FOLLOW YOUR ARROW
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Holy shit...
The first kiss wasn't all that glamorous, by any standards. After all, it was two men, both used to being in the position of dominance. Two men, awkwardly embracing, and more than just a little drunk.
The first kiss was little more than their mouths smashing against each other.
But that was okay, Hidan thought. He didn't mind so much. He couldn't mind if he wanted to, seeing as at the moment he felt like he was literally going to pass out from the severe shock of what was happening.
Holy fucking shit...
They both had their eyes open, making the strange situation all the stranger. But His boss didn't seem to mind either. Their gaze locked on each other, waiting for some sort of sign as to whether it should continue or end here, neither able to give that sign due to the feeling of expansion in their chest, that if they moved or drew in a single breathe, they'd both explode and take the entirety of the world with them.
At least that's what Hidan could gather, seeing as Kakuzu had much the same look in his slightly wide, bloodshot eyes as the pale man was feeling.
He's... He's... I'm... We're...
He'd been put back down, their lips had parted, though Hidan's remained slightly open as he stared up at the older man in wonder, the confusion already working it's way out of his mind as his alchohol-drowned brain decided it didn't care what the reasoning was behind it.
His tounge came out to run across them, tasting scotch... Scotch and Kakuzu.
It was good, he thought. He'd like to taste more.
Kissing... kissed. He kissed... me. He actually just fucking kissed me...
He tried to will himself to move, seeing the shift in the older man's eyes as he seemed to submerge back into reality as well. If he didn't react soon, or do something, he would likley walk away, never to speak of the moment again.
Hidan was so far beyond drunk, he knew this much, the edges of his vision were fuzzy, he was still having trouble standing upright of his own strength, but his head was buzzing in clarity. If only the damn shock would wear off.
Move, legs... arms, mouth. Anything, something, just move!
He managed to draw in a breathe, but at the same time, his employer took a step back, those crazy, wonderful eyes staring into his own for a moment before they were torn away, to Hidan's dissatisfaction.
Damn, He was going to leave.
Fuck.
Shit.
Do something!
How about next time he does something nice, instead of insulting him because you're embarrassed, thank him.
"Th-thank you!" He forced out, wincing when it sounded somewhat frantic. It was frantic though, as the elder man had just begun to turn around. He hesitated now, turning back to his employee with a questioning brow raised, remaining silent.
"Thank you..." Hidan breathed again, still at a loss as for anything else to do or say. Just don't go. Please don't go.
"For what?" He finally grated out, his voice sounding slightly deeper than usual, sending a small shiver up Hidan's spine.
Fuck. Holy shit. This is insane.
But he liked insanity. It made more sense than reality, after all.
"For... for coming... I guess..." He said, shrugging slightly.
Kakuzu narrowed his eyes at him suspiciously. "You guess?"
Hidan fidgeted nervously, wringing his hands, somewhat happy that he had control over his body again, somewhat pissed off that the moment had passed and now he had no idea what to do, except keep the man from leaving. He wasn't sure why, he just didn't want him to, this wierd pain in his chest might smother him if the man left. He didn't know how, or why, but he knew it would.
"Well... You still didn't tell me happy birthday..." He mumbled out, wincing as he executed an extremley powerful mental kick to himself.
What the fuck are you doing!? Don't piss him off!
The older man said nothing for awhile, instead he closed the distance between them again, Hidan's naked upper chest only half a millimeter away from touching Kakuzu's fully clothed one.
The man reached out to the younger, making his insides erupt into an inferno, while outwardly he only stiffened slightly, managing to smother the choked sound that almost slipped from him as Kakuzu's strangley soft hands momentarily brushed his skin when he fixed some sort of kink on the chain of his necklace.
"It's not your birthday." He said lowly, dropping his hands.
"It feels like it." Hidan muttered back without thinking, having raised his head to look back up in the man's eyes. He tipped his head slightly, still feeling as if maybe this situation weren't real. The alchohol numbing him really made it feel more like an out-of-body-experience. "You like me." He said, though not in a question. "You actually do..."
Kakuzu didn't respond, only stared back at him, as unreadable as ever. Hidan didn't mind though, he found himself strangley comfortable with just standing here like this all night, looking at him. "Itachi thought you did. But I didn't believe him, because it didn't make sense... because why would someone like you... like me?"
"I've been wondering the same thing..." Kakuzu said lowly, almost quietly, his stance rigid and features expressionless.
Pigmentless eyes widened, thoughts flashed through his head, all of them far too fast to capture before they were gone. He blinked, unable to close his eyes to a natural width, despite them starting to sting from being held open so far for so long.
"Tell me happy birthday." He finally said, not really knowing why.
Kakuzu's stare shifted into a half-glare, almost as a way to roll his eyes without having to look away. He stood silent, the thoughts going through his mind just as mysterious to Hidan as always. Normally he would get angry, when the man did this kind of thing, acting all stoic, as if he were so much better than the rest of humanity. But at the moment his drunken mind found it sort of... endearing.
"Happy birthday... Hidan."
He smiled at the words, not a smirk or a grin, but an actual smile. It seemed to catch the elder by slight surprise, judging by the way his brows went up in interest, and his eyes moved down to Hidan's mouth.
That tightness in his chest wound tighter, almost physically paining him, almost making him collapse to the floor. "Okay." He said instead, as if agreeing with an order given to him.
The christmas-ey eyes flicked back up to his pink. "Okay?"
Hidan nodded. "Okay."
Before Kakuzu could pull away, before that pain in his torso could get any worse, before any more words could be said, he pushed up to his tiptoes, somewhat hesitantly put his hands on the taller mans chest, and gave him another kiss, lingering there for a moment to make it more than just a shy little peck, waging war on the disgusting blush he felt trying to creep across him.
He wasn't a girl, damn it.
Finally the man showed some emotion, eyes widening as he gazed down at Hidan, hands still on his chest, body now pressed lightly against his. He couldn't resist giving the man a small smirk for it either. He deserved it, taking him off guard with some random bullshit kiss. It's a good thing the zealot wasn't some sort of sappy romanticist* or he'd probably be pissed at the fucker right now, being so un-smooth like that.
