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Chapter 14

I pour myself a glass of cider as I wait for Ruby in my study.

Ever since that scene I caused at the diner they have gone out for drinks together after work, and I know I was the one to push them together.

It shouldn't bother me because I know that she needs someone but I don't know how this will affect the timeline.

Graham had died, and now that he was still alive would she even ever get with Hook? Was I supposed to kill him a second time? Could I do it?

I think back to why I had done it the first time, and although it had been a mistake at the time, I know that deep down I was glad that Emma couldn't have him. Now though things were different.

But did I want things to work out between them? I had no right to be upset this time, especially since I had Robin waiting for me. So why couldn't I just let it go?

I hear the doorbell ring and as I approach the door I start to feel apprehensive. I hope she will be able to help me.

As I open the door the first thing I see are long legs, and then as I make my way up to her face I see a large smile plastered on it.

"Well hello there Regina, glad you approve of my clothes." She says as she sways by me, and I flush at being caught. What was wrong with me?

I close the door and lead her into my study and close the study door.

"I'm sorry Ruby I wasn't trying to stare, would you like something to drink?" I offer, quickly trying to change the subject.

"Yeah sure, I'll have whatever you are having." She says as she situates herself on the sofa.

As I turn to grab her a glass I see that my hands are shaking, I am so nervous and lately it's like I cannot even control my body. All of these feeling overloading me.

I have never even remotely felt an attraction to Ms. Lucas, but seeing her in that shorter than short skirt and very revealing top did quicken my heart rate.

As I approach her I keep my eyes anywhere but at her body and hand the drink over to her.

"So, thank you for coming… I don't exactly know where to start." I say, finally looking into her eyes and seeing a knowing smile.

"Okay I'll start then." She says taking a long sip from the drink, practically finishing it and placing it on the coffee table.

I just sit and wait, glad that I was able to get Henry to bed so he couldn't listen in.

"I know something happened between you and Emma because she is all of a sudden acting like Graham is the most interesting person, and we both know that's not true. I actually thought you were pissed about her flirting with him because I could have sworn that the two of you have been sleeping together, but you kind of confirmed my suspicions at the Diner." She says and I am shocked that she is right about so many things.

"I confirmed it? How?" I ask her because I don't quite follow.

"Well, and please don't get mad at me, but the way you spoke to them before you walked out was kind of like you were staking claim over her, and making sure he knew who she was coming home to. I honestly thought you were jealous of Emma liking Graham at first." She says and then she's laughing, "But oh was I so wrong, and the look on their faces when you walked out." She says.

"Well it may not have been my best moment to lose control like that…" I say to her, "I honestly do not know what came over me. She has the ability to completely infuriate me but I am so drawn to it." I confess to her then, looking down.

"Hey its ok, like I told you before, I am not here to judge, I am actually surprised you invited me over." She tells me, and I wish I had spoken to her sooner. She is being so kind to me.

"Although I greatly appreciate you coming over I can't help but wonder why you did. Let's face it, I am not the most popular person here, and I have always been fine with that, but you could have laughed in my face and told me off." I tell her because I honestly cannot believe she is actually here.

"I probably would have to be honest, but lately you just seem different. You seem more emotional, but in a good way. And I know that Emma is my friend as well so I will not take sides, but I would like to be yours too." She genuinely tells me I feel my eyes mist up before I can control it, and before I know it she has brought me into a hug and it feels so nice to have someone.

I try to collect myself before I pull back and as she brushes the hairs from my face I lean into her touch a bit. Then I realize what I did and add some distance between us.

"I apologize for that, but if you only knew what I've been through lately. This whole thing with Emma was definitely unexpected and it has completely thrown me. It so very nice to just have someone other than Henry to talk to, especially about what I am feeling." I tell her.

"It's really not a problem, surprising? Yes, but definitely not a problem. So...do you have any food because I'm going to need something to go along with this strong ass drink?" she says, so I take her glass and refill it, and then lead her to the kitchen.

….

I take out some of the food I had made for dinner, Emma's favorite, lasagna, and start to heat it up for her.

I turn around as we wait and notice her eyes lingering on my body, and it instantly brings a flush to my face.

