"Maybe Kendall convinced Carlos not to do it…I mean, we can only hope, right?" He smiled squeezing my hand in his and sat back in his seat glancing up at the dark stormy sky. "We didn't have to come out into the cold. They could have come to the house."
"If they did, and Carlos had the balls to ask me, if would have ended in a fight. I didn't want the babies to see that." I couldn't help but smile as big as I was hearing him say it. He was smitten by these kittens. He was waking up every hour to check on them. He was already doing the baby talk thing to them. All because of four tiny little cats, the man of my dreams was a ball of love. I adored it. "Besides…I love this coffee and fatty down there needs to get out more." I glanced down to Romeo who was sitting very patiently, tongue hanging out, looking around at all the different sights and sounds. "Which is something his dad should really start doing with him. Taking him out and walking him. So he's not 40 pounds." I frowned turning back to Logan and let his hand go. I leaned in quick when he started to pout and kissed the side of his mouth.
"He's not fat. He's big boned. And he wouldn't have so many extra pounds if his daddy would stop feeding him people food from the table." I sat back in my chair grabbing my cup of coffee and putting Logan's hand back in mine. He opened his mouth wide and set his own coffee cup down situating the beanie on his head. It was my beanie. It was just a plain black one, that was actually really warm, but on Logan it was the cutest damn thing ever. He was growing out his hair, ever since we left L.A. actually he hasn't even talked about cutting it. Which I loved. So some hair was sticking out under the beanie making him that much cuter. And it didn't help that he was growing his facial hair out. There wasn't a lot right now, but enough to make me weak.
"Why are you the only one who gets to spoil that dog?" I smirked taking a sip of my hot Mocha Frappuccino and looked out at the street in front of us. "And of course…20 minutes late…incoming babe." I turned my head to Logan who nodded behind me, making me let go of his hand and stand.
I smiled, obviously because no matter the situation, these two were like brothers to me. But it faded fast seeing how unhappy they both looked. I swallowed hard locking eyes with Kendall who was looking over my shoulder, and when they got to us, he burst out laughing. "Look at the mountain man here." I smirked turning to Logan who frowned and walked around me to get to Kendall who held out his hands and pulled him in for a big hug. "I didn't know you could grow hair on your face dude. You're always so clean cut." They hug tight for a long minute, leaving both Carlos and I in an awkward silence. I looked at him, but he barely glanced to me, setting a brown leather messenger bag on the table.
"See what New York has done to me?" They pulled apart, both smiling, happily. Logan turned to Carlos and sighed shaking his head. "Hey buddy." Carlos chuckled quietly and they moved into each other hugging close and tight. I turned to Kendall quick who put a hand on my shoulder and cleared his throat.
"Why don't James and I go get some drinks? What do you want babe?" I looked to the two and saw Carlos with his eyes closed, and a small smile on his face. "Cool…I'll go get that." Kendall rolled his eyes and walked past them heading for the door. I lifted Logan's cup feeling it almost completely empty and snuck a a soft kiss to the back of his head while him and Carlos pulled away.
"You want anything else besides a refill?" Logan sat down next to Carlos and smiled glancing around.
"Chocolate chip muffin…maybe some water for tubby down there?" I frowned but nodded, patting Carlos shoulder, giving it a soft squeezed. He smiled up at me, nicely but turned to Logan fast. I glanced to Logan as he watched Carlos open his bag and start to pull out a binder. He looked uneasy. I hoped for Carlos's sake he didn't say or do anything stupid to Logan. Not that I was worried Logan couldn't take care of himself. I know he can. But he doesn't want it to reach that point.
I walked into the small coffee shop and rubbed my hands together seeing Kendall already in the long line. I brushed past a few people getting to him and sighed out, standing next to him. He looked ot me, but quickly looked back to the menu. "What's good here? Drink wise?"
"Caramel Mocha Frap. It's to die for." He nodded slowly shoving his hands into his pockets of his jeans. "You okay buddy? You seem tense."
"Do you remember our phone conversation yesterday?" I nodded slowly taking a few small steps up, following the slow progression of the line and glance to him. "Carlos is convinced Logan will understand and give him his blessing…" He stopped turned to me and scrunched his eyebrows together. "Did you tell Logan?"
"Of course I told Logan. And it wasn't like he had to beat it out of me." He rolled his eyes facing back the front and I shrugged. "I came home from work yesterday and was greeted with 4 tiny kittens Logan found on a street corner, in a damp box. He barely had to do anything to convince me we were keeping them. I just agreed. Do you know why?"
