A/N Thank you all for the comments and reviews. It was a rough ending. This chapter picks up right where we left off, with Beth's slap.

When she slapped him it was like he suddenly realized what he was doing, "Beth, oh my god, I'm sorry, please." He tried reaching out for her.

She was out of the bed and on her feet, "NO! You don't get to touch me! I can't even believe what just happened!" She had tears but more than being sad she was angry.

"Beth please I'm sorry, I don't know what the fuck, I just can't take the thought of you leaving me for him. I love you, I just wanted that one last time."

She wasn't any less furious, but she was confused. "What in the world are you talking about? Leave you? For who exactly?"

He was up, pulling on his jeans, and he told her how he felt about Spencer and his belief that there was something going on between them.

Now her anger reached even higher levels. "How could you say that to me? Is that what you think? That some guy comes along and I just walk away from you, from Carl? Well I guess I know who you're comparing me to, and it seems pretty obvious now you're not over her. Worse than that, you think I'm the same person she was. And what about you Rick Grimes? Giving me the cold shoulder for days? I was certain you'd fallen out of love with me. Now I feel like you never really did love me. Well don't worry about it anymore because I'm leaving!"

She grabbed her suitcase from the closet randomly throwing in clothes. "Please Beth no, please don't leave me. I'll make it up to you. I'm so sorry Sweetie, please."

She slipped on a pair of jeans, an oversized sweatshirt, she had her tennis shoes in one hand, her suitcase in the other. "I'm not your Sweetie anymore, and I don't know that you could ever make up for this. I don't even feel like I want you to try. How could I ever trust you with my heart again?"

And no amount of begging could sway her. He stood on the little front porch, tears in his eyes and he watched her drive away.

He was still half drunk, but he was sober enough to realize exactly what had just happened, he'd just lost the only woman he ever loved.

He paced the yard, paced around the house, knew he had to sober up. He went to the bathroom, tripped over the trash can, spilling everything from it and onto the floor.

He saw the box first, those three bold letters told him what it was. Then he found the test itself. Then he sat down on that bathroom floor with his head in his hands and he cried, cried like he was certain he had never cried before.

A block from the house she pulled over to the side of the rode. She did what she always did when she was confused, or troubled, or hurt, she called Maggie. "Calm down Beth, I can't understand a word you're saying. What the hell happened? Do you need me to come to your house?"

She managed to get the words out, "No Maggie, you can't, can I come there?"

"Of course you can, do you want Glenn to come get you?"

"No, I can drive."

"Well be careful, we'll be waiting."

Maggie wanted her to drink a glass of wine and Beth had to tell her why she couldn't. Maggie wanted to be excited, she was excited, but Beth wasn't excited, so that would have to wait. Hopefully whatever was going on would be resolved quickly.

Maggie poured herself a hardy glass and said, "Okay Bethie, let me have it."

Glenn knew whatever it was it was bad, so he was 'hiding out' in his office. His cell phone beeped with a text from Rick, "I know no one wants to talk to me right now. But please just let me know Beth got there okay. Thanks." He'd known where she'd go first.

Glenn had no idea what the hell was going on, and he texted back, "Yeah, she's fine. Just talking to Mags."

Rick was emotional, he was heartbroken and he was ashamed. What the hell had come over him? He loved Beth, treasured her. He never would have believed he could ever hurt her, ever act like such a total bastard. He needed to talk to someone but he couldn't drive, he thought about it for just a minute and then he called Daryl.

Daryl was that guy, the guy you could call any time and he'd help you out. Twenty minutes later Daryl was there. Rick didn't hold back, shit he and Daryl had known each other forever, he was his best friend, and he needed a friend.

Daryl was sipping from the flask he carried with him while he listened. Rick had hoped for a little sympathy and understanding from his friend when he was done telling the story. What Rick got was, "Man Rick, when you fuck up you fuck up like a damn champ. Shit, how could ya be such an asshole ta yer wife? Didn't it occur to ya ta just talk to her, ask her what the fuck? Then she coulda told ya you're a dumb sumbitch, which you are, and there ain't no one else. That woulda been that. And this sex thing. Goddamn, I can't even believe you'd act like that. I know you was drunk an all, but that ain't no excuse. Hell Merle told me when I's eleven years old that ya never take from a woman what she don't wanna give ya. Sad ta think that Merle's got higher morals than you, ain't it?"

