Chapter 6
Felix looked at his watch. It was half-passed seven. Nervous, he looked back to the door. Nothing. Alison was late, again. He knew she had been going through a lot, but it wasn't like her to miss important events. This wasn't just some small-time preparation get-together, this was the rehearsal.
In the front of the room stood Delphine, wearing a black skirt and a white blouse over a black bra. Her blond hair had been thrown effortlessly to one side and she was laughing. Felix smiled. He never would admit it aloud, but he had grown fond of Delphine over the years. He'd grown to enjoy her bold, act-before-thinking attitude, her unwavering loyalty, and the way she could pull off outfits other women couldn't. Across from her, in front of the arch, was little Monkey. Cosima had tied ribbons in Kira's hair to mock-dreads and put her in a little white dress. Tears of laughter fell from Cosima's eyes as she watched Delphine rehearsing the wedding festivities with Kira in Cosima's place. Felix found the whole charade to be ridiculous.
"Stop, hold on," Cosima said, placing her glasses on Kira, "there, that's it. I just want this to feel as authentic as possible, Delphine."
All in attendance were laughing at the farce. Delphine was bright red with laughter and could barely get through the shortened vows.
Felix looked at his nails. They had grime in them. Not the old-paint kind of grime he wore as a badge of honor, but real, actual dirt. He brushed off his pants and throwing an arm on the chair next to him, flipped his hair.
Donnie turned around nervously. Felix shot him a sympathetic look. This wasn't going to go over well. There was only so much Felix could do for Alison.
"You're on your own girl," he whispered to himself.
"Delphine," Kira said at the front of the room, "We're gonna get married and kiss and have babies and stuff. I promise to be a good science-wife and if you wash my dreads I'll wash your feet." The room exploded in more laughter. Delphine wiped a tear from her face.
"Oh, Cosima," Delphine said, "I don't know how you're going to top this one. She is a very good bride."
Cosima shrugged. "I don't know either," She said, "guess you'll just have to marry her."
"What do you say?" Delphine asked Kira.
"Uhh," Kira stuttered, "I think Auntie Cosima would kill me."
Cosima burst out laughing. "That I would, little Monkey, that I would."
Delphine shot Cosima a wink. They did look adorable together, but the whole monogamy of it all made Felix queasy.
The door burst open.
Everyone turned around to see Alison. "Oh," Alison said, "sorry, I..I.."
Felix motioned Alison over. She slipped into the seat next to him. Cosima flashed a sympathetic smile. Delphine looked slightly annoyed.
"Where were we?" Cosima said. Kira and Delphine made a show of exchanging rings. Kira seemed quite impressed with her ring-pop.
"Where have you been?" Felix whispered to Alison.
"Don't worry about it." Alison said.
"I kind of need to, sweetie," Felix said, "you're never late, and all of a sudden you're never on time."
"Let's focus on the rehearsal." Alison said curtly.
"Alison, people are talking." Felix whispered. "have you been drinking?"
"Felix!" Alison cut back in a hushed yell. Cal and Sarah turned around. Alison brushed them off with a smile. Felix rolled his eyes.
"I'm just saying, Alison, you keep disappearing," Felix said, "either you're drinking or you're getting high and worst of all, you're not inviting me and I'm hurt."
"Oh, Felix," Alison whispered, "it isn't that. I just have had horrible migraines"
Felix sat quietly. He worried about Alison, and he saw right through her lie. Alison wasn't in her room, Donnie never could find her, and Felix hadn't been able to find her anywhere. She was disappearing somewhere and it had nothing to do with a migraine. Felix hoped she wasn't off crying. He knew she needed time, but it wasn't like Alison to handle pain alone. Felix hated to admit it, but he was kind of hurt that she hadn't come to him. He flipped her ponytail with his hand absently.
"Stop." Alison said.
"Alison," Felix whined, "don't be a hard-ass."
"I'm not being a hard-butt," Alison corrected, "I just need some time to myself is all."
"I understand," Felix lied, "But do try to be fashionably late next time instead of late-late."
