Hey, year three, chapter three haha. I'm very sorry guys, when I started this story I think I just started college and did it once I read the books. Now I just graduated so yeah, time flies. But I'm very intent on finishing it. Thank you for all the great reviews. Enjoy
The trees zipped by the windows of the train. We had left the party a few hours ago and now were headed for district one. We'd be spending about a few days in each district to learn about them. We all knew it was to show off to the families of the losers of the games. A way of keeping the people under control. I knew it all too well, but that's why Katniss and I are 'in love'. As long as the government thinks that we didn't play them for fools they wont come after us, or worse the ones we love. But there was only one person I truly loved. Now I have to be brave about it. Haymitch made it pretty clear that I shouldn't be such a chicken and just say something to him. But how can I? His rejection would mean the end of the world to me, as I know it. Gale couldn't ever love me. He loves Katniss.
I made my way out to the back of the train. There's a small platform outside that people can stand on to watch the world go by. As I exit the small car I see him standing there, still dressed in the suit and tie. His face and body are outlined in the shimmering pale moonlight. For a second I consider going back to my room and just hiding out till we arrive at district one. But before I can make a hasty exit he sees me.
Just one gaze from him makes it impossible for me to move, like the look from medusa. He looked at me and I turned to stone. I swallow my fears and move next to him. He's overlooking the rails. Neither of us says anything. After a few moments of awkward silence he finally speaks up.
"Look at that." He says pointing down to the tracks that are whizzing by. "Moving so fast you would never survive jumping." Not to mention the fact that everything around the tracks is jagged rocks that would most likely kill you more than anything.
"Why would you want to jump anyways?" I question back to him. He didn't move or change from looking at the passing tracks.
"'Sometimes I just think maybe it would be better if I just ended it. Show them that they don't control me, that I still own my life." His words are somber and filled with distain. He truly hates the government and the control. "I always asked Katniss to runaway with me. I know we could have made it on our own."
"Why didn't you?" I could listen to his voice all night. His face is hard and unchanging as stone. But as hard as it was it was even more handsome. I wanted to reach up and run my fingers through his hair and pull him closer, press his body against mine.
"We have our families to take care of. Then she volunteered for the games and met you." The last words seemed to have a little more bite then I thought they would. He really disliked me for being able to be the one to help Katniss.
My heart began to beat in my chest. I had to take the chance. If only so I could never regret it when I'm old and alone. "Look, Gale, there's something I need to tell you about me and Katniss." The crippling fear began to set in. My stomach felt like it was going to twist itself into knots. I took a deep breath and tried to gather my thoughts.
"The thing is, during the games Haymitch told us that if we played up the star-crossed lovers thing, people would fall for it and help us." Now I felt like I couldn't shut my mouth. Everything I had been holding back began to still out. "So we pretended we were in love, for the cameras. But now everything seemed to be out of control. We have to keep pretending or we'll probably end up dead."
It was like a weight was being lifted off my shoulders. I was Atlas and I no longer had to hold up the sky. Telling him the truth seemed to stir up a change in him. He started to look hopeful, like there was something to look forward to, like he'd just been told that the world wasn't ending.
"Why didn't anyone tell me before?"
I sighed. "I assume Katniss didn't say anything because Haymitch told us not to tell anyone. The less people knew the better. And I didn't say anything because… well, because you hate me." The words stung my throat as I said them. They seemed to make him wince at them as well.
"I did hate you." He admits. He finally looks up from the tracks and looks at me in the eyes. "I hated that you and Katniss were together, that you were the one who helped her, that you had won her heart. I had always thought her and I would end up together but I gave up on that a long time ago."
"So you don't have me?" I question. Maybe there was still some hope left inside. If I were him I'd hate me too. She was his best friend since they were little and I swooped in there and stole her love, well as far as he knew.
"No I don't. " he says with a slight smile and laugh. "Envy, maybe, but not hate."
My heart swelled full like a balloon filled with too much air. It felt like it was going to burst. I could hear Haymitch's words ringing in the back of my mind, coxing me to say something. To stand up and say something to him now or forever hold my peace.
"There's something else I need to tell you." Suddenly my mouth was bone dry and the palms were wet as a swamp. His stomach was tied in a bow and his heart pounded so hard it sounded like a choirs of drums. It was now or never. "When I did my first interview with Caesar, I wasn't lying when I said that there was someone back home that I was in love with." The word almost seemed to get stuck in my throat. It was like I was stung by tracker jackers and couldn't speak.