"Ruby, are you gay?" It's out of my mouth before I can stop myself, and I know I am feeling the cider, and need to slow down.

"Well you don't hold back, do you?" she smiles, and then clears her throat like she's nervous. "I'll admit that I don't have a preference, I enjoy both sexes, and I can appreciate the fine female form." She says looking at me from head to toe and it makes me blush harder.

"I see, well…I never knew, not that I have a problem, but do you have feeling for me too? I saw you looking at me earlier, and again right now. If you are here in hopes of taking me to bed then I am sorry…." I start to say and she's off of her chair and in front of me in a second.

"No, that's absolutely not why I am here. Do I find you attractive? Oh hell yes, but that's not why I am here. And I'm sorry this is just who I am, I enjoy flirting but I am not trying to have sex with you Regina." She finishes and she's standing right in front of me and holding my wrist.

"What the fuck is going on?"

Both of us turn to look and see Emma walk in, obvious anger on her face and we both pull apart.

"Oh hey Em, Rajina here just invited me over to hang out, and she was warming me up some of that delicious lasagna." She says, taking it out of the microwave and placing it on the table.

I still haven't said anything and am just looking at her.

She is flushed, her cheeks red, and her hair is a little disarrayed.

"Oh I see, so just because I go out with Graham after work you decide to bring someone home? And she's eating my food." Emma slurs and that's when it hits me that she is definitely inebriated.

This makes Ruby get up and walk right up to Emma, getting in her face a bit.

"Okay first of all it's obvious you've had one too many so quiet down before you wake up Henry, and don't disrespect Regina like that. We already had plans, and like I said we are just hanging out." Ruby says, not moving.

Emma moves around Ruby and looks at Regina, "Oh and now you have her defending you too. Wow, you must have rally done a number on her. Did you kiss her too, lay with her and bed and make her feel wanted…." She trails off and I cannot believe she is saying these things.

"Emma stop, what's wrong with you? There's nothing going on here, and you do not need to airing out your dirty laundry in front of me." Ruby insists but I know that Emma is not listening to her at all.

She moves towards me, and I start to shift backwards.

"Emma…" I start to say but she stops me and walks towards me until my back is to the counter.

"What was it Regina, was I not who you wanted? All fucken week I've been wondering what it was I did wrong…" she says and I can tell she clearly doesn't know what she's saying as she's getting too emotional.

"Look it's obvious that you two need to talk about some… things. Regina if you are okay, I can see my way out." Ruby says and I can tell she doesn't want to leave but knows she shouldn't be here to hear these things.

"Emma please just sit down, I am going to walk Ruby out and be right back." I say to her and she steps back and walks out the room and into my study.

As I follow Ruby out I cannot believe how this evening turned out.

"Ruby I don't know what to say…I'm sorry." I say as I really do not know what to say.

"What Emma said back there, about kissing and being in bed? I know it's not my business but I can also see why she's upset." She says and it makes me smile despite the situation.

"You really are a great friend Ruby, and Emma is lucky to have you. But yes those were some of the things I wanted to talk about. I've been… confused…" I tell her, looking down.

She pulls up my chin so that I am looking into her eyes. "I'm your friend too Regina, so call me when you are free and maybe you can come to my place next time." She says and I smile.

"I'd really like that." I say and she just lightly squeezes my shoulder as she walks by me and out the door.

…

After cleaning up in the kitchen to give Emma some times to cool off I make my way into my study and close the door.

She's made herself a drink, and is staring into the fireplace that she has lit as well.

I know it's a bad idea, but I don't know how to deal with this either so I go straight to my tumbler of cider and pour myself a stiff drink. I drink the entire thing and pour myself another and take that back as well, enjoying the familiar burn at the back of my throat.

I then go and sit down and wait, wait for it to take affect and wait for her to speak.

After 10 minutes I think it's ridiculous that neither of us has said a thing so I approach her, and when I do I sway a bit, and decide to sit again, this time on a chair a little closer. I think of how silly it must have looked for me to do that and laugh to myself.

This gets her attention, as she turns around and looks at me.

