SPOV

After a day or so, I was finally allowed to have visitors. Everyone was so quiet and gentle with everything when they were around me. Rosalie catered to my every whim, which I enjoyed, but it was kind of depressing the way everyone just kind of sat around. I missed seeing Emmett and Jasper wrestle in the middle of the floor, and Alice flutter around in excitement. But, I was sure that Mom and Dad had given them strict orders to keep everything peaceful.

"Alice," I asked. "Will you turn on my stereo?"

"Sure, "She nodded. "What track?"

"Uh, three." I said. She pressed the button and I could hear the electric guitar riffs.

"You know Esme and Carlisle wouldn't want you listening to this." She warned.

"They had no problem with it before." I said as she sat back down on my bed. "I just want things to be normal again. All I want is to forget that this whole thing ever happened."

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about...you know, everything that happened?" Rosalie asked. "You can if you want."

It was just us girls, so if I wanted to, now would be the time.

"No." I told her. "There really isn't anything to talk about. You guys pretty much know what happened, I don't want to bring it up again."

I held my breath as another wave of pain shot over me. Bella put her hand on my leg and Alice took my hand.

"Your hip?" Rosalie asked.

"No," I managed.

"Your shoulder." Alice said.

I shook my head. "I feel like I just got punched in the stomach." I winced as it happened again.

"Are you gonna be sick?" Rosalie started reaching for the trash can.

"No," I mumbled. "Yes."

I leaned over the bed and threw up the little bit of solid food I had been able to eat. Alice held back my hair and rubbed my back. I could hear my parents coming up into my room.

"Sydney, are you okay, sweetheart?" My mom asked, coming over to where I was. "Are you hot? Do you want me to turn the fan on?"

"No, it was like I got punched or something." I saw my dad slowly close his eyes.

"I'm gonna go get my X-ray scanner." He said before leaving.

Everyone suddenly had these blank, yet horrified expressions on their faces. Rosalie looked at Bella, then at Renessmee. Bella looked at Mom.

"What are you guys not telling me?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" Rosalie asked.

"I'm not blind. I can see the way you guys looked like you just saw a ghost. What's going on?"

Dad came back up, hauling his X-ray machine. Everyone cleared away from my bed as he took the x-ray of my abdomen.

"I'm going to go develop this, just let me know if you need anything. Okay, princess?" I could tell that his mood had shifted. He was hiding something.

"Dad," I said, grabbing his sleeve."What's going on?"

"No need for you to worry about it, darling." He kissed me on the forehead. "How about you just rest up for a little while, hmm?"

"Okay." I said. Everyone followed him out of my room and went downstairs.

I laid back and tried to go to sleep.

My vision blurred, and I was staring at Bella. She was so thin, still human. She was screaming and there was blood everywhere. Her stomach was bulging, she was pregnant. I remembered this dream. Renesmee was born and Bella smiled weakly.

I woke up with a jolt. It took me a moment to come back to the present. I knew that my dreams tended to have to do with what was happening around me. What did this one mean? Bella wasn't pregnant, but...

I looked at my stomach. I held my breath so that it wouldn't move. But it did and I felt another intense wave of mind-numbing pain. I screamed from the pain and the shock of my realization. Tears ran down my face uncontrollably.

My mom came up and took me in her arms gently.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

"I had another dream... and my stomach..." I gasped. "I'm pregnant aren't I? That's what you guys got all weird about isn't it?"

She just looked at me. "I'm so sorry baby."

She sat down on the bed and I just sobbed into her shoulder. This couldn't be happening.

"I thought I was going to get to move on from this. That I would eventually be able to forget." I sobbed. "I'm never gonna be able to forget what...what he did to me..."

"As far as we know, you are." She said, trying to be calm. "But, you don't have to be. If you want... you can always... you know, get rid of it."

I never thought that I would hear my mother advocate abortion. I knew I wasn't ready to have a baby, but I didn't think I was ready to go through with an abortion either. I certainly didn't have the option to give it away.

"What am I going to do?" I sobbed.

"This is your choice." She said. "If you want to think about it, that's fine too."

I decided to just think about it. A few days passed. I continued to go through insane pain every time the...fetus... moved. I had done the math. I was one/fourth vampire and Sampson was half. That would make this thing 5/8 vampire. That was more than me.

Rosalie and I were reading magazines on my bed, when it started moving again.

"I know it's hard to see it now," She said after it had stopped. "But you're really lucky."

"You wanna explain that one to me?" I asked.

"You have the chance to make something good out of what would be a terrible situation."

"Are you serious right now?" I asked her. "This is a terrible situation!"

"Sydney..."

"No!" I snapped. "I'm pregnant because I was raped! I was locked underground and raped as part of some sick science experiment. Or did you forget that part? Yeah, Rosalie, I know you've always wanted a kid. I thought I did, too. But not like this! Not something that's killing me from the inside out!"

"Sydney, calm down-"

"Why? Why should I? I don't want to be a mother at sixteen! I don't want to live with a constant reminder of what he did to me! All I wanted was to forget that this ever happened, but I can't!"

My mom came up.

"What's going on?" She asked.

"I was just trying to remind Sydney that some of us would love to be in her shoes right now."

"You know what, Rosalie, if you want this baby so badly, then as soon as it pops out, it's yours! I don't want it!" I snapped again. " I don't want anything to do with it."

Rosalie got up and left. Mom sat next to me.

"Are you okay?" She asked. "It's been a while since I've seen you go off like that."

"I don't know." I said. "It's like all the anger I've had bottled up this whole time just came out."

"Did you mean what you said?" She asked.

"I don't know..." I admitted. "I don't know what I want. I don't know how I'm going to react to anything anymore. I could see it and be completely in love, but right now all I can think about it Sampson."

"It's going to take time to get over it." She said. "You need time to grieve, and sort everything out in your mind."

I squeezed her hand as I was swallowed in pain again.