Author's note: I'm sorry that I hadn't been able to update yesterday. I simply didn't make it home in time.
Don't worry. It won't happen again soon.

"You can't have what you want."

"I only want what I can't have" chuckled Koschei.

"You only need what you don't want" I hissed back and shook my head as if I'd thereby be able to get rid of Koschei's twisted thoughts.

"And what do I need, Theta?" asked Koschei playfully. He was still toying with me. He wouldn't stop.

"Sanity" I replied without giving it much thought "and any God's mercy. You need mercy."

Koschei chuckled and smiled.

"Well that wasn't exactly what you wanted to say, was it Theta?"

I gritted my teeth.

It was 'You need mercy killing', chuckled Koschei's voice inside my mind.

"Koschei, I told you to stay out of my head! Stay out of me!"

Koschei's grin became broader and broader.

In my head it had sounded like screaming; but I must be talking in a low voice, with words barely audible. Otherwise one of the headmaster's secretaries must have stormed out of the office by now, ordering us to keep away from here.

Koschei didn't reply.

And I felt him.
I felt him invading my body; there we stood, probably minutes or even hours passing; I wouldn't know. I wouldn't feel if or how time passed. Something was approaching. Something was coming. Nearer and nearer. Something was coming for me.

Koschei's mad grin wouldn't vanish; I could feel his erect limb on my thighs and remained in the same helpless position, completely abashed and in desperation. I wouldn't respond to Koschei's futile attempts of calling me to heel; I just stood there and watched motionless how my mind was turned into a roaring stream that gushed through my head, tearing at memories and sensations I had once known and drowning them after a short fight.

And it was still coming; it was drawing nearer and nearer, coming closer with every breath, with every beat of my hearts.
I felt something.

I thrust my head forward again, bashing it against Koschei's.

It wouldn't stop; he just wouldn't stop!

"Isn't this fun, Theta?" asked Koschei. I couldn't tell if he was talking to me by mouth or in my head.

I shook my head irritated before aiming at Koschei's head again.

"You're losing your grip on reality" chuckled Koschei "That's quite good for a start."

I glared at Koschei furiously. He was still there and I couldn't stop him. I couldn't stop him from taking both my mind and my body, I couldn't resist him and I couldn't do anything! I simply couldn't do a thing against it!

"Oh, but you can, Theta" commented Koschei on my thoughts "You can. If you want to."

Koschei was approaching, our bodies were pressed against each other and still he was drawing nearer; he wanted us to meld, he wanted us to become on, one mind spread over two bodies.

I gritted my teeth again and looked him in the eyes, hitting my head on the door behind me when I dared to flinch.

My eyes.

I had seen my eyes in the reflection of Koschei's eyes.

My eyes were burning. I blinked and couldn't believe what I dared to stare back at me from Koschei's golden eyes.

A pair of amber eyes. My eyes were burning with the fire of Koschei's soul. The void. It had managed to enter through my eyes.

Koschei hadn't only looked into the void, the endless fabric of reality and had gone mad. He had become part of it. And now he wanted me to join him.

I shook my head again and stared with wide open eyes at my own reflection. No, no, he didn't want me to join; he tried to force me into becoming part of it; he wanted me to be like him. With him.

Like he'd always said when we had been children. He wanted to be with me. Forever. I shouldn't change.

"Mustn't Theta" Koschei smirked "you always get that wrong. You mustn't change."

Koschei rubbed his crotch against my thighs, his limb poking me permanently.

"Well, I guess it's still Body or Mind in a way" smiled Koschei; I watched him with unbelieving amber coloured eyes, watching my eyes as well as his turning into glistening, fierce gold.

"You can't concentrate on both of them simultaneously" explained Koschei and increased the speed while thrusting his groin against my body "That's the trouble with choosing. That's the trouble with your mind, Theta: It can't decide what it should do. It can't take care of your body and itself at the same time."

"Koschei stop talking nonsense!" I snapped; I doubt that we were still in the academy, I doubt that we were still were we had started. We had started in front of the headmaster's office; but we must have ended up somewhere else.

Coming closer. Rushing through my mind.

I stood there, Koschei's head pressed against mine. Mind on mind, melting into one another.

