hey, so sorry my updates are inconsistent but just trying to find the time to write the chapters then upload is proving to be quite difficult at the moment and will probably continue all the way up to christmas as i will be at work a lot... So quite a few people here and on instagram have asked wether I will updating my other fanfics. The answer is yes I will be but at the moment I'm really enjoying writing this fanfic and have lots of ideas but defiantly after Christmas when I have a bit more time I will update them all.
ANYWAY enjoy this chapter and make sure you let me know what you think :)
Chapter 7 - You failed
I roll over and look at my clock beside my bed, it was already 7am I hadn't slept at all. I get up and look outside my window, the sun was nowhere to be seen and the rain was pouring down when something catches my eye. I walk out of room and make my way to the garden where Kyle was sat, I knew I had to speak to him about last night but I just didn't know what to say, how could I ever expect him to forgive me after that. After a few minutes I decide to go and talk to him, as I get closer I feel my heart beating faster and I reach Kyle I sit down awkwardly next to him.
"Your up early" Kyle says breaking the tension
"I couldn't sleep,what about you?" I reply
"Just been thinking about things"
"I'm so sorry about what I said last night, I was completely out of order. I didn't mean anything I said I was just angry about everything and I just took it out on you and that's not right and I understand if you can't forgive me because I don't forgive myself either" I rant
"Paige don't worry about it"
"But I said some horrible stuff"
"I know you didn't mean any of it, I know it was just the grief talking" Kyle reassured
"I don't know what I would do without you Kyle" I admit
"Come here" Kyle says pulling me closer to him engulfing me in a hug.
- few hours later-
I pick up Casey's jacket from his bedroom floor and pull it close, it still smelt like him. in a way it kind of made it feel like he was still here. I sit down on the floor still holding tightly onto the jacket whilst staring at the picture of Casey and I on his beside table. I must of been caught up in my own world as I didn't even notice Heath enter the room.
"how you doing kiddo" Heath asks
"Heath" I say quickly getting up off the floor and running over to him, he holds me tightly in his muscular arms.
"I missed you" I admitted
"I'm sorry I haven't been down before today, i just couldn't face coming back here without Case being here" Heath sighed
"Heath it's fine you don't have to explain yourself to me" I addressed
"But I'm here now and if you need to talk to me about anything" Heath hinted
"Has Brax said something to you" I ask
"No..." Heath lied
"tell me the truth" I insist
"Okay well maybe" Heath announced
"He had no right I'm fine he's just overreacting" I say raising my voice
"He has a point though, and I know us Braxton's don't like talking about our feelings but you saw something no one should ever have to see, especially at your age" Heath added
"I don't want to talk about this anymore,especially not today" I groaned
I walk into the kitchen with Heath to see everyone sat waiting around in silence. Mum turns around and walks over to me before giving me a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek, I guess that's her way of apologising I thought to myself.
"Where's Brax" I ask concerned
"We don't know" Kyle admitted
"What do you mean, you don't know?" I question
"When I woke up this morning he was already gone, there was no note, nothing" Ricky added
"You don't think he's gone to find Jake do you?" I croak
"I really hope not" Heath said nervously
After about 10 minutes of standing around, Brax finally comes home surfboard in hand.
"Where have you been?" Kyle asks
"Where does it look like I've been?" Brax says sarcastically "sorry look I just needed to clear my head" Brax apologises
"The hurst will be here in a minute, I've laid your suit on the bed ready for you" Ricky adds
But Brax wasn't listening to Ricky as he was stood staring at mum who had a picture book of all of us as kids in her trembling hands.
"You alrite mum?"
"You had one job to do Darryl, one job to project Casey" Mum sighs
"Cheryl don't" Ricky begs
"And you failed" Mum continued
"Yep" Brax nods and quickly walks away into his flat.
Ricky's follows quickly behind.
everyone stands in silence, that was the worst thing mum could of said to Brax. He was the one who raised us, looked after us, taught us, put food on the table he had always been a father figure in our lives and for mum to say that broke my heart.
"Brax didn't deserve that" I say aloud so mum could hear
"Casey didn't deserve to get shot either" Mum argued
"your right he didn't but Brax has been the one to raise us and if it wasn't for him one of us would of been dead or in prison a long time ago, especially you mum how many times did Brax give you money to pay off your debts so that people wouldn't come after you" I said angrily "oh wait I forgot you probably don't remember any of that because you were either drunk or on drugs" I add storming out the front door before I said anything else I might regret.
The rain had finally stopped and the sun was finally making an appearance. I stand outside not wanting to go back inside as I was still fuming, as I wait outside for everyone to join me the hurst pulls up with the coffin. I slowly walk up to the hurst and place my hands on the glass,I find it difficult to believe that Casey is inside that small dark coffin on his own he was always so claustrophobic and I know that he's dead and doesn't know any different but something inside of me made me feel terrible. I start to hear everyone coming out of the house so turn around to stand next to them.
"you okay squirt?" Heath asks
"Yeah I'm fine" I whisper
"I think we better start making a move" Kyle suggests
We all stand for a while before going our separate ways into different cars. Brax and Ricky where in the first car, Heath and I in the second, Kyle and Phoebe and Mum where in the third and Andy, Josh and Evie where in the last. We all pull off behind the hurst and slowly follow it to gravesite where we would be burying Casey.