"Because it's almost Christmas and leaving four defenseless kittens out in the cold is inhumane. You're better than that."
"Besides that." He chuckled shrugging and I laughed. "Dude…three months ago I thought I lost Logan. Three months ago, Logan thought he was never going to be able to move on from the trauma and torture. And last night…Logan was back to himself. I finally, after all this time have my Logan back. The one who laughs at my dumbass jokes just to make me feel good. The one who wakes up in the middle of the night, hearing a thunderstorm and runs out to play in the rain. And the same one, who would drop everything on a dime, just to help someone else in need." I turned my body to him making him look at me, and expressionless look on his face. "Now…because I have him back…no way in hell am I going to lose him again. So if by some miracle Carlos convinces him…it will only be because Carlos broke him down, made him feel guilty and took advantage of his emotions. That is something I will not accept and I will not be afraid to tell Carlos that. And for the record our wedding planning is going swimmingly. In fact we have date, not that you or him care." I turned back to the front, stepping forward, shoving my hands into my jean pockets and stepped up to the counter.
I order and paid for everything, including the drinks Kendall got for himself and Carlos and waited for them to ready, in silence. When my name was called I grabbed mien and Logan's stuff and walked out, not caring if Kendall was right behind me. I walked out to our table but slowed down seeing Logan with his right leg up, and his foot resting on his left knee. He was holding a sort of thick packet of paper and reading over it. I walked to the table slowly seeing Carlos staring intently at Logan, setting back, relaxed. I gently set Logan's coffee and muffin in front of him and took my own seat taking a sip of my ice cold drink. Kendall took the other seat between Carlos and I and handed him his drink. Carlos turned to him, as if snapped out of a trance and smiled small. "Thanks." Kendall only nodded sitting back and took a sip of his own.
"This is beautiful Carlos." I snapped my head up quick and turned to Logan seeing him reaching forward for his coffee shaking his head. "Why have you never written like this before?"
"Well I have…I've just never shared with anyone." I looked away from all three and sighed out, irritated. "There's a lot there, so I don't expect you to finish anytime soon but…I just want to know what you think." Logan sighed out sitting back and raised his eyebrows taking a sip of his black coffee. When he set it back on the table I prepared myself for a screaming match between the two.
"It's beautiful Carlos. There is no doubt about that…but as far as what else is in this…I cannot stand behind." I saw Carlos almost deflate in the corner of my eye but kept my sight on Logan. He looked strong. He looked confidant in the fact that he was doing the right thing. "Why…why would this be the first thing you'd want published? This is a story Carlos. It's a nightmare, and frankly it's not even yours. What is the purpose of this?" I casually put my arm down and grabbed his thigh squeezing softly. He turned to em and smiled small. "It's taken me a long time to be able to wake up and not think about him. Knowing you've been doing nothing but thinking about him and what happened…it makes me sad." I frowned squeezing his leg again but he shook his head turning back to Carlos. "For you. The only way you, me, Kendall and James will ever get over this is if we do exactly that. Get over it. Move on. I can't move on if I'm going to see this story all over the news again."
"I just think if we tell people the true side of the story…" Carlos sat up a little but so did Logan gently throwing the paper on the table.
"Carlos I don't care what side of the story is out there. You're not just asking for my blessing to use my name and likeness. You expect me to pour out my heart and soul into this and tell my side of the story. No. My answer is no, and will always be no." I smirked, but raised my cup covering my lips. It didn't matter however, because I was caught. Carlos and I locked eyes and he locked his jaw in place turning back to Logan.
"Maybe we could talk about this…in private." I chuckled swallowing my coffee and quickly grabbed Logan hand, squeezing it. I just wanted to make sure he knew I wasn't going anywhere. And when he squeezed back I knew neither was he. "Maybe you and I could go to dinner tonight."
"No Carlos. Because you'll harass me about this and I don't feel like fighting with you. I'm finally at peace in a beautiful city with a beautiful life ahead of me. And I'm happy Los. Genuinely happy."
"Why? Because you want to be happy or he's making you pretend to be happy?" I turned to Carlos slowly and felt my pulse quicken and my blood start to boil.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" My hand was squeezed again and Logan sat up clearing his throat.
