I am so, so sorry. I have been so, so, so, so, so bad with updating lately- if you want to know why it's on the top of my profile. And there was something else… I forgot! Oh yeah- Not to have any of my stories reported and removed I have removed all the songlyrics not written by me in the stories… amongst others a few used in this… so some parts might seem weird now… if you still see any songlyrics you recognize please let me know and if you see any poems they will most likely be written by myself.

I have also made a polyvore- edit for Joel. Link on my profile if you want to check it out- please tell me what you think. I might do an edit for Jamie as well.

"Emmett!" I caught up with Emmett in the hallway. "I…" I took a moment to be able to take a few deep breaths to be able to breathe normally again. "Please Emmett can I please…. Please…. Please…" I didn't really know where all the begging came from. Because it really wasn't like me- but Emmett understood so he interrupted.

"What do you want?"

"Can I lend fifteen dollars?"

"And you're gonna pay back with who's money?" Shoot! Well… I guess I didn't have any money left after the Christmas shopping to actually pay back with- and my dad was still getting the money for me so well… I didn't have any money… at all! "Don't worry Jame!" Emmett pulled up his wallet of his pocket. "You can just have fifteen bucks." He reached me the money. "What do you need them for anyway?"

I thought for a moment, if I told any of the Cullen's Carlisle would know- and if Carlisle knew then there was no way he was going to let me do it. "It's a surprise" I said at last. "You go home now. I'll meet you at home there's something I have to do before I go home." I turned around and walked into the school again to walk towards the skating hall a while later so the Cullen's wouldn't see where I was going and figure out what I was doing.

I was more or less skipping more than walking through the hall when I felt someone grabbing my shirt and Leon Taylor who held me pressed up against the wall my feet at least a few decimeters above the floor. "Hey Dylan." He fizzled but didn't get any further until someone pulled him back, Leon let go, and I fell to the floor too fast to be able to catch myself.

"Get away Taylor." The Junior student Joel Carlyle said- he both had one of his hands in a splint and was about half the size of the muscular football player in front of him. "Get on someone your own size." Leon just grimaced back at Joel.

"And what are you going to do Joey boy? Run to mummy and tell them someone hurting's Dylan huh?" Joel crossed his arms, but didn't get any further until a door right by us was opened and students started filling the hallway, and Leon disappeared in the crowd.

"You okay?" Joel held out his good hand but I just hit it away.

"I didn't ask for your help."

Before I had the time to think about how wrong I had been for doing that to Joel I turned around and walked away. I just wanted to get to the skating hall, pay for what I needed and sign myself up to the list the staff there had- then go home and take a shower- for about three hours because Bruce had dipped me down the toilet that was.

I walked fast towards the skating risk, and coming inside I could hear the sound of the Hockey team having their practice. I didn't walk into the skating hall itself though but turned to the left right inside the door and walked up to the reception. "Excuse me sir." The man in the reception looked up when I came walking. "I've written myself up on the list to compete in the fourteen to eighteen years old group. I'd like to pay and do the rest." Without another word the man pulled out a paper and a pencil and handed to me.

"Name: Jamie Dylan." I mumbled to myself while spelling out the letters. "Gender: Girl, age: fifteen" I scrabbled down address and phone number and everything that was needed. "Song…" I thought for a while about which song to have my choreography to and at last scrabbled down Total eclipse of the heart by Bonnie Tyler before I handed the paper back and then walked over to the bus stop and barely had the time to sit down before I had to stand up and step into the bus.

When I came home I found a note on the table that they had gone out hunting again. Carlisle wasn't with them but still at work and he'd be home in a few hours. So I only grabbed a new set of clothes- since I wasn't going anywhere else today- big sweatpants and a big T- shirt- good thing Alice wasn't home like that cause I felt like just slouching in too big clothes and watch glee for the rest of the day- but if Alice was home she'd make me take on something prettier.

I grabbed a towel from the cupboard and shampoo and the rest of what I needed from my room before I stepped into the shower. I just wanted to get clean so I stepped in without bothering to get my clothes off and let the warm water pour over my head with the shower itself just hanging there so I wouldn't have to hold onto it- and not moving a muscle.

