AN: HKS - re: "This was great! And damn it, Liv! Bad!"... Thankyou. Always wanted to write a Liz/Lena scene (hence why I made them a bit younger too) ;-). And yes, Liv was quite naughty watching them, teehee! Niki fanfic Reader: re - "I love when there is drama and there seems to be alot of drama"... the drama will ramp up for sure. If/when they return, hehehe. But there will be lots of fun (ahem, lady love) during Rumspringa.

AN2: Thankyou to readers that are sticking with me and giving this story a chance :-). I know the last chapter wasn't really what readers expected to happened, but it's what my muse told me to write. I promise any more lady loving will definitely be Alex and Olivia, and our lovely ladies only ;-). A little more background information in this chapter regarding certain characters and the fallout of Olivia watching what she did ;-)

Olivia reentered her bedroom via the sash window as fast as she could, then closed it in desperation. She stripped out of her apron and dark dress, tossing the clothes in the wicker laundry basket residing in the corner, before quickly washing her face with the jug and basin on her small marble top wash stand. She was quite thankful that she had already removed her black stockings and shoes before she'd left the house. Olivia really disliked wearing them... particularly the black cotton stockings during summer. The shoes she didn't mind, but she much preferred sandals if she had to wear something on her feet. But bare foot was best in Olivia's opinion. She dried her face with the towel, slipped on her night gown over her button up camisole and short pantalette bloomers and jumped into bed. She pulled the bed linen up to her chin and placed her head on the pillow.

Noone would know she'd been there.

Noone would know what she saw.

She widened her eyes then slammed them shut as she heard the front door being unlocked.

Surely noone could?

Only Lena had the spare key to the house, and Donald was wouldn't be back until tomorrow.

Maybe Maemm was just checking on her again with Daett being away? Olivia tried to calm her breathing as she heard footsteps approaching. She pretended to be asleep as her bedroom door opened.

"Olivia," Lena said quietly from the door way.

The young brunette remained perfectly still, her breathing calm. Even with her eyes closed, she could see the glow of kerosene lamp through her eyelids.

"Olivia," her Maemm called again.

Olivia listened intently and heard Lena sigh before hearing the door close. With the soft glowing light gone, Olivia remained still for several moments before she sat up. In her haste, she hadn't had time to wash properly and her feet were still dirty.

She sighed with relief as she began to get out of bed. She would be able to go and have a proper wash in the hip tub in the wash room next door. She would take that time to try and make sense of what she'd seen take place in the stable. Thank goodness she hadn't been caught!

"Kitchen table, Olivia!" Lena stated from the shadowy door way of the darkened room, startling Olivia with a squeal. Lena had only extinguished the kerosene lamp and not exited the room at all. "You have until I relight this lamp to be sitting at the table so we can talk."

Lena Petrovsky turned and left a visibly nervous Olivia Benson to put slippers on her dirty feet, and a dressing gown over her night gown.

Olivia saw both Lena and Elizabeth sitting at the small square kitchen table from the light of the 2 lit kerosene lamps placed where Donald would normally sit. The patchwork quilt was draped over the back of Donald's chair. Lena was sitting where she normally would when she stayed for dinner a few times a week, her black bonnet on her head and her coat buttoned up. Lena's particular seat was to Donald's left, if he were sitting at the table. Elizabeth was sitting opposite Lena, her bonnet and coat in place as well. Elizabeth's particular seat was normally for any visitor to the Cragen's house. Olivia sat down in her normal seat, opposite Donald's. Olivia's white bonnet was on the table in front of her assigned seat.

Caught.

Olivia reached out a hesitant hand before she placed the bonnet on her head, not bothering to tie the thin, short ribbons under her chin. She kept her eyes down, not daring to look at either woman. Only the sound of the crackling fire heating the tea kettle on the cast iron stove broke the heavy silence between all 3 women.

"How much did you see?" Lena kept her voice low and not at all threatening.

Olivia shook her head slightly, refusing to speak.

"Olivia, how much?" Elizabeth prompted, her tone soft.

Still Olivia wouldn't say a word. Surely she couldn't get in trouble if she didn't say or admit to anything. But she was still trying to process everything that she had seen that she knew to be forbidden. The 2 women that she trusted the most sitting on either side of her had broken so many rules, and she had too.

Lena could see the fear and confusion in the young girl's eyes when they made contact for a brief moment before Olivia looked down again. Lena reached over and gently raised Olivia's chin with her fingers, "Maedel... I trust that you will tell us the truth. How much did you see?"

"Everything," Olivia breathed after a long silence. She couldn't lie to her Maemm.

Olivia watched as Lena exchanged a look with Elizabeth who had taken a deep, calming breath through her nose. The dark haired woman gave Elizabeth a small smile which the blonde returned as Elizabeth exhaled. It was as if Lena had reassured Elizabeth without a single word being spoken, or any physical contact between the both of them.