"What are you laughing at? Is Ruby still here; are you two laughing at me?" She asks, and looks so confused and for some reason it just makes me laugh more, and now she's looking around the room for Ruby and I cannot help but giggle.

"C'mon Regina, what's so funny? And I cannot believe you brought Ruby here, she's supposed to be my friend and she's making a move on my woman." She says, and goes to sit on the couch across from me, completely slouching down and straightening her legs and crossing her hands over her chest.

"Oh my God Emma, you look jest like Henry when he's throwing a fit." I say and reach for my drink, the 3rd or was it 4th one since I came in here, finishing it I pour myself a refill, and also top off Emma's drink.

"Well he's a smart kid, and well… I am mad. She can't come in here acting like she can juss take you guys away. I mean, I don't even get you, but atleast Henry still likes me." She says and it's quite a sad pity party.

"Don't be so childish Emma, I like you very much." I say as I move over to her on the couch handing her her drink.

"Well thas not what you said. You were like, 'Ms Swan I don't like you like that, but I just like laying on top of you and sticking my tongue in your mouth'." She says.

I'm laughing again as I lean towards her and smack her arm, "I do not sound like that! And I did not call you Ms. Swan, you liar!" I tell her.

"Yah well you coulda cuz you only call me that when you are mad or tryin to act meat to me. But I know, I know you better than you think. And I know you wanted it, and I know you liked it.." She says the last part more quietly and when I look at her, her breathing has picked up and shes staring at my lips.

"Oh no Ms. Swan, you keep those lips away from me." I say, swatting her face away and leaning my whole body over hers.

"See what did I tell you! You just called me Ms. Swan again." She says and then she's standing up, and I fall to the ground.

She doesn't even care that I am now sprawled out on the floor as she goes to refill our drinks this time.

"Hey I could have split open my head on the coffee table right now." I say while staying on the floor, the room starting to spin a little.

"Yeah well… then I'd have to save you. You know I am trained in first aid, I even showed Graham a few things this week." She says as she sits back on the couch, and pulls me up with one arm.

"Here drink up, this cider by the way, is delicious." She says as she leans back, easy smile on her face now with her head tilting up over the back cushion.

"Are you attracted to him?" I ask her as I lean back on the couch as well, mirroring her pose.

"Who? Graham? I mean he is good looking and I know he wants me." She says, turning to me, "What's not to like?"

"Have you slept with him?" I can't help asking still looking away.

I reach for my drink taking the whole thing down while I wait for her answer.

She stays quiet and the silence is killing me.

"Emma…" I say turning to her.

"Why do you care, it's not like you haven't!" she says and gets off of the couch and walks towards the fire.

I have affectively ruined our happy moments from before.

"What are you talking about?" I say because I haven't, well I have but not in a long time.

"Oh don't act like you haven't, Ruby had told me before when I asked her if I had a chance with you. She said that you were sleeping with him, so she didn't think so." She says, but she's swaying and I know she's really drunk.

"Emma come here, come on, I have to tell you a secret." I say and she turns to me, she looks upset but more dejected and she trudges back to me like a 4 year old.

I don't know what I am thinking but I just blurt it out, "I may have slept with him long ago, but it's you that I want." I say and I pull her shirt towards me and close the distance between us.

I make my way onto her lap and straddle her and am putting little kisses on her lips. When I realize that she hasn't moved, or reciprocated any of the kisses, I pull back and look at her.

It's like she doesn't even know what I'm doing so I lift my legs a bit and almost bounce on her lap. Still nothing. I lazily bring my hand up to her face and wave it.

"Hello, earth to Emma, what's going on in there." I ask as I put my forehead against her.

"So you did sleep with him?" She says, and she looks hurt.

"Is that what it was about at the Diner? Were you jealous cuz I was with him, and you wanted him?" She asks and eventhough I know we are both not in our right minds, she really cannot be that stupid.

"No you idiot!" I say, pushing her back and climbing off of her lap and walking to refill my drink.

"Then what, huh? Cuz you made it clear you don't want me. I mean fuck Regina, I was ready to do anything you wanted and you just threw me away, I still want you, but now Ruby. What the hell?" she says sloppily getting up off the couch and walking towards me.

