Hey, thank you everyone for all the comments. I had never imagined all the positive feedback. I really lost my way with this story but I finally figured to keep going. So thank you, keep the reviews coming and ill keep the chapters coming. I felt like I could really keep this story going. College got in the way so i am sorry it took me a year for this.

"What the hell was that?" Gale is furious as we are finally shuffled onto the train into privacy. The train car is warm and dim with the only light provided from the fire flickering with orange and red and slightly blue. The shadows cause Gales face to look darker and more upset then he might actually be. But the blue of his eyes now looked completely black, his bulging muscles tense as he clenched his fists, his knuckles turning white.

"Why would you pick me? You know that have my family to take care of, and how much I hate the capital. Tell me, why would you go pull some stupid stunt like this?" His voice was calm and steady which only makes it harder to filter out the anger that lives underneath his words. I almost wish he was screaming. It would make it easier to take. I can't bring myself to say anything. If he wanted to swing at me and try and break my jaw, I would understand.

"It was me." Her voice is like a melody, soothing the savage beast inside of him. Katniss puts herself between us and in that instant his anger ebbs. He can't be mad at her, no matter what the reason, that much I can see in his face. He's more hurt than anything. How could she do something so unthinkably cruel to him?

"I needed you." She is steady as a rock but her words are begging for forgiveness. "There's no way I could do this without you. I knew my mom would help your family. I could never do it without people thinking there's something going on between us so Peeta agreed to do it for me." Those words sting at his heart and his walls of anger are now crumbling. "Please say something."

"I get it." He whispers, as if his throat is closing up from holding back the acid he wants to spit into every word. "I need a nap. Just wake me up when we get back to district 12." He storms out of the car leaving us in silence and leaving me feeling like he taking every piece of me with him. I feel shaken, like the earth is cracking beneath my feet. I already knew that Gale would never feel the same about me the way I felt about him. But to have him so angry, to detest me to the point where his hates me makes me wonder if at any minute I will shatter into so many pieces I won't be able to be put back together again.

Katniss leaves and again I'm alone. I do the only thing I can to distract myself, paint. The brush becomes a part of me, a different color for every emotion that is coursing through me. Everything feels so dark, empty, and meaningless. The black takes over control of the painting. I lose myself, like being put into a trance. When I break free my painting tells it all. A boy standing in the middle of emptiness, alone, his head bowed down looking at the ground as his blonde hair flows over to cover his face. Trees stripped of leaves and the earth a barren patch of dirt at his feet. As much as he wants to move, the boy is trapped in place.

As soon as the first tears rolls down my cheek there's not stopping the rest from following after. My eyes become so blurred I can barely make my way to the bed. As soon as my body hits the soft mattress I can't help but to shove my face into pillow to muffle the crying escaping from my throat. Everything I've been holding back, blocking like a dam, for so long is finally breaking free from the flood gates and now there's no stopping it. The tears sting my eyes as they leave and splatter softly on the sheets. Before long my tears have dried up and I have giving in to the creeping exhaustion. The bed is so soft I can't fight it.

XXXXXX

My heart is pounding in my ears, beating the drums of war. My blood is pumping so hard I feel as if my head might explode, my lungs are burning from running but I can't stop. Stopping will mean death. I know where I am. I'm where my nightmares always bring me; I'm back in the arena. I've been running for so long but there's no way I can stop. He's after me. My leg is burning as the blood gushes from the deep cut. The pain is so intense I feel as if I'm going to pass out. But my body keeps pushing. Every second counts. I can hear him hot on my trail. As long as Katniss is safe that's all that matters. I don't care what happens to me as long as she got away. Those tracker jackers had put her in a haze; I could only hope she made it away with her life.

My foot snags a tree root and I hit the ground, knocking what little wind that was left in me, out. For a second I'm disoriented, a little rattled by the fall. Before I could get running again he has me in his clutches. He picks me up and slams me against a nearby boulder. His eyes are burning with rage. His strong thick hand in around my throat crushing my windpipe and keeping the air from entering my lungs. Cato caught me.