"It was you." I finally said it. After choking out the first few, the rest seemed to come easily. "It's always been you. I've loved you since I first saw you. The only thing that got me through the games was the thought of coming back to you." I step closer to him, putting my hand on his. He doesn't flinch away. "I can't get you out my head. I dream about you just holding me in your arms, protecting me. That's why I was ok with having you be my guest on this trip. I wanted you close to me."
One of his hands runs through my hair, down my cheek until his thumb rests on my lower lip. His skin was rough with years of hard work. The shock of his skin on mine flows through my body, lighting up every nerve with excitement.
"I don't know what to say." He whimpers. The shock of everything coming to light has seemed to force him off his axis. I run my hands along his shirt, feeling the hard bulge of muscles under it.
"You don't have to say anything." His bright grey eyes shine through the dark, looking into mine, gazing into my very soul. His other hand finds it way around my waist and pulls me closer to him. Our bodies are pressed together. For the first time since the games I finally feel safe. He's holding me close.
Without another thought I push myself on my toes and place my lips on his. The feeling is instantaneous, like some sweet drug flowing through my body. I feel like we have morphed into one single being. I feel lighter than air, like I'm walking in the clouds. The sound of the train has disappears, all I can hear is the sound of our hearts being in unison. His lips are soft, much softer than I had anticipated. He pulls me tighter, hugging our bodies firmly together. My hands begin to unbutton his shirt and feel the warm flesh and muscle hiding under the fabric. His skin burns like fire. I cant stop kissing him.
He pulls away from me; his from around me begin to redo the buttons on his shirt. "I'm sorry Peeta. I can't do this. This is too much for me." With that he turns away from me and heads back inside. I'm left standing there, sudden, gasping like a fish out of water. What just happened? He kissed me and then ran away as fast as he could, the words still rattling me to my core. I can't do this.
XXX
We arrive in Distract one at dawn. The sun is baring coming over the horizon and we're already being prepped for the day. At the breakfast table Effie is going over the schedule for the day; first we must meet with the mayor of district one, then we get to tour some of the shops before ending the day by meeting the other winners of district one and having a dinner.
Haymitch already looks like he has gotten into the liquor cabinet. Katniss and Prim look as if they had been run through their beauty regiment since the early hours of the night. I had been woken up an hour ago to get showered, dressed and prepped for the day. I haven't seen any sign of Gale since he ran out on me last night. I haven't been able to stop thinking about that kiss. It was one of the greatest feelings I'd ever felt. Like everything in the world didn't matter anymore.
The door to the dining car opened and there he was, looking as handsome as ever. He was dressed in a simple white cotton shirt and jeans. He looked casual but more handsome than I'd ever seen him. As he took his seat he didn't make eye contact with me. The sinking feeling in my chest made it feel like I had a boulder crushing the air out of me. The train came to a firm stop. Everyone began to shuffle out.
"Come now everyone," Effie said clutching her clipboard. "We have a big, big, big day ahead of us." As soon as Gale goes for the door I block him. It's just him and me now. I can tell he wanted noting more than to push past me and follow the others. But he doesn't. Instead he looks at me with those deep gray eyes and I almost melt right there.
"We need to talk about what happened." I say, making sure to stand my ground.
"No we really don't." he says back, ready to push me out of the way. I make it known I'm not going anywhere until we talked.
"Yes we do." I muster up everything inside me to find the courage. One part of me is scared to say anything but the other, the more dominant part, is telling me I need to. "You kissed me." I say. "You kissed me, and it was amazing. I know you felt it too. But then you ran out on me. I just want to know why?"
He's visibly annoyed with me. His fist balled at his side, a strong grimace on his face. "Look, whatever that was, its not going to happen again. It was a mistake." My heart sank, I felt physically ill. He had given me a taste of him but now was taking it away. I felt like my body was going to break apart into a million little pieces. I wanted to protest but before I could say anything Haymitch walked back in.
He took one look at us and cocked his eyebrow. "Am I interrupting something?"
"No, we were just leaving." Gale says as he pushes past me. Haymitch places a rough hand on my shoulder.
"Hang in there kid."
"I don't get it. We shared a wonderful kiss last night but then he won't even talk to me now."
Haymitch nods his head. He puts his arm around shoulders and walks with me off the train. "Look, kid, you have to understand. Something like this is totally new to him. But I will say, if he locked lips with you, then you've already won half the battle." Standing so close to him I can really tell just how much he's had to drink today.
"But what do I do? He wont talk to me." We walk along from the train station into district one. It's like a miniature version of the Capital. Large stone buildings line the street, all very high-end looking. We follow the street, and I can't believe my eyes. Most of the shops have items District 12 could only dream about; jewelry stores with bight gens gleaming in the early sunlight, perfume stores with clouds of sweet air pouring in the steers, Furrier with hides of animals that I had even seen before.