"I know man, everything you're saying is the truth. If she hadn't slapped me when she did it would have gone way too far. I've never been more ashamed, never ever been sorrier for anything I've ever done. I don't know what I can do to make this right Daryl. How can I make her believe I love her, that it'll never happen again? Fuck man, I'm running blind here."

"I got no fuckin' idea," Daryl took a swallow from his flask, "If she was a man she'd a probably killed yer ass an this would be over, you'd be outta yer damn misery. But shit, you know what I know about women, nuthin'. I probably ain't the one ta give ya no advice, 'cept I will say one thing I noticed 'bout you n Beth. Every time the two a you has had trouble it's cuz ya don't just say what the fuck is botherin' ya. I thought I's the one that never told nobody nuthin', but you two make me seem like a damn open book." And he took another swig.

"Since Carl ain't home I'ma just crash in his room. Ya caused me ta get all drunked up now." And that was the only thing said that night that made Rick smile.

"Oh my gawd Bethie I am so sorry, I just can't even imagine Rick acting like that. I've seen the way the man is around you, he adores you, shit it's more than that, it's like he worships you. I just, oh man. I just wish I had the answer here."

"I do have something to say you probably don't want to hear right now, but you know me, I just call it like I see it. Beth, you may have had a little part in all of this blowing way out of proportion. I mean didn't you get the least bit suspicious when Rick started hanging around the bakery three times a day, sticking his tongue down your throat in front of everyone? His behavior does a one eighty and his wife doesn't notice, doesn't say anything? Or were you maybe, just a little, enjoying the fact that you and the hot baker were making him squirm?

And if you really thought maybe he didn't love you anymore, or was maybe angry, how come you didn't just ask him? It seems to me every time you two have a blow up it's because no one tells what they're feeling, or thinking, or wanting. You love each other why the hell can't you talk to each other?

I'm not excusing what he did, and I'm not telling you that you should forgive him. You have to make up your own mind and decide what you want. This whole situation just plain sucks. It would be bad if it was just you and Rick, but it's worse. It's you, Rick, Carl and Baby Grimes. Oh Bethie I'm just so sorry this happened. I'm sorry for all of you. God I wish you two would have just TALKED to each other, it would have made life so much easier."

Sunday Morning

He wanted to see her, he wanted to talk to her. But he was sure she wouldn't take his calls. He couldn't just go banging on Glenn and Maggie's door, they didn't need to be caught in the middle.

He was desperate, he asked Daryl if he'd please pick up Carl at Morgan's and take him for pancakes. Rick would pick him up later that afternoon, "Oh hell yeah, I could use a plate a pancakes an eggs, after we eat, I'll take the man out to do a little squirrel huntin', if that's okay."

"Thanks Daryl, I owe you brother."

"Ya don't owe me shit, just get yer head outta yer ass an make this right."

(((())))

Maggie could be a joker but she also had a very serious side, and Maggie insisted, "No more secrets Beth, look where that's gotten you so far. You don't have to tell Mama and Daddy exactly what happened, but you have to tell them Rick and Carl won't be joining us for Sunday dinner and that you two are having problems. They're going to be sad, they're going to be confused, but they're not going to be nosy. You need to call and tell them, and tell them we'll see them at church. I think we all need some serious prayers today."

Just as Beth knew they would be, Mama and Daddy were upset, not angry but sad and disappointed. And she hadn't even told them what had happened. Like Maggie said, they didn't ask. Mama did say, "Well if you can't, or won't, go home to your husband you come home with us after church today. You still have a room here." Not wanting to be a third wheel at Maggie and Glenn's, Beth agreed.

Oh my gosh, wait until Mama and Daddy find out about the baby.

She was standing out front on the lawn with her family, they were talking to friends from a neighboring farm before going in the church for services.

She absentmindedly glanced around and saw Rick standing by that big oak. He nodded, didn't smile, and she felt her face get so hot she knew it had to be tomato red.

She was shocked when her Daddy walked over and shook Rick's hand. And boy did she wish she knew what they were talking about.

"Son marriage isn't always easy, I know that from my own experience. I don't know what's happened between you and my daughter, and I probably don't want to know. Whatever it is, I hope you two will be able to work it out. For yourselves and for Carl."

"Thank you sir. It's all my fault I can assure you of that. I'm just hoping Beth can trust me enough to let me try and make it up to her. And I agree, Carl doesn't know yet and this is going to cut deep. But yeah, it's my fault and I take full responsibility. I mixed way too much liquor with a jealous mind, instead of talking things over with Beth I acted out."