"That was really stupid to do man. We had her right where we wanted and you messed it up. You just had to give her a chance." I know at this point that I'm a goner. He has me in his grip but for some reason he hasn't finished the job. He has a devilish look in his eyes and my heart pounds faster as my lungs are dying for a breath. His grip loosens around my throat but before I have a chance to fight his large fist collides with my temple and I'm knocked into a disoriented state of mind. Hard, rock-like fist hit my stomach, face and chest. My mouth taste like metal as it fills with blood. I spit it out on the ground and suck in a large gasp.

"Where's that strength now huh?" A swift kick meets my ribs and I hear a stomach churning crack. I'm doubled over in pain, unable to do anything. I bet the people at the capital are loving this one, a real show, something slow and painful. His massive hand takes my head and slams it into the rock. My ears being ringing, pain shoots through every nerve in my body and I can't do anything about it. I'm trapped like a rat, going to be dismembered piece by piece.

But he still hasn't killed me. Now he just bends down, face to face with me. His smile is sick and twisted and I know that the torture isn't even close to being over. "Now the real games being."

XXXXXX

I shoot up from my bed, every muscle in my body it tight and aching from the nightmare. Sweat coats my body as it drips down from my hair. Reliving the terrors of the arena makes me sick and I rush to the bathroom as the acid makes it way from my stomach and into the toilet. The pain is all too real. Thought the physical scars have healed, I will never stop having those nightmares and all I wish is for Gale to be there with me, holding me and telling me everything will be alright. Telling me he's going to protect me and will never let anything hurt me again. But I am left alone having to fight my own memory. Of all the dreams this one is the most vivid and haunting. Constantly reminding me of the horrors I had to endure but will never truly escape.

There's a knock at my door that shocks me from my thoughts. I quickly clean myself up, splashing water on my face, before I answer. Prim is standing on the other side. She looks at me with wondering eyes, and I'm not sure if she can tell if something is wrong with me.

"Hello Prim," I say, trying to calm my nerves.

"Hello Peeta. I just wanted to see if you were coming to dinner?" The last thing I was thinking about at this point was food but the thought made his stomach rubble with hunger. He hadn't eaten in hours.

"Thanks. Yeah ill meet you there." Prim gave me a kind angelic smile before she trotted off down the hall. Quickly I returned to the bathroom and turned on the shower. The steam rising from the basin began to fog up the mirrors. The heated water seemed to ease the ache in my bones and muscles. Water this hot is a luxury rarely afforded in District 12, I revel in it. The towels are softer than any material I could ever dream of. The cloths in the dresser were all cleaned, free of stains, and were all different kinds of fabrics, some I'd never even knew existed.

When I went to the dining car, everyone seemed in good spirits. Haymitch and Effie seem to be laughing, and for once, not at each other's throats. Katniss and Prim, both with large smiles on their faces, picked at the food on their plates. Gale sat there, no smile, his face hard as stone. When he sees me his eyes bore into me. Everyone seemed to notice the tension that had just arisen and fallen quite. I took the open seat but didn't take my eyes away from his.

Haymitch was the first to break the silence with an 'it's about time,' comment before he filled his glass with the white liquor. Effie cleared her throat and smiled. "Well it's so good for you to finally join us. We have a lot talk about. Now when we reach The Capital we have a photo shoot in the morning, we want to see the tributes with their choices." The words seemed remind everyone of the hostility in the air. She contented on, not noticing anything. "So you must be up early to meet with the prep teams. After that you meet with Caesar Flickerman for an interview. Finally, at night we have a very large banquet. Everyone who's anyone will be there and dying to meet you."

Poor choice of words on her part but once again, they went unnoticed. "Then we start our journey. Oh, I'm so excited. Traveling this great land, seeing so many different people and showing them that, even if you're from District 12, you can rise up and become great." Gale's frustrations had finally reached its boiling point. He stabbed his knife down into the wood of the table and pushed his chair back to stand.

"That is mahogany!" Effie shrieked as she pulled the knife from the table.

