Chapter 11

It's been an hour; an hour of me pretending to work in my office while I hear Emma all over the house. I swear she is just as bad as Henry when he is trying to find something to do whilst I work on the weekends.

I heard the television on for a bit, and then I heard cabinets open and close in the kitchen. I heard her run up and down the stairs a few times as well. She has been staying in the guest room across the hall from Henry, but she doesn't have much there. She had driven to Boston last week to tie up some loose ends, and pack up her place, but when she only returned with a few boxes I really did not question her.

She started training with Grahams a few weeks ago, happy to take the job of Deputy. And things are starting to fall into place for her.

I figure that since I have yet to do any real work I might as well see what she is up to since I have not heard her in the last few minutes.

As I round the corner to the living room I can hear her whispering on the phone. I know I shouldn't but I cannot help it as curiosity wins out and I try to listen to what she is saying.

"No you wouldn't get it… it feels like nothing I have felt before. I couldn't even explain it. No you and I have talked about this. Yes I know. I know and with Henry things are even more complicated…" his name only piques my interest even more. I inch closer behind the couch, standing next the end table near the doorway.

"You know that hot feeling before you.. well you know. That heat, oh yeah, yep you know what I am saying. Now just imagine that without any of that other stuff. Oh my god I can't believe I am telling you this over the phone Ruby." I had felt my heart quicken at Emma's voice, and the way she was whispering only made it more breathy. But as soon as I heard Ruby's name I jumped back and effectively knocked over a vase on the table, and it shattered on the floor.

Emma jumped up quickly turned around and I was caught like a deer in headlights.

I was about to turn and retreat when Emma stopped me.

"Hey Rubes, sorry I gotta go.. yah I know I'm sorry to cut you off but I gotta go. Ok bye." She clicked off her phone and is still staring at me.

"I didn't mean to disturb you; I just wanted to know if you were hungry. But I can see you were busy, let me just get this cleaned up and I'll be in the kitchen." I turn again and try to retreat when Emma grabs my arm.

"Not so fast Regina, you are barefoot and there is broken glass like.. everywhere. Let me grab my boots real quick. Don't move!" Emma says to me as she hops in places like a rabbit until she is out of the danger zone and runs to grab her shoes.

"Emma I hardly think socks will keep you from getting cut as well. I am not a child, I have cleaned many of Henry's messes before." I say back, half yelling the last part since she is now in another room.

Yet I still stand there, like I am frozen in time and wait for her return.

"Oh come on Regina, let me take care of it. Haven't you cleaned up your share of messes already?" She asks me innocently when she returns with her hideous boots.

That was very thoughtful of her. If only she knew how many messes I have had to clean in my time. It's quite ironic that the savior is constantly trying to run to my rescue without even knowing she is destined to break my curse and bring me down.

"Am what am I to do? Just stand here like some damsel in distress? Oh how ever will I be able to get to the couch with all this scary dangerous glass?" I mimic how I think a helpless pathetic woman would sound, bringing both my hands to my mouth in the end to ad affect. "If only there was some strong man to come and rescue me." I say at the end.

She is just standing about 5 feet form me and looking so amused, and I then I see her come at me and before I know it, she has completely lifted me in the air and halfway over her shoulder. Then she carries me to the couch apposite to the one she was on and gently tilts me over until I am sitting.

"Me Tarzan you Jane." She says and then laughs at herself all the way to the supply closet where the brook and dustpan are.

"Well how very barbaric of you, I was pretending to need a prince, not some caveman." I say and I get a little more comfortable on the couch. Normally I would never let someone handle me like that but I know she was just having fun, and so I could not be angry if I wanted to.

"Oh come on Regina, you know that I was just kidding, plus who says you need a man. Period, You are definitely not some damsel in distress, but I still like to lay a helping hand when I can." She then comes back with her appropriate supplies and a very smug grin on her face.

"Oh I'm sure you do but you should probably only save said hands for Ms. Lucas." I say it and it starts out playful but as I say Ms. Lucas I cannot help but feel a sour taste in my mouth.

"What do you mean? What about Ruby? Oh my gosh did you hear our conversation on the phone earlier…?" She's asking me as she cleans up, but her voice does go a few octaves higher at the end.

"Well I may have entered the room at the tail end… and I must say I never thought you the type for, what is it called 'phone sexing'?" I say as lightly as I can, since we are friends isn't this what girls speak about?

She is quiet. And maybe I just ruined that fun friendly banter by saying something wrong. I swear, how is it so easy for other people to make friends? Am I that socially awkward that I cannot even joke with someone in my own home?

In the future Emma and I are friends, and we have been for some time even if neither of us would like to admit it. So why is it different here? I know we have been through more there, but I cannot shake the feeling that this friendship is so different. So much more emotionally charged. I decide to just ask her, because I am feeling more comfortable to ask, and maybe I just need to try harder.

