Disclaimer : I do not own FFVII, Crisis Core, Advent Children, or any of the characters that you recognise. As much as I love these guys, they belong to those other guys.

Chapter 19 : Sharing Is Caring

"You're going to ask me about Cloud, aren't you?"

"Bingo." Reno took another drink, keeping his eyes on the ceiling. He figured if he wasn't watching her, she might actually answer. To his surprise, she started to speak after a few moments deliberation.

"We tried. We really did. To live as a family. Me, Cloud, Marlene, Denzel. We even tried dating, whenever Cloud had some time off from deliveries. You can imagine how often that happened. It ended up being mostly... physical..." She said the word quietly, her eyes flicking to see Reno's reaction. She saw the corner of his mouth twitch but he just took another drink and kept staring at the ceiling as if the wooden beams were the most interesting thing he'd ever seen. "Towards the end I noticed he was mostly just doing it because he thought that's what I wanted. I pretended it was for a while, too. But the fact is, he's never going to get over Aeris." Tifa winced slightly. Aeris had been her best friend, but she couldn't help but feeling a twinge of jealousy even now at the way the Ancient had captured Cloud's heart in a way she never could. "I know he loved me. You can't go through what we did and not have love for each other. But he doesn't love me that way. And I think something finally clicked in me. That was a few months ago and I finally started feeling a bit better about the whole thing. So, I got away for a week. The kids are spending a week with Barret looking after the bar, and I gave myself time to just try and be me again. That sounds sooo lame." She finished with a groan. Reno couldn't help the laugh that burst from his lips as she said it.

"Hey, I said nothin'." His hands lifted in defense and Tifa smiled.

"You didn't have to. You were thinking it. Hell, I was thinking it."

"Alright, ya got me. Still surprised ya told me anythin' at all." Reno admitted. Tifa looked contemplative for a few moments.

"I haven't really spoken to anyone about it. But I guess with you I know you're not directly involved so as to be biased, but you know the situation. I dunno." She mumbled, he attention seemingly focused on removing the beer label, even as she remembered what Reno had told her the night before. His voice snapped her back to reality.

"I'm a little biased."

"What?"

"I think Spike is a fuckin' idiot for lettin' a girl like you go." He answered honestly. Tifa whirled to face him, her eyes wide. He was no longer tilted back against the couch. Instead, his body was slightly turned towards her, the arm outstretched along the back of the couch a lot closer than she remembered. Tifa swallowed as her her mouth dried up. She could see a spark in his eye that she remembered from last night.

"I don't..."

"Teef..." Reno said with a sigh. Her chest warmed a little as he used that nickname. "I know I barely know ya, despite everything. But I can honestly say the past 24 hours have been a blast for me. You're actually a lot of fun, not just counting when yer tanked up on whisky." He grinned slightly, joking to try and take the seriousness out of what he was saying. "And you don't even like me that much. But we've done a lot of laughin' and some other...fun stuff..." He wiggled his eyebrows and Tifa rolled her eyes, a faint smile appearing. "So if that's what spendin' time with ya is like for a guy ya only just started to not hate, I can only imagine what yer like to someone yer actually in love with." He finished, watching her to see how she would react. The warmth in Tifa's chest was now accompanied by a flutter. Reno had just been actually genuinely nice about her. Reno! She wondered if those beers weren't super strength and she was actually drunk and hearing things. It he was drunk and unaware of what he was saying.

Reno was still watching her as she chewed on her bottom lip, staring down at her bottle. His face fell. Was that out of line? I was just bein' honest. He wondered. He was about to speak again when Tifa suddenly put her hand on top of his, her fingers squeezing his gently. She looked up at him, and his own eyes flicked between her hand and her face.

"Thanks... Reno." A small smile appeared on her lips and she put her hands back in her lap before taking a long drink. Reno found his hand suddenly felt cold where hers had rested on top of his. He shook his head and drained the rest of his drink.

"Right, final question. This one is a biggy. Maybe even bigger than the last two." Reno lowered his voice, spreading his arms out wide to emphasis his point. Tifa raised an eyebrow as she watched him. "I'm serious. This is deep. Gelnika deep."

"Oh gods, what is it?"

"Do ya wish we'd... Y'know." Reno made a crude gesture with his fingers. Tifa let out a disgusted groan and flung the balled up label she had in her hand. She instantly regretted it as he caught it and his eyes widened. "Oh ho I am SO takin' that as a hell yeah!"

