"Hurry the fuck up, asshole, or all the good stuff will be picked over!"
Zoro dug his hands deeper into the pockets of his denim jacket and tried to keep the vein in his forehead from exploding. Living with Luffy and that demonic cook for the past few weeks had been a bit more difficult than he had anticipated. Luffy was all right, only annoying every once in a while, but Zoro was a patient man for the most part. The kid was good for a laugh, and his stories were dumb but amusing. Sure he was a little slow and had nothing of an attention span to speak of, but, well, Zoro had lived with worse.
Like the fucking dart-brow.
Zoro had searched through his entire memory of shitty roommates and neighbors and could not come up with a single one of them who pissed him off even half as much as this asshole he was living with now did. Skinny bastard was the most infuriating person he'd ever had the displeasure of seeing on a daily basis, with only one possible exception, but he'd been younger then, and he'd actually had respect for the only girl who could kick his ass. But this fucker…he just lived to piss Zoro off.
Dragging him to some shitty outdoor market to serve as a pack-mule was a prime example. It wasn't too far away from the apartment; only a couple blocks up and hang a left on Broadway, but it was starting to get cooler outside, and Zoro wasn't a huge fan of the fall, and he pretty much despised winter. Mostly 'cuz he hated shivering, but he hated sweaters and shit even more, so he tended to get pretty cold. Zoro hated being cold.
He couldn't start work 'til November. Two months from now. Which meant he wouldn't have enough money to leave before the first snow.
New York. In winter. With—
"I said hurry the fuck up! I'm not looking for your ass if you get lost!"
Zoro growled low, hands curling into fists that he longed to slam into the side of that stupid blonde head.
New York. In winter. With this unbelievable jackass.
Zoro kind of wanted to kill something.
And what made everything even worse; what pushed shit to the point of being nigh on unbearable, was that the curly bastard still – still – refused to buy any real booze. Water was fine, Zoro could live with that, but pop was getting old, and wine was for annoying, fruity fuck-cakes like the scrawny blonde. But whenever he tried to explain to the shit-cook what a goddamned moron he was, it always devolved into a fight, which was fun, but it didn't make any booze magically appear in the fridge.
The asshole said he could get booze when he got a job and used his own damn money.
So that meant New York, in winter, with this unbelievable jackass, and he didn't even have the luxury of heavy drinking to pass the time.
There was no doubting it. This was definitely hell.
"Hey Sanji!" Luffy yelled, despite the fact that he was nearly walking on the bastard's heels. "Can we get meat? Lots of meat? Like last time? It was really good! I WANT STEAK!"
"Calm the fuck down! If you embarrass me again I'll kick your ass, shitty-strawhat-boy!"
"Oi, don't make fun of Hat, curly-eyebrow!"
"The fuck did you say, asshole!"
Feeling a headache coming on, Zoro opted to simply ignore the two, staring at the cracked, grey concrete as it passed under his boots and feeling the unavoidable twinge of irritation at getting himself stuck in this piss-poor situation. He supposed he'd been in worse predicaments, but from his current perspective, he'd really rather just grab up all his shit and fucking walk somewhere. Didn't matter where, just as long as it was way the hell away from New York and the shitty-cook. Anywhere else, and he was sure he'd be in a much better mood.
Zoro growled, glaring at the sidewalk again. It felt like weakness to be so angry about things he couldn't really change at the moment, but it didn't make him feel any less homicidal. He gritted his teeth, fists curling tighter in his jacket pockets; whatever dared to cross his path was going to get fucking pummeled. He needed a punching bag in the worst way…
Suddenly a body came flying across Zoro's vision, landing in a heap right in front of him, followed by the incensed cry of, "Do you think I was born fucking yesterday!? Get the fuck outta here!"
