Real or not? I had to keep asking myself, as the days seemed for the next week slipped away from my consciousness. The nightmares that haunted my dreams almost seemed to become reality. The horrors of the games seemed to being showing up while I was awake. At the District 5 meet and greet, I had could see Foxface dying all over again as if it was happening before me. I tried closing my eyes but it wouldn't go away. I tried my best to deprive myself of sleep but that only made things worse. Cato's face still haunted me, making me sick to my stomach with every traumatic flashback. I was no long safe sleeping or awake. I could hear screams that weren't really there. The bags under my eyes grew darker as lack of sleep started taking over.

Gale had spent every moment avoiding me. To him, Finnick had tainted me, and he wanted nothing to do with me. I wasn't sure how to feel. Gale was further from me than ever before despite being on the other side of the train. My feelings for him only seemed to grow the more he ignored me. But now Finnick had changed the game. He was giving out a love that reflected how I felt about Gale. Is this what it felt like? To have someone pine for you that you couldn't have? I was in a positing torn between two people, one that only loved me but I could never truly love back and one that could be the true love but could possibly never love me back.

After chugging through District 5 and 6, whose industries include electricity and transpiration respectively, our train slowed as it headed north. The thick smog filled cities of the past Districts were now replaced with lush green forests of trees as tall as some buildings in the Capital. The air seemed to be much cleaner than any of Districts we had been thus far. The temperature was much cooler than anything id felt before. It had been cold during the winter in District 12 but here it felt like it could snow at any minute. The warm sandy beaches of District 4 were a far cry from where we were now.

They provided us with much heaver clothes; long heavy pants, boots instead of shoes, large jackets stuffed with goose feathers. Effie has refused to wear change from her regular short pastel colored dresses. As we left from the train her teeth chattered together like a rattlesnakes tail. I looked to Gales, his angelic face looked at me before turning away in disgust. My heart dropped with every step we took towards the meeting with the victors from this district. I wanted him to talk to me, to let me explain that nothing happened between Finnick and I.

"Welcome to District 7," the mayor said greeting us. "Please to meet you all," He shook all our hands. "Let me introduce Ms. Johanna Mason" Johanna had a face of killer; wide-set brown eyes and short, brown, spiky hair, and a face that said she was not pleased to meet any of us.

"Now, let us have our meal so you can explore the wonders of our find district."

XXX

District 7's industry was lumber. The inside of the building was decorated with different kinds of axes and large woodcarvings. All the furniture was hand carved and the napkins were paper folded into the different animals. I had never seen anything so elegant. The food as lack luster at best, mostly stuff that must be canned incase of the long winters that must happen here.

"So what's the story?" Haymitch's voice asked as he sat down next me, I poked at the canned beans with my fork. "You've been walking around like a zombie for days now. Now either something happened or you're not the real Peeta. That Peeta is a charismatic and not afraid to say what's in his heart."

I couldn't eat anyways, I felt so depressed. Maybe I wasn't the real me anymore. "Maybe that Peeta died in the games." I'm just a walking hallowed out shell of the boy I used to be. "Gale thinks something happened between Finnick and I."

"Well did it?" He asked. I looked at him, knitting my eyebrows together and pursing my lips into a thin line. He put up his hands in defense. "Don't get your panties in a bunch, kid, just had to ask."

"He won't even look at me." I stared at him from across the room. He was just as handsome as the first day I ever met him. I remembered how he kissed me on the train, the feeling of his skin on fingertips, and just how much I would give to feel it again.

"This sounds like Déjà vu to me. You two seem to get alone one minute then hate each other the next. This is more melodramatic than the fake love story for between you and Princess over there." He pointed to Katniss, who was busy talking to Johanna.

"Finnick told me something." I spilled out. "He said we could run together, somewhere they would never find us. Somewhere just he and I could live."

Haymitch took a sip of his drink as he listened to me go on about the option Finnick had offered me. I wasn't sure why Haymitch cared so much, if he even did, but I knew I could trust him. "I don't know what to do."

"That I can't tell you." He said after I had finally stopped to take a breath from the long story of what happened in District 4. "You have to follow your heart on that one. But one thing is for sure; you didn't die in those games. They may have torn you down but that's just so you can build yourself up stronger than before. Don't let one boy ruin everything you worked to build."

Haymitch's word stuck me like the cord on a piano. I wasn't weak, I wasn't some plaything, and I wasn't going to allow myself to be toyed with anymore. If Gale was going to throw me by the wayside then so be it. The only problem was this feeling that was building up inside of me, a crippling, numbing spreading throughout my body, filling me with a sharp pain that seemed to be tearing my heart in half. How could I let go of him? Despite all of his shortcomings, I couldn't get over that that easily.