"Thats not what I meant!" Tifa spluttered, blushing so much that her ears turned red. She'd managed to keep the blushing to a minimum today but it seems that streak was over. Reno was laughing now, tossing the small ball in the air and catching it again, his smirk impossibly wide. He was taunting her with that label now. She watched the little ball for a few moments before putting her beer down on the table and holding her hand out towards him. "Give me it."

"You want me to give it to you?"

"Yes!"

"What, now?"

"Yes, now! Why would..."

"What, right here on the couch?"

"What do you-RENO!" Tifa finally clicked what he was getting at and she lunged at him, trying to wrestle the small ball out of his hand. Reno extended his long arm well out of her reach, laughter practically rolling out of him now. Tifa clambered over him, reaching for his outstretched hand as he practically vibrated with laughter beneath her, the blanket Tifa had been under trapped between them and clinging to various limbs. She finally grabbed hold of his hand and Reno shifted underneath her, knocking her legs out behind her and causing her to practically fall right on top of him. She cursed silently. How does he do that?! One minute I'm sitting under the blanket, the next he's got me straddling him! She grumbled inwardly, her cheeks flushing with colour once again. Reno's laughter had died down slightly as he stared up at her, his eyes shining with mirth and mischief. Tifa thought there might actually be more mischief than Mako in him. She noticed her hand was still curled around his, her other arm propping her up slightly. Reno's free arm held his beer out over the edge of the couch almost lazily, one of his knees bent so that she was pressed between him and the couch. She let go of his hand and pushed herself up off him slightly, still staring at him. His grin was still wide and playful, but there was different emotion clear in his eyes now. Tifa's eyes flickered to his mouth as he slowly, obviously, ran his tongue along his top lip. She couldn't help but let out a small noise that was part annoyance, and part aroused. Hearing herself, she pushed herself off him completely and sat back against the arm of the couch. Reno stayed reclined, one arm folding behind his head as the other brought his beer to his mouth.

"Sayin' one thing but then actin' the opposite. Do you even know what you want, Lockhart?" He drawled before taking a drink. Tifa attempted to the pull the blanket back around herself, feeling slightly vulnerable, but it was still half tangled round Reno's legs. She instead grabbed a cushion and held it against her chest and stomach, as if to shield herself. "Relax, I won't jump yer bones unless ya ask real nicely."

"Ugh, you're so eloquent."

"Damn fuckin' right." He winked at her as he drained the last of his drink. Tifa couldn't help but notice he had drank a lot. His earlier comment about drinking when he wasn't sleeping came back to her mind. She shifted slightly where she sat.

"Reno?"

"Yeah?"

"You said you drink because you can't sleep. And earlier this morning...in bed..." Her blushed returned "You mentioned not sleeping great either. Does... does it have something to do with why you left Midgar?"

Reno froze, the cheeky and cheerful look on his face disappearing, and a darkness came across his eyes. He sat up and leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. Tifa couldn't help herself as she leaned closed to him, tilting herself slightly so she could look at his face.

"Reno?"

"This doesn't leave this cabin." He said, his tone a clear warning as his eyes flicked to meet hers. Tifa realised she was holding her breath. She let it go as she nodded. Reno sighed and put his empty beer bottle down.

She's been honest with me. Suppose the least I can do is do the same.

They sat in silence for what seemed like forever to Tifa. Reno was still hunched forward on the edge of the couch, his shoulders tense and his eyes fixated on nothing in particular. Tifa heard him take a deep breath before he started to speak.

"Y'know how I told you they had to put me into one of those Mako tubes after the fight at the pillar? Well, it doesn't just give ya crazy strength and glow sticks for eyes. It also gives you fuckin' crazy nightmares. 'Night terrors', is the name the doc gave them actually. They started off sparse enough, mebbe one a month. I just kinda ignored them, though I scared the shit out of Rude when we were on a mission that required staying in one cramped hotel room." Reno chuckled darkly. "When I woke up, he actually had his gun on me. I dunno if it was to put me out of my misery or because he was actually scared I'd hurt him. Really crazy shit. So anyway, you know how life went after that. We did our best to hunt you guys down, and at the same time, they started getting more frequent and more intense. I ain't scared of much, yo, but I woke up screamin' more often than I care to remember. It almost made me feel sorry for Sephiroth, cause if that's what he went through then no wonder he went fuckin' nuts." He rubbed his chin, the colours in his eyes flashed slightly, almost like there was a pulsing light behind his irises. Tifa searched his eyes, watching them spark and flare, but didn't speak. She didn't want to stop him now that he was actually speaking about it. Shaking his head slightly, he started speaking again.

