Some days are bad, really bad. I'll sit on the couch and do nothing all day, flipping channels. Or lying on the bed- not ours, a new one -and staring at the wall. I can't evade the demons forever. Every once in a while they catch up with me.
Other days are better, much better. I'll go over to Sam and Jessica's and we'll take Abby out for a day at the park. I'll cook., and do laundry. I'll work at the shop with Bobby. I'll think of you, and how you'd want me to try and be happy.
But no matter what my mood, Cas, I write you letters. Almost every day. There's two full boxes of them now. One day, we'll read them together.