I stood from the table and made my way to the bar. I order a small glass of the white liquor Haymitch always drank. When the glass was served to me, I took it down in one gulp. It burned as it slithered down my throat and hit my stomach like a bomb. It wasn't instant but the feelings began ebb away. Instead it was replaced with a loose calming feeling. It was a nice temporary cap on the bottle I never wanted open. After two more I started to understand why Haymitch drank so much. It helped you fight those feelings you didn't want filling your body.

"A few more of those and we'll have to pick you up off the floor." A voice said as a body pulled up me. Johanna was at my side. I hadn't seen her coming. She clutched a drink in her hand as she leaned her body to the bar. "So what are you trying to forget?"

"Huh?"

"No one downs drinks like that unless they're trying to forget something. So what is it? Has to be pretty big."

I took another sip of my drink. "What are trying to forget?"

She killed off her drink with one swift motion. "I think the better question is what aren't I trying to forget?" Johanna looked around to make sure no one was listening. "I thought you should know, there's a thing going on in the woods tonight. I figured the way you were drinking you could use a little fun I remember when I was on the victory tour that I wanted nothing more than to let loose."

A party in the woods? That was definitely against the rules. If the peacekeepers found out everyone would be whipped… or worse. I'd probably be tortured on national TV. President Snow would love that. But the sound of getting a chance to really let go was too tempting. I missed the feeling Gale used to give me, and I missed the way Finnick made me feel.

"I'm in."

XXX

The sun had set, and what little heat it provided was now gone. I could see my breath like a white puff of smoke with every breath I took. If I weren't wearing this big jacket I would have been chilled to the bone. Haymitch and Effie hadn't heard me slink out of my bedroom. I waited for Johanna where she had told me to meet her. I don't know how long I spent out in the cold before her figured emerged from the dark.

We walked in silence, mostly so we wouldn't be heard. We crawled through the electric fence and deep into the heart of the woods. The lights of the district faded away into the dark behind us. We walked for a while before we came upon a small clearing. The trees had been cut away, most likely used in the distinct. Large stumps sat around a roaring fire. A mob of teens from the district all clamored around, drinking, smoking, and trying to keep warm.

"Here, have a drink." Johanna thrust a drink in to my hand and pours it to the rim of the glass. I don't waste any time. The burn from the liquor is familiar but comforting. I sat down by the fire and felt the heat warm my chilled skin. Looking around at the others, all young teens or early twenties. Everyone seemed comfortable with each other. Not surprising, they all grew up with each other. Just like at home, I felt like a stranger looking in. I drank from my glass, hoping to drown everything out.

"Hey Peeta, come here." Johanna yelled across the clearing. As if someone dropped a stink bomb, everyone seemed to notice her voice and all eyes were suddenly on me. I realized that everyone there now knew who I was. I was Peeta Mellark, the victor of the Hunger Games. I ducked my head into my hood and walked over to where she was standing with a group of people. "Here, take this."

She dropped a tiny white pill in the palm of my hand. I looked at with curiosity, unsure of what it was. "What is it?"

"Morphling. Believe me, it will make you feel good." I wasn't in a position to really care anymore. I thanked her and headed back to my seat on the tree stump. But before I could take my seat someone grabbed me. A strong hand grasped my wrist like a vice.

"What are doing? Are you crazy?" Gale's voice was stern like a father scolding a child. He pried my hands open and forced me to drop the pill. I look up to his face. His lips were pursed in a stern thin line, his brown knitted together in anger. I wrenched my hand from his grip. "You don't even know what's in that pill, it could kill you."

Part of me swelled in anger. I wanted to yell at him but for some reason, seeing him, I couldn't bring myself to do it. All I could choke out was "What are you even doing here? How did you find us?"

"I followed you. Had to make sure you didn't get into any trouble." I rolled my eyes and walked away from him. I wasn't a child, he wasn't my parent, and I certainly didn't need someone to keep an eye on me. I off, away from the fire, the crown, and Gale but he followed after me. "Where are you going?"

He tried to stop me but I pushed past him. "Why do you even care?" I finally couldn't hold it in anymore. "The last thing you said to me was 'I was dead to you.' For the past couple of weeks you've been back and forth. One second you hate, then you kiss me, then you hate me again. It's like you enjoy playing some kind of sick game. You love watching me get torn in two. Well I'm done with it. I can't keep putting myself through it."