"I can't, I don't know Emma I can't tell you." I say but I am turning towards her, like a magnet and I cannot pull back. "I slept with Graham before, but it was nothing, I swear to you. And Ruby, she's helping me because I'm lost. I'm so lost." I tell her as I start to crumble knowing that this alcohol is making it so I have almost no filter.

I start to walk away from her, to try to maybe get to my room and lock the door but as fast as I think I'm going I only make it to the couch before she catches me and spins me around.

"Just stop holding back please. Just for once, be honest with me. I see it in your eyes Regina, I feel like I know you, like I've known you forever and when you lie to me it just hurts so bad. Please just tell me what you want, and just tell me the truth." She says begging me, and kneels before me and holding my hands. "Even if it's just for tonight..." she says and she's staring at me with such love and devotion in her eyes.

As I look down at her, both of us still slightly swaying, I think of all who have kneeled before me and how none of them come close to her. The mother of my child, the savior of us all, the strongest woman I have ever met is on her knees in front of me and I don't deserve it but it makes me feel so strong to have her there looking up at me.

"Oh Emma, get up off that floor you crazy fool, don't you ever kneel to me, ever!" I say taking her face in my hands and bringing it to mine.

With an inch between us I tell her, finally, admitting it to her and myself at the same time. "I do want you, I want you so much that I can feel it in my entire being, but you don't get it. I can't, I have responsibilities." I say as her eyes close, a tear slipping down.

As I wipe it away, she takes my hand away from her face, her eyes opening again.

"Then I have to go Regina, I can't be here anymore. I can't look at you and know that you want me too and I can't have you." She says finally pulling away.

And before I know it she's walking, more fumbling out of my study and towards the front door, and I have to stop her, and as I run after her I know that I cannot let her leave.

I get to her just as she has her hand on the door, and I shout, "Emma! Not you, please don't leave me, don't turn your back on me." I say, my voice sounding horse when it comes out and I realize I'm choking back sobs, tears streaming down my face.

"What the hell do you want me to do, I can't be here Regina." She slurs, and opens the door but I make it to her and grab her before she leaves.

"Stay, take me to bed, please. Just don't go." And it's the last thing I say before she turns towards me and in one swift motion I am airborne as she lifts me towards her and kisses me deeply, frantically and more wet than I have ever been kissed.

It's all so sloppy and as she fumbles to carry me back into the house I hold on for dear life, not daring to let go; to let her go.

She kicks the door closed once we are in, and I think about Henry for a minute, glad he sleeps like a log, and that our walls are so thick.

I pull back from her just enough to place my face in her neck, "Shh we don't want to wake the whole block." I say, and then feeling too intoxicated by her smell, I start to press open mouthed kisses on the skin I find there.

She just mumbles incoherently and leads us back towards the study, kicking that door shut as well.

I need more skin to taste and feel so I start to pull at her top and while shes still carrying me and she must lose her balance because all of a sudden we both hit the floor, an audible oomph leaving our mouths.

She's still in top of me, and I had managed to get her shirt over half of her head before we fell so that when I look up at her she has it stuck halfway up her body and over her head.

As she eyes open and she looks at me I cannot contain the laughter that comes out just by looking at her.

"Hey what's so funny?" she asks and it makes me laugh more and pull her further into me.

"You, Emma, Just you being you." I say it more lovingly that I meant to, and I think she hears the tone as well because then she's looking at me as she slowly pulls back and finishes pulling her shirt over her head and throws it behind her.

This leaves her with only her black sheer bra and her skinny jeans. And the site is enough to make me almost come undone before she even really touches me.

"You are so hot" I tell her and then blush profusely feeling so young in that moment.

"Oh really Madam Mayor, that was very eleqant, eleoqiant… uhh you know what I mean." She says and I cannot help but laugh at her even more. She's just so different from me but I can't help but be enamored by it.

"Oh Ms. Swan what am I going to do with you?" I ask her teasingly.

"Anything you want." She says, and even though I know it's meant to be lighthearted, it still thrills me to no end, and I finally pull down her neck and bring her lips to mine again.