"When Meteor was summoned, I basically went a bit haywire. I refused to sleep, I just stayed awake for days. One week I think I got about 2 hours of shut eye. I was totally frazzled, but hell if I was goin' to sleep. It got so bad Tseng actually sent me on vacation. In the middle of chasing down you guys. An actual fucking holiday. He sent Rude and Elena with me. He said we all deserved a break, but I know the boss. He wouldn't give all of his Turks time off at the same time when we were on the middle of a mission. Tseng was still laid up himself at the time too, which made it worse. They were sent to keep an eye on me, make sure I didn't do anythin' stupid. I was starting to hallucinate with the lack of sleep, talkin' to folk who didnt exist. Think he was worried I was gonna follow someone who wasn't there off a cliff." Reno shook his head again, and tilted his head towards Tifa, a wry grin on his face. "He would rather have three of us on holiday for a week than lose one of us for good. We didn't have the numbers we used to have back in the day."

"Did it help?"

"Taking a break? Yeah, it helped a lot. As soon as I stopped rushin' around and fightin' I managed to sleep a little better. Still not great, couple of nightmares, but nothin' too traumatising. When we got back to Midgar though they started again. I thought I was I gonna go insane. Tseng started keepin' me in on paperwork duty. I was a liability in the field. The last time I was out was when we ran in to you guys in the tunnels. I was actually relieved when we didn't actually have to fight 'cause I reckon Chocobo Head woulda finished me off." Reno tilted his head back and closed his eyes. "I reckon I woulda welcomed it by that point, mind you." Tifa couldn't take her eyes off him. In that moment, she could almost forget that Reno was a trained killer, one of the toughest human opponents she'd ever fought against. Right now he just looked tired, like he was exhausted just by telling her about it. His eyes opened but he kept staring straight ahead. They sat in silence for a bit. Tifa wasn't sure whether to reach out for him or whether to stay where she was. She didn't know if he wanted to tell her any more. She raised a hand to reach for him just as he let out a long breath with a sigh. She froze, not wanting to distract him. She was rewarded with more of his tale.

"Time just didn't exist anymore. I started hallucinatin' again, seeing things comin' after me even when I was awake. I almost didn't notice fuckin' Meteor coming to flatten Midgar. I still dunno how I helped clear the slums. I just remember wakin' up in a temporary hospital and being told Midgar was gone.

"Thing was, after that, they stopped again. The terrors or whatever the fuck they were. We helped to rebuild Edge and took care of Rufus. We were doin' good, actually helpin' people. It was weird but it's almost like slowin' down a little helped. I dunno, I ain't a fuckin' doc.

"Everything was hunky dory until the triplets showed up. The nightmares creeped back, and I started strugglin' to sleep again. I managed to get through the fight with those nut jobs but even when they'd gone, I still didn't feel right. About a week after they disappeared, shit reached breaking point. Rude and I were sharin' an apartment on the outskirts of Edge. I came to with my hands around his throat." Reno dropped his head and looked at his lap, his eyes narrow as he clenched and unclenched his fists. Tifa's hands slowly lifted to cover her mouth. Reno and Rude were partners. They probably shared more than even her and Cloud had, just through working together all day every day for so many years. There's only so much you could actually tell a person about yourself. Most of getting to know people was physically being in their presence. That's how Tifa felt, anyway. She felt her eyes beginning to water slightly and refused to blink, willing the tears not to fall. She had never heard pain in Reno's voice before, he was always cocky. But right now, the tone he spoke in almost broke her heart.

"He managed to get hold of the lamp beside his bed and he clocked me over the head with it. I woke up on the floor with him pinnin' me down, confused as fuck. He told me what had happened and I just got a flash of my hands around a neck, but it wasn't Rude's. I was hallucinating again, it was just this shapeless face but it was fuckin' terrifying. It made this unholy noise too. Can still hear it ringin' in my ears. That was the last straw. I had to get away from Midgar, from Edge. I nearly killed my fuckin' partner, who does that?" Reno practically growled, his fists clenched so tightly his knuckles were white. Tifa couldn't help but place her hand over his. He relaxed ever so slightly but his hands remained clenched tight. He made a small tsk sound before turning his head away from her.