The shock was wearing off now, all the previous feelings of uncertianty in his infatuation for the elder man almost seemed to have been washed away with that first act of affection. All that was left now was their mutual attraction hanging there wide on the table, and Hidan's drunken inability to continue controlling himself.
It wasn't wierd anymore, was it? Kakuzu initiated it, after all. At least that's what he reasoned, seeing as his inebriation kept him from recalling the small detail that he was actually the one that had pronounced his feelings in a haphazard sort of way. Kakuzu had pounced on him, for all he knew at this point. But he wasn't bothered by it, how the fuck could he be!? After months and months of stealing secret glances at the man, shaking himself from secret daydreams, slapping sense into himself. Even just last night, sitting there talking with Itachi, these uncontrollable emotions driving him insane, the raging want for the man eating away at him, driving him to desperation for some sort of narcotic to free him from the torment, if only for one measly night.
And here he was, ready and willing. How the fuck could he pass it up?
He smiled, pushing up to the balls of his feet again. This time Kakuzu actually responded, envoking a low half-growl of interest from the younger as he suddenly became aggressive. The one tanned hand moved up to the back of his neck, the other gripping again at his ribcage as he simultaneously pulled Hidan toward him, but pushed the two of them as one object back until they hit the counter. Their lips crushed together again, but this time with less of the awkwardness and more desire and scarecley retained lust. And this time they didn't come apart for a long while.
Hidan let his eyes close now, as the room was spinning from he-didn't-even-know-which-to-blame, Kakuzu or the alchohol. And he found that this action only intensified everything.
He felt like he'd burst into flames, as if his chest had finally been unable to hold all the pressure inside, as if a hole had torn and everything was leaking out, lighting a fire at his feet that enveloped them both.
He realized with a start, as his tongue slipped out of his own mouth and ventured into Kakuzu's, that he was moaning lowly every so often, revelling in this wonderful burn he felt down to his very core. He only put a very small amount of energy and thought toward stopping himself, abandoning the notion after awhile. He couldn't help it, the taste of his boss was so invigorating, sweet and bitter at the same time, sort of like his personality, he reasoned. Far better than anything he could have imagined. And the scotch only helped, enhancing the taste with Hidan's beloved alchohol, aged to perfection.
Just like Kakuzu, hah.
If they even aged Scotch... maybe that was just wine. He didn't know much about it, fuck, it was far too much of a fancy, 'old man' drink for him to enjoy anyway.
All he knew is that it was a perfect addition to the man's taste and breath alike. So very 'Kakuzu'.
His hands explored, given free reign as his mind focused completley on the two's mouths. They slid underneath the elders open duster, across his ribs, then stopping to change direction. They slid down now, not stopping until they felt the edge of the man's trousers, tracing along the fabric for a few lasting moments.
Kakuzu pressed himself harder into the younger man, his fingers somewhat clawing into Hidan's exposed upper back. That was okay, in fact, that was perfect, given the small gasp that his body took in without his permission. The elder seemed to make a note of it, as distracted as he was. His hands, suddenly not quite as soft as Hidan had noted just earlier, trailed down his skin, both of them coming to a stop at his waist. He pulled Hidan toward him, pressing into him again, grinding hips and groins alike.
Another gutteral moan from the younger, just before his own mouth was assaulted by his boss's toungue. Previous to that he'd been the one doing all the oral exploration, but now was put back into his place by the doctor, pushing against him hungrily.
Holy fuck...
His hands slipped under the mans shirt, tentativley slipping underneath onto the coffee-colored skin.
This is...
Kakuzu didn't seem to even notice, and so he moved his hands upward, pulling the fabric up with him. He had the chance now, as the doctor had said. He didn't let the thought creep into his mind about what would happen next, he didn't let himself worry about if this would ever happen again, or if it was just some one time thing. He just focused on the intense pleasure vibriating through every inch of him, as if alive despite being nothing but energy. He would do whatever he wanted now, satisfy his curiosity, and worry about everything else later.
It was his party, after all. He'd molest his boss if he wanted to.
This is fucking hot.
Hah, making out with his boss. His boss the doctor. Dr. Hoku.
Oh God... he's really fucking good at this...
The doctor's hands ran softly up his side, making him stiffen against a shiver, feeling goosebumps prickled across his skin, feeling the moan vibrate his throat but not really hearing it come out as Kakuzu pushed against him even harder. He pushed back, realizing he was being completley dominated, though that wasn't the part that made him resist it. It was the fact that he was in front of a fucking counter and not against a wall, he had nothing for his back to press against, if he didn't push back the older man may very well climb on top of him.
Maybe that would be too much... maybe...
He received an aroused grunt for his efforts, making him let out a heavy breath in victory. His hands continued sliding up the front of the older man, beneath his shirt. Oh, how he wished he could just take it off. Kakuzu had always looked fit, but he'd never actually gotten to see it, and feeling it blindly with his hands only enticed him further. The man certainly was in great shape, with rolls of chorded muscle all across his abs, his broad chest, protruding pectorals, thick neck...
Oh God... He thought again, dragging in a desperate breathe in through his nose so he didn't have to break away from the other man's mouth. He's perfect...
He was almost made self-concious of his own body, lean from lack of proper exersize. Most of his workouts were cardio-related, keeping him skinny, but not all that muscular. He had the muscles there beneath his skin, but unless he flexed, they usually remained mostly out of sight.
Maybe Kakuzu was flexed, trying to impress him. Or maybe trying to restrain himself. Either way, he was impressed. He wanted to see more, he needed to see more... feel more...
He was going to die, he decided, if this didn't either stop, or progress further soon. His nether regions burned with arousal, ached in the restraints of his relitivley tight jeans, being pinned even further by Kakuzu's own girth against his, seperated only by these damn, pesky clothes.
He growled under his breath, only just now realizing the Doctors hands had snaked down, somehow, sliding beneath his jeans though still over his boxer-briefs, and were now tightly squeezing his ass, pulling his lower body tighter against him, though it didn't seem possible.
He responded with his upper body as well, struggling to pulls his arms out from under the man's shirt and wrap them around his neck, using his wide shoulders as leverage to pull himself up to where he was actually sitting on the counter, his inner thighs squeezing into Kakuzu's hip bones.