No.

Koschei had no mind. He had no body. He wasn't at all.

He was the void. The void lived throughout him, he carried the void inside of him; and in his eyes the reflection of time itself was captured.

And now it was coming for me.

The void. Erasing my memories. Annihilating everything that made me who I was. Deliberately obliterating.

I closed my eyes and winced, feeling an incontrollable urge, developing an unbridled lust, an irrepressible zestfulness; that was Koschei's mind, or at least what resembled it.

Always yearning. Always longing. Never to be satisfied, never to be finished.

"Can't you hear it calling for you, Theta?" asked Koschei. His voice was somewhat soothing. I looked up to find him embracing me. He wasn't taking me by force; I felt him coming closer and closer, I felt his body pressed against mine without any kind of impressiveness.

I would lie if I'd deny that I felt safe in his arms all of a sudden, that I felt as if I was protected and calmed.

And Koschei wouldn't stop smiling.

And the void was calling for me, it called out for me, reached for me, rushed through my mind and spurted itself all over me; just like Koschei.

I pressed my fingertips against my temples.

"Theta, why are you still resisting?" asked Koschei and popped his head to one side.

"Don't you like? Don't you want to play with me?"

Don't you want to play with me?

He's always asked me that. When we were children he'd come to my parent's house and beg for me, he was always begging for seeing me. And my father would send him away. And he would climb onto the roof, with help from our apple tree, and would move towards my window.

He'd always entered by window. And he had most certainly scared me to death every single time.

And I had tried to escape him. I had always believed that my father wouldn't send him without cause, without a reason; that would have been unlike him. That would have been more like Koschei.

And when I'd tried to flee from my room he'd always ask me "Don't you want to play with me?"

And I had stopped.

And I had stayed.

I had always stayed and I had never contradicted him.

I had always liked Koschei.

And even if he'd scared me sometimes... even when he'd frightened me by the way he'd behaved, the way he'd played with me, the way he'd hurt me while playing with me...

I knew that I wouldn't get rid of him.
But not because he'd never leave my side. In fact: I would never let him leave my side. I had wanted him to stay by my side, stay with me. I had needed him. I had belonged to him.
Or he had already managed to break through the thick walls of stubbornness and torn them down before exchanging my well protected thoughts against some that were more to his taste.
Koschei was there, inside of me. And so was the void.

"You're trying to stop me" chuckled Koschei "but unfortunately it's not going to work."

"Why do I have to stop you from entwining your twisted thoughts with mine? Why don't you stop?" I snapped. "Why don't you stop?"

"No reason" was his only reply. And beside I could have guessed that he was going to say that I knew that Koschei never knew when he had to stop.

Koschei had had no reasons. He was. That was all. He simply was.

When he was a child he'd been playful and bright-eyed.
Now he was driven by urges and sexual desires.

"Stop it, Koschei" I hissed between gritted teeth "Stop invading my body. Why don't you just stop?"

"Right now, you're stopping" mumbled Koschei "You're stopping to make sense, Theta."
I snarled in his ear while my head rested on his shoulder.
Koschei went on "We must be close."

"Close to what?" I asked as I felt his hands reaching for mine. He wrapped his knuckles around mine and squeezed them hard.

"Close to the edge. We've reached a threshold."

Thick and sludgy waves carried my perishing memories; the void was swallowing my mind and spewing some of the last memories I had encountered.

Body or Mind, Theta? Why don't you chose between your Body or your Mind?

"You can't help it, Theta!" Koschei yelled. "You can't win! You can't!"

Body or Mind.

Mind or Body.

I had made my decision. And I hadn't managed to spare my mind.

Koschei wanted both. And he wouldn't let me chose.

I grabbed Koschei wrists and squeezed them until my knuckles turned white.

"Body, Koschei" I screamed at him, "stay out of my body!"

"You can't win, Theta!" Koschei repeated and started laughing triumphantly "You can't win!"

"Stay out of my body! Stay out of it! Koschei stay out of it! I don't want you to ever touch me again, do you hear me, Koschei? Never ever again! Stay out of me! Stay out of my body! I don't want you inside of me! For any God's sake, stay out!"