Lena's attention focused back on Olivia, "Were you the only one there?"

"Yes, it was just me. Noone else was there," Olivia confirmed to both women.

"How did you see everything?"

"A knot hole in one of the panels. I promise I won't tell anyone what I saw, not even Alexandra! I usually tell her everything... but there are some things I can't and won't tell her, and this will be one of those things."

"You love her, don't you?" queried Elizabeth.

That question wasn't what Olivia had expected, though her reply was instant. "She's my best friend!"

Elizabeth clarified, "You're in love with Alexandra, aren't you?"

Olivia became silent again. Had she said too much? Had she been obvious? How did Elizabeth know?

"Neither myself or Elizabeth will be upset with your answer, Maedel. You know you can tell me anything," prompted Lena.

Even after everything that she had observed Lena and Elizabeth doing, Olivia couldn't admit to the truth, and it pained her not to. If it wasn't so forbidden, Olivia would tell anyone and everyone... even Alexandra herself.

Lena tried a different approach, "Remember a couple of years ago when you were afraid to tell me what was wrong and making you so distraught? I said you could tell me anything and I wouldn't get upset. So when you finally stopped crying you said you didn't know how you injured yourself because you hadn't done anything. It was only your menarche."

"MAEMM!" Olivia buried her face in her hands as Elizabeth stifled a chuckle. Could her Maemm be any more embarrassing right now by bringing that up?! And in front of Alexandra's aunt for that matter! At least Alexandra's aunt wasn't this embarrassing!

"Alexandra was sure she was dying when she menstruated for the first time, the poor girl. Took me almost half an hour to calm her down and reassure her she wasn't bleeding to death," Elizabeth directed her comment to Lena.

"I remember you telling me," Lena replied, trying not to laugh.

Olivia groaned in humiliation. Nope, it seemed Alexandra's aunt was just as bad. Why did Maemm's and aunt's to things like that?!

"Maedel," Lena waited as Olivia looked at her though her fingers. "I'm just reminding you that you can tell me anything and I won't get upset with what you tell me. You thought I'd be so angry with you for soiling your underclothes. Now... Elizabeth asked you a question, I would appreciate it if you answered truthfully."

Olivia begged as she lowered her hands from her face, "Please don't tell Alexandra, Alexandra's mother or Daett! I know it's forbidden, I can't help feeling the way I do about her! Katherine says Elliott makes her heart beat faster when she sees him, and that's what happens to me when I see Alexandra. It never really used to happen, but it's been happening more often lately." Olivia looked down in shame, "Do I disappoint you?"

"You could never disappoint me, Olivia. You have both myself and Elizabeth's word, we won't say anything to Alexandra or Donald... or Miriam." Lena's next question wasn't what Olivia expected, "Why were you out tonight?"

"She was probably going to visit Alexandra like she does so often," Elizabeth replied before Olivia could.

"You know about that?!" Olivia was stunned at Elizabeth's admission.

"Unlike Miriam, I hear you and Alexandra giggling and talking when you visit her after supper when you think noone else is awake."

Olivia panicked, "Please don't tell Alexandra's mother! I don't want Alexandra to get in any trouble. I visit her, she doesn't come and visit me ever!"

"How long have you been visiting Alexandra at night?" asked Lena.

"Since Alexandra was 6... after her father left the Village. She was very upset he left because he would read to her after Elizabeth tucked her in at night. I said I'd do that for her if she wanted me to, and she did. So I went and read to her one night after I knew Elizabeth would've tucked her in. Alexandra asked me to do the same thing for the next night and it's continued ever since. I only stay with her until she falls asleep, then I come home. Not every night though, but most nights."

Lena looked at Elizabeth who nodded her head in confirmation.

"We will talk later on with regard to you knowing about all this and not telling me!" Lena chastised Elizabeth before addressing Olivia, "What changed tonight?"

"I assumed Alexandra's mother was still awake when I saw light through the kitchen window."

Elizabeth shook her head, "I was the one you saw in the kitchen."

"I didn't want to get in trouble for being out at night, so I changed course to the stables and talked to Ruth for a time. I was about to leave and..." Olivia indicated to Elizabeth with her hand.

"I entered the stable," Elizabeth replied as the tea kettle began to whistle.

Olivia went to stand up and pour the tea out of habit but Elizabeth rested her hand on the young girl's shoulder as Lena took charge. The dark haired woman took 3 small plates and the tin of homemade cookies from the pantry shelf, removed the lid and placed the tin the middle of the table while the tea steeped in a fine bone china tea pot with a knitted tea cosy cover. Lena then prepared 3 tea cups with saucers, added extra sugar and milk for Olivia's before placing each one in front of the respective woman's place at the table. As she sat down, Lena passed a cookie to Elizabeth before she took one for herself. Olivia couldn't figure out why Lena and Elizabeth weren't telling her off for breaking the rules.

