute and she looked up to motion Amanda Rollins in, "Sergeant…" she said, her voice tired making her southern accent more pronounced. "I'm gonna head down the street and get some decent coffee. That crap out there isn't cutting it anymore."

"Okay," Olivia nodded. "I wish I could send you home. I know you've been here for hours."

"I don't mind," Amanda insisted. "I didn't have big plans tonight anyway." She smiled. "You want anything while I'm out?"

"I'd kill for some real coffee too," Olivia sighed, "But since I can't have that, I guess there's nothing else you can get me."

Amanda laughed, "I could never be pregnant…the caffeine withdrawal would do me in." She pushed open the door just as Fin walked in, "I'm going to get coffee…you want some?" she asked.

"That'd be great," he agreed. Then she left and he looked at Olivia, "Time for you to go home," he ordered and she looked at him with surprise.

"Yeah right," she snickered. "We've got people out on three cases right now and four people sitting out there waiting to give statements." She picked up a file from her desk and started to walk past him, "I need to get back out there. I just came in to get this."

He stopped her, looking seriously at her, "You're going home," he said again. "It's not your choice."

"Like hell it's not," she argued. "You might be second in command, but I'm still CO and I don't take orders from you."

"After what happened during the Haley Tibbit's case…" he sighed, knowing she wasn't going to give in easily. "I've been given pretty strict orders to keep an eye on you Liv."

"This isn't like the Tibbit's case, Fin," she said. "I'm fine…"

"It's been sixteen hours…and that's the max," he reminded her.

"I took a nap in the cribs," she argued.

"Doesn't matter," he grabbed the file from her. "Either you go home, or I have to report it and I don't want to have to do that, Liv. They won't be so lenient this time."

"Go to hell," she sputtered, furious that he'd threaten her like that.

"I know your damn mood swings are brutal, so I'm gonna ignore that and blame it on your hormones," he walked to the door. "I want you out of here in ten minutes or less." He opened the door and then turned back to her, "There's someone out here to see you…"

She was grabbing her coat and looked up, surprised as Fin walked out the door and Elliot stood in his place. "El…what are you doing here?" she asked.

"I wanted to check on you, and Maureen was home so she said she'd watch Eli since she was keeping Noah all night anyway," he admitted. "Can we go somewhere and talk?"

"I have to be out of here in ten minutes or Fin's gonna report me for breaking the rules," she groaned.

"They're enforcing the pregnant cop rule on a night like this?" he asked in disbelief, but grateful as well because he could tell she was worn out.

"Fin is," she snickered. "Apparently he's my protector now."

"Someone has to be," Elliot teased. He watched as she put on her coat, fumbling with the buttons that were obviously not wanting to close around her middle and he smiled, "Looks like you need a new coat."

"Shut up," she stormed out the door, near tears and he knew it was going to be a long night.

He followed her to the elevator and watched as she pushed the button over and over again, as if that would make the doors open sooner. He took hold of her hand, "Give it time," he said.

She grabbed her hand away from him, "Don't touch me," she yelled as the doors opened and they both walked in the elevator.

They stood in silence and he could tell from her face that she wanted to cry, but wouldn't let herself. He wasn't sure if she was upset about being sent home, upset about him showing up there, or just too tired to know what she was upset about, but he felt terrible knowing she was hurting. "Liv…I'm sorry for what I said about the coat. It looks fine…I was just teasing…"

"It's not the coat…" she cried, wishing she could just once hold in her tears when she wanted to.

The elevator opened and they walked out into the lobby. "Then what is it?" he asked.

She shook her head, "Fin made me go home," she sobbed.

He reached over and pulled her toward him, letting her lay her head on his chest while her tears stained his shirt. "It's okay," he rubbed her back and brushed her hair out of her face.

"No it's not," she shook her head sadly. "I'm in charge here…not him. He didn't even ask me what I wanted to do. He told me what to do. And then he had the nerve to say I'm having mood swings…why the hell would he say that to me?"