It was a little surreal, only slightly strange to him, letting himself take the position that usually belonged to the female. Even when he'd been in this situation with other men , he was always the one in Kakuzu's place, initiating the contact, controlling the pace, doing what he wanted while the other sat back and received it happily. Thanks to the alchohol, and the fact that Kakuzu was much larger, and he admitted, stronger, than him, he didn't mind so much, doing it this way.
The old fucker was surprisingly good, after all.
-o-
Adjusting his grip on Hidan's ass, he slid the man into his body again, though the counter had offset the alignment of their bodies. The younger man's crotch was now against his stomache, and he was rather excited, the doctor could tell.
That was fine, it only aroused him further, knowing Hidan was enjoying it too, and that he hadn't lost his touch, even after all these incredibley long years. He had very distant control of himself, he thought. Things certianly wouldn't be going that far, but he'd given himself a very long leash, his own words ringing through his mind. Hidan might not get to drink again for awhile, and as far out of it as he was now, who knew how he'd react -if he even remembered- in the morning. This may or may not ever happen again, and the old man thought, maybe, in his tipsy mind, that he could deal with that, as long as he got to do what he wanted now.
After all, his affection for the brat wasn't so great that he wanted to take him to bed, thsi was more than enough to suffice all the suffering he'd gone through the last few months. He was just fine with this, though as the seconds passed by, as Hidan let out more and more of those delicious sounds, as he continued to touch him with those pale little fingers and those outrageously smooth palms, he became less sure of that thought.
No, it was just lust, just his human body making a human reaction. Nothing more. He knew that, that much never wavered in his mind.
But damn did he want it more and more with each passing second.
He'd been unsure at first that he liked it, the idiot tasted so strongly of cigarettes and liquor, it was hard to find anything enjoyable about it. But when that damn tongue had run across his lower lip, and that tingleing had been left there, well, he couldn't have pulled away if he wanted to. Now that he'd been able to bypass that, he couldn't get enough.
His eyes were open, unfocused with heavy lids, but open. He didn't think he could let them close, as that would make all these sensations he'd forgotten about double in strength, and to the older man, they were already pretty intense.
He let his hands do what they wanted, let his body push itself against the younger man, feeling no humility, especially not when Hidan responded so well. When he caused the man pain, he hadn't thought anything of it, at least until he'd let out a moan of appreciation instead of a squeak of alarm.
So the little idiot was a sexual masochist eh? Hm, it wasn't that uncommon actually, he didn't know why it sent another ripple of excitement through him. Perhaps because he was somewhat of a sadist, and not just in bed either, as had been made clear by now, he thought.
He bit into the mans lower lip, perhaps a little harder than neccesary, running his tongue over it in a soothing action when the action rewarded him with a hiss and an unintellible grunt that he thought was most likley a curse. Greedy little hands slipped back down his shoulders, clutching at his coat, attempting to pull the larger man closer but only doing the opposite when Kakuzu didn't budge.
The kiss deepened past the limits of reality, though it didn't actually change except for the almost desperate way Hidan was going about it, the drunken fool. The irrisistable, sexy, submissive, little drunken fool.
Damn.
He was getting too much into it, he wanted it to go farther. And the little twerp was going to keep pushing for it, and honestly he didn't know if he'd be able to stop him if he let his own emotions get any more out of hand.
He broke away finally, thinking it might sober Hidan from the situation. It didn't stop the little bastard at all, he just pulled himself closer, attacking Kakuzu's throat with that accursedly delicious mouth. The older man was taken back by the sharp nips, the gentle pecks, and the both rough and easy sucking given to his neck.
Well fuck.
He felt the involuntary groan emerge from himself at the actions, letting his eyes close finally, unable to keep them open any longer. His teeth grit together as his insides heated even further, trying to maintain his control. Of course that little brat would do this to him, after all, that's what this whole thing was about, Hidan's strange way of making him unable to control himself.
He supposed that clarity he'd felt before this happened had boosted his confidence just a little too much, making him think he was once again in control. That he would remain that way, that whatever funk he'd been in was officially over and wouldn't return.
He was wrong, apparently. And with his mind slowly giving way to his desire to do terrible things to this body against his, he couldn't even decide if it was a bad thing or not.
His head tilted, giving Hidan better access to that sensitive area just below his jawline, by his ear. Hidan nipped at it as if reading his mind, and white specks danced across the inside of his closed eyeslids. His body felt weak, distant. He could feel the control slipping from him, going far past any level he'd ever succeeded before.
He'd never loosed himself completley, never felt this kind of raging desire to fuck someone sensless. No one had ever responded this well, after all, and he could count on two hands all the people he'd ever had in his bed. None of them had ever fit him so perfectly, yet somehow still contrasted so immensely as Hidan.
It was infuriating, and irresistable.
Double fuck.
After all this time of being stuck in his monotonous rut, He'd more or less given up the hope of finding anything to interest him the way this boy did. As Kisame had said, he wasn't aware there were any more surprises left to encounter. Normally, unexpected things were bad, Hidan's intrusion into his life had been bad. Had being the key word there. Right now, wrapped in the intensity of the moment, he didn't think it was so bad. Maybe everything Kisame and Itachi had said to him was right, maybe all the rationalizations he'd made to himself had been wrong.
Maybe there really was something to this idiotic little brat that he hadn't seen before...
Air whooshed out of him as sharp teeth sunk into his earlobe, and he heard Hidan's soft laughter at his reaction. For some reason the sound drove him even closer to the edge, and with slight inner panic he felt himself start to slip as he forced the mans face up, gripping his jaw with one hand, and smashed their lips together again. He removed his hand only to grip at the pale wrists attached to the hands caressing him, with a slight growl of protest from Hidan, he forced both of the youngers hands back behind his body, restraining him from touching him anymore.
He had to get himself off this boy, like, five minutes ago.
Hidan arched his back though when the doctor was unable to pull his mouth away, leaning over Hidan. The submissive actions feuled his lust further, a string of swears went off in his head like firecrackers. Hidan's thighs squeezed him, and the younger fought to keep their mouths pressed together even as Kakuzu used every ounce of what was left of his self-control to pull himself away.
You're making it worse, you idiot.