"Have I said something wrong? I was just poking some fun, I did not mean to pry. Whatever is going on between the two of you is your business, although she wouldn't be my first choice, I thought we were developing a tentative friendship…" I know I should stop talking but I just do not know how to express to her that I have never done this before. I am embarrassed by the fact that I have never had a real true friend. The last friendship I had ended with a fairy losing her wings. I cannot tell her that.

"No its not you, you didn't do anything Regina. Let me just throw this out and you mentioned that you were hungry? Maybe we could meet in the kitchen and have a snack, and finally talk about a few things." She says as she is finishing getting most of the glass into the trash bag she had grabbed. I just nod and head to the kitchen.

I decided on sandwiches which was fast and easy. As I quickly assembled them I started to worry about us finally talking. I guess she had maybe noticed that I had been avoiding her over the last several weeks. Everytime her and I had been alone I had retreated to my room, or found an excuse to include Henry.

I had also encouraged Graham to give her more hours at the station since he had said she was doing very well.

…

Fifteen minutes later Emma and I were sitting across from each other in the kitchen, both staring down our cups of coffee.

"So… I guess I'll start. I have kind of noticed that you have been avoiding me. I also noticed you spending a lot of time with Henry which is totally cool, I mean he's your kid and all but I just feel like….." She looks so serious, her eyebrows scrunched together, her hands twisting, and just so different from earlier.

"Emma please, whatever you have to say, just say it. I know this may be awkward for the both of us, but I would like us to be able to talk to one another, if that's what you want. Especially since we are going to be in eachothers lives for who knows how long." I say it, but not in a mean tone, more desperate to have her crack a smile. My attempt at humor was lost on her as she was still focused on what she was trying to say.

I slowly reach across the table and untangle her hands. "Hey it is alright Emma, just say it, whatever it is." I pull my hand back and continue to sip my coffee.

"Okay, well, it's just that you were really kind to let me stay here but it seems like you don't really want me here. When Henry is not around you don't even talk to me, and when he is I feel like I am intruding on your special time with him. If you would like me to leave please just tell me, I mean I already emptied out my place, but I could call Mary Margaret and see if she still needs a roommate…"

"Emma stop right there. Just listen okay? I think things have gotten way out of control very shortly, and now I can see where you might think I want you to leave but please know that I truly do not." I cut her off before she could have finished her sentence. She thinks we do not want her here. All this time I've been worried about my own insecurities and did not realize the vibe I was projecting towards her.

"First of all, no one is asking you to leave. Like I said, Henry and I are glad that you are here. Yes I know that you and I got off to a very rough start. But I came to the realization last week that maybe this is where you are supposed to be. Here with us, and I know it doesn't make sense but maybe it will later." I know it's vague, but I cannot very well tell her that I need her to break the curse.

"I will admit that I have been avoiding you, but it is for a different reason. A reason that I am not used to being so open with others about which is probably why I have the issue in the first place… but if I am going to be honest with you then I hope you will listen and not judge what I have to say." I tell her, now really just talking more to myself in a way.

That's when she finally looks more determined and less nervous. "Regina, I know it's only been a short time that I've known you and Henry but you can tell me and trust that I will not judge you. Growing up the way I did, you kinda learn how to gage people. I know you are not only being truthful right now but doing something that doesn't come natural to you. I know how to read people and I will not judge you." She assures me.

"I don't know how to make friends…I have never had a real friend." I just kind of blurt it out. And as soon as I do I regret it.

That's when I decide to take a bite of my sandwich, in hopes to do something other than just sit there.

"Regina, look at me." She says very gently and when I do look up she is smiling at me. Not laughing but just smiling at me.

"Is that what this is about? You have been a better friend to me than anyone has been in a long time. Granted the time we have spent just you and I has been very short. But I feel this gravitation towards you. I tried to fight it at first, especially since you kept on getting me arrested, but even then, there was something there." she tells me earnestly and I can see such sincerity in her yes.

"I… are you sure? You feel the same?" I ask her.

"Well I don't know if it's exactly the same." She says looking down for a minute and tucking her hair behind her ears.

"What do you mean?" I ask, honestly not understanding what she means.

"Well it's a little complicated. But I just don't understand. I mean everyone in town knows you, and you are so put together. Do you not have time for friends? Once you open up a bit you are not as scary as you project. You are actually kind of like a Chihuahua. All bark and no bite." She says and smiles kind of like she's thinking it to herself but actually saying these things out loud.

"A Chihuahua? Really Ms. Swan. If you only knew of all the things I have done you wouldn't say that. I have ruled many people…." I stop as soon as I realize what I just said.

Now she's really trying hard to contain her laughter.

"Oh wow Regina calm down, I didn't mean to offend you, and I happen to really like Chihuahuas. And what's in your coffee? You make yourself sound like some crazy dictator instead of a Mayor of a small town. I'm just wondering how you don't have any friends, what with all of the social events you organize for the town and with Henry, aren't there any mothers at the school you are close with?"

I cannot take it. She is right about the social events and things, but I just cannot make small talk with the people in this town. I cannot tell her that I cursed them all and after the curse broke I was a social pariah. Always have been always will be. I was foolish to think she would understand.