The rehearsal continued, and afterwards everyone gathered for dinner. No matter how much Felix tried to pry, Alison was zipped tight. He spent the latter half of dinner pouting. He knew he was being dramatic, but something was definitely going on, and frankly he wasn't used to being ignored by Alison. He was glad to learn he wasn't the only one. Alison seemed to zone-out most of the meal, paying little attention to anyone, least-of-all Donnie. Felix wondered if they had gotten in a fight. Perhaps Donnie unknowingly said something that reminded Alison of Beth. It would explain why she didn't want to be around him. Donnie really couldn't stop himself from being stupid.
As the dinner came to a close Felix tried to corner Alison again, but she quickly excused herself to her room. Fine, if Alison was going to be a little brat, he was going to find his own fun. Felix eyed the cute waiter from the other night cleaning a table.
Alison was glad when she got out of her obligations. Her heart picked up as she rushed back to her room. She had convinced Donnie to stay and bore Cal with stories of his job. It was already almost ten-thirty and Alison didn't want to be late to Beth and her date.
She slipped on a teal button-up blouse and turned to see her profile in the mirror. Alison brushed the front of her blouse out and looking around her, despite the room being empty, pushed her boobs up some more. She blushed at the thought of being concerned how her chest looked. She couldn't remember the last time she cared about that with Donnie. Alison took out a modest pencil skirt, ending just below the knee, and tried it on.
"This won't do." Alison said to her self.
Ditching the skirt, she slipped into a tight pair of black slacks.
"Hello, my name is Alison, I'll be your realtor for the evening." Alison said, disgusted.
She ripped the blouse off, but not before getting her head stuck and tripping. She fell onto the bed and yanked it off throwing the blouse across the room in frustration. Sitting on the bed, she felt deflated.
Utilitarian, yet fashionable, she thought to herself. She quickly pulled a tight baby-blue scoop-neck shirt from her bag and slipped it on. She grabbed a tight pair of jeans. Then, raiding her wedding attire, she took the decorative white belt from her dress and slipped it in the belt loops of the jeans. Contemplating a final piece, she slipped on her pearls and her nicest flats she brought. She thought about raising the bar with heels, but figured that they weren't appropriate for a pond-side date.
Satisfied, she sprayed a mist of perfume on her wrist and admired herself in front of the mirror.
Alison snuck out the door, making sure no one would surprise her. Then, she slipped out the closer front door to the resort before turning and working her way around the building from the outside. Rounding the side, she followed the familiar path into the flower garden. She picked a White Trillium, knowing full well it wasn't allowed, and held it close to her chest. As she cleared the garden, she continued along the path into the darkness. Beautiful aspens lined the walkway, blocking out most of the large moon. Alison hadn't brought a light so she had to walk the rest of the way blind and cautious. Finally, after about five minutes of walking she reached the clearing. The moon shone beautifully, adding a light blue hue to the pond.
Alison stopped upon seeing the water. It was the first time in five years she had been back to this place. The gravity of this location, this moment, weighed down on her. Suddenly, Alison became very aware of her surroundings. An owl hooted in the distance and a cold breeze blew across the pond meeting Alison. She stood; arms wrapped around herself, remembering the warmer afternoon from the last time she was here.
"Are you going to sit down, or just stand there all day?" Beth said from the ground, hand blocking the sun from her eyes.
"I was just enjoying the view," Alison said, "plus, these pants are new."
Beth laughed, "I'll buy you some new ones, sit down."
The afternoon sun was warm on their skin. It was an unusually warm day for early October. Not quite hot, but warm enough to negate a jacket.
Alison gave in to Beth and sat down next to her. They had spent a delightful weekend together, away from the kids, away from Donnie, away from all the stresses. Beth insisted on spending the afternoon by the lake before leaving. Alison obliged, not wishing the weekend to end.
Beth looked out across the pond. A family of ducks swam on the far side. The color-tinged leaves of the trees floated from the limbs and landed upon the pond's placid surface. Beth looked contemplative.
"I like this," Beth said suddenly, "I like just sitting here."
"I could sit anywhere with you." Alison agreed.
"Oh don't get sappy on me, Ali." Beth laughed.
"No, Beth," Alison said, "seriously, look at me."