He couldn't find the energy to say the words out loud, what with the animalistic noises grating from him, his breathes heavy with vague panic and intense arousal. Bloody hell, he was going to lose his mind, he thought, fighting the surge of raw heat that floated up in his when Hidan ripped his hands free, slipped them swiftly back under his shirt, around his body and up his back. With a hard suck and bite to the older mans lip, he dug his nails into his skin and dragged them downward.
Kakuzu might have been embarrassed of the noise he made if his vision hadn't gone black for that half-second. If his urges hadn't possessed his body, making him reach down, rushing to unbutton the younger's pants.
Part of him, still halfway within reality, still halfway sober, wondered how long this had been going on, how long it would take before someone came back here, if he had enough time to-
At that exact moment the doorknob turned, letting out a click behind him.
Damned bloody irony.
He could only halfway pay attention, there was no time to recover into a better position, not that he cared to. Kisame said that it was only he and Itachi that would come back here, and both of those two were apparently aware of the situation between Dr. Hoku and his employee. They wouldn't interefere, he knew. And if he did, he'd just kill them. Not literally, of course... at least he didn't think so. At this point he wasn't sure of anything, it had been so damned long...
He heard the music blow into the room like a whirlwind as the door opened. Hidan stiffened, drawing in a breath as his mouth froze against Kakuzu's, and suddenly his vision returned, leaving him staring down in moderate confusion at the his own hands, with hidan's pants tugged halfway off his hips. A second later the door was shut again, but neither of the men continued. They only stared between each other, the sound of someone catching them somewhat sobering them both almost instantanously.
Kakuzu's body still burned with the urge to rip off the boys clothes, but he was better able to restrain it now, and slowly he leaned back, though not pulling away. He took in a few calm breaths to collect himself, and slowly, deliberatley, refastened Hidan's fly, blinking repeatedly in disbelief at himself.
Holy shit.
It hadn't seemed that bad at the time, but now that he was back in control, he realized that he'd almost just... to someone half his age... in public...
Fucking hell.
Hidan was still breathing heavily looking at him with clouded eyes, his expression tweaking itself as thoughts went through his mind. Dissapointment, anger, exitement, dissapointment again, more anger, embarrassment, arousal. Kakuzu found it almost interesting to watch, usually the temperamental idiot was just as hard to read as he, himself.
Slowly, the awkwardness seeped back between them as they remained in that position, Kakuzu not backing away to let Hidan down from the counter. He couldn't, as shocked with his own behavior as he was, that feeling still lingered. The possessiveness, He wanted Hidan, not just wanted him, he needed to have him, to own him, Hidan had to be his. Damn the consequences.
"Holy shit..." The pale man breathe through swollen lips.
"Hm" Kakuzu grunted in agreement, the unspoken question lingering heavily in the air.
Now what?
-o-
Itachi closed the door quickly, turning around and leaning against it, holding his arms crossed across his chest to try and contain the uncharactaristic giggling he couldn't seem to restrain.
Kisame stared at him in amusement, leaning still against the wall where he had been since Hidan's performance. "Something going on in there?" He asked his lover, a chuckle of his own slipping out just for witnessing the usually oh-so-composed Uchiha subject himself to a giggle-fit.
"Something is definitely going on in there." He clarified, still laughing.
"Eck, I'm glad you saw it. That might scar me for life, walking in on something like that."
He moved to come stand next to Kisame, giving him a light smack on the arm. "Oh hush. They're only kissing, it's romantic."
"Kissing. You make it sound harmless."
"Oh no, it wasn't just kissing. You want me to show you what they were doing?" He said, walking his index finger up Kisame's bicept and along his shoulder, having to stretch quite a bit to do so, before stroking his cheek.
The giant laughed and grabbed him, wrapping his arms around him and lowering his head to put it against the Uchiha's. "You're drunk, babe."
"Mm. Very much so."
"It's adorable."
"I'm glad. Don't let me embarrass myself, or I'll have to hurt you."
"Wouldn't dream of it, Angel." He said, pushing his lips against the much shorter man briefly before pulling away. "No one get's to see you relax but me. I know how you like to keep up appearances."
"Yes." Itachi said, licking his lips seductivley. "People wouldn't take me seriously otherwise, seeing as I'm so small, and apparently a woman."
"I dunno babe, you can be pretty intimidating when you want to be."
"Of course I can. I have to be, like I said." He said, shrugging. "Kiss me again."
Kisame chuckled, obliging. When they broke away, he raised a teasing brow at his young boyfriend. "You're not all hot and bothered from seeing them together are you?"
Itachi blushed, to the bigger man's amusement, given away by his devious grin.
"Ahh, Itachi. You're so full of surprises. Just when I begin to think there's no way you're just human, you go and do something like this."
His cheeks still burning, Itachi hid his face in the mans chest. "Shut up." He mumbled. He was a little horny, he'd admit it. After all, it had been a long time coming, and a lot of work and self-restraint on his part to get those two idiots together. This party alone had cost him thousands of dollars. And it wasn't as if he, himself, had seen any action in... good lord it had almost been a year now!
It was worth it though. He couldn't wait for them to finish up their little session so he could see his best friends face.
He scowled into Kisame's gut at this. He really hoped the Doctor wouldn't go so far as to actually have intercourse right there in the kitchen... maybe some sort of distraction was called for. He knew from experience how hard it could be to control one's self when enough time had passed between sexual encounters, and when little miss alchohol got herself involved, well, there was rarely hope.
"Uh oh..." Kisame said, pulling Itachi from his thoughts then as he leaned back to look up at the man, then following his gaze. It landed on Tayuya, making her way toward them, her eyes focused hungrily on them both, which perplexed the Uchiha for a moment before he recalled Hidan's warnings in the kitchen at the beginning of the night. The girl apparently had some sort of crush on the two of them, and she'd likley just seen them kiss...
Her expression blanked out as she came closer though, specifically when Itachi quickly stepped out of the embrace to stand in front of her, in case she was heading toward the kitchen to find Hidan.
"Hey, you guys seen that albino fucker? He said was gonna go kick someone's ass, but he's been gone awhile. He's not like, bleeding to death out back is he?" She had a terrible slur as well as a slight lisp as she talked, her gently swaying stance and giving away her level of intoxication. Itachi was somewhat impressed, though. She'd had even more than Hidan, but was handling it far better than his dear friend. And from what he'd gathered, the woman had only just turned 22 in February. Which meant she'd done quite a large amount of drinking since becoming legal to gain the tolerance she had now.