In the dime velvet night I could barely make out his face but I could tell it was filled with hurt. My words had cut him worse than any knife. A part of me felt proud for finally standing up for myself but the other part, the more dominate part, felt guilty for doing so. Despite how he had been acting I still couldn't hate him. When every fiber of my being burned with rage he somehow was always able to bring me back.

Before either of us could say anything a wave of screams flooded he forest. Both of us turned to see the partygoers began to scatter into every direction. We heard sounds of barking that sent a sickening chill down my spine. It was the same barks as the muttations from the games. Peacekeepers had found us.

Gale grabbed my hand and pulled me along. We ran along but we had no idea where we were going. We could be lost and the Capital would really come hunting for us. They could turn us into a couple Avox for all they care. We took a sharp turn before huddling into a large tree. Gale pushed his back to the bark and pulled my back to his chest. Nether of us moved a muscle. I closed my eyes as my body went into panic mode. My heart was beating like a jackhammer. Gales hand cupped over my mouth to try and quiet my breathing. "Relax, keep quiet and don't move."

His body was calm, his breathing steady. I could feel his heartbeat as he pulled me close to him. It was slow and relaxed; he was able to keep calm. His other arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me closer to him. Being this close to him, being able to touch him, to feel his body on mine was better than any pill or drink. It was soothing to have him hold me in his strong arms, his thick coils of muscle snug around my body, holding me close to him. I felt like I was going to melt into him.

The sound of footstep crunching twigs and leaves drew closer to us. Gale's body slowly slid down into the dirt, dragging me with him. He was trying to make us as invisible as possible. I sat there, in-between his legs, feeling the warmth of his body radiating into me. The air choked in my throat as a Peacekeeper walked past us, a large gun clutched in both his hands. He didn't have a muttation with him so didn't see us in the dark and kept walking.

Once he was finally was out of earshot the cry that was stuck inside was finally released. All the terrible things that could have happened flashed through my mind. I saw images of Gale being whipped; me forced to watch as he cried out in pain. I forced my face into the material of his thick sweater. The tears I'd been holding in for show long finally overflowing into the soft fabric. One of his strong hands ran through my hair and the other rubbed my back. I don't know how long we stayed like that but I didn't want to move. I was scared for our lives. It had grown quiet now, all the other teens and peacekeepers had gone.

I looked up to his handsome face. It didn't matter how dark it was could always make out his beautiful features. I ran my finger down his chiseled jaw line. His eyes were such a bright gray they could illuminate the entire forest. I couldn't hold back any longer. With one movement I pressed my lips to his. My body felt like it was been lit up like a light bulb. His soft lips pressed into mine with a firm but loving way. Gales hand unzipped my jacket before plunging under my shirt, his rough calloused fingers running along the skin of my back, pulling me closer.

Gale's tongue parted my lips with a tender force. His hand traveled up my back, smoothing each of the ridges in my spine. I shudder with pleasure under his touch. Gale broke the kiss, gently letting his hands drop down to my hips. I opened his eyes to see him staring at him. I couldn't tell what he was thinking, let alone feeling. But I could feel the one part of his body that told me everything I needed to know. His erection was pressing into my body. He smiled.

I looked at his familiar and comforting eyes. He slowly pulled off my jacket and lifted my shirt over my head, biting his lip as he looked over my body. My torso long and abs were only slightly defined. I always felt fragile in some ways, with creamy fair skin the tone of porcelain. Gale traced his finger along one nipple. It was already hard from the frigid weather as he toyed with the tip. My body jerked in pleasure.

I ran my hands under his sweater, lifting the tight clothing. His body was much thicker than mine, as large slabs of muscle from working in the mines filled him out. His abs tightly carved and ran length of his stomach, his arm muscles were well-muscled; biceps thick round masses, like hills in a olive-toned landscape. Ropey veins that surfaced, running from his upper arms, before joining at the crease of his elbow. His cologne smelled musky, something that made my head spin and drove me as wild as a muttation.

I slid back into the frosty grass, small twig cracking under my weight. I could now see his hard dick through the pants, a large bulging mound held tight inside. Gale ran his hands up along my legs until his fingers fell to hem of my pants. With nimble fingers he popped the button and began to tug them from my body. His hand grasped the hard flesh through my underwear, causing a soft moan to escape from my lips. I hadn't expected this to ever happen, not like this. I had dreamed about it so many nights, I wasn't sure if this was real or not. The sound of his zipper coming down caused me to look him over. He slid his pants down, no underwear under to reveal his erect figure, large and thick and oozing with a glassy clear liquid. My body wanted him more now than ever.