The older man just nodded, "I'll be saying my prayers for you, Bethie and Carl. We'll hope for the best."

He sat alone in the back of the church and he never took his eyes off of her. It was torture being this close and not being able to talk or touch. He was becoming more and more depressed but he couldn't make himself leave, he just wanted to be near her.

She was having a terrible time trying not to turn and look at him. She knew he was watching her. It was like she could feel his eyes boring holes through her. She wanted to look, because darn it, in spite of everything she still loved him. She just couldn't see how she could go back.

She didn't put all the blame on him like she had when it first happened. Maggie was right, she had suspected he was jealous of Spencer, and she did talk Spencer up, how strong he was, how funny, how talented he was at his job. And it seemed every time Rick walked in the bakery she and Spencer were laughing about something. She was flattered by Spencer's attention and she was flattered by Rick's jealousy.

She should have thought more about her husband's feelings. And when she started to feel like he didn't love her anymore, she should have discussed it with him, told him about the feelings she was having. Just like he should have told her about his feelings. Instead they'd both just let it fester until it finally boiled over.

When she and her family rose to leave the church, he was gone.

(((())))

After church, and before he picked up Carl, he'd gone to Dale and Erma's. He was praying he'd get a little bit of sympathy and understanding from Dale, he should have known better. "I've always been so proud of you Rick, felt you were a fine example of what a man should be, but son I think you know, that's not the way a real man treats a woman. I'm disappointed in you and I know that sounds harsh, but shit if you had a problem with her relationship with this guy, why the hell didn't you just ask her about it? You could have saved yourself, and your wife, a whole wagon load of heartache if you'd been honest with her, talked to her. I don't know how I could possibly help you out of this mess you've gotten yourself into. I think if she'll talk to you and she'll agree to it, the two of you need some counseling. I know you have a lot of love for each other and I hate to see you two lose that."

Monday

She was waiting for him to walk in the bakery door, she had her plan in place. She'd already talked to Rosita about how she wouldn't be waiting on Rick. She was shocked when Rosita smiled and asked, "Just how crazy do you plan to drive that man? He's not jealous enough yet? Geez Beth, you've made him suffer for weeks, the way you flirt around with Spencer, heck even I was getting jealous!" Rosita laughed, but Beth remembered what Maggie had said.

"I wasn't flirting with him, we were just having fun." She was feeling defensive.

Rosita just laughed again, "Yeah well you just keep telling yourself that Missy, maybe eventually you'll believe it." Beth felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up. Had she really been being that flirtatious with Spencer?

Rick didn't come in the bakery that day. Beth hadn't expected to feel bad if he didn't show, she thought she'd be relieved. She hated to admit she just wanted to look at him, she longed to talk to him, she wished she would have talked to him sooner. And she didn't want to miss him but she did, and she missed Carl.

But she wasn't going to falter, no way, what he'd done was wrong.

Tuesday morning came and he didn't stop at the bakery. When she got home Mama handed her a letter, it was from him. She just stuck it in her dresser drawer.

The letters continued to come, one each day. She put them all in the drawer.

Six Weeks Later

She'd started to get that telltale rounded belly and she'd finally told Daddy and Mama about the baby. Just as she knew they would be, they were excited they were going to be grandparents and sad about the circumstances.

He'd never been back to the bakery since that night had happened. Even though he'd heard Spencer didn't work there any more, that he'd gone off to Tuscaloosa with some girl. There was a new baker, a slightly older woman. But it just didn't seem right to go to Beth's work, that was her job, those were her friends, and he knew just the sight of him would make her uncomfortable.

Beth couldn't believe how things had changed in just a few short weeks.

He'd continued to show up at church on Sundays with Carl. Carl always came to her, gave her a hug and said he missed her. They'd chat for a few minutes and he'd go back to his Dad. Rick and Carl would sit in the back of the church and leave as soon as services ended.

During those six weeks letters had continued to come every day. She'd filled up a dresser drawer with those letters.

This Sunday he was at church again, and again he stood by the tree. Carl wasn't with him. This time when Daddy walked over and shook his hand the situation seemed somehow grimmer.

