03. The Fall
"Looks like this ain't no private car, so split up!" Barret jerked his head at Biggs, Jessie and Wedge, who started to walk further down the platform.
Cloud followed Barret and Tifa onto the train. As the door closed behind him and the train started to rattle, his ears picked up muffled mutters. Hoodlums again. God, don't I just have all the luck.
Cloud followed the voice. A man in a gray suit, stealing looks, not so subtly, at Barret. Cloud wondered if this secret terrorist group thing of Barret's was really working out. The secret part, that is. He also wondered if he'd made the right choice by deciding to stick with the group. Not that he had much choice.
Cloud let out a sigh; he might as well help. He sat down next to the man in the gray suit, the monster sword (as Jessie had called it) on his lap, ostentatious. He looked at the other passengers one by one, so that they can notice the Mako in his eyes and draw their own conclusions. The gray-suit man was the first to scurry out of the car, muttering something about those crazy young people nowadays.
Barret, oblivious to the situation, sat down in the now-empty seat next to Cloud.
"Yo, look at that! It got empty alluva sudden. What's goin' on?"
Cloud didn't bother answering. Tifa smiled, sitting across from him.
"So, what are we gonna do now?" Cloud asked.
"The hell you so calm about? You bustin' up my rhythm…" Barret complained, rustling about in his seat (it was too small for him). After a while, because Barret seemed to have forgotten his question, Cloud asked again.
"So what's our next target?"
"Hah!" Barret barked. "Listen to Mr. Serious-about-his-work!"
Cloud frowned. Maybe this secret terrorist thing wasn't working out after all. How could it, with Barret as their leader? Cloud felt tired, opened his mouth to ask the question for the third time, when the red lights started flashing.
They all got up in an instant. Cloud tightened his grip of the sword. The alarm was loud, piercing; the whole car blacked out, then flickered red, black, red. The train was still moving.
"That's odd. The ID checkpoint was supposed to be further down…" Tifa was muttering, checking her watch.
"Type A security alert! Unidentified passengers confirmed. A search of all cars will be conducted," a voice boomed midst the red and black, rumbling train.
"Damn!" Barret spat. Jessie burst in from the other car, face distorted in the light. She yelled something; but the alarm was too loud, and she had to shout again.
"We're in trouble! I'll explain later. Hurry! Get to the next car!"
"Unidentified passengers located in Car 1. Preparing to lock down."
And they had no time.
Barret slammed open the door to the next car, almost breaking it. People turned to stare. Cloud took in all the faces in one breath, then he was running, they all were, and Cloud remembered the red and green, in the Mako reactor. It felt like he were always running away from something.
"Let's go! Keep it up!" Barret yelled as he shoved past a surprised man. Cloud slid around him as the man stumbled. The train rattled. Tifa almost tripped and fell, but Cloud caught her before she did.
"Preparing to lock down Car 2," the voice boomed, just as Barret, Tifa and then finally Cloud slid into Car 3. The door sealed shut behind him, locking down with a searing beep.
"Hurry!" Biggs was suddenly in front of them and holding open the door. Barret frowned at him.
"Biggs, you know what to do, yeah?"
Biggs nodded tightly.
"Just run!" Jessie shoved them all in Car 4, gritting her teeth. The alarm was so loud it hurt his head. Cloud heard one of the passengers whispering, they must be AVALNCHE, and there went their cover. He kept running.
Car 5. There was an opening. Barret skidded to a stop. "All right, we made it! Yo, this way! We're gonna dive outta here!"
"Dive?" Tifa asked, chancing a glance out the window. It was all a gray and white blur. The train was still moving fast.
"Yeah, it's the only way out. Jessie, Biggs and Wedge are gonna stay on the train and meet us there," Barret explained quickly, struggling with the hatch.
"Stay? But…" Cloud looked back, dubious, but wind suddenly bit at Cloud's face as Barret had finally managed to throw open the door.
"They'll be fine!" Barret yelled.
The outside was a blurring mess. It looked like they were on an above-ground railroad. The train would go around in a circle in the slums, then head up to the plates. Any minute now; escape would be harder once they were on-plate. Cloud saw that this was their only chance.
"…Scary, huh." Tifa said. Cloud looked up at her. Her long hair was flying wildly about, hiding her face.
"Too late to be saying that now," he finally muttered. Wind cleared her hair; Tifa's face remained carefully calm, but Cloud knew her (thought he did).
Afraid. Cloud glanced down. It would be a long fall.