Beth turned to stare in Alison's eyes. The look almost stole the words that Alison had been sitting on.
"I'm looking," Beth said.
"I know," Alison replied, "I just wanted to say, I just…"
Beth changed expression, leaning in. "What's up? Is everything ok?"
Alison lost her nerve and looked down. "Nothing." She lied.
"Hey," Beth said pulling Alison's chin to look at her, "what's wrong? You can talk to me."
"I just don't want to leave yet," Alison said, "I don't know what I'll do when I get home. How can I face Donnie and pretend everything is fine?"
Beth exhaled. "You're not alone," Beth said, "I've got to figure out Paul. He's been acting strange to begin with. I just have a weird feeling with him. It's been nice to take some time away from him."
"It's been nice to take some time away with you." Alison said.
Beth turned and smiled. Then she leaned in and kissed Alison's lips. Alison lost all train of thought. Her hand rose to Beth's face. Holding her, Alison parted her lips, in an out-of-character act of ambition, and passed her tongue through Beth's lips. The act seemed to work as Beth pushed into her. Falling back onto the ground, Beth slid on top of Alison and kissed her deep. Beth slid her hand down Alison's side and slipped her thumb under Alison's waistband wrapping the side of her panties around the thumb. Alison responded by raising her thigh slowly between Beth's legs. The embrace pushed Beth to kiss in a downward arc as she placed a hand by Alison's head to balance herself.
Alison smiled, mid-kiss and rolled Beth over. However, as they rolled, Alison's hair got caught in Beth's mouth. The two of them started giggling, foreheads touching. Alison rolled off to the side. The two of them breathed heavily, calming down from their passionate kiss. Beth looked around checking to make sure they were still alone. Then she leaned over Alison to begin again.
"Beth." Alison whispered.
"Yeah 'burbs." Beth teased while hovering inches from Alison's face.
Alison looked straight into Beth's eyes, serious, determined. She softly licked her lips. Beth returned the look by biting the bottom of hers. The distance between them seemed to have a gravity of it's own, pulling them closer. Alison opened her mouth, Beth lightly touching her bottom lip with her own top lip.
Alison whispered in a quiet, almost inaudible volume. "I love you, Beth."
Beth leaned back to the side, resting her weight on one arm. She ran her freehand through her hair, pulling it out of her face. Alison sat frozen, frightened. The silence seemed never ending.
"Good." Beth said.
Alison's heart began to drop.
"Because I've been unsure how to tell you the last month how I feel, and here you go beating me to it." Beth said.
Alison smiled. "So.."
"I love you too, 'burbs" Beth said.
"Now why'd you have to go and ruin it?" Alison joked, pushing Beth back against the ground.
"I didn't ruin it," Beth protested with a mischievous smile, "I made it better."
Alison rolled her eyes. "I take it back, I take it all back."
Beth fell on her back laughing. Alison smiled looking at her, feeling a weight lifted.
Alison found the exact spot where they laid and sat down. Alone, she looked around. She tried to look at her watch under the moonlight but couldn't quite make out the time to know if she was early or Beth was late.
"I figured this is where you'd sit." Beth said as she walked up.
Alison looked up at her, the blue light cascading on her side, framing her face. Alison couldn't make out all of her features, but she knew how beautiful she was. Alison rose from her seat, brushing the dirt from her pants.
"Of all the memories that haunt me, it's this one I can't forget." Alison said. "It's this one I never want to forget."
Beth walked up close and greeted Alison with a kiss. "Good." Beth said.
Alison smiled back, slipping the White Trillium in Beth's hair. "How are you this evening?"
"I'm ok, I've missed you." Beth said.
"I have counted down the hours till tonight," Alison said, "though, things would be easier if you'd just let me know your room number."
"Now where's the fun in that?" Beth said, "If I'm not mysterious, you might lose interest."
Alison laughed. "You show up after five years and hook me right in. I think you've got my interest."
Beth turned and slipped an arm around Alison's waist. Alison laid her head on Beth's shoulder.
"When are you leaving?" Alison said suddenly.
"What," Beth asked, "where did that come from?"
"I know you have to, and tomorrow is my last day here. Are you leaving before me, or later?"