"What you need to do is show him that you're not going anywhere. That your feelings are here to stay."
"And how do I do that?"
"Now that," he says before taking a small sip of his drink, "that is up to you to learn. If you want him to know how you feel, show him." Haymitch may be a terrible drunk but as a mentor, he knows what he's talking about.
We catch up with the rest of the group. Effie is none to happy with our tardiness. It makes us look bad. We meet the mayor of the District before we are allowed to go about our day. He tells us to enjoy all the wonders the district has to offer. We are free to go anywhere we like, as long as we have a peacekeeper with us. Gale stuck to Katniss' side, leaving me in the dust.
"Don't worry kid, he'll come around. Time and love, the two things you have plenty of." Haymitch and Effie left together, most likely to oversee the dinner tonight to make sure nothing is going to go wrong. I was left alone.
XXX
Gold and diamonds, they seemed to line the streets. I was used to coal dust covering everything, not a nice clean sheen. The sun was shinning through the windows, making everything catch my eye. Show him. Haymitch said I needed to show him I wasn't going anywhere.
One of the shops stuck out to me. It was small, quant, and humble compared to every other one. I pushed the door open, to see glass cases filled with jewelry. The girl behind the counter greets me with a sweet smile. I look around at the elaborate jewels, all coated in bright, shining gems. All of them could easily be traded for a year's supply of food in district twelve.
"Do you have anything a little simpler?" She looks around behind the counter and brings out a few different rings. But the one that I see out of them is a simple one, just a gold band, nothing too fancy. It was perfect. What a better way to show how I feel. I pay the girl and leave.
XXX
Back on the train we're getting dressed for the dinner to meet the former champions of the games. Gale was in his room getting ready. The one question I have is how do I give this to him? There's no way he'll take it if I just give it to him. He's much too stubborn for that. I decide the best way is place it on the ground and knock.
I don't wait to see if he takes it, instead I head to the main car to wait for everyone. When he finally comes out, he casually stands there, hands tucked in his pockets, and looking so handsome I can barely take my eyes off him. He wouldn't even look at me.
We left for the dinner. It was being help in the capital building, a much smaller group than the one in the Capital, just a few of the past champions, the mayor, a few random people and us.
"Come come," Effie says pulling Katniss and me to meet everyone. "This is Gloss and Cashmere, the mentors of the two tributes from the games you were in." The two of them were both described as being classically beautiful. Both had blonde hair and looked were physically strong. They were polite and cool. The only one I would think is better looking than Gloss was Gale.
For dinner we sat next to our guest while the mayor made a speech about how nice it was having us there and how it was such an honor. Truthfully, I felt like a fish out of water. The only reason we was able to be there was because we had a hand in the death of their tributes. I looked to Gale who was sitting next to me. He wouldn't make eye contact.
Haymitch sat across from me, a glass of wine never leaving his hand. I looked to him with a face that screamed help me. He just raised his eyebrow in a way that told me I was on my own. I felt like the walls were closing in on me. "I need to get some air."
I ran out as fast as I could, filling my lung with the fresh air. Just being around him and not being able to talk to him made me almost sick. My body began to relax until I felt someone grab me and slam into a nearby wall. My head felt raddled until I realized it was Gloss who was holding on me.
"Let me ask you something, how did a little twerp like you outlive someone like Marvel or Glimmer." His breath smelled worse than Haymitch's. He was definitely toasted off of wine. "They were trained to squash little bugs like you." I wanted to fight back but he had me pinned.
"I didn't kill either of them." Katniss had but I wasn't about to release this gorilla on her. "It's just the games"
"Shut up." He hissed. "That girl... she was everything to me." His eyes almost seemed like they were beginning to fill up with water. "We had plans… she was going to come back and we could live our lives together. Now she's in a grave because of you and your little bitch friend."
"Hey!" a voice called out. Gale stood there, looking like a bull ready to charge. "Let him go."
"Get out of here, this has nothing to do…" Gloss' words were cute off by Gales fist slamming into his jaw. There was a sickening crunch sound and I was dropped to the ground. Gale waved his hand as if to try and stop the pain. A bright flash caught my eye as he stormed back inside. He was wearing the ring I left for him.
So I had a lot of hard decisions to make in this chapter. For one I was torn between having gale and peeta kiss or let them have amazing lovemaking before gale chickened out. Also I wasn't sure if I should have gloss hit on peeta or be angry at him. But I hope you enjoyed it.