"Why'd you come along anyway?" He asked suddenly. He thought she might not have heard it in the roaring wind, but she had.
"Because…"
"Hey, you two! There ain't no time for that!" Barret yelled from behind. "Ain't no time to waste, do somethin'!"
"Unidentified passengers located in Car 5, preparing to lock down."
"Watch me jump." Tifa suddenly grinned, and all traces of fear, the forced tranquility, was gone. Cloud stared at her, her eyes gleaming a little with an emotion he did not know, and then she was gone. Cloud followed her with his eyes until she disappeared in a small white dot. Then he jumped down after her.
The freefall – he felt the air closing in around his throat, gravity pulling him down faster than he could fall. The world melted into nothing around him. Wind was choking him. And in that haze, the sears of shapes, he thought – he saw something – a face; staring back at him, like a dream. Cloud strained his eyes against the tears and the wind to get a better look, but the fall was over too quickly. All he had left was an impression of a color: bright blue (brighter than the summer sky), with shadows in the folds, deep blue shadows. He thought it could have been someone's eyes, except that he couldn't remember.
Or it could just have been a figment of his imagination.
He landed on dead leaves.
"Good. So far everything's going as planned." Barret said unconvincingly. Cloud was too tired to object, and he thought Tifa was, too. Barret carried on. "Better not let your guard down till we get to the sector 5 reactor. Biggs, Jessie and Wedge got everything ready for us, so move it."
Hollow echoes bounced off the empty train tunnels that, according to Barret, led to the reactor. The station was empty. It had fallen apart, tiles missing and bricks broken. A torn poster of Loveless flapped in the wind on an otherwise bare advertisement board.
"The reactor is here?" Tifa asked, looking at Barret. Cloud was following them a step behind.
"Yeah. Just down this tunnel. Nobody uses this station no more."
Unfortunately, it looked like Shinra had a good back-up security system (never could blame them for carelessness); long after the guards have left their posts, the electric sensors were still working. Light beams, teal green like Mako, blocked the end of the tunnel.
"Those light beams are the Shinra's security sensors," Cloud said, before Barret had the idea to march right into it. Barret stopped, looked back. Cloud frowned at the expression on Barret's face.
"Don't tell me our plan ends here."
"Well, it was Biggs and Jessie and Wedge that always did… the technical stuff…"
"Do you know how to disable this, Cloud?" Tifa asked. Cloud moved past Barret (who was looking a little squeamish) to inspect the beams. They looked like they were still in full operation. What a waste of energy, Cloud thought. He knew better than to touch them, though. One of the first things they teach to an infantryman: never do anything we don't tell you to do. And he saw the consequences, all right. That guy had burned instantly, fried, never spoke a word since.
"I can't do it. And we can't go any further, either," he said.
Then something caught his eyes; a tiny air duct. There was a fan, but the electricity was down anyway. He looked closer, his breath sending dust flying. After a second of hesitation, he removed the fan, breaking it off with a loud crack that echoed off the walls.
"This leads to the other side of the barrier, I think. I suppose the reactor's there?" He asked. Barret nodded, but shot a dubious look at the air duct encrusted with ancient dust.
"That's one damn tiny hole," he said. "You tellin' me to squeeze into that to get under the plate? No way."
"I think you could fit in… If you tried," Tifa said, trying to be consoling.
"I don't see another way," Cloud said.
He wasn't so excited about having to crawl through a tight air duct, himself. It would suffocate him; any kind of small, tight space did. But it was easier not to think about it, just get on with the job. Delay (delete) the panic. So he climbed up and into the air duct, ignoring Barret's continuing protests (he kind of saw his point, but really, there was no other way).
It was a long way. An eternity of gray dust so thick, embedded into every crack-line, cobwebs occasionally blocking the view. He kept crawling, though. He ignored the fear, shoved it away, didn't think – one of these days, he was suddenly going to find himself without a heart and not even know it.
When they finally emerged into the open air, Jessie was waiting on the other side. She only looked mildly surprised at finding them crawl through the air duct instead of walking.
"I'm sorry," she blurted, as soon as Cloud got out. She ran over to him, helped him brush the dust off. It flew everywhere, landing on Jessie's hair and clothes. Tifa was next. Then Barret; his pile of dust made dust mountains in the air. "The ID scan problem on the train – it was y fault," she said, coughing out dust.
"What you sayin', Jessie?" Barret narrowed his eyes.
"Cloud's ID card. I made it last night, and I guess – I overlooked some details." She turned to Cloud. "Next time, I'll give you something more decent."