His firm hands scooped me from the ground, pulling me into his lap. His soft lips met mine once more as he began to position my body over his. With one hand he held his erection at my opening. I had no idea what I should be doing, I was thankful he knew. I felt the large mushroom head slowly push inside of my body. Pain shot through my body like my entire lower half was being set on fire. I clenched my teeth, slowly breathing as he pushed further into me. Large blobs of tears welled up in my eyes. I wanted it to stop but at the same time I wanted him to keep going. His tender lips fell to my neck and sucked and bit at the skin, trying his best to keep my mind off of the pain crippling my body. I slid down on his firm body until I reached his base. I took me a few seconds for my mind to clear.

He slowly guided me up a small amount before letting me slide back down. The pain was still there but now it began to mix with a pleasure I had never felt before. Again he made me rise and fall until I realized I needed to do it myself. My hands fell to his shoulders to help bring myself up and down on top of him. His muscular arms wrapped around my slender body pulling me closer to him. His teeth sank around my nipple, I gasped as he slowly gnawed at me. He began rhythmically thrusting with my body. The pleasure had now taken over, the pain a distant memory. One of my hands grasped a large chunk of his hair as we sped up our movements. Despite the chilled temperature I was sweating as our barely dressed bodies moved in one.

Small whimpers began to escapes from him as his body began to tighten. I could tell he was getting closer to finishing. My body was reaching its climax, like I had climbed an incredibly high hill and now I was going to let myself fall. His whimpers turned to moans as every muscle in his body clenched, and with one last large thrust released his seed deep inside my body. I couldn't hold it back anymore, I nearly cried with pleasure as my body released what had been built-up inside me for so long. My body spasmed with ripples of pure bliss as I felt everything drain from me and empty between our bodies.

We collapsed to the ground, both of us a sweat, sticky and, dirty mess. I felt like I was flying high, dancing on the clouds, defying gravity itself, and nothing was going to make me come down. My mind was blurred and my thoughts scrambled. My body hurt but the good kind. The kind that lets you know you lived a little. I still hadn't began to pull my thoughts back together when Gale had already dressed himself and offered me a hand. He pulled me to my feet and began to refasten my clothing he had torn off. I was so tired and weak I wasn't sure I could do it myself if I wanted. I think he know because as soon as I was dress he offered me a ride on his back.

"Come on, time to go back." It was the first thing he had said to me since the Peacekeepers invaded. I climbed atop of him strong back and nuzzled my face into the crease of his neck as he carried me through the woods with ease.

XXX

We slicked our way back into the train. Undetected we headed for our car. Once we reached them I slid down off his back to my door. We hadn't really said anything to each other. There was a strange silence in the air. Not the silence of 'we-just-kissed' silence, but one of post-lovemaking bliss. Everything we had been keeping to our selves had finally been expelled. We stood at the doors to our rooms just looking at each other. I could feel my cheeks burn slightly as he smiled at me.

"I guess I should go shower." I stammered out, unsure of myself.

He nodded in agreement. "Yeah, same here… you kinda made a mess on me."

If my cheeks burned before they were on fire now. I let the door slowly creek open before I mustered up a little bravery. There was no point in playing coy now. "If you want, maybe… you'd like… to shower… with me?" I bit my lip in anticipation.

His flashy handsome smile grew across his face as he pulled his shirt off, tossed it in his room and headed to mine. He grabbed my wrist as he pulled me close to his body and kissed me again. It was just as magical as when we did it the first time on the back of the train. I kicked the door close as he pulled me towards the shower.

Hey readers. I'm very sorry about the lack of updates. Not gonna lie there's been a lot going on in my life since I last updated. I graduated from college, trying to get a real grown up job (with little success). I've been spending a lot of time doing other stories, writing an original story that I would love to try and get published, and dealing with life. There's been a lot of ups and downs since then but I finally decide to update because I was getting a lot of response begging for it. Also with Catching Fire coming out soon it somewhat revived my love for this story. I kinda feel in love with Teen Wolf (mtv show).

This was the chapter I really wanted to do (mostly because of the hot sex). I tried to keep it less cock and fuck and more euphemisms. I think it sounds a little classier and less 50 shades of Hunger Games.

I'm so glad so many of you yelled at me to keep going. Please keep the reviews coming they are my fuel. Please tell me what you think; if you love it tell me, if you fucking hated it, tell me, I can take it. I'm a big boy. But if you are a fan of a story PLEASE REVIEW!