Daddy nodded solemnly, his shoulders seemed to slump as if they carried the weight of the world, he set a hand on her husbands shoulder and they strolled off together. They didn't make it for services. In fact, they didn't make it back until 20 minutes after services ended. They shook hands and her husband got in his pick up and drove away.

She didn't think he'd even glanced her way.

When they got home Daddy asked to talk to her in his office. He prefaced it, "I respect your decisions, it's your life Bethie, but I can't deny I'm sad you decided to give up on your marriage."

"I didn't give up Daddy, I'm just not ready to forgive."

"Your husband thinks you've given up. He told me, and I've seen the evidence, he's written every day. He said in each letter he'd taken full responsibility for what went wrong. He said he'd asked you to talk, he said he asked you to go to counseling with him. Rick says you've ignored his attempts to at least see if there is a way to salvage this marriage. You've avoided any kind of contact for weeks now."

"Daddy you have no idea what he did!" She was hurt and angry now.

"Oh no daughter, I know what he did, he confessed everything to me today, apologized and asked my forgiveness for mistreating my daughter. I gave him my forgiveness because I know exactly what the man is going through and exactly how much guilt he's carrying around. I've walked in his shoes." Her Daddy hung his head.

"What are you talking about Daddy? You would never do anything like that!"

"I'm ashamed to say that I would and I did. It was early on in my marriage to your Mother, you hadn't come into our lives yet. I was drinking heavily and I was full of anger. The peach crop was failing, a fox had gotten in the coop and killed most all the chickens, we lost a cow in a bad storm. Instead of handling these misfortunes like a man and looking for solutions, I acted like a fool. I got drunk and apparently decided to show your Mama just what a he man I was. She responded with a right uppercut to my chin. It still hurts when I think about it." And her Daddy smiled sadly and shook his head before continuing.

"You're Mama stayed here with Shawn and Maggie, I was the idiot that left. I went on a helluva bender, I think I was drunk for three weeks straight. I came to my senses while drinking in a roadhouse with Will Dixon, Daryl's father. Yep, that was the kind of company I was keeping then. Merle was a teenager, he came in looking for his father, he told him what had happened, their small shack had burned down to the ground. Will's wife, Merle and Daryl's Mama, died in that fire. Thank God the boys were both out of the house. It made me think about your Mama, how much I love her, how I'd feel if I lost her. I faced what I was giving up, I faced that I'd been weak and cowardly, and daughter I was being strong-willed. That's a nice way of saying stubborn. I think you may know something about that.

I went home to your Mama and begged her for another chance. I put down the bottle. She and I went to counseling. It wasn't a quick fix, we had to work at it and it was worth every bit of that work. We came out stronger, better and more committed than we'd ever been. And then we got you.

Rick told me he's asked Daryl to bring the rest of your things here tomorrow. He's got every intention of paying all of yours and all of the baby's expenses, and of course paying child support. He said to let you know he'd file the papers for the divorce this week so you can be free of him, free to live your own life. So I'm just suggesting you think about what you're giving up here Bethie. Rick's not perfect, no man is, but he loves you and he's willing to try. You've got a real nice boy with Rick and I know you love Carl. And you've got a baby on the way.

I suppose daughter, you have to ask yourself if divorce is what you want. Is there really no hope? I can't answer any of those questions for you, but think hard Beth, and don't let your stubborn head win a battle with your heart."

(((())))

She went up to her room and got the letters from the dresser drawer, she put them in order by postmark date. For the first time she opened the letters and read them. In each letter he apologized, took full responsibility for everything that had gone wrong. He wrote about the baby and how excited he was to have a child with her. How fortunate he'd been that she'd allowed him the opportunity to be a family, and how he was full of remorse about throwing that gift away. He pleaded with her to just talk to him, to consider going to couples counseling. He said he'd gone back to counseling and was seeing someone three times a week. He said he hoped they could save their marriage. He signed every letter, "I love you, I always will, Rick."

She was an emotional mess. She'd been reading letters and crying for over an hour. She thought about her own actions, she thought about his actions, thought about what Maggie had said and what Daddy had said and even what Rosita had said.

She thought about how much she loved and missed her husband, how much she missed Carl and being a Mom to him. She wanted her marriage and maybe it could be saved if they both worked hard.

She went in the bathroom and splashed cold water on her face. She came out, took a deep breath, picked up her phone and pushed the button, he answered on the first ring, "Beth."

A/N Well there it is, let me have it, what do you think? Thanks so much for reading xo