I wasn't so sure when it had started with the bullies being on me all the time. Maybe it was just my destiny that other people just wouldn't like me and show it in a way that would hurt me. But one thing I was sure of- and that was the fact that for some reason it was getting worse and worse. I didn't know why but- it was- and I did not like it.

After more than an hour in the shower I turned the water off, wrapped the big towel around me and sunk down to the floor. And there I stayed until I got so cold I started shivering. At last I pulled on the clothes I had brought, hung the towel for drying and brought the things into my room where I threw them at my bed and in the laundry basket and then took my laptop and walked out in the living room. I had been planning on put another DVD with glee in but was too lazy to stand up again so I just zapped to some documentary that seemed perfectly boring and turned the sound off and then started hanging out on the Internet.

I ended up with putting on a song I liked- you can't stop the beat from Hairspray and put it on replay and then just laid there staring up in the ceiling and thinking. Listened to the lyrics of the song and remembered- during some of the worst days living with my parents- with my dad this song would have been what kept me going. The thought of whatever my dad did he couldn't take away from me what I loved the most. And no matter how hard he tried to make me something else I would always be me.

Every time dad and his friends had done what they wanted to me I could think about the lyrics of this song and a few others and I was always reminded that no matter what they did I would stand up again, Get on my feet because there was no way I was letting them stop the beat of my heart, stop the beat of my music.

He couldn't stop the beat of my happiness, couldn't stop the beat of what I loved the most and less than anything else he couldn't stop the beat of my life.

I almost fell asleep where I half sat half laid in the sofa and would have fallen asleep if I hadn't heard the door upstairs open and close and then heard Carlisle coming down the stairs. "Hello Jamie." He greeted me and clapped my shoulder with his freezing cold hand. "You had a good day at school?" I hesitated- I had been dipped down the toilet, then dropped onto the floor, and acted like a jerk to the only one that had tried to help. But I decided on not letting him know.

"Yeah. I had a good day." I could see that Carlisle didn't believe me. But before he could say anything else I took my laptop and walked into my room and sat down by my desk with my homework. "I'm doing my homework" I said when there was a knock on the door.

"Jamie?" Carlisle opened the door and came in. I turned my head and glared at him, hoping that it would make him go away. It didn't, he only came over and sat down by me on the bed. "Is everything alright in school? Is anyone being mean to you or something like that?" I sighed and shook my head.

"No Carlisle." I said, trying to make my lie seem like it was the truth. "Everything's fine." Carlisle frowned. And I was pretty sure he didn't believe me. "Can you leave now? I really need to do this homework." He nodded and left my room, I looked down at my book again. I closed them and sighed, I couldn't concentrate anymore. Carlisle seemed to have heard me close them because he came into the room again.

"Jamie… you know there are meds for ADHD right? Have you ever tried some?" I looked back at him, then turned around and crossed my legs in front of me, still looking at him with eyes that said something. "What are you thinking?"

"Do you know how much talking it took to make my dad go to the pharmacy and get asthma meds for me-and those are the ones that would in a worst case scenario save my life. I never even got him to buy allergy meds in the spring- so how do you think I would have gotten him to buy some meds that would only make me keep still more and concentrate better?" Carlisle let hear a soft chuckle- even though it wasn't actually funny.

"I could prescribe some for you if you'd like to try them so… what do you say?" I hesitated- I had always been so sure I would never get to try anything starting with "rit" and ending with "alin" I had never really been thinking about if I wanted to try it or not. I shrugged and then pulled out yet another book from my backpack.

"I guess I could give it a try. Can I just do my homework now?" Carlisle, ruffled my hair while he stood up to walk out of the room and close the door after him. I sighed and turned back to my schoolbook with the thoughts spinning in my head. Should I maybe have told Carlisle what was going on with Kiana and her gang? Told him how one of the senior's dipped me down the toilet? Maybe I should have because I was pretty sure that with his vampire senses could still feel me smelling like a dunghill despite my long shower.

He knew. He probably- most likely knew. But I knew for sure that he wasn't going to do anything unless I- or some of the others had told him what was going on. And I wasn't so sure I wanted him to do anything- that might just be making it all worse instead of his intentions to make it better. And if there was one thing I didn't need there was something that would make it even worse in the blink of an eye.