"I can't believe all of you. Just going along with this whole plan with fake smiles painted on your faces, celebrating something barbaric. Congratulations, you're all a bunch of puppets in the government's hands. But I won't be a part of it, I'd rather be dead." He stormed off. A part of me wanted to run after him but I knew it was best just to leave it alone. He already had a hatred for that me that runs deep as a wound. Katniss volunteered to go talk to him. I wanted to eat something but my stomach was tied into knots so badly I had lost any resemblance of an appetite.

XXXXX

The next morning we're prodded out of bed early to meet with our styling teams. Because I picked Gale as my companion for the tour, he was with my team. Today he didn't have that angry scowl on his face anymore. He looked more at ease, more like I usually see. The stylist commented on how handsome he was as they trimmed his hair, cleaned us up, and polished out any imperfections on either of us.

They dressed me in a black suit, white shirt and black tie. They said it would extenuate my blue eyes and make me look more grown up. They shoved me out into the photo shoot to wait while Haymitch and Effie made stood on the sidelines making sure everything went according to plan. When Gale walked out he was wearing a similar black suit but with a grey tie that made his eyes gleam. I had never seen him look more handsome. Usually he was covered in grass stains from hunting in the forest or coal dust that was everywhere in District 12. Now he was clean, his tan olive skin almost shining. My heart raced as he stepped next to me with the most handsome smile, I could have died happy just looking at him.

They made us pose in many different ways; back to back, side by side, but my personal favorite was when they made us put one arm around each other's shoulders like we were best friends. Just the touch of his hand made my heart almost break out of my ribs. Being so close to him I could smell the cologne they sprayed him with. It was a deep musky scent laced with something that smelled of the forest.

"Alright now face to face." The photographer said. We turned our bodied into each other. He stood much taller than me; I came up to his chest. They asked him to bend down so we were eye to eye. We had never been so close. I had never been able to look into his eyes at such a close proximity. They were more beautiful than I could have ever imagined. My mouth became dry, I felt like my throat was a desert. It was like looking into the eyes of an angel. It seemed like we looked into each other eyes for what seemed like hours. I wanted nothing more than to just more a couple of inches in and place my lips on his, to feel the soft skin on mine. I wanted to be like a drop of water and get absorbed by him. But before I could do anything I would regret they told us we were done.

XXXXXX

"Well it's nice to see you again Peeta," Caesar Flickerman shook my hand as I took the seat on stage for our interview with him. Caesar was decked out in his usual eccentric fashion; this time it was bright orange hair, lips and suit. "And a very warm welcome to you Gale." Gale sits next to me. I thought he would be tense at this point but he is still relaxed and playing it cool.

"So Peeta, what made you choose Gale as your accompaniment for the victory tour?" Of course the first question I get choked up. What do I say? That I've been in love with him since the first day I saw him or that Katniss wanted him here so I pretended that we were friends so she could be with him.

"I think," Gale interrupted, taking the presser off me, knowing I couldn't figure anything out to say. "The reasons that Peeta picked me was because we've known each other for a long time. We're almost like brothers at this point in our lives." He slapped me on the back, knock the breath of out me. Not because he hit me hard, but because his touch was like fire, burning through me and warming where he touched me.

The crowd of people cheered at his answer and I'm not sure it's because they liked it or because he's so handsome. Caesar laughed and clapped at the answer. "Well you're both very good looking boys. Is there any competition for the ladies of District 12?" Another question that made me sick to my stomach. I could feel the sweat being to form on the back of my neck and my palms. But Gale just answered as if he didn't even have to think.

"Not at all, we both have our own styles and our own taste." My heart began to race. Did he know? How could he? Maybe he was just saying it get to the next question. The crowd cheered again. Gale was so charismatic the people of The Capital were just eating up every word. He was a natural in front of the cameras. The interview just flew by and before I knew it Caesar shook our hands and prepared for Katniss and Prim.

XXXXX

We didn't speak at all for the rest of the day. We went back to the hotel room where we were staying and he just went to his room without another word. I didn't see him again until later that night when we were getting ready for the party. He came out of his room. He looked like he had been sleeping but still stunning. We didn't speak a word the entire way to the party. It was as if he was just gritting his teeth till this trip would be over. Katniss came down in a red dressed, similar to the one she wore for the interview for the games. Prim was in a pink dress, her hair down instead of in her pigtails.