Beth kissed Alison's forehead. "I'm here as long as you're here."
"And then what?" Alison asked.
"And then," Beth thought, "And then I… I dunno, Ali."
"There is no way for you to stay?" Alison asked.
"You have no idea how much I wish there was."
Alison looked down, eyes watering. "I love you, Beth," she said to the ground.
"I know." Beth looked off towards the moon. Alison glimpsed up and saw Beth's eyes watering as well.
"You were my one love, Alison." Beth said. "You were and will always be the only thing that mattered, that has mattered in my life."
Alison kissed Beth on the cheek. "No matter what, we'll always have our pond." Alison said.
"If I could wrap this pond up and give it to you I would." Beth smiled.
Alison filled with hope. "Maybe we can meet again? Maybe I can sneak away, and you can sneak away. Maybe we can live our lives, day-to-day and meet here, once a year, once every two years. I can wait, and we can spend one weekend together, just like that one time. Maybe it can be our thing."
"Alison." Beth said.
"I know your work is important," Alison said, "but maybe, maybe we can make it work. This thing we have, Beth, it's a crazy once-in-a-lifetime love. We don't have to be one of those grow-old and die together couples, but maybe we can just have weekends, or something. Maybe we can just have one ounce of each other's lives. I promise you, Beth, all I'm asking for is the smallest sliver. Let me share one weekend every few years with you. It's all I ask, it's all I need."
Beth slipped her fingers into the front of Alison's belt and pulled her close. "Maybe," Beth whispered, "maybe it could work."
"You could send me riddles, weeks in advance." Alison continued, "You'd make them extremely difficult. I'd spend days at the library trying to understand them. And then I'd find out when, and what room and we'd meet here, and I'd have solved your detective's puzzle."
Beth tightened her grip on Alison's belt, slipping her fingertips into the front of Alison's pants as she pulled her inches away.
"You'd greet me, and we'd lay together, alone." Alison said, "We'd talk for hours the first night, not leaving the room. I'd tell you all that had happened in my life, and you'd tell me very cryptic hints at whatever you're working on."
"Uh-huh?" Beth encouraged, goofy smile across her face.
"Then we'd come out here, and make sure the place was completely empty." Alison continued.
"Oh yeah?" Beth said, tilting her head slowly towards Alison's lips.
"And we'd fuck." Alison said.
Beth fell back aghast. "We'd what?"
Alison giggled. "What? You think I don't know the words just because I refuse to say them?"
"No but I…" Beth trailed off.
"I can be crass too, Beth Childs." Alison suddenly grabbed the front of Beth's jeans and pulled her in for a long, deep, passionate kiss.
The two of them talked for hours, the moon slowly moving with the earth's rotation overhead. They began standing, before sitting down, and finally ending on their backs, gazing up at the stars. Their hands interlocked, for hours. By the time Alison began to drift off, it was deep into the night, just before the sun would rise. Beth leaned over and kissed Alison's forehead.
"Hey," Beth said, "It's time to go. You have a wedding to help with and it's way too late."
Alison mumbled some words followed by, "I don't want to go yet."
Beth smiled and kissed her forehead again. Then she stood, lifting Alison to her feet. The two of them walked back to the resort hand-in-hand. Alison felt full, felt satiated.
"I'm so glad I was able to come back." Beth said as they walked, "even an hour with you would have been worth it, but I feel like this entire weekend has been ours. It's more than I could have ever hoped for, Alison."
Alison smiled, "Me too, Beth, thank you."
Once they got to the garden and the light began to reveal their secrecy, Alison kissed Beth and wished her goodnight. As Alison parted, walking up the steps, she ran the entire evening through her head. It was perfect, every second. Alison had not felt this way, well, ever. What she just shared with Beth was a moment that they had never had before. Alison had known her heart was Beth's, but tonight, she learned it never could be anyone else's.
Alison remembered the look on Beth's face of sheer shock. She giggled as she unlocked the door. She was surprised to see a light on. She walked in to see Donnie sitting in a chair. He had dark bags under his eyes. His cheeks glistened of angry perspiration.
"Donnie." Alison said.
"We need to talk," Donnie responded, "now."