That night I half laid in the sofa watching some bad soap. Carlisle sat in his office doing some work or whatever and the rest of the Cullen's were still out hunting. At last I got tired of the docusoap and stood up, without really knowing where I was going I walked out in the garage. I hadn't really been thinking anything about the motorbike Emmett had given me since the day I got it- there had been too much to think about. But now I walked upstairs, out to the garage, and sat down on the bench that stood behind all the cars and stuff, right by me stood the motorbike.

I ran my hand over the motorbike- it had probably been red in some other decade, but now it was more of a white- red- pink color I didn't even know what to call it. And the bike had definitely seen its better days because even I- who didn't know anything about either motorbikes or any other vehicle- could see that if this would ever start again we could probably start looking for flying pigs.

But I loved it! I loved this bike because as soon as I could drive it I would have a freedom and a way to get myself around that I had never had before. And on top of it all- it was mine! Without knowing what else to do when I realized the whole motorbike was wearing a thick layer of dust I stood up and walked over to the sink in the garage, grabbed a bowl and a cloth and then sat down again and carefully started washing it.

"Jamie?" what to me felt like just a little while later Carlisle came into the garage as I sat and carefully wiped of the motorbike for at least the tenth time- even though it still felt like the first. "It's almost midnight. You need to come in now and get some sleep." I sighed, but knew he was right so I poured the water out in the sink, hung the cloth to dry on the crane and then walked inside with him. Not realizing how tired I was until I stumbled towards my bed to fall into it and not even having the time to pull the covers over me before I fell asleep.

That night I dreamed something I'd never been dreaming before. I ran through an endless corridor with doors both to my left and to my right. I knew that in one of the rooms Carlisle and the rest of the Cullen's would be in one of the rooms. I knew that I needed to find them I just didn't know which room they were in, so I kept on running from one door to another opening them one after one. And it always showed that people that didn't like me were in there, one of the bullies, my dad, even my dad's friends. But I had to keep looking… I had to find the Cullen's because there was no one else that could help me.

When I woke up my eyes shot open and I was breathing heavily. And when I saw someone- I couldn't see who it was- standing by my bed I flinched and pulled away. "It's okay, it's okay." I recognized Carlisle's voice and reached out my hand and turned the lamp on and peered with my eyes when the light filled the room to see Carlisle standing there holding a glass of water towards me. "Are you okay?" His voice was low and serious when I reached forward to take the glass.

"I'm fine." I mumbled and went through the dream again in my head. "It was just a dream." I put the second part on because I knew that there was no way he had missed it. Carlisle sighed and sat down on the bed, pointing to the glass and telling me to drink because I still hadn't touched the actual water. But still I didn't and just kept sitting there with the glass in front of me.

"Are you sure everything is alright Jamie?" He asked. Seriously- how many times would I have to answer this question? And why did he keep on asking if he wasn't going to believe my answer anyway? Screw that anyway, I wasn't going to tell him about everything that was going. "Drink." He pointed to the glass in my hand again. "It will do good for you."

I took a sip from the water and I had to admit it felt quite good with how dry my mouth was after breathing heavily with my mouth open. "Jamie." The low tone in Carlisle's voice told me exactly how serious he was being. "If something is not good at school would you tell me?"

Shoot…. And a bunch of swearing words.

"Yes Carlisle. Of course I would."

Naw, poor Jamie. So now you finally know why the story is called You can't stop the beat.

I'd like to ask you something because people have been nagging me since I first mentioned Addy that they couldn't wait to know what it was. But a few chapters when it finally came out that it was Dyslexia and ADHD. So what are your thoughts about that?

And if you want to know why I gave Jamie disabilities- it was because Jamie somehow reminded me of me, but I couldn't think of why so then I thought- well… I'll give her ADHD and Asperger's then there will be something… but she didn't seem… Aspergian… so I put Dyslexia there instead because it seemed more like her… so well… That's kind of it. And if someone didn't catch that I have got Asperger's and ADHD… why did I put that note there? Well… it's almost eleven PM and I start writing random notes when I'm tired. So I should probably stop now.