Cloud nodded. Tifa was brushing her fingers through her long black hair, removing strings of dust.
"Well, we all made it here, didn't we?" She said, smiling at Jessie. "Isn't that right, Barret?"
"Yeah, yeah." Barret looked resigned. "Jus' be careful in the future, awright?"
"Yes, boss," Jessie said, solemnly. "I'll be back at the hideout working on it. Good luck to you guys!" With that she ran off, and Cloud was alone with Tifa and Barret and the mountains of dust.
Barret led the way from there. For a while they walked in silence; the clatter of feet against the metal walkway, the metallic jingle. Cloud not to think too much about what was beneath the (scanty, unstable) metal bridge too much. The machines, the pipes, whirring and pumping out Mako. He reminded himself that the bridge was meant to be walked on by technicians on a regular basis, so it was probably safe. Probably.
When Barret spoke, he was glad of the distraction. "So you guys are like… childhood friends?"
"Yeah. We've been friends since primary school," Tifa said from behind Cloud.
"Hmm." Barret considered this for a moment. "I dunno… it just doesn't cut the picture, you know? You and the SOLDIER boy here," he decided. Cloud didn't say anything.
"Well, he wasn't SOLDIER back then," Tifa said diplomatically.
"But still… I woulda pictured you with someone less…"
"Less…?" Tifa sounded amused. Barret flung his arms about wildly (which shook the metal bridge a little, but Cloud wasn't thinking about that), trying to pick the right adjective.
"I dunno, sullen? Grumpy? Robotic?"
"Oh, come on, Barret. Be nice. He's right here."
And that was when Cloud fell down. One moment, he was fine – then the next, the world flashed white for the briefest second, then he was falling, knees giving out.
Something flashed before his eyes.
The air was so thick, so much smoke. Smoke? Where was the fire? And – the Mako – sickening. The air was thick and green and grey and red all at the same time. Smoke pierced his eyes, his breath came short and ragged. He'd been running. No, not now, he was looking. His head felt detached to the rest of his body.
He saw Tifa first.
He wasn't sure what she was doing, at fist. She was kneeling, saying something so fast, and he was hearing, but not listening. The sound of fire and death filled his ears instead. Something sparked near where he stood. He flinched. The machines were melting, exploding. Mako was burning. It revolted him.
Then he saw Tifa's father.
He was lying in front of his daughter, hair disheveled in a bloody, burnt mess.
He looked peaceful, dead.
Cloud,
"Cloud!"
"Damn, man, get a hold of yourself!"
Cloud sprang up, not sure what had just happened. A memory had just flashed before his eyes. It wasn't like remembering, either; the intensity, the reality of the vision burned him to the bone. He shivered.
"You all right?" Tifa sounded worried.
Cloud looked at Tifa. For a second, he saw her younger self staring back at him; just a bit rounder and softer. She had worn brown that day.
He blinked. The illusion was gone. It was just Tifa, older and sharper.
" … Tifa," he said.
"Yes?"
Cloud thought about what he could tell her. That he'd seen her and her dead father, lying in that reactor five years ago? That he didn't know why – but he had forgotten about it, until now. Until right now, when everything came back so vividly.
How could he have forgotten?
"Nothing." He heard himself say. All the things he couldn't say – they froze and crusted in his heart. In the crack-lines. He got up quickly.
"You sure?" Tifa asked, touching his arm. Cloud nodded.
"Yeah, forget about it. Come on, let's hurry." He looked at Barret. Barret looked doubtful, but nodded and led the way.
Nothing else happened for the rest of the way. Cloud set the bomb. His hands shook a little, but the room didn't flash red like the last time. No voices, no flashbacks. I was probably just tired, he decided. Not having eaten anything didn't help either.
"Awright, this way!" Barret quickened his pace as he led them out. The reactor was silent except for the perpetual whirring of the machines and their hurried footsteps echoing off the emptiness. Almost eerily so.
It didn't last very long, though.
"What the hell?" Barret stopped short. The road straight ahead was suddenly blocked by a massive robot that hadn't been there before. A man was walking out of its shadows. Barret and Tifa stopped walking, unsure.
Cloud walked past Barret. He stopped just as the man came out into the green light.
"President Shinra?" Barret said that like a curse, behind Cloud's back. Cloud stared at the man for a moment. It had been a trap. That was why they hadn't encountered anyone.
The president rolled his eyes from side to side, examining them.
"Hmm, so you all must be that… what was it?"