Elliot had to suppress his laughter at that point. She'd gone from yelling to sobbing and back to yelling in a matter of minutes, and she wondered why someone would accuse her of having mood swings? "Maybe he just meant you're a little emotional right now…"

"So you're on his side," she pushed open the door, walking out into the cold night air.

He reached out and grabbed her, forcing her to look at him, "I am always on your side…always. You know that…" He looked at her face, stained with tears, her cheeks red with cold and his voice quivered, "What is this about…really?"

"I don't even know," she admitted. "I just…I feel like I can't do this…"

"Do what?" Elliot asked.

"This…this whole thing," she cried. "I'm tired…I can't think straight…my back is killing me," she brushed away her tears. "Earlier…I think it was maybe twelve hours into the shift, I went in the bathroom and when I looked in the mirror I didn't even recognize myself. My face is so worn…I have lines I didn't even know were there…and my hair has strands of gray in it that I can't even color over because of the pregnancy…I look as miserable as I feel." She watched him, trying to determine if he was as disgusted with her and she was with herself, but he just stared at her and didn't do or say anything. "Last night…I was giving Noah his bath," she sighed. "And I was sitting on the floor, just like always…but when it was time to get him out, I went to stand up and it was hard." She cried, "It's never been hard before, El. I felt so awkward and off balance…and I had to use the side of the tub to pull myself up." She paused sadly, "I've never had to do that before…"

"Liv…you're pregnant," he reminded her, not really knowing what else to say.

"I'm old and pregnant," she sputtered. "And everyone thinks I'm gonna break…hell even I do sometimes…and that's why Fin made me go home, even though they still needed help. That would never have happened if I was thirty."

"Maybe not," he agreed. "But that doesn't mean you're old. It just means this pregnancy is a little more high risk so we have to take some precautions. He was trying to look out for you and our daughter. I can't be angry with him for that and you shouldn't be either."

"I'm not mad at him," she sighed. "I'm mad at myself…because I want to be one of those women who wears cute little maternity clothes and goes to prenatal yoga and joins the Mommy and Me classes…but I can't do those things."

"Of course you can…" Elliot promised her. "You're being too hard on yourself."

She shook her head, "I can't. All the maternity clothes made me look like an old lady trying to cling to her youth. And I tried to go to prenatal yoga, but they told me I had to get my doctor to sign a waiver releasing them of any liability because of my age…and I took Noah to Mommy and Me once on my day off, and all the other mothers were half my age." She cried, "And all of that reminds of this baby…and how she's going to suffer the rest of her life because I chose to have her now, instead of when I was younger."

He held her close, and he remembered Kathy telling him on Christmas Eve that Olivia was not young and that this pregnancy can't be easy on her. And while he knew she blamed herself for the baby's Down syndrome, he hated to admit he hadn't realized just how hard everything else was. "Liv…I know this isn't easy…but you can do this. And I'm going to help you. I'll stay here in the city with you from now on. I promise…"

"I know you were right about my apartment," she sighed. "But I can't take even one more change right now…I just can't."

"It's okay…we'll work it out," he held her close. "We have plenty of time to decide where to live before the baby comes. And for now, I want you to be as comfortable as possible. I know you don't like my house."

"It's a nice house," she said. "But you've had this whole lifetime there that I was never a part of…and even though I know she doesn't live there anymore…when I'm there, I feel like a guest in Kathy's house."

He knew he should've realized that before now. "I'm sorry," he said. "I don't want you to ever feel like that…because wherever we are…that's home, for both of us, Liv. As long as we're together."

"Your daughter is starving…" she looked at him, and forced a smile, not really wanting to talk anymore.

He kissed her gently on the cheek. "You don't have to change the subject, Liv. It's okay if you need a break from talking about all this. All you have to do is say that."

She nodded, "I do need a break…but we can talk more later," she promised. "Besides, I am really hungry…"

He laughed, and nodded, "Okay…" he took her hand and they walked down the street, "Let's go feed this hungry baby…and her beautiful mommy."