"I suppose you wouldn't know how happy I am because you haven't been anywhere near me. You haven't even picked up the phone to call." Carlos chuckled and gently picked up his coffee cup shaking his head. "Do not come here, try to guilt me into being a part of this and then attack the one man who has done everything in his power to make me whole again. Who the hell do you think you are?" I didn't need to look at Logan to know eh was pissed. You could hear it in his voice. And both Carlos and Kendall could tell, Kendall was the first to reply.
"Okay…let's just all calm down and try to talk this out."
"Talk what out Kendall? How Carlos could be so inconsiderate?"
"Fuck you James." I sat up straight in my chair but Logan stood up and shook his head.
"Enough. If this is the only reason you two came to see, us I think we'll be leaving." Kendall swallowed hard and looked to Carlos who chuckled standing up.
"I can see you won't even stand by my side so I guess I'll be going too." Carlos shoved the papers back in his bag and threw it over his shoulder. He turned grabbing shi cup and stormed off, making Romeo bark up at him.
"What the shit is he thinking Kendall?" Both Kendall and I stood up slowly as Logan quickly scooped Romeo up and untie his leach from my chair leg.
"I don't know…he's been going nuts over this for a while…but uhm…" Logan stood right next to me and rubbed the back of his neck shaking his head. "I told him this was a bad idea but he insist we tell you, because you guys are family and he wants you to be there." I shoved my phone into my back pocket of my jeans and grabbed Logan's coffee and muffin, that he hadn't even touched yet. "We're getting married. Up in Vermont this weekend. It's going to be small and we really want you two to be there." My mouth parted slightly and he nodded. "Yeah. I know were dicks because you guys are planning your own wedding but…just call me later alright. I'm going to leave before James fucking kills me. I love you guys." He nodded once, before grabbing his coffee and walking around the table off to where Carlos went.
We walked in silence back to our apartment, hand in hand, him munching on his muffin, out of nerves and sadness probably. We got home and the first thing he did was call for the kittens. All four kittens, we found out, were male and I left the name calling up to Logan and he had to come up with the four cutest name sever for cats. Craig, David, Theo and Benji. He walked out into the living room, where they were, all playing with the toys and cat condo he got yesterday and sat next to it and the fireplace sighing out. They jumped all over him, making him smile, which made me smile. I walked out to them, leaving my shoes by the dining room table and threw my jacket to the first chair I saw. Before I sat down next to him, I made a quick fire. When I did sit next to him, before any of the kittens could come to me, Romeo jumped up on my lap and sighed out lying down hard. I chuckled rubbing his back and looked to Logan who was yawning and taking off the beanie, gently setting it next to the fireplace. "For the first time in forever, I don't want to see Kendall or Carlos. For a while." I nodded softly and he shook his head, hugging around his legs while also taking off his shoes. "They got pretty brave. First Carlos asking em to not only agree to his words, but to put it in my own words. And then Kendall telling us their getting married? Our friends our dicks."
"Yeah. They are. Thank God we've got each other." He smiled big nodding and looked down to the pug in my lap." Does that mean you don't want to go to the wedding?"
"I don't know yet. Part of me really wants to see them jump off a fucking cliff." I whistled low and he frowned at me making me laugh. "But another part…a bigger part wants to go because I know how beautiful it will be. And they are family, like Kendall said."
"But doesn't sting just a little knowing they decided to get married, before us, even after they knew we've been planning our own wedding? Doesn't that piss you off?"
"Yeah that's why I made the cliff comment." I laughed out loud and gently took Romeo off my lap and pushed into Logan, shoving him on his back on the floor. He held around the back of my neck and sighed out softly glancing down my body. "In a really weird way…them coming here has given me an amazing idea." I quirked up an eyebrow and hovered over his body, licking my lips slowly. He watched them and then smirked and grabbed my sides rubbing them. "Let's just go get married. Right now." I froze instantly and he giggled sitting up on his elbows and kissed my chin. "Let's go do to the court and get the papers. We don't need to have a big wedding. Because like you said…thank God we've got each other right? We've only got each other…obviously our friends fucking suck." I frowned and he shrugged. "It's true…and I love you, you love me. It just makes sense. And for a side note…the sooner we have our wedding the sooner we can go on our honeymoon." He licked my lips quickly forcing my eyes closed and my knees weak. I fell over top of him and put my face on his chest. "Is that a yes? Can we go get married? And then go to the airport and just chose a flight to go anywhere in the world?"