Had to get this chapter out before I went on vacation. Don't worry, I'll only be gone a week. And as soon as I get back I'll be active again! Now that school's out I'll have a lot more time to write! So Yay! Let's celebrate with a new chapter.

Bonus info: this chapter focuses a little more on Leonardo. It is told from his POV. But don't worry, Raphael is still an integral part! Here we see a conflict emerge right from the beginning as Michelangelo (yes, mild Michelangelo) and Leonardo come head to head. Enjoy and Please Review!

Ch. 23-Just between us: these special moments

Everyone was crying. Michelangelo was a nervous wreck and he wouldn't stop crying his eyes out as he sobbed how it was all his fault. As if he could have controlled the fact that Raphael took that hit for him.

Donatello, the brainiac himself, was teary eyed. I was already terrified enough. I can't even begin to imagine how much Donatello's role as the family medic adds even more pressure and stress into how he reacts. I know that if Raphael's life were in my hands I would be too afraid to do anything for fear that something would go wrong. Being the doctor requires a unique form of strength that no one else in the family, except maybe Master Splinter, can display. The fact that his patients are his brothers must make it even harder.

Mikey was balling. I don't think I've ever seen my younger brother cry so much. He shouldn't cry. It doesn't suit him. Doesn't fit his personality.

Even Master Splinter has an odd tear or two running down his face. Of course he tries to downplay them by attributing them to 'something in the air.' But that's not quite the truth is it?

It isn't until precisely that moment that I realize every one of them is staring at me. Michelangelo's sobs quieted as he dealt me a stare comprised of shock, anger, horror and pain. I stare blankly back, not quite understanding why my younger looks that way. Belatedly I realize that Donatello has a more subtle version of the same stare on his face. A strange zing runs up and down my spine. What's going on?

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Leo?" Mikey asked, with tears still in his eyes.

I resisted the urge that welled up inside of me to reprimand him for his language. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"How can you not care?! Our brother is in there!" Mikey pointed to the lab, "He's in there! He almost DIED, Leo! He almost DIED! Does that mean anything to you?!"

My eyes narrowed and my temper flared. Huh. Usually Raphael is the only one who can get me riled up. I guess, in a way, he still is. "What the hell are you trying to say Michelangelo?!" I growled dangerously, using the height difference between Mikey and myself to my advantage. "Whatever the fuck you're trying to imply Michelangelo Hamato you can come right out and say it!"

"If you cared about Raphael you would have done something, said something by now! Haven't you noticed you are the only one here who isn't crying or at least teary-eyed? Geez Leo I know you and Raph don't exactly get along but the least you could do is act like you care! Instead of walking around like a king without even giving a damn!"

I went into an absolute rage and surged at Michelangelo. Fortunately, Master Splinter shot forward and was able to prevent me from hurting my younger brother. I can honestly say that I have never been so angry in my entire life and I probably will never be again. I wonder, is this how Raphael feels all the time? "How dare you accuse me of not caring! I know Raphael better than I know myself. He's my brother, my immediate younger brother, and you have absolutely no idea of all the shit that we've been through. You will never begin to understand it. I suggest you back off." I said in his face. I felt pleased as he at least had the decency to shrink down as he saw the anger in my eyes. I stormed past him in the direction of my room, making sure to bump his shoulder as I went. "And Mikey." I called as I moved past. He looked over at me and I glared back over my shoulder at him. "Just because I'm not crying doesn't mean it doesn't hurt."

It had been almost a week and a half since then.

Almost a week and a half since Raphael nearly got himself killed. It was the first time. And deep on the inside, I knew and acknowledged that it wouldn't be the last. I still haven't really forgiven Michelangelo for what he said. I hated to admit it, but Mikey's accusations had really stung. They made me doubt whether they realized just how much I cared about them. Raphael especially. We fought all the time and if my brothers thought that I didn't care…then…what would Raph think?

I wake up on the couch to find myself completely in the dark. Literally, not figuratively. There was a familiar weight leaning against my side. The shape was one that I knew well. It was the oblong shape of a shell that pressed lightly against mine. I allowed my eyes to adjust to the dark as I tried to recall what I had been doing beforehand. The last thing I remember was sitting down to watch a movie. About ten minutes in Raphael joined me on the couch. He was allowed to be up as long as he wasn't doing anything strenuous. Right now though, I'd say he was sleeping, if his snoring was any indication. I could feel his head resting lightly on my shoulder and I made no sudden moves. I wasn't about to do anything that would wake him.

