Thanks again to everyone who has reviewed the last couple of chapters. I'm glad that for the most part, the feedback has been positive. It means a lot to me when you take time to share your thoughts. I'm glad no one is too disappointed with how long this story has become. I'll be winding it down soon...but for me that could still be 50 chapters...LOL! Thanks again for the motivation to keep writing.
Olivia looked as the red numbers on the doctor's office scale steadily rose and sighed miserably. She'd never been one to worry about the number on the scale, but then again she'd never had to. Sure her weight had fluctuated some over the years, but it had always been reasonable and she'd never worried about it. Now all she could do was worry. She wasn't sure how she could physically gain any more weight, and she was afraid premature labor was inevitable. The baby already had health issues, and an emergency birth before her due date would only make things worse.
"You've gained two pounds," the nurse said gently. "That's not bad…especially with the added fluid."
"Yeah," Olivia said with an anxious shrug. "I'll try to forget that I passed up the recommended weight gain for a full-term pregnancy two weeks ago…"
The nurse had her sit down and put the blood pressure cuff around her arm. "How have you been feeling? Other than the weight gain…"
Olivia shrugged, "Tired…achy…I feel like I can't breathe very well most of the time."
"And headaches or dizziness?" the nurse asked as she wrote in her chart.
"Not really," Olivia sighed. "I've been staying in bed…like the doctor said. Surely my blood pressure is lower now, right?"
"It's still high," the nurse gave her a sad smile. "I'm sorry…"
Olivia shook her head in defeat, "Be honest with me…is this because of my age? Or is the extra amniotic fluid…the weight? What the hell is causing this?"
"It could be any of those…or all of them," the nurse answered honestly. "But you're doing all you can. Just hang in there."
"I'm worried about my baby," Olivia admitted.
"I know," the nurse handed her a gown and patted her shoulder. "Put this on, and the doctor will be in soon."
Olivia waited for the nurse to leave and then she changed into the gown. She'd been living in her pajamas for a couple of weeks now, so the fact that her maternity clothes were feeling snug didn't go unnoticed. She looked at her body in the mirror, her skin pulled tight over the bulge of her stomach and she wondered what she'd look like after the baby was born. There was no way her skin would ever snap back to normal after this. She didn't want to think about it. She slipped on the gown, tying it as easily as she could, and stared at the step leading up to the exam table. She rolled her eyes, thinking about how overwhelming the idea of climbing up on the table was, and she wondered how she'd gotten to this point.
"Olivia," the doctor smiled as he walked in the door and his voice brought her back from her thoughts. "How're you doing today?"
"Okay, I guess," Olivia sighed.
"Here…let me help you," he took her arm and she leaned on him for balance as she climbed up on the exam table. "Go ahead and lay back," he said softly and she did as he said. The doctor pushed gently on her stomach and took some measurements. "Have you been having any contractions?" he asked.
"No," Olivia answered nervously. "Why? Is something wrong?"
"No…I didn't mean to worry you," the doctor said quickly. "But I do think you'll be feeling some Braxton Hicks soon. I'm surprised you haven't already. They're not really painful, more of a tightening and some pressure. Just breathe through them and use them to practice for the real thing."
"Am I going to have this baby early?" Olivia asked nervously.
"I'm going to be honest with you," he looked seriously at her. "At this point…it looks probable."
"How early?" Olivia asked. "Is she going to be okay?"
"You're thirty-three weeks now," the doctor reminded her. "If you can make it a few more weeks…I think everything will be fine."
"What if I can't?" Olivia asked. "What if I go into labor and have her tomorrow? What happens then?"
"Then we'll take it from there," he forced a smile. "All you can do is try to relax. What do you say we take a look at her?" Olivia nodded and the doctor covered her with a blanket and then lifted her gown for the ultrasound. "There she is," he smiled when the baby appeared on the screen. "I'm thinking she's around four pounds…that's a good weight."