"You're being awfully quiet, Olivia." Lena took another cookie from the tin and held it out for Olivia to take.

"I'm not sure what you mean, Maemm." Olivia broke the cookie in half. She placed one half on the small plate and dunked some of the other half in her sweetened milky tea before popping the sodden part of the cookie in her mouth.

Lena prompted, "I was sure you'd have several questions for Elizabeth and myself... particularly after what you saw us doing. What we were doing would be seen as forbidden to most people."

She had a vast array of questions but didn't know how to ask them or whether she should ask them. Were they trying to entrap her? Were they trying to make her become even more trouble than she already was? Were they making her become even more confused? Because whatever they were doing, they were certainly succeeding. Olivia decided to cautiously ask, "How come you both have your hair shorter?"

"That's your first question? Our hair?" Elizabeth paused as she raised the tea cup to her lips.

"Short hair is forbidden!" Olivia justified. "As is the shortening of a person's name!"

Lena placed her tea cup on the saucer after taking a sip, "Olivia... a lot of things in the Village are forbidden, but not during Rumspringa. During Rumspringa, a blind eye is turned to most things forbidden. Only activities of a truly heinous nature will not be overlooked, nor tolerated by the Village."

"I thought Rumspringa was only for the older children. Daett has helped take the older ones to Rumspringa House this year," Olivia dunked another part of her cookie in her tea and ate it before it crumbled.

"That's correct, it's for the young adults. Rumspringa is taken in a person's 17th year of life. Some take Rumspringa for a few months, some take half a year, and some take a whole year for their Rumspringa before they choose to stay in the Village, or leave forever. It's their choice, and theirs alone. The Village Lores do not state, however, when a person's Rumspringa officially ends though. Elizabeth and I continue to relive Rumspringa each year."

Olivia hoped what she next said wouldn't land her in trouble, "That's not what you said in the stable."

"Technically, we both secretly continue to live Rumspringa throughout the entire year, Maedel. At the beginning of each new Rumspringa, we cut our hair to remind ourselves of our first Rumspringa."

Elizabeth added, "It's how short we both had our hair when we had our first Rumspringa. Cutting our hair was one of the first things we did, it was so liberating! Under our black Elders bonnets, noone knows seeing the Elder bonnets have the stiff brims and aren't see-through like your white organdy bonnets."

"I'm definitely going to cut my hair short as soon as I have my Rumspringa," Olivia confirmed which elicited small, breathy laughs from both Elders. "Maemm, what about calling Elizabeth... that shorter name?"

"I call Elizabeth a shortened version of her name to show her how much she means to me. It's my term of endearment for her. I'm the only one that ever calls Elizabeth... Liz... and until just a short while ago, we were the only 2 people that knew. That's why I always address her as Elizabeth in front of everyone else."

Still not wanting to talk specifically about what she had seen the women doing, Olivia instead inquired, "Did you... fall in love... with each other during your Rumspringa?"

"We'd fallen in love with each other before then. We shared our first kiss in Moses' stall the year before our Rumspringa. It was Noah's stall back then," Lena reminisced.

"You kissed me, Lena!" Elizabeth corrected before nibbling on her cookie.

"Will you tell me about it? Your Rumspringa, I mean." Olivia quickly clarified. Although being told what it was like to kiss someone else... a woman... was something Olivia wanted to know too. Especially the way they had kissed in the stable.

Lena and Elizabeth exchanged looks before Elizabeth nodded her approval for their story to be told. Lena took another sip of tea before she began.

"As you know, both Elizabeth and I were betrothed to marry, but our husbands-to-be were killed in the barn collapse. John James McCoy was to become my husband, and Elizabeth was to marry Leonard Briscoe."

"Kenneth Briscoe's uncle?"

"Yes, that's right. Maxwell Greevey, Michael Logan and Joseph Fontana also lost their lives in that accident. As did one young woman... our friend, Nora Lewin. Because of the collapse, Elizabeth and myself were the only ones to go on Rumspringa that year. We didn't want to go having just lost several close friends, but the lore states that everyone must take Rumspringa in their 17th year. Neither Elizabeth or myself really wanted to marry our husbands to be, we both knew it... but neither of us could say anything. It was expected of us to marry them. Maybe a higher power intervened for us?"