He blinked, mentally facepalming and wondering why he assumed she'd waited till she was legal. She was just like Hidan, afterall, who'd been drinking since 14.
"He's...uh... busy..." Kisame covered in Itachi's silence. He smiled up at the man for the act, nodding in agreement.
"Yes, someone special came by to see him, they're having a chat."
"Oh? More of his friends? Fuckin' sweet, I wanna meet'em." She said, about to sidestep Itachi before he moved in line with her, keeping her from advancing.
"What the fuck!?" She said. "What's your problem? Is he fucking someone or what?"
"Of course not." Itachi said quickly, possibley a little too quickly, judging by the suspicious look the woman was giving him now. "He requested privacy, that's what we're giving him."
"Bullshit." She said quickly, "He was too pissed when stormed outta there. What the fuck's going on back there?"
Itachi cursed her knowing friendship with the man, she was sharper than she let on, especially being as drunk as she was. He scrambled internally for something to tell her, his mind unable to come up with anything other than the imagine of Hidans legs and Kakuzu's back and the nagging urge to distract her and give them more time.
"Kisame!" He suddenly piped cheerfully, clapping his hands and twirling to the man. "You're musically inclined, why haven't you sang yet?" He said to him, giving him a sickly sweet smile, trying to stare the hidden message into the older man.
The distraction worked, and Tayuya beamed, whirling to him. "You sing!?" She gasped, and Itachi gave himself a mental pat on the back, breatheing out a relieved sigh.
"What!? I don't sing!" Kisame objected, making itachi snap his head to glare at him.
"Sure you do, get up there and put on a show." He said, slowly and deliberatley.
Kisame's brow dropped, pleading with Itachi not to make him do this. "But... I... I have to..."
"Nonsense, we've already gotten rid of all the trouble-makers. Go have fun." He said, waving at him with an apologetic and pleading look of his own.
"Yeah! C'mon, Hidan did it, I'm sure you couldn't suck any worse than that fucking dumb bitch that tried to sing that Miley Cyrus* song." She said, grabbing his wrist and attempting to drag him behind her. The big man didn't budge, of course, too busy giving Itachi sad, puppy eyes.
"Oh! I'll even sing with you! I know the perfect song, you can rap, right!?"
"What!?" He yelped, letting her pull him along merley out of shock now. "What makes you think I can rap?"
"Well, You're black aren't you? Just come on, quit being a fucking pansy. You can sing to Itachi even."
"But-"
"I said COME THE FUCK ON!" She snarled, giving a great heave and sucessfully budging him forward again. He finally followed now, stareing back at Itachi -who had a hand over his mouth to smother his laughter- in betrayal.
With that out of the way, he reasoned with himself that he should go check on those two. It was likley that his interruption had gone unnoticed, as Hidan was drunk out of his mind, and the Doctor had downed quite a bit of that Scotch in a very short amount of time.
There was also the chance that they had noticed, and had stopped. And if that was the case, he wouldn't mind intruding a second time. They had been back there awhile, as Tayuya had stated. He'd wanted them to do something, (And something they'd certianly done) but he didn't want it to get out of hand...
And besides, he wasn't sure if he could handle seeing Kisame do a drunken rap on stage without killing himself in a hysterical fit of laughter. He felt somewhat bad, as he knew he would be absoloutly furious if Kisame had done the same thing to him, but what the man had said before forcing Itachi to climb out that window had stuck with him; Desperate times call for desperate measures.
And he supposed maybe mixed in there somewhere was a little bit of payback.
He gave the man a wicked smile across the room before turning around and moving back to the door that led to the kitchen. Considering something, he knocked on it a few times. There was no response, and so he turned the knob and pushed it open.
Again he was greeted with the sight of Kakuzu's back, but Hidan was no longer on the counter. In fact, the two were sitting at the table, talking calmly. At least they were before the squeak of the door opening attracted their attention. The doctor twisted to see the intruder, and Hidan leaned sideways to see around his boss, giving a quizzical look to Itachi before his liquored-up brain finally recognized him, then he broke into a smile.
"'Tachiiii..." He drawled, making the elder man roll his eyes. "My best friend. Was that you earlier spying on us?"
Itachi stepped in fully now, pushing the door shut behind him by leaning back onto it. "Yes, It was too quiet, I wanted to make sure you two hadn't killed each other. I apologize for interrupting."
"Tch, Whatever. I don't care. I don't care about anything right now. Way too fuckin' happy." He said, waving Itachi's apology away and giving the older man a goofy grin. The Uchiha himself couldn't help but smile at this. The party was now a complete success, he believed he'd erradicated each and every one of Hidan's worries in one night.
Itachi pushed off the door and walked cautiously up to the two men, eyeing Kakuzu as he did, trying to get some kind of reaction out of him. He noticed that he'd refilled his glass with the bottle Kisame had brought in earlier. His ice was gone, and the beverage was most likley no longer cold, but he didn't seem to mind.
In fact the Doctor looked strangley unconcerned with anything. He wasn't smiling, but he wasn't scowling, his forhead was free of creases, lips not pursed, jaw not clenched... And because of this the Uchiha felt a wash of pride in himself. Hidan wasn't the only one having his problems soothed.
He pulled out a chair and sat down, despite telling himself he didn't want to make anything uncomfortable. It was mainly just for the fact that he felt suddenly dizzy. That damn alchohol. He decided to skip the awkward mentions of what he'd caught them doing and jump right to a topic that would lighten the mood. After all, he could get any details he needed from Hidan tomorrow, when he was sober and not recovering from the effects of what looked to be pure ecstasy. In the hypothetical sense, not the drug, obviously.
"Your friend is forcing Kisame to sing with her on stage." He said with a devious grin.
If Hidan were taking a drink right now he would have spit it everywhere. Instead he just sort of flailed in his seat, and choked briefly on air before bursting into laughter.
Kakuzu turned to him with a brow raised. "Kisame is going to sing?"
"Well, She mentioned something about him rapping, being the black man that he is."