I quickly stand and make my way to the door.

I hear the chair screech against the floor and Emma gets up and races behind me.

"Whoa whoa there, calm down. Please don't leave. I'm sorry I don't just don't understand how someone wouldn't want to know you." She says and turns me around both of her hands on my shoulders.

She's looking at me very closely.

"Well I guess it isn't as though I really try to make friends either. But you don't know what I've been through Emma. Or what I've done. I just thought you and I could have a chance this time. A chance at a better start, for Henry's sake, for all of our sakes." And I know I am saying too much and she doesn't know what I am talking about but there's just been so much pressure on me all these weeks.

"Hey it's going to be ok. Alright we will figure this out. But just know what I'm here for you. However you want me. I am here." She says this as she gets closer to my face; her hand slowly coming up to wipe the tear from my cheek.

"I shouldn't unload this on you, you wouldn't understand, and I don't know what I am feeling anymore. I just…" I say and close my eyes.

I lean into her hand a bit because even though I try to ignore it I always feel it when she touches me.

"It's okay. Really just try to breathe and relax, would it be okay to give you a hug?" She asks me and I nod yes, still keeping my eyes closed.

She then tentatively starts to put her arms around me. I just stand there and do not reciprocate at first. She hugs me around my waist instead of my shoulders and I realize that I have not hugged another adult, other than Robin in a very long time. More than that, usually Robin puts his arm around me but I don't know if I've ever been hugged quite like this.

She's slowly tightening her grip on me as her hands easily go around my waist and pull me close to her, and as she keeps pulling me closer I let out a deep breath. It's almost as though I deflate into the hug. So much tension being released and I finally raise my arms to go around her shoulders and up around her neck. If we were swaying you could say that we were intimately dancing with barely any space between us.

I tighten my grip and I inhale deeply, taking in her scent when I do. She smells like Henry does after being out in the yard, like fresh cut grass and a citrus coconut scent that must be her shampoo. It's all very intoxicating at the moment. And it feels so good, so safe to be here in this moment.

Her grip on me doesn't falter and neither does mine as I slowly rest my head against her shoulder. Her grip actually tightens when I do it, and I can feel her calm breath wash over me. I feel it down my neck, and when she inhales I know she is taking me in as I just did her.

We stand for another minute before I start to pull away, and she slowly detangles herself from me. But before I can fully pull out of her hold she holds her hands at my waist.

"I meant what I said Regina, I am here for you, however you want me to be." She whispers and she's looking at me and I feel lightheaded.

I don't know what she means by it at first, but then when I see her eyes flicker down to my lips I realize what she is implying. I internally begin to panic a bit, but try to keep my face neutral.

Did she want us to be more than friends? Did she think that I would want the same? I thought we were building a friendship but now I'm so unsure? It was all too much right now.

I see her slowly moving closer and just for a moment I hesitate in stopping her, wondering what it would be like to feel her lips on mine, but then I remember Ruby and their earlier conversation. How could she try this with me while still being with her?

I slowly pull back, and step out of her grasp. She looks a little hurt but her eyes are questioning more than anything else.

"Emma? What… what are you trying to do? What about Ms. Lucas?" I ask her, my voice betraying me as it quivers.

"I, I'm sorry I thought you wanted this too. I thought you said that you said you weren't sure how you felt about me. And why do you keep on bringing up Ruby?" the last part came out a bit irritated.

I go to sit back down and put some distance between us, and she follows and takes a seat as well.

"Well I am having some conflicting feelings but I was confused because I had never been really had a good friend. Whatever feelings I may have are for friendship Emma, I am sorry if I gave you the wrong idea. And I assumed that Ms. Lucas was your … partner?" I try to explain to her my reasoning but now she looks even more confused. "Is she not your partner?" I ask one more time for clarification.

Then I think she finally realizes what I am saying because she starts laughing to herself. I hardly think anything funny of this matter, but she almost looks slightly deranged and is very lowly talking to herself.

"So let me get this straight, for lack of a better word, you think that I was having phone sex with Ruby because you think that she's my girlfriend?" She asks me.

I slowly nod yes.

"Oh my… this can't be happening. Okay so we agreed earlier that we were going to be honest with each other. Right? So I am going to be brutally honest right now and hope that you don't hate me or kick me out after." She says, and I can see the nervous smile on her face, almost forced like she doesn't know whether to smile or throw up.

"I assure you Emma, as you have not judged me, I will not judge you, but just say it already." I am getting more impatient by the second.

"First of all, I am in no way dating Ruby Lucas. I met her when I got here and I needed a place to stay. She was really nice to me and instantly we had a connection. She was the first person who really befriended me, and when I was having issues with you and Henry I spoke to her about it. Does that answer your question?" She asks me and I can tell that she is holding back.

"Yes but that doesn't explain the conversation earlier, how she knew about your sexuality." I ask her.

"Oh.. kay. Yeah I wasn't having phone sex with her earlier, I was talking to her about how I feel about you."