"AVALANCHE! And don't ya forget it!" Barret growled dangerously. The president waved a dismissive hand, the fat jewels of his rings reflecting off the Mako lights. He turned to Cloud, ignoring Barret. His beady eyes narrowed as he scanned him.
"You… you're the one who quit SOLDIER and joined AVALANCHE. I knew you've been exposed to Mako, from the look in your eyes…" He gestured at the general direction of Cloud's eyes. A condescending scoff followed. "The media's going wild… The press… A child of Shinra turning against his father! I'll have none of that. Tell me, traitor, what's your name?"
"Cloud Strife." Cloud answered, because there was no reason not to. The president cocked his head, as if in deep thought.
"I'm thinking…"
"Don't hurt yourself." Barret snarled. The president ignored that too. He shook his head slowly.
"No, doesn't ring a bell. But I can hardly be expected to remember everyone's name in my empire, can I? Unless you become another Sephiroth." He laughed at his own joke.
Cloud took a step back, suddenly feeling too dizzy to stand up straight. He felt frustration, anger – at how inept he is. What the hell was wrong with him? These stupid flashbacks, these stupid fears, the headaches, hearing voices, hallucinating – now, it seemed, it couldn't even hear Sephiroth's name without having a panic attack. Sephiroth. He felt sick. The world revolved around him, placing cold hands on his throat. He took another step back.
Barret ran past Cloud to grab the president, but had to stop when the president quickly stepped behind the giant robot and it started to whirr louder. Its huge metal clamps snapped shut with a deathly crack.
"If you will excuse me," the president said, smirking as he already began walking back the way he came. Cloud saw there was a helicopter waiting. "I have a dinner I must attend. I just wanted to see your faces one last time."
"Dinner? Don't gimme that! I ain't even started with you yet!" Barret shouted, but the helicopter had already floated into the air. As if in a daze, Cloud stared up at it, not knowing what to think.
"Barret…" Tifa said, pulling his sleeve. Barret followed her gaze. The robot the President Shinra had left was whirring ominously.
"What the," Barret said, and Cloud suddenly came to his senses.
"Get down!" He yelled as he threw his body down. Gunshots shook the stale air. He squinted open his eyes. The robot was slashing the air, guns firing from its chest. Its head, so to speak, started rotating to find its targets. It wouldn't be long until it lowered its gaze and locked down again. There would be nothing to do then.
Cloud grabbed his sword and shot forward. As he jumped, the robot locked upon him and the guns began to adjust themselves, pointing at him, but he was a half second faster. His sword smashed its head and slashed down right through half of its body, breaking through the core. He used the momentum to jump to the other side of the robot as it exploded behind him. One moment, he was stumbling and rolling on the bridge. The next, he heard the explosion and it paralyzed him for a second. A second too late. He saw the horizon rise up in front of his eyes. The floor he was standing on was falling. He was falling –
He clutched the broken edge of the bridge at the last moment. There wasn't enough of it, though. He breathed in and out, his heart feeling like it was still falling without him. Small pieces of burned metal rolled past and over him. Some of them left small red marks and scratches on his arm.
"Cloud!" Tifa was behind him, he could hear her voice. Hopefully standing on the other side of the gaping hole left by the explosion.
"Tifa! You okay?" Cloud called. He wished he could turn around and check. His arm was shaking.
"Yeah, we're okay… Hang on, Cloud! Barret, can't you do something?"
"Not a damn thing." Barret grumbled.
Blood was drying out of his hand. Cloud watched it turn ghostly white. He was going to fall.
"Hey, you gonna be awright?" Barret called behind him. There was a forced casualness behind his voice. Cloud decided to play along. His hand was slipping, muscles straining and feeling like they were going to tear apart.
"Yeah," he said, willing his voice to sound nonchalant. "You worry about yourselves. I'll just – you take care of Tifa."
"Yeah, of course, alright." A short pause, then, "…sorry 'bout all this."
Cloud would have laughed if he could. "I'll see you later."
But there was no later. He couldn't hold on any longer. He stared down at his other arm, hanging limply by his side.
"Alright, then, later." Barret's voice sounded distant, like everything else around him.
Cloud closed his eyes, and let go. Gravity took over him as he fell. It felt slow, not like the last time; he would have looked for that face again, if his eyes didn't hurt too much to open. He thought he heard Tifa call his name, but couldn't be sure. He was falling.
Sometime in between painful breaths, he felt himself falling unconscious.
He briefly wondered if he would ever wake up.
Then, black.