For about two seconds Zoro thought the gods – that he didn't believe in anyway – had granted his wish of a sap to take his aggression out on, until the body started moving, and Zoro realized it was actually a kid. Literally. He looked younger than Luffy. So the honorable swordsman stayed his rage, blinking bemusedly at the scruffy boy trying to pull himself off the ground. A large traveling pack came soaring through the air as well, crashing to the concrete right beside the kid, and he jumped like a frightened mouse. A door slammed shut to Zoro's right.
The kid stood up, slowly wiped his pants off and ran the sleeve of a grungy hoodie under his nose a few times before grabbing hold of the bag and attempting to hoist it over a narrow shoulder. He really was about as scrawny as he seemed; the gigantic pack was obviously too much for him, and the kid over-balanced, tottering straight into Zoro's chest. His hands immediately went up to steady the boy.
"S-sorry about that," the kid muttered, twitching his shaggy brown hair out of his eyes. "Um…thanks."
"What're you up to, kid?"
"N-nothing! Just…just trying to find a place to live…" The kid trailed off, eyes darting around and shoulders hunched slightly. He could not have looked guiltier if he were confessing to the murder of a small village. Zoro sighed; why was it always him?
"All right, let's have it. What did you do?"
"I didn't do anything!" the brown-haired boy cried, looking a little hysterical and close to tears. "Really I didn't! But everyone thinks I did! I'm just looking for a place to stay! Honest!"
Zoro rolled his eyes at his own fate, and then reached out, lifting the pack off the boy's shoulders and dragging it with him to the nearest stoop. He sat down with the pack next to him, nodding his head at the spot beside him. The shocked boy followed without question, like a lost puppy.
"So. What's the story?"
The kid shifted slightly on the stone step, eyes fixed on his worn sneakers.
"I'm…I'm a med student at NYU, and I need somewhere to stay. I can't afford on-campus living, or a dorm, so I was looking for a cheap apartment I could rent that's kinda close to the campus."
"You're a med student?" Zoro asked, raising an eyebrow. "Aren't you kinda young to be in college?"
"I graduated early from high school," the boy said, hands twisting awkwardly in the sweater that was much too big for him. "So my…my guardian…she's a doctor, a really, really good one, and she got me enrolled in NYU as soon as she could."
"So why don't you live with her, then?"
The kid sighed a little, looking extremely tired. "She said she wanted me to grow up and be a man…that I needed to get more experience on my own, 'cuz she wasn't always gonna take care of me."
Zoro nodded, watching the boy silently.
"But," he went on, shoulders drooping slightly, "No one'll let me stay anywhere. They don't wanna be responsible for me, because I'm not eighteen yet. I didn't really have anywhere to sleep last night…"
Zoro's jaw clenched slightly, even though he knew this kid could very well be taking him for a ride. But one look at those exhausted, sad-as-hell eyes, and Zoro knew this kid hadn't ever told a lie in his life.
And that fact was probably why he now found himself ruffling the boy's mop of brown hair, and saying, "Oi, kid. Real men don't give up."
The boy turned those big, watery eyes on Zoro, and he suddenly realized he'd made a huge fucking mistake. And when the boy gurgled what was probably a tiny sob under his breath, and swung his skinny arms around Zoro's midsection, the swordsman cursed himself for being such a goddamn idiot. But it wasn't until he felt the cool tear drops fall from the boy's eyes and land on the cotton T-shirt he wore underneath the jacket that Zoro truly understood how royally fucked he was.
This was not good. This was very much not good.
Because if Zoro had any serious weakness, it was kids in shitty situations. And this one was in a pretty fucking shitty situation.
"O-oi. Kid." Zoro took his shoulders and tried to pry him off as gently as he could, but the boy simply clung on tighter. "Hey. Knock it off. Kid? Oi!"
"Shitty moss-head, didn't I tell you I wouldn't go looking for you if you got lost?" came the grating, repulsive sound of the last person Zoro really felt like seeing just then.
Or ever.
