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Chapter 53

Sansa walked downstairs early in the morning, her guards trailing behind her. She noticed they were extra-cautious as they followed, looking around for any source of danger to her. As she passed the dining room, Sansa saw that Lady Alys was seated at the dining table, having tea and toast. She walked in and leaned down to hug the older woman who had been so kind to her since she'd arrived at Casterly Rock.

"Oh, my dear, I was so relieved to hear that you and Julianna were safe."

Sansa smiled and sat beside her, taking her hand. "I'm sorry that you had to be deceived. I hated the thought of people thinking I was dead when I was not."

Lady Alys shook her head. "I understand. We all do. And in light of what happened to poor Cersei…it seems Jaime was wise to hide you and the babe away. How does he fare?" she asked quietly.

"He's still sleeping. He wasn't…he was quite distressed last night. Holding Julianna seemed to bring him comfort."

"I'm certain you brought him comfort as well."

She nodded. "He's taking it quite hard."

"I imagine so. He and Cersei were always so close and…It is so tragic for Jaime and for poor Myrcella and little Tommen." Lady Alys dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief and Sansa felt for her. She knew the woman cared for Cersei and had known her since she was a baby. Sansa had spent quite some time staring at the portrait of Cersei and Jaime as children, and they both seemed very sweet and innocent. Lady Alys didn't seem to know how terrible Cersei had turned out.

"One of her handmaiden's found her and…Jaime couldn't even bring himself to see her body. He refused to leave his solar. The Maester said she was strangled. I never thought Stannis Baratheon so dishonorable that he would send someone to kill you or Cersei. She was such a happy little girl growing up. The capitol changed her, of course, but…She was interred with Lord Tywin and Lady Joanna, straight away, in the crypts. Jaime insisted. I'm glad he's not alone. It's so sad that he and Tyrion are the only ones left. And Tyrion…well, who knows where he is now." Sansa patted Lady Alys's hand gently. "Would you like something to eat, my dear?"

Sansa shook her head. "No. I mean to go back upstairs soon. I don't want Jaime to be alone for very long, but I wanted to have some food sent up for us."

"Sansa, you did not have to come downstairs for that."

"I also wanted to see you," Sansa said quietly. "You've been so kind to me since I arrived here."

Lady Alys hugged her again. "I'm very glad that you are all right. Take care of Jaime. I'm here if you need anything."

Sansa smiled and left the dining room, rejoining her guards. Jaime had been sleeping when she left their bedchamber. She expected that the large amounts of alcohol he'd been drinking all night and all day yesterday was keeping him in bed. It hurt Sansa to see that Jaime was feeling such pain because of Cersei's death. Not that she was jealous, but because she hated to see Jaime in pain. He had scared her last night, he looked so broken, but she had hope after seeing how much his mood had improved when he was able to touch her and hold Julianna.

Jaime is mine and I'm going to take care of him. As much as he angered her at times, and had a smart mouth, he loved her and he was very sweet to her. There was nothing she would not do for him.

Sansa quietly opened the door to the bedchamber she shared with Jaime. He was still asleep and Sansa crept over to the bed, and smiled, seeing that Julianna was still asleep in her little basket. She carefully lifted the basket into her arms and moved it to a chair in front of the fire, so she would be warm. Sansa took off her gown and got back into bed with Jaime, wearing only her thin shift and began running her fingers through his hair. His arm tightened around her waist, pulling her close to him.

Sansa tilted her chin up and kissed his lips. His eyes opened and Jaime smiled softly. "Good morning, Ser Jaime," she said with a smile.

He kissed her again, leaning towards her. "Good morning," he said quietly. "My sweet, sweet little wife." She rested her hands against his chest, brushing his hair from his brow and frowning at the sadness in his eyes. "I won't…" he paused, touching his head, no doubt feeling pain in his head from the copious amounts of alcohol he'd consumed. "Don't worry, Sansa. I won't continue in this manner. She's forgotten."

Sansa shook her head, kissing his temples and stroking his hair. "I don't expect you to forget her. But…I don't want you to hurt or feel guilty," she finished with a whisper.

Jaime kissed her. "Give me a little time." She nodded. "Where's the babe?"

"Sleeping in front of the fire." She slowly ran her hands over his chest. "I thought we could lie here alone for a while, until some food is brought up from the kitchens."

She could see interest in his eyes, behind the sadness. "I thought it was too soon," he murmured, twirling her hair around his finger.

She blushed brightly, looking down. "It is for…that…but…" she leaned forward and kissed him, softly at first, and then teasing his mouth with her tongue until he opened his mouth to her. She shyly slid her hand down his body, closing her hand around his length, smiling as she felt him beginning to harden.

"Sansa…" he gasped, burying his face against her neck. Since Julianna was born, they had only kissed and cuddled, usually with the baby in their laps, but she knew that a little bit of physical intimacy would comfort him. "So you'd like me to treat you as if you were a maiden?" She could hear the amusement in his voice and was glad that she was able to brighten his mood, even if it was at the expense of her sensibilities.