To his surprise, this actually provoked a snort from Kakuzu, though he quickly recovered from it. Though Hidan only went into another snickering fit. "Is that this 'Tayuya' girl you keep refferring to?" He asked Hidan in that deep voice of his.
"Ain't she a fucking peach?" He laughed.
"I'm slightly distrubed at the fact that I almost want to witness this..." Kakuzu said back.
Itachi smiled in his chair, warmed to the core by how drastically the two men's interactions with each other had changed. Instead of being tense and moody, as usual, they were actually being casual. In fact it was Dr. Hoku's reactions that astounded him the most. He never would have thought the closed-off man would react so readily. Even around Kisame, who'd been his friend for years, he didn't act so easy-going.
Hm... He supposed this, too, could be blamed on the alchohol. But he'd take partial credit, because he was feeling a little greedy, what with the spectacular success of this last-minute scheme.
"Well," he finally spoke up, glancing from his watch to the clock on the wall to double-check the time. "Seeing as It's almost four in the morning, I think we should probably call it a night after they do their little song. We were only supposed to have the DJ until midnight anyway, he'll be expecting a large tip, I assume."
"Tch. Pinkie probably talked him into it. Crazy bitch."
"I have no doupt." Itachi agree, massaging his eyes. With any luck, he could talk his way out of paying for an extra four hours. "Regardless, Kisame and I will likley stay and help clean this mess up. You're welcome to go home if you wish Hidan, If Dr. Hoku is willing to give you a ride, that is."
"No one at this party is fit to drive, Mister Uchiha."
"Of course, I meant for him to ride in the taxi with you."
"It makes no difference to me." The older man grumbled.
Hidan smiled at him in silence for a moment before slapping his hand on the table, pushing himself from the seat, and leaning backward to pop his back. "Whell, either fucking way, I'm gonna go watch Shark-dick embarrass the shit out of himself. "
"You never know Hidan, he may be as talented as you." Itachi piped, also rising from his seat.
"Oh yeah. I forgot I did that..." He said, his face going blank and worrying his roommate for a second as to how he might react.
"That was fucking awesome." He finally concluded, moving around Kakuzu and to the door, and letting the Uchiha release his held breath, before meeting the elder man's eyes.
His expression was as unreadable as always, but Itachi got the distinct feeling that this silent exchange between them was some sort of gratitude instead of the usual simmering disapproval. He gave the man a warm, knowing smile.
He'd worried, for quite a while there, if he'd made a mistake in revealing Hidan's affections. He'd known he was inebriated heavily, and that his judgement was being affected by that. But something had possessed him, it was like, when he'd spotted Kisame guiding the man to the kitchen. He'd watched the doctor scan the room, knowing exactly who he was looking for. He'd seen the resentment in his eyes when he'd spotted Itachi instead. He was perfectly aware that the man was pissed beyond all reason. But the mere fact that he had come spoke volumes.
That was all he had to do, after all.
Kisame had re-emerged from the kitchen to get the doctor a drink, and Itachi had stopped him, his giddy excitement threatening to making him explode.
"What kind of mood is he in?" He'd asked his lover.
"Pissed all to hell. As usual." Kisame replied casually. "Let him simmer down and get a few drinks in him. He's just embarrassed, is all. Doesn't want people talking shit."
"I don't know why he hasn't realized that he's acting so far out of character yet."
"He's got a lot on his mind, babe."
"But he's never cared what anyone thought of him before. He should be far more worried about people calling him an ass than gossiping about his personal life."
"Well, in his defense, being a dick isn't listed as a sin in the bible. I mean, I couldn't care less, but you know how people are."
Itachi rolled his eyes. "What does religion have to do with this? You told me he was an athiest."
"Well he is, but the rest of the world isn't. When you have to cater to customers, it doesn't much matter where your own ideals lay, y'know?"
"I don't understand why he's so worried about that either. Humanity is far too dependant on instant gratification for him to lose much business from it. The closest hospital is half an hour away, people aren't going to forego that just because he happens to have homosexual tendancies, he is a good Doctor. And besides, he's been in good standings for almost twenty years, that won't count for nothing."
Kisame shrugged, reaching to grab a bottle Aberlour a'bunadh*, turning to Itachi for his imput on the drink he chose. He nodded, it was a very good choice, sweet and easy to get down, and likley to urge him into getting drunk, which would make all his plans easier.
"Maybe it's just something he's using as an excuse. Like, he hasn't had a relationship since college, I don't think. Maybe he's just scared as hell, but doesn't want to admit it." Kisame said, bending over to open the cooler beneath the bar and scoop some ice into a glass.
Itachi crossed his arms, chewing on his lip in a very Hidan-like fashion as he thought about it. That could be right, he was simply scared of rejection, exactly as Hidan was. But how could he put the man's mind at ease? Neither of them were going to admit their feelings, drunk or not, if they kept holding onto that fear.
He knew Hidan was feeling especially empowered and relaxed tonight, After being reminded of how much he was cared for, and how worthwhile his friendship was to those who stuck with it. When he found out Kakuzu was here, he would likley be upset with the man for showing up, reminding him of his troubles with him and ruining his mood. And naturally Dr. Hoku would likley get just as riled up when Hidan undoubtedly attacked him, and the two would end up storming away from each other like always, with nothing accomplished.
"Kisame..." He said thoughtfully.
"Hm?"
"I think... I'm just going to tell him."
"Tell him what?"
itachi stared at him quizzically, "That Hidan likes him as well."
"But I thought-"
"I know, so did I. But if what you're saying is correct, and they're both terrified of being told no, then neither of them is going to take the first step. If I told Hidan, he still might not do anything, he's still intimidated by the doctor, after all. But Kakuzu might initiate some sort of... something. So long as he has the reassurement that he won't be rejected. Then he'll know one way or the other; if he does do something, Hidan will respond, if he doesn't, then nothing will happen. That way there are no wild cards, nothing for him to make excuses for."
"Well, I mean, he still has his business."
"But if he's just using that to cover his tracks, it won't matter." Itachi said, steeling himself. "I'm telling him. You bring his drink, then I need you back out here to keep an eye on things.
Kisame stared at him, amused about some unspoken joke, holding the glass and the bottle of scotch.
"What?"
