A/N: Hey guys, this is my first little-fanfic in English, and I'm just posting because the marvellous Kuri333 helped me, although all the mistakes are mine, because I'm not English fluent... So thanks Kuri, very very much, and I hope you enjoy it.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything unfortunately.

"Dear John,

It's been so long since the last time we were together, and I can't possibly understand how or why it took me so long to write to you. I'm sorry, love.

Sean asked Miss Victoria to marry him. You would be so proud of our son, John. I know you never liked their romance, but Mr. Talbot gave his blessing happily, and Lady Mary... Well, you know her, she is accepting the changes of the world. I'm sure, love, you wouldn't be angry with Sean if you had seen his face when he told me he was marring her.

As for me, I keep going every morning to the Abbey. I can't stop thinking about those times when we used to make that path together. It's a lonely path and sometimes I wish I could just stay at our little cottage, our home, John, but I know you wouldn't like me brooding about life - you were always the brooder in our little family and I like to work there. There are so many memories of us, it was where everything started, I couldn't leave it behind.

Mr. Barrow has been a good butler and friend for me. He is the only one I can talk about the old times. He is a better man each day, and you should be proud of him. Some days ago, he told me that after everything that happened, he would have wanted to be like you: an honourable man. Those were his words.

After the death of Lady Grantham, Phyllis left the Abbey. She doesn't write so frequently, neither Mr. Molesley. Everyone has gone, John, and I stayed behind with my memories. It hurts me to think about the happy times we lived there, the conversation at the servants' hall, Mrs. Patmore's dinners, Mr. Carson's orders, tea time with Mrs. Hughes, I miss all that. But what I miss most is you, John.

I miss you when I wake in the morning with your side of the bed cold, I miss you when I walk to the Abbey by myself, I miss you you when I have no one to talk to at work, I miss you when Sean tells me excitedly about his day, I miss you when I see your armchair empty, and I miss you while I write these words. I miss you terribly, my dear, and I don't know how long I want to be here without you.

I don't want to disappoint you and I must be here for Sean, but now he is getting married, he will leave soon. They are thinking about live on London after the wedding, Sean wants to finish his studies and Miss Victoria is helping Lady Edith with the magazine. They will make a happy life there.

Oh, John, how can I be alone in this cottage with yours memories hunting me? I know Sean doesn't want to leave me alone, and I said to him that I'm not alone. He doesn't believe me, he thinks I'm just saying that you are still here with me so he won't feel guilty about leaving. But it is true. I feel you everywhere, I know you didn't leave this house, not yet. We arrived here together, we will leave here together. You just have to be patient, John, I want to see Sean married first. Then I will be ready to meet you. Until there I will keep writing these letters for you, my love. Because all I have done in this life is for you, and it will always be.

With all my love,

Forever yours,

Anna Bates.

January 27th, 1954"

Later that day, Anna found herself in front of John's grave. Her hands were shaking and tears fell from her eyes as she read the letter out lout. She stood there brooding and before she left, she placed the white envelope besides the purple flowers she brought to him.

John would never be dead in her heart.

A/N: I choose the name "Sean" because it means "God's gracious gift" and it's also the Irish form of John.

I hope you liked, I would love to know what you thought about it, and I may write more one or two letters, depend if my not-fluent-English will allow me or not.