The skinny blonde stormed over, puffing smoke furiously into the crisp air and looking mighty pissed, which did sort of amuse Zoro.
"We were half way there when Luffy realized your stupid ass was no where in sight! What the fuck about, 'Hurry the hell up,' do you not…fucking…get…?"
Sanji slowed to an anti-climactic stop just in front of them, frowning in slight confusion at the kid still clinging to the swordsman, and an awkward silence followed as he obviously didn't know what to say, and Zoro figured he ought to savor this moment, 'cuz times like these were pretty damn rare.
"Oi, what are you guys doing? I'm starving to death and Sanji won't cook if we don't buy food!" Luffy roared, never one to be left out of anything. He too jogged over to the stoop where the rest were gathered, and halted when he realized he didn't recognize one of them. His round, dark eyes looked from the boy, to Zoro, to Sanji, and then back to Zoro again.
"Who's the kid?" he asked, pointing at the boy who was now gripping Zoro's jacket and trying to hide behind him.
"Dunno his name," Zoro said. "He's gonna move in with us, okay?"
The boy choked.
Sanji choked.
Luffy just laughed and said, "Okay!"
"Wait, hold on just a minute!" the cook cried, waving his arms. They all turned to look at him. "We don't have any more rooms. They're all full up. Where's this kid gonna sleep?"
"So we'll buy a cot and he'll bunk with me," Zoro said, digging a finger in his ear, unconcerned.
"But…but--"
Sanji broke off, his eyes locking with the young boy's, and his next complaint died on his tongue. He sighed, spitting out the butt of his cigarette.
"What's your name, kid?"
The boy swallowed nervously. "M-my dad named me Tony Chopperman, but everyone calls me Chopper."
"You look like a vegetarian, Chopper."
The kid blushed and squirmed a bit next to Zoro. "Y-yeah, I am. How did you know?"
"Hmmm…" Sanji pulled out a fresh cigarette and lit it up with a flick of his lighter. "We'll have to pick up some eggplant at the market…"
Zoro raised an eyebrow as the blonde turned on his heel, marching off down the street again, completely ignoring the kid's question. That was…unexpected at best. He figured the spindly prick would be just as vehemently against the boy moving in as he had been with Zoro, but apparently even the shitty-cook had a moment of conscience every now and then. He just shrugged it off. The bastard was still a bastard, in his mind. Nothing was gonna change that.
"Um…" a quiet voice squeaked from somewhere near his shoulder. Zoro looked down at the kid, who was biting his lip and staring firmly at the swordsman's jaw, too scared to look any higher.
"Th-…thank you. Really. I…" His fists twisted Zoro's jacket, and he bit his lip harder, tears threatening to spill again. "I…I really, really…"
Zoro ruffled his hair again. "Chopper, right?" he asked.
The boy blinked, tears running down his cheeks as his eyes finally met the older man's. He nodded, looking sort of awed and speechless.
"Let's go. That blonde asshole can get really irritating if we make him wait."
More tears streamed down Chopper's face, but he smiled wide. "Okay!"
"YAY!" Luffy cheered, startling both of them. "LET'S GO! I WANNA EEEEEEEEEEAT!!!!"
"Will you assholes hurry the fuck up!? I'm not waiting anymore!"
Hey again! Trying to get these first seven or eight chapters out. They pretty much comprise the ground-work chapters. Then everything after that starts picking up the plotline. And if seven-to-eight-odd chapters of set-up seems a bit excessive, you have no idea how massive this thing is gonna get. My only hope is for none of you to get too utterly bored with this story! I promise it'll be good!!! Also, genre was switched from Romance/Humor to Romance/General, when I realized the MASSIVE AMOUNT OF ANGST that will shortly become a huge selling point. And, if you're looking for Hurt/Comfort, be prepared for a shock. Zoro has fluffly tendencies, but none where Sanji's concerned. He's really just a dick. But in the best way possible! X) Thanks for the reviews!!!!!