Kisame chuckled and shook his head. "I was just thinking, I'd hate to get on your shit list."
Itachi smirked, gesturing for Kisame to go into the room first. "Then I suggest never pissing me off, Kisa. After you."
Itachi blinked himself back to the present, finally breaking eye contact with Dr. Hoku and following after Hidan. Just as he emerged into the big room, Tayuya was pushing a reluctant Kisame onto the stage. After she appeared to have him where she wanted him (or gave up trying to move his giant ass) she slipped around to snatch the microphone again, laughing somewhat breathlessly into it.
"OKAY!" She said, "It's my turn, motherfuckers. This is a little diddy you'll all like, a good little dance number. And Shark-dick here is gonna help me do the dude parts!" She said, gesturing with her entire arm to Kisame, who snapped out of his hesitation, his friendly personality sliding back into place as he gave a relaxed wave. The DJ, lookng as if he were chuckling to himself, handed him another microphone.
The ladies in the stand were of course in an uproar, each and every one of them having seen the 'bouncer' of this 'club' and letting their eyes linger just a little to long for Itachi's liking. Even now his eyes narrowed in annoyance.
Hidan meanwhile was in hysterics beside him, having lost all his composure when Tayuya stole his nickname for Kisame and said it in front of everyone. At first the Uchiha didn't understand what was quite so funny about it, until he realized that sharks were known to usually have two penis's.
His face burned in jealously and humiliation for Kisame's sake then, as he crossed his arms, aware that he resembled a pouting child, but far too upset to care. Kisame was the only person who could make his little ideas backfire on him so terribley...
"This is Katy Perry's newest hit!" Tayuya cried out, which released another roar of excitement. "Dark Horse*, Featuring Shark-dick playing the role of Juicy J! Hit it!" She snarled excitedly, pointing to the DJ.
"Don't embarrass me." She muttered to Kisame, with a toothy smile and an elbow nudge.
The music started, and Tayuya bounced into action, her voice bouncing over the sound system, confusing Itachi for a second, as it sounded exactly like the original's at first. Hidan had mentioned that the woman was some sort of musical prodigy, but he hadn't exactly taken him seriously
"I knew you weeeeere.. You were gonna come to me. And here you aaaaaare, But you better choose carefully. 'Cause I-I-I... I'm capable of anything... Of anything, And everything." She sang in perfect pitch, the minor differences between her voice and that of Katy Perry's barely noticiable.
"Make me your Aph-ro-diiiiiteeee. Make me your one and only. But do-o-on't make me your enemy ,Your enemy, Your enemyyyy." She said now, Dancing seductiveley and to Itachi's great aggrivation, really well, moving in a circle around Kisame as she did, and making Itachi's hands grab on tighter to his own forearms, teeth clenched.
Then she stopped and whirled, pointing out to the crowd, eyeing him now as the music changed it rhythem. "So you wanna play with magiiiic? Boy, you should know what you're fallin' , do you dare to do this? 'Cause I'm comin' at'cha like a daaark hooorse."
The door behind him opened just as she launched into the second verse of the refrain, amazing sound somehow exploding from her tiny body, blowing everyone in the audience away, except for Hidan, who was still grinning in wild entertainment.
He turned to regard Dr. Hoku, who came to stand next to him in much the same stance. They shared a glance, in which Kakuzu seemed to notice his raging jealousy, judging by the slight crook at the edge of his mouth. The man's bloodshot eyes flicked up toward the stage to regard his long-time friend being eye-humped by every woman on the makeshift dancefloor while Itachi seethed.
"And he'd been amused by Hidan's popularity..." The Doctor grumbled.
Itachi let it remain a rhetorical statement, as Kisame's part in the song was coming up, and he was dying to see how his boyfriend would perform. He'd obviously never heard the man sing before, though rapping wasn't really singing, in his opinion. He'd never heard him do either of the two, and was more than ready to witness it.
His eyes met Kisame's, and the man gave him a toothy grin, winking.
Well, he certianly got over his anxiety fast, hadn't he?
"Are you ready for, ready for!? The perfect storm, perfect stooorm!? 'Cause once you're mine, once you're miiiiiiine! Mm~mmm, there's no going back..." Tayuya said, and Kisame stepped forward on cue, not even having to look at the lyrics on the screen in front of the stage as he hunched slightly and moved his hands in the generic rapper's pose.
"She's a beast. I call her Karma. She'll eat your heart out, Like Jeffrey Dahmer. Be careful, Try not to lead her on. Shawty's heart was on steroids 'Cause her love was so strong!" He sing-songed, making another eruption of high-pitched squeals erupt from the audience, it had dwindled significantly since Hidan's performance, somthing itachi was grateful for. Though on the downside, those who remained were now far more intoxicated than they had been when Hidan sang. Which made them more unpredictable.
The albino himself had literally fallen to the floor in a fit of maniacle laughter as soon as Kisame had said the word 'Shawty', making Itachi scoff and roll his eyes. But he couldn't hide his own aroused excitement as seeing Kisame, his Kisame, do something so... so...
So damn sexy.
"You may fall in love when you meet her. If you get the chance, you better keep her. She swears by it but if you break her heart, she turns cold as a freezer. That fairy tale ending with a knight in shining armor. She can be my Sleeping Beauty, I'm gon' put her in a coma."
He'd started moving around the stage in overexaggerated movements, trying to be funny, Itachi thought, but just making himself look more desireable as he embarrassed himself willingly for everyone else's entertainment.
His eyes of course, never left Itachi's but to glance around to make sure he wouldn't trip over anything, always coming back to reassure the Uchiha that he had nothing to be jealous about, with that mischevious but comforting smile of his.
"Woo! Damn I think I love her. Shawty so bad. I'm sprung and I don't care. She got me like a roller coaster, turn the bedroom into a fair. Her love is like a drug, I was try'na hit it and quit it. But Uchiha's* so dope, I messed around and got addicteeeeed."
"SO you wanna PLAY WITH MAGIC!?" Tayuya jumped in, giving him a pat on the back and pointing this 'Uchiha' out in the crowd while literally bouncing with excitment. "Boy you should KNOW what you're fallin' fo-or. Baby, do you DARE to do this? 'Cause I'm comin' At'cha like a daaark hoooorse."