We didn't have to go far. The party was filled with many different people; the prep teams were there, as well as many important people from the capital, and winners from Hunger Games past. There was more food spread out than I had ever seen before. Drinks were offered to us as soon as we entered and all eyes were on us. We had to be meet a million different people, all of who were congratulating us on winning and some who seemed to be flirting. I finally was able to eat something, calming my stomach and my nerves. As the night went on I felt that I needed to say something to him. For the most part, he just stood, staring out the window, holding a drink in his hand, and saying no to the people who kept trying to pull him into a dance.

"Hey," I said as I approached him. He looked at me then looked back out the window. My voice was shaky but I kept talking. "You did really well today. You really saved me during that interview."

"It was nothing." He said his voice soft and sexy. I felt like my legs were going to turn into jelly and I was going to fall.

"No, it was something. You really did save me. I would have choked up out there. The crowd really loved you." He didn't respond anymore. I tried, I got that off my chest, and I did what I had to do. I start to walk away when he called me back.

"For what it's worth… I'm sorry for how I acted the other day. Katniss sat me down and explained everything and it wasn't right of me to get angry at you." I felt my heart swell in my chest. He didn't completely hate me. "I just was so angry for the games and this reminded me of everything." He ran his free hand through his hair trying to think of a way to apologize. But even just the slightest sorry was more than enough. "I hope I didn't hurt you."

"I'm resilient." I try to joke. He flashes a bit of a smile. I swoon over it.

"Hey, I'm going to find Katniss. I'll talk to you later." He pats me on the back and I have to steady myself from falling over from the shock. I watch him walk away until he disappears into the crowd.

"He sure is good looking," Haymitch's drunk and grumbled voice rings in my ear as he stands next to me. I'm in shock, no idea what to say. Maybe I heard his wrong; maybe he's just teasing me. "A boy like that doesn't stay single forever."

I definitely didn't hear that one wrong. He puts his arm around my shoulder, the other hand clenching a glass of liquor. He's drunk. But Haymitch usually is so this is nothing of a surprise. But still, why is he saying this to me? Does he know? I start to panic. I do the only thing I can think of. I laugh.

"Haha yeah, whoever gets him is a lucky girl." He looks at me cockeyed. He knows I'm covering up something. And I'm not very good at it. So I guess the jig is up. I drop the act. "How did you know?"

He takes a long sip of his drink. "Plain and simple, you stare at him the way I stare at a nice large bottle of liquor. Longingly, with passion, like something you know you could never live without. No one looks at somebody like that unless their heart is filled with them." I clench my fist. If I was so obvious that Haymitch noticed, Gale must really know, which would explain why he doesn't want to talk to me and avoids me at every cost. I could hardly hold myself together. I can feel my eyes begin to sting as they fill with tears. He pulls me to the bathroom; he knows I don't want to be seen like this, breaking down at the middle of a social event.

He tosses me a towel to dry my eyes. "I don't know what to do." I say wiping my eyes clear.

He shrugs. "Well there's only one thing you can do. And I know you don't want to hear it but all you really can do is tell him how you feel."

He's right; I didn't want to hear that. I sigh. "What's the point; he could have any girl he wanted. Not only that, but he's in love with Katniss. I would never stand a chance. If I ever said anything it would just make everything weird, not only between him and I but with Katniss too."

Haymitch finishes what's left in his glass. "First of all, she doesn't look at him the way you do. She gives him the look of a friend or brother. You look at him as if the world ended tomorrow, he would be the one to save it. Now I've lived a life full of regret, and I'm telling you, the only thing you can do is let it out, don't hold it inside. What's the worst that could happen?

"He'd hate me."

He nodded. "What the worst that could happen if you don't?" He turns and leaves me. He knows he struck a nerve.

hopefully the next one wont take me a year LOL. Please review and tell me what you think. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I do.