"Is she sucking her thumb?" Olivia asked, staring at the screen with a smile. "I've never seen her do that before on the ultrasound."
"Looks like it," the doctor smiled. "And she looks good. I think she's pretty content."
"Can I have a picture?" Olivia asked. "I want to show her daddy. He'll love seeing her suck her thumb like that."
"Sure," the doctor clicked the buttons to print the pictures. "How's he doing?"
"He's getting better," Olivia answered. "I haven't seen him…but on the phone he's been telling me he's getting stronger. And his memory is better. I want him home before I have the baby."
"Well maybe he'll be home soon," the doctor said softly. "And if you want to go see him…I don't think it'd hurt. Maybe you could stop by there on your way home. Just this once…then get yourself home and in bed to rest."
"Really?" Olivia asked in disbelief.
"You're already out and about," the doctor reminded her. "Just keep it short and make sure you're sitting down during the visit. It should be fine."
"Thank you," Olivia cried.
Thirty minutes later they were driving to the rehab center and Amanda looked at Olivia anxiously, "You know, Nick and Fin are gonna kill me for this? I was supposed to take you to the doctor and back home."
"It'll be fine," Olivia promised. "The doctor said I could go." She looked at the ultrasound photo in her hand and smiled, "Elliot will be so happy…"
Amanda couldn't help but smile. She hadn't seen Olivia this happy in weeks so maybe it would do her good to visit Elliot. She glanced back at Noah who was asleep in his car seat. She knew Fin brought Noah up to see Elliot a couple of times a week, but Olivia's contact with him had been limited to phone calls for a couple of weeks now. "So…the doctor said the baby's doing okay?" she asked.
Olivia nodded, "Yeah…she's good. And I'm doing okay considering…at least when he did my exam he said I wasn't dilating any. That's a good sign." She didn't want to tell anyone that even though the doctor had said she was doing well for now that he'd also said the baby would probably come early. They'd just hover over her even more, convinced that any tiny ache or pain she felt was the onset of labor and she didn't want to deal with that.
They pulled into the rehab center and Amanda quickly grabbed Noah from his car seat. Olivia managed with some effort to pull herself up from the car and then they walked inside. According to the nurse at the front desk, Elliot was in his room so they made their way down the long hall until they reached the door and Olivia peered around the corner, surprised when she saw him standing and even more shocked when he walked from the bed to a chair in the corner. His steps were slow and a little unsteady, but he was definitely walking…and all on his own. "El…" her voice creaked and he turned to look at her, shocked when he saw her standing there.
"Liv?" he questioned. "Honey…what are you doing here?" Elliot looked at her, taking in every inch of her body. Her maternity blouse was pulled tight over her stomach, her hand making delicate circles he assumed as a way to calm the baby or possibly ease her own discomfort. Her feet and legs were uncomfortably swollen and he noticed she was wearing flip flops, probably because none of her other shoes fit. Her face was puffy and her hands were bloated with water retention. He was worried about her…she didn't even remotely resemble herself anymore and she looked worse than she had when he'd seen her a couple of weeks ago. It scared him.
Olivia walked in and Amanda followed her, carrying Noah. "Dada…" the little boy squealed happily and when she put him down he ran to his father. By now Elliot had sat down in the chair and he picked Noah up sitting him in his lap.
Olivia walked over to join him, leaning over to kiss him and after the kiss Elliot put his hand gently on her stomach and sighed, "You're not supposed to be here," he reminded her. "You're supposed to be home in bed."
"I went to the doctor today, and he said I could come see you," she told him and he glanced at Amanda who nodded letting him know it was the truth.
"Well I'm glad," he smiled. "I missed you."
Olivia sat down in the chair across from him, "You were walking," she said eagerly. "By yourself. Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't want to get your hopes up," he admitted. "I'm still a little shaky at it, and I can't go for very long without having to sit down…"
"But you were walking," Olivia said seriously. "El…that's amazing."