She giggled as he rolled her onto her back and stared into her eyes for a long time before reaching his hand to her face. "You're so beautiful and…you care for me so much. I don't deserve you."

She tilted her head and kissed him. "Of course you do. You care for me as much as I do for you."

"That I do. I'd do anything for you," he whispered, burying his face against her neck, first just breathing heavily and then he began to kiss and suck on her neck. "I love you." She knew he was trying to mark her – it was something he enjoyed doing though it had embarrassed her a few times when his little love marks were visible to others who had smiled at her knowingly.

Sansa felt his hand roaming over her body and pushed against him, coaxing him onto his back. "Let me love you…and make you feel good," she whispered, before covering his body with her own.

They spent the morning kissing and touching, cuddled up in each other's arms until Julianna began crying for their attention. It appeared to Sansa that she had managed to lift her husband's spirits a bit. Or at the very least, to distract him.

They spent the entire day in their bedchamber with their baby. Jaime was still exhausted from his days of not sleeping, and when Julianna was ready for a nap, Jaime had curled up on the bed with her while Sansa worked on her sewing by the fire, her chair turned so she could glance over at her family every now and then. My family, she thought, as she watched them sleep. Nothing can take them from me now.

…

Jaime woke up alone, his head pounding. He looked around the room and realized that Sansa must have taken the babe and allowed him to continue sleeping. It had been a week since Cersei's death and Jaime had not left the rooms he shared with Sansa. After Cersei's death, he'd spent the next night and day in his solar drinking until he was able to dull the pain.

Jaime had been exhausted and miserable when Sansa came to him in his solar. As much as he did not want her to see him in such a pathetic state, seeing her was like a breath of air to a suffocating man. She'd touched him gently and bathed him and fed him. It had always been difficult for Jaime to allow others to see his vulnerabilities. But with Sansa, it was a comfort to see her and for her to hold him. Once he had held their baby and rested his head in Sansa's lap, he had felt safe and calm for the first time since he held Cersei's dead body in his arms.

It was difficult for him to think about his twin. It was thinking about her that had caused him to sweep everything off his desk and to smash the wine glass in his hand. He never thought that he would live when she didn't. And he certainly never thought that she would die by his hand.

He wished that Tyrion were here and still had love for him. He felt guilty that Sansa had to bear the entire burden of comforting him. She had been very loving and patient for the past week, lounging in bed with him and letting him kiss her and hold her for hours when he needed to forget his pain. As much as he wished to make love to her, it was far too soon after she had birthed the baby. Though he readily accepted the physical affection she could offer him.

Jaime dragged himself out of bed, dressing and going into the nursery, seeking out Sansa. He was surprised to see Lady Catelyn there, holding the baby, rather than Sansa. "Mother Stark, I had not thought to see you here this morning."

Lady Catelyn regarded him cautiously. "Sansa went downstairs to take care of a small matter with your steward. She'll be right back. You needn't worry, her guards went with her." Jaime nodded. "She's quite good natured," she murmured, looking down at the babe in her arms.

"Despite her paternity," Jaime said with a knowing smile. "With any luck, she'll take after her mother."

"She already does. In looks and temperament." He watched Lady Catelyn stroke the baby's leg, no doubt remembering when Sansa was a babe in arms. "Sansa means quite a lot to you, doesn't she?"

"If she had been killed…it would have been the death of me as well," he whispered. "And she and the babe have been a great comfort since Cersei…" He looked away, gazing out the window, only looking back when he felt Lady Catelyn's eyes on him.

She met his eyes. "Despite what we've been told about the queen's death…I can imagine what actually happened." Jaime shifted uncomfortably, sitting in the chair opposite Lady Catelyn, unable to focus on anything but the babe in her arms. I did what I had to, so my daughter could grow up safe. He was surprised when she placed the baby in his arms. "I know that…you did what was necessary to protect Sansa. And to protect the little one," she said, nodding toward the baby.

Jaime looked down in shame. No matter the reason, he couldn't feel good about having killed his sister. "What you speak of is dishonorable. Even to save Sansa's life. You know that. Eddard Stark would certainly would disapprove of such an action. Despite my duty to Sansa. And to her," he finished with a whisper, shifting the baby in his arms so she could rest her head against his chest, which he knew comforted the babe.

"I know anything you did was to protect Sansa. And your daughter. I would never disapprove of that. Perhaps now you understand the love that a parent has for a child. Perhaps now you understand doing anything to protect them, and not allowing anyone to dare harm them." He nodded as Julianna closed her eyes, resting against him. "Perhaps now you understand why I cannot rest until I know how my son, Bran, fell from that tower. You do know what happened to him, don't you?"

Jaime looked down at the babe in his arms, and knew that if someone had harmed her – if she'd suffered a fall as the Stark child had – Jaime would not rest until he found out what happened to her. "Perhaps I do," he said quietly.

"How did he fall?"

"I pushed him."

…

I know, I know, that was a cruel place to end it. Obviously, Jaime and Catelyn will continue their conversation in the next chapter…and where is Sansa?

And in a couple of chapters, more residents of Westeros will make their appearance – either in person or by raven. As always, thank you for all of the reviews. The feedback is appreciated.