Elizabeth took over, "It was drummed in to us from a young age, 'Man shall not lay down with man, nor woman with woman as man should lay with woman, it is forbidden.' But forbidden things can be done during Rumspringa, and we were alone in Rumspringa House. We could finally be ourselves, and noone would know. We stayed for the entire year... it was wonderful! We both chose to stay after our Rumspringa, and because our husbands-to-be were killed, to the rest of the Villagers, particularly the 'old families', we have been deemed that we've remained 'in mourning'. Noone gets 'rebetrothed' in the Village."

"D-did you do... what you did... in t-the stable?" Olivia finally asked, her hesitance evident as she was unsure if she would be in trouble.

"Many times over," Elizabeth confirmed after exchanging yet another look with Lena.

"Why?" The question slipped out of Olivia's mouth before she realised. She began to backpedal, "I-I mean..."

Lena explained, "Sometimes when man and woman lay together, they intend to make a baby. But sometimes they lay together to express their love for one another. So seeing Elizabeth and I can't make a baby together, it's our way to show our love for each other. Olivia, it's very important for you to know that laying with someone, whether it be a man or woman, must NEVER happen before your own or anyone else's Rumspringa. It's deemed a heinous act if it EVER happens before then. It will not be overlooked or tolerated by the Village."

"Yes Maemm, I understand."

"Maedel, also know that you must NEVER force someone to express their love that way, and noone may EVER force you to do the same. Again, it's deemed a heinous act if it occurs. Both people must be willing to express their love that way."

"Who would force someone?" Olivia looked at both women with concern.

Elizabeth replied, "Sometimes men and women take without permission, unfortunately. You're old enough to know that's what happened to Serena... which resulted in your conception. Lena and I are the only ones that know this for fact. She swore us to secrecy, and we swore her the same."

Olivia whimpered in horror, "Mother?"

Lena took over, "Most of the Villagers just assumed she lay with an English man by choice because she wasn't betrothed to anyone at the time, but that's not the case. She could have possibly been betrothed to Maxwell Greevey, Michael Logan or Joseph Fontana, but you know what happened to them. During Serena's Rumspringa, an English man forced himself on her as she made her way from Main Town to Rumspringa House after a full day sewing at the tailoring job she had to make some money. Olivia, you need to know even though you were conceived through that heinous act, your mother loved you. She was going to leave the Village after you were born and raise you in the English world. But as you know, there were complications and before Serena died, she asked me to help raise you as if you were my daughter. She also asked that Donald help raise you too."

Olivia took her time to comprehend what she had just been told. She'd heard the rumours about being of English descent over the years, but she had always ignored them. Even now with the rumours confirmed, she didn't really care. Serena was her Mother, Lena was her Maemm, Donald was her Daett, and that's all that mattered to Olivia Benson. Lena and Donald had treated her with nothing but love and respect her entire life, as had Elizabeth and Alexandra. Miriam Cabot on the other hand was a different story altogether.

"Maemm, may I ask what did you swear Mother to?"

"Each year, Elizabeth and I volunteer to be the ones to bring the young adults back from Rumspringa House, so we can have some time alone. That particular year, Serena, Lois Preston and her now husband Harold, Miriam and Alexandra's father were taking their Rumspringa, but Lois and Harold returned to the Village after just a few months... Miriam and Alexandra's father after barely 2 weeks away. We arrived at Rumspringa House and Serena wasn't there at the time. Elizabeth and I began to remember what we did during our time. We were kissing and a heavily pregnant Serena walked in on us."

"All 3 of us were shocked for a couple of different reasons. I'm sure you can understand why, Olivia." Elizabeth couldn't help but laugh when she said, "It seems to me that Benson women have a habit of finding us out, Lena!"

"Seems they do, Elizabeth."

"I'm very sorry I watched the both of you. I knew I shouldn't but... I couldn't help it. And when I saw... what I saw you both doing... it looked... right. It made sense to me."

"Curiosity is not a bad thing. But you're correct, you shouldn't have kept watching. What we did inside of Moses' stable is very private to us. Although, I have a feeling you're just as embarrassed as we are for being caught?" Lena suggested.

Olivia nodded vigorously then took a gulp of her milky tea. Something was weighing on the young brunette's mind as she put her tea cup down.

"Maemm, so I'm not... the only one?"

Lena raised an eyebrow, "Only one what?"

"The only one that likes... someone of my own gender. I thought I was the only one."

"No, you're not the only one. Elizabeth and I are the same as you."

"I thought there was something wrong with me."

Elizabeth shook her head, "There's nothing wrong with you, Olivia. Nothing at all."

Olivia implored, "You both have to know I didn't choose to be like this."

"Lena and I understand. We didn't choose either... none of us did. We just are."

"So... the 3 of us are the only ones in the Village, yes?" Olivia wondered.

Lena voiced her thoughts, "We have reasons to believe there's at least 5 of us in the Village... people that like our own gender."

"6," Elizabeth corrected as she drained her tea cup.