Itachi, eyes wide as saucers, blushed furiously, warring between emotions. He didn't know whether to be extremley flattered, extremley embarrassed, or extremley proud.
Either way each one of them was in the extremes.
Kisame raised his hand in a sign-off as Tayuya finished the song, and he handed the mic back to the DJ, then almost jogged from the stage down the side of the floor over to where his boyfriend stood. Every eye in the room watched him, and when he moved to Itachi, simulatneous sounds of interest, disappointment, and excitment murmured through them. Part of him mentally flipped the women off as he realized a lot of them most likley didn't even realize he was a man, expecially with the help of those lyrics.
"You ruined my revenge scheme!" Itachi whined, aware of all the eyes on him and trying desperatley to keep his composure despite the sudden overwhelming urge to throw himself at the grinning man, aside from the lingering anger, that is. "You were supposed to embarrass yourself."
"Hah. You think I wasn't? I already told you though, I'm humbled to be bested by you."
There was a collective 'Awwee' that rose around the room. Hidan made a gagging noise beside him, having finally regained control of himself after Kakuzu removed himself from the spotlight that bounced off Itachi to drag the idiot back to his feet. At this point he smacked Hidan upside the head, probably just to keep him from attracting attention, the Uchiha thought.
The song had ended and there was utter silence now, everyone waiting in anticipation. Some of the males of the crowd rolled their eyes, and moved to leave the dancefloor, if not the party itself. Itachi shifted nervously, wondering just what the hell Kisame was trying to pull here. Their relationship was supposed to be a secret, after all. He didn't want the poor man to suffer the way he had through most of his life. For their own reasons, the raven-hair supposed, someone who didn't like his sexuality had long ago restarded the rumors that he would sleep with just about anything that would have him. Every so often someone restarted them again, and he didn't want people to think any less of Kisame simply for being in a relationship with him.
"Oh my fucking God..." Tayuya droned into the microphone. "Fucking kiss him already. Jesus."
A gasp echoed through the crowd, and Itachi eyes Kisame, questioning.
"I'd do what she says." he laughed, nodding his head toward the pinkette still on stage despite the DJ beginning to pack up his equipment. "She's kind of scary when she yells."
itachi's face broke into a smile despite him, and he rolled his eyes, shrugging away his doupts, before doing as he'd wanted to before. he took a few leaping steps and jumped gracefully into the man's arms, ignoring the sounds of Hidan's overexaggerated gagging.
Kisame caught him, the scene looking like something straight out of a movie as he situated the smaller man with ease into a standing-straddle. And simultaneously they leaned in toward each other, Itachi freeing his hands to grasp Kisame's cheeks.
Those that didn't dismiss themselves screamed, whisteled, meow-ed, and all other manner of inappropriate noises at the act. Several flashes went off, but the two men ignored them. Breaking from their kiss to put their foreheads together.
"You're not afraid of what people will say?" Itachi whispered.
"Hey, you keep saying Kakuzu has nothing to worry about. Why the hell should we?"
Itachi chuckled, nuzzling his nose with his lovers. "Right. They're all juveniles anyway...
"ALRIGHT DRUNK BITCHES, I think this party's pretty much over, call your mommies and rides and get the fuck out." Tayuya's loud voice demanded.
Kisame put Itachi down, and he brushed himself off, as if he'd somehow gotten dirty.
"You two make me wanna puke." Hidan muttered, making Itachi shoot him a glare that said 'Like you have any room to talk." In a mature display, Hidan stuck his tongue out and flipped him off, pushing back through the door into the kitchen, announcing that he was ready to leave as he did so. Kakuzu followed him without so much as a glance.
"You know..." Itachi siad, tracing around some invisible pattern on Kisame's shirt with his index finger. "I could probably talk the people who help me set up into cleaning up for us." Kakuzu said Hidan could ride with him and he'd help him to the apartment. I'd like to go with you, if that's alright..." He gave a seductive smile, not making his intentions obvious but not hiding them either.
If Kisame picked upon it, he made no reaction, only giving the younger man a warm smile and reaching to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear. "Well hurry then. I'm sober enough to drive, so long as you don't tell Kakuzu on me."
"Deal." Itachi said quickly, rushing off to catch the volunteers before they left.
Itachi Uchiha was never one to be conceited, but damn if he didn't always managed to pull Miracles from his ass. He marked the night off as a big fat success, and left the rest to fate. He and his wallet needed a break after all this.
-o-
A/N-
THE END!
NNOOONO IT'S NOT I'M JUST KIDDING! Don't freak out and kill me. Haha.
Really though, for some reason I'm drawing a blank as to what more to do. If anyone has ideas, even vague ones, pm me. Credit will go to you for helping me out, of course.
Well? How was the Kakuhida scene? Still think I'd be good at writing porn? Lol, I still haven't decided... maybe later. Or maybe next chapter? O.O DOES ITACHI GET LUCKY!? I'M TAKING BETS!
Yeah, Sorry for teasing you, I really don't know. I don't plan things, I guess you'll just have to wait and see.
Romanticist* -Is that a word? I feel like it's a word but I wasn't sure and I'm too lazy to look it up. You know what I mean though.
Aberlour a'bunadh* - That would be the name of the scotch Kuzu was drinking. Yes, it's a real brand. And yes, it's amazing.
Dark horse* By Katy Perry ft. Juicy J. -The song Tayuya and Kisa sang, in case you didn't catch that. Not one of my favorites, (Though I do like it) but as with all the random little comedic scenes in this story, somehow fluffyisemo and I ended up having some conversation about how it was totally a FYA specific KisaIta song. And since Hida had done Karaoke... well, I couldn't resist. Tayuya did Itachi's half though, because even wasted out of his mind, I couldn't see Itachi doing it.
'But Uchiha's* so dope, I messed around and got addicted. '- Kisame did a little improv. Don't fucking sue me. Gawd.
So, I did draw Tayuya, but unfortunatly my son threw my fucking phone in the toilet a few days ago, an dfor some reason I can't find the software for my scanner, so I can't post it until I find some way to get it intot he computer. Damn my traditional style. ._.
But, anyway, enough blabbering. I love you all, forgive typo's, and of course, don't forget to reviewwwww...
See ya next chapterrrrrr!