"I'm gonna go out to the lobby and leave you two alone," Amanda said from the doorway.
"Oh…Elliot have you met Amanda," Olivia asked, looking toward the detective. "She's been helping out a lot."
"I think we met once," Elliot said, remembering the day he went to the police station and Amanda thought he had come to report a crime. He smiled briefly, relieved that he had remembered something as unimportant as that. He finally felt like his memory was back for good. "Thanks for helping her…I know she's not the easiest patient," he laughed.
Amanda laughed, "She's been great…much better than I would've expected." She smiled, "I'll come back and get Noah in about ten minutes. Remember, the doctor said a short visit."
Olivia nodded, watching as Amanda walked out the door. Then she turned back to Elliot, handing him the ultrasound picture, "Look…" she grinned. "She's sucking her thumb."
"Oh my God…" Elliot looked in awe at the picture. "She's so big…I've missed so much…I'm sorry…"
"You haven't missed anything," Olivia insisted. "A few appointments…that's all. You'll be home when we really need you and that's what's most important."
He nodded, "I wasn't going to tell you yet, but my doctor thinks I'll be able to come home soon…"
"What?" Olivia asked. "When?"
"Within the next week," Elliot sighed. "If I can pass the motor skills tests…I'm trying, Liv. I promise."
"I know you are," she brushed away the tears that were staining her cheeks. He was coming home and that was the best news she'd heard in months. "You're gonna come home…" She burst into tears, unable to stop herself and Elliot let Noah climb down from his lap, forcing himself to stand up and walked the few steps to her chair.
"Liv…it's okay," he reached out, hugging her close. "Don't cry…"
"I miss you," she admitted sadly. "This is so hard…"
"I know," he rubbed her back and brushed her hair out of her face. "I'm sorry I haven't been there to help. I promised you I would be there…and you've had to go through this all alone."
Olivia shook her head, "It's not your fault. I don't even know why I'm crying…"
"Because you're tired and overwhelmed and you feel miserable," Elliot reminded her. "And the hormones probably aren't helping…"
Olivia laughed a little with a sniffle, "I'm sorry…I'm such a mess."
"No you're not," Elliot smiled, rubbing her stomach gently with his hand and feeling the baby move beneath his touch, "Hey…she's kicking today."
"Yeah…I think the doctor agitated her," Olivia smiled.
Noah walked over to them, hugging his mother's legs and smiling, "Mama…go home?" he asked.
Elliot looked at the little boy and smiled, "You're trying to leave me?" he asked teasingly. Then he took the little boy's hand, placing it on the spot where the baby was kicking. "Do you feel that?" he asked. "That's your baby sister, Noah."
Noah giggled, "Baby…" he playfully smacked at Olivia's stomach, laughing when the baby would kick back at him, but it was only a matter of minutes before he grew bored with the game. "Go home, Mama?" he asked again.
"Yeah…we need to go home," Olivia nodded, letting out a deep breath and running her hand over her stomach.
"Are you alright?" Elliot asked nervously. "You don't look good, Liv. I'm worried…"
"I'm fine," she promised. "Just big and pregnant…" she gave a weak smile. "I'm gonna text Amanda that we're ready. I can't get Noah to the car by myself anymore." She pulled out her phone, sending a quick message.
"I wish I was home to help," Elliot said honestly.
"You will be…" Olivia's smile was tired and he knew she didn't have any energy left. He leaned forward, placing his lips firmly against hers, holding the kiss longer than he'd meant to but not wanting to pull away. When he did finally sit back and look at her, she sighed, "I miss kissing you…" she admitted.
"Me too," Elliot agreed. Amanda walked in, not sure if she had interrupted something, but the way they looked longingly at one another signaled that she had. Elliot squeezed Olivia's hand, "I'm gonna be home…really soon. Just hang in there, okay?"
She nodded sadly, achingly standing to her feet as Amanda took Noah's hand and he waved good-bye to his father while they walked out the door.