"Turks gotta trust each other. We have each other's backs. What use is a Turk who may or may not kill his partner over a stupid fuckin' nightmare? Tseng wasn't gonna let me go, but I told him to give me a year, maybe two. If I didn't have a breakdown in that time, then I would come back."

"Have you had any more?" Tifa asked tentatively, almost scared to find out the answer. She couldn't imagine what it felt like to be scared of your dreams. She remember when she and Cloud fell into the lifestream and she had to help him find himself. That had been tough enough, but at least he had her with him. He hadn't been alone. Reno was alone in his own head. Reno gave her a noncommittal shrug.

"Eh. Once or twice. Hence why I tend to live outside of town. Only person I can hurt is myself that way. I still don't sleep too great, usually takes half a bottle of whisky at least so I can sorta pass out rather than fall asleep. It's weird, but havin' you sleeping next to me actually allowed me to sleep soundly for the first time in fuck knows how long." He kept his head turned away from her, but Tifa could see his ears turning red. She couldn't help the small smile that appeared on her lips as she gently squeezed his hand. Reno surprised her by bursting out into laughter. "How fuckin' pathetic, eh?"

"It's not pathetic. Not even a little." Tifa gripped him a little tighter as she leaned forward to try and catch his eye. She noticed he had closed his eyes at some point and before she could stop herself, she had reached up with her free hand to physically turn his face to meet hers. Reno opened his eyes when he felt her fingers on his jaw just in time to see Tifa lean forward and press her lips against his. His eyes widened in shock as he stared at her closed eyes, only inches from his. He noticed tear tracks down her cheeks. Reno lifted his hands to cradle her face, his thumbs wiping away the moisture on her cheeks as he closed his eyes. His heart pounded and his stomach felt like there was thousands of butterflies trying to escape. He hadn't opened up to anyone like that before. Even with Rude, although his ex-partner generally understood without Reno ever having to explain. He didn't know what had made him tell Tifa all that. Maybe because he felt like would actually get it? She'd been though hell herself. She had felt true fear too.

He felt her melt against him and he moved one arm around her waist, the other hand sliding up into her hair. She sighed softly against his mouth, her lips parting slightly. Reno slid his tongue slowly over her lips before deepening the kiss, pulling her even closer towards him. Tifa rose upon her knees, her hands sliding around his neck, her fingers teasing gently at the loose strands of hair that fell across his neck. She felt him growl low in his throat before it changed to a deep groan as Tifa pushed him back against the couch firmly, moving to straddle his lap as he moved his hands onto her lower back. She pressed herself against him as he slid his hands down over her rear, squeezing firmly. It was Tifa's turn to groan and gasp.

Reno's head spun. He had no idea where the sudden connection with Tifa had sparked from, but he needed her right now like he needed air. His heart ached with longing as he slid his hands back up so that he could pull her against him as tightly as he could, like he couldn't possibly get close enough to her. He couldn't help the soft moan that escaped his throat as she pulled back, her breaths coming hard and fast as they mingled with his. Her forehead rested against his, her large chocolate coloured eyes staring into his in a way like he felt she could see his soul. He brought one hand up to her cheek, his thumb rubbing back and forth over the smooth skin of her cheek. He couldn't help the smile that spread across his lips, and was relieved when she smiled back just as widely, her lips reddened with how hard she had kissed him. He shifted his hand and rubbed his thumb across her bottom lip slowly. Without so much as blinking, her eyes still firmly on his, Tifa slowly slipped her tongue out and over the top of his thumb before she closed her lips around it. Reno's eyes widened as she gently sucked on the tip of his thumb and he could not have held back the sound that came out of his mouth if he was paid a million Gil. It was halfway between a whimper and a groan. A soft purring noise seemed to radiate from Tifa's throat as she slowly, almost painfully slowly, released his thumb, but not before running her tongue over the rough fingertip once more. Reno grabbed her ass hard and she gasped as he leant forward almost whisper into her ear.

"Oh, Lockhart. You should not have done that."

AN ; Mega chapter is mega! I did have this split into two chapters but I didn't see the point really.

Okay. So obviously things are about to get rather steamy between our favourite redhead and Miss Lockhart. I have in fact written what happens next in all its lemony goodness. However. I do know that not everyone enjoys lemon and it would require me to put the rating up. I've done it in such a way that the entire chapter can be skipped by those not into it and they won't miss any storyline. I reckon you guys probably want it because let's face it, who doesn't enjoy a little smut? xD I will post both the next chapters together though so those who wish to skip it can do so!