He was leaning so heavily against me that I was a little worried, so I reached out and moved over, laying Raph down gently on the couch. Sensei must have turned off the movie we were watching sometime while the two of us were asleep. I stood and made my way over to the television. A hand grabbed my wrist and I tensed.

"Where 'r you goin?" He drawled sleepily.

I blinked down at him for a moment before actually forming an answer. "I was going to put the movie away."

He said nothing, so I went ahead and put the movie away.

After a long silence he spoke, his voice still heavy with sleep. "So what's up with you?"

"Pardon?" I muttered distractedly.

"You've been acting out lately. What's up?"

I turned in his direction and pretended I wasn't paying attention. "I haven't been acting out. What makes you say that?"

"You've been avoiding me ever since I woke up. I want to know why."

I frowned. That wasn't the intention. I've been trying to avoid Michelangelo and Donatello, not Raphael. I guess that since Raph has been spending most of his recovery time so far with Michelangelo, he thought I was avoiding him. I guess I should set the record straight. "I wasn't avoiding you, Raph."

"Oh no?" he asked with an eye-ridge raised. He looked vaguely confused, but I could tell that he had accepted it was the truth.

I sighed. My hotheaded brother wouldn't be satisfied until he knew everything. "I'm avoiding Michelangelo."

"Mikey?" He asked, his voice sounding surprised. "Why the hell are ya avoidin' Mikey?"

I glared at his smirking expression. Eventually his smirk melted into a frown. I frowned and didn't grace the question with an answer. Raph's eyes narrowed.

"Why won't ya answer the question?" he asked.

I refused to meet his gaze. "Some words were said." I said slowly. "Words that won't be easily forgiven or forgotten."

Raphael stared at me wonderingly for a moment before his eyes darkened with understanding. "Mikey said something about how everybody was upset."

I bristled, my fists clenched. "He dared to accuse me of not caring." I stated evenly.

Raph nodded solemnly. "I'm sure you set him straight."

"I almost punched his face in." I glared at him as he scoffed. "I did."

"Oh I'm sure you did. And don't ya feel guilty about either. Mikey had absolutely no right to say that ta ya."

"I don't feel guilty about it." I said, all the while scolding myself on the inside for the lie.

"Then what the hell is botherin' ya? Dammit Leo, just come right out and say it!"

"I—I don't think I want to…"

His green eyes sent me a doubtful glance. Finally we made eye contact. It was a mistake on my part. I should have known Raph would see right through me. But unfortunately it didn't occur to me beforehand.

"I know that you care about me, big brother." He stated as he stood and placed an emerald green hand on my shoulder. His neon green eyes stared deep into mine. "I know that you love me. I know that you would do anything to protect me. I understand you better than they do. They can't see through you like I can. Guess you and I are just too alike for our own good. I know you better than you think I do. I trust you with my life. You're my brother and my leader. You always will be. Even if I don't act too happy about it sometimes. Even if I hadn't made it…"

I stared at him with terrified eyes. Raphael had unknowingly voiced my innermost fear. That I would lose one of my brothers, and never know whether he had ever forgiven me for all of our harder moments. I dreaded learning that one of my brothers would die without knowing how much I care. I expected Raph to be gloating, but instead his eyes were soft and understanding.

He grinned and pulled me into a one-armed cross between a hug and a headlock. "I love you too bro." After a long pause he added, more quietly, "And…for the record. I don't mean half the things I say, either."

I smiled and pulled him into a real hug. Then I smirked. "Does this mean I'm not a stiff-assed prick?"

"I said half the things I say."

My eyes narrowed and I punched him good-naturedly in the arm. "Take it back."

He smirked, "Make me."

"Why you…" I jumped on him and we began to wrestle. I took care to avoid his injuries.

His laughter made my heart soar. I knew that everything was going to be alright. I'll worry about the situation with Michelangelo later. But right now, this is a moment for me and my hotheaded little brother. Nothing else matters. Not right now. Not at this moment. This was just between us.

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