This story is completely AU. So everything you already know about these characters and this show is wrong. I'm basically borrowing these characters for my own version of their love story.

Is a disclaimer necessary? If I were Milmar you all would get every Caskett wish you ever wanted! :)

Chapter 10

Kate woke up a few hours later with a pounding headache. She felt sick to her stomach and her head was filled with regret. She made her way to the bathroom, running herself a scalding hot bath. She sank into the water and laid her head back to rest on the back of the tub. Closing her eyes, she began to have flashes of what had happened earlier in her apartment. The tears started slowly but after a minute or so she had broken into full panic-y sobs. How could she have backtracked so much. How would Castle react to this news, after she had already had to confess once to him about how they met. There is no way that he would want anything to do with her after this. When her sobs wouldn't die down and she could barely control her breathing you got out of the bath, wrapping her towel around her body and ran out to her phone. She sent one text, hoping that it would be enough. She knew exactly what she needed and hopefully they would understand.

Worst morning ever. I need you. Something horrible happened. I know you are working, but just please call when you can.

She went back to her bedroom and pulled on and oversized shirt and sweatpants. She made herself a sandwich and cuddled up on the couch under a blanket. She couldn't even stomach the sandwich, her thoughts still on what had happened this morning. How betrayed she felt by Josh for using her and then leaving like it was nothing. He instigated the whole thing, something she should have stopped but it was hard. In the moment all she could think about was how much she had missed him. This was becoming a pattern, of breaking up and making up, except this time the making up had only been sex to him. The more she thought about it the more the tears fell uncontrollably and she didn't know what to do to make it better.

She heard a knock on the door and slowly got up to get it. After drying her face and eyes and straightening up her shirt she pulled it open.

"Katie, what's wrong?"

Her mother was standing there, dressed in her work clothes with her briefcase in hands. She dropped it to the floor and in an instant was pulling her into a tight hug. After a long hug her mom grabbed her arms separating the two and began to look her over from head to toe.

"You don't seem physically hurt so what's going on baby?"

The tears came harder, and the sobs louder. Johanna took her daughters hand pulling her to the couch to sit next to her and then puller her daughter down to lay with her head on her lap. She started playing with Kate's hair and trying to calm her down.

"Katie, take a few deep breaths and tell me what's going on. Whatever it is, I'm sure we can fix it."

Kate's cries started to settle as she took a few deep breaths.

"Mom, I slept with Josh." She said, as if she was embarrassed but more disappointed in herself.

"Okay… Well, honey I know that you all have been sleeping together for years, so why exactly was this time so different?" Johanna was trying to push for answers but she didn't want Kate to feel attacked by her questions.

"He doesn't love me anymore, I could tell. He was so rough with me, he was disconnected." She replied.

"Rough with you? Kate did he force himself on you?"

"No…No," she stuttered. "I was a willing participant, but when we first started…. Ya know," she shrugged her shoulders and looked towards the ceiling.

"having sex?" Johanna said it, because clearly Kate was very uncomfortable.

"Yes, mom, having sex," Kate rolled her eyes. "He was just really rough with me, I don't know, I told him he was hurting me and he stopped."

"You want me to talk to Josh? I will, or I can have your dad say something."

"NO! This conversation never leaves this couch, mom. There is more to the story, that I have to tell you before you find out another way….. Mom, I've been seeing someone else kind of. I mean I've gone on a few dates with him, nothing too serious but I know that when he finds out about this that he won't want to be with me." She was sobbing through her words. The tears wouldn't stop, only growing stronger as she talked about Castle.

"Katie let me tell you a story…. When I was about your age I had a very serious boyfriend that I had been dating for years. We broke up and like you and Josh, we went back and forth for a while. I met your father not long after and we clicked pretty quickly, became good friends and were seeing each other pretty often. We weren't dating, and had no commitment to each other. Otherwise this would have never happened, I promise. Anyways, your dad and I had been going through a little bit of a transition phase. We didn't really know what we were and when I talked to him about it he seemed unwilling to commit to me. So that night I went out with my friends and I saw my ex boyfriend out and ended up going home with him, and sleeping with him. I felt immediate regret over the situation, and I beat myself up about it for a week. I was ignoring your dad because I had felt so much guilt. Eventually he showed up to my house, begging to talk to me. I couldn't lie to him, so I told him what had happened and how I was feeling about it. He was pretty mad about it at first. I gave him a few days to cool down before I called him, and when I did, he picked up on the first ring. From that day on we never went another day without each other. He forgave me and I know that it must have been the hardest thing for him to do, but he did…." Johanna continued to brush Kate's hair away from her face, over and over again.

"I don't want to tell him. I like him so much, and I know, I just know that when I tell him that he won't want to see me ever again. I don't think I can deal with that Mom. I can't lose him already."

"Katie, if this boy has any of the same feelings for you as you do for him then he deserves to know."

Her mother had always been her go-to, and Kate hid barely anything from her. No subject was off limits and Kate loved that about her mom. Johanna Beckett was a workaholic but it was only because of her need to make the world a better place. Kate always knew that her mom would come running when she needed her most, and today was one of those days. Kate thought about the story her mom had told her and decided that she would tell Rick what happened, and that even if he tried to push her away, she would still try to win him back.

"He isn't really a 'boy', mom." Kate said, a little under her breath.

Johnanna looked down at her daughter lying on her lap and gave her a look of intrigue.

"Kate, how old is he, and what is his name?" she barked at her daughter.

"Calm down, he is only 26, and his name is Rick, Rick Castle." She replied, a blush springing to her cheeks at the mention of his name.

Her mother looked away and back at her quickly. "Rick Castle? Katherine Houghton Beckett, you are not pursuing a 26 year old famous author."

"He is the sweetest man, and he has a daughter who is so beautiful. I know that you and dad are going to be against this, but I really like him, and I can't stop thinking about him. How this will affect him, because I know that he feels something for me. We have a connection. I don't know what happened this morning, mom. I haven't even been missing Josh very much. He was just there and we were fighting and then next thing I know, we are making out, and one thing led to another."

"yeah, yeah, I know, stop talking about it, you're still my daughter ya know." Johanna said as she scrunched her face up.

"So, I have to tell him, right?" Kate asked, and her mom responded with a simple head nod.

Goodbye to all the lost readers after last chapter. I'm not deleting my last chapter, that's absurd. This is the story I set out to write and I'm going to finish it and if you stick around, you'll love it.

I wanted to start writing fanfiction, because I truly felt like I was reading the same story over and over again. That's no fun to me. This is suppose to be fun, and just because its not like everyone elses doesn't mean its bad. At the very top of every chapter is a little note that says this is completely AU and that everything you already know about these characters is wrong. I am borrowing these characters for my own story. So my Kate, is not Marlowes Kate, and neither is my Castle. I hope you all stick around and give this a chance. I am really just trying to entertain here, and if it's not your cup of tea then I totally respect that. If it is, then buckle up.