A/N: There really aren't enough words for you guys! Thank you so much for reading this story! Your reviews, favorites, follows mean everything to me! I'm so sorry that I'm just now getting this chapter out. It was supposed to be updated by New Years, but that didn't really go like I planned. And Happy New Year by the way! Just a quick note before reading, this story will have its high points and low points. From great holidays to tragic memories about addiction. I know it may seem now that everything is good, but it's not. Bonnie went through something traumatic and just because she went to rehab doesn't truly mean that she's 100% okay. But enough with my rambles. I really hope you all enjoy. Xoxo.

Pain.

Everyone in the Salvatore/Mikaelson winter home knew the exact replica of pain as their stomachs clenched in agony of all the gluttony they performed during Thanksgiving dinner. They were all dispersed in different areas of the house trying to digest and gain that feeling back in their stomach.

Damon brought Bonnie into his own personal study, and Bonnie would have admired it more due to the hundreds of books that were displayed on the shelves that separated it from the other studies in the house, but the pain in her stomach was clouding her favorite past time.

As they both found comfort on the sofa, letting the fire from the fireplace warm their skin, Bonnie held on to her stomach, "Remind me whenever I try to go back for that extra piece of turkey… the third time… just stop me. Literally pick me up and take me out of the kitchen." She groaned. "I don't care if I'm kicking and screaming."

Damon would pick her up alright. The thought quickly escaped his mind as quick as it entered.

"The same will probably have to be done for me." Damon was probably the odd ball out of the whole group of Salvatore's and Mikaelson's. He always ate desert first and then went for the main course. And the sweet potato pie that Katherine made was so good that he practically ate a whole one by himself before he even started on the main course.

"All these years of knowing Katherine, I never knew she could cook." Damon said, trying to make light conversation so he wouldn't think about undressing Bonnie with his teeth.

"Yep, her mom is a chef, and Elena and Katherine were always trying to compete with each other as children, so they spent hours in the kitchen with Mrs. Gilbert. And let's just say Elena burns toast and Katherine can make something as simple as a peanut butter and jelly sandwich taste like the nectar from the gods." She chuckled at some of the memories.

He couldn't help but smile at the gleam in her eyes as she relived some of her good memories. "So, you spent a lot of your time with them as kids?" He knew about a lot of the bad moments in her life, but it was nice to get to know the good moments about her that made her smile. And it was a first that he actually wanted to get to know things about someone.

"Yes, the Gilberts and the Forbes are like my second family. I mean don't get me wrong, Katherine and I never hung out back in the day, but she's still like my sister. Through the majority of it all it was Me, Elena, Caroline, Tyler, and Matt…" Her words faltered a little mentioning Matt, but she tried her best not to show sadness. "And sometimes Jeremy," She continued, "But the majority of the time he had his own crowd. But yeah, they're my family."

That was exactly how he was with his brother, the Mikaelson's, and Marcel. They were his family and he would die for them.

"So, what about you? How did you go about meeting Klaus and everyone?"

Damon wasn't an open book; he never had been. He rarely shared with anyone even though his brother knew him like the back of his hand. And it was strange for him that he didn't mind opening up to Bonnie.

"Well, my mother passed away a couple of years after Stefan was born and my dad passed away several years ago. Stefan and I met the Mikaelson's and Marcel when we were really young; our families were close so that brought us together. We would literally do anything for one another and we pretty much have. Stefan is pretty much my heart even though I would probably die before I let him know it." That caused her to smile.

"I'm sorry to hear about your parents." She didn't know what it was like to lose her parents the way he had, but she did know what it was like to not have them in her life.

"Don't be. I miss my mother every day; she was probably the sweetest person you would ever meet. My dad on the other hand was a world class asshole and I'm just surprised he left the company to me."

She definitely could relate to the dad being a world class asshole part.

Damon unconsciously intertwined his hand in hers because her lightly caressing it wasn't helping his growing urge to rip her clothes off. "It was interesting growing up with everyone, we always ruined all of Rebekah's love interests. Elijah and Finn always made them come in the house to give the third degree and Klaus would show him his wall of daggers, while Kol would give them a firm handshake that would almost break their hand. Any by chance that didn't work, Stefan and I would be waiting by the car, and if we didn't knock the fear out of them, Marcel would be waiting at their destination." He laughed at the memory, "She wouldn't speak to us for months."

Bonnie smiled listening to Damon tell stories of his family and seeing that glint in his eyes as he reflected on his memories. It felt good and comfortable getting to know this side of him. And she felt comfortable letting him know more about her as well.

When Rose left a couple days ago, due to her excuse of taking Meredith to the airport and then deciding to leave as well, Damon noticed that Bonnie seemed a bit more comfortable around him; even after the embarrassing kiss he gave her in his blind rage.

So, when his head rested on her lap and he continued sharing stories with her, it just seemed right…normal; like they had been doing it for ages.

"It's not fair I get stuck with clean up duty. Stefan tricked me." Rebekah pouted as she began stacking the dishwasher.

"You lost three times, Bexs." Marcel said referring to the rock, paper, scissors that Rebekah lost to the Salvatore brothers with, while handing her dishes off of the table. "Plus, I volunteered to help you so calm down."

She immediately stuck her tongue out at him and he flashed her that million dollar smile that he did without thinking and would make every woman swoon… even Rebekah sometimes.

Instantly brushing away the flustered feeling that was coming over her, she began putting the extra food away.

"So, we never got to really talk the other day. How are you feeling about what happened with Meredith?" Rebekah asked.

"There's really nothing to talk about." Marcel answered, throwing contents away. He wasn't trying to be defensive, but after everything that happened in his life concerning Meredith, it was something he wasn't ready to truly talk about. "We talked about it, decided we should truly end things, and then she left."

"Is that what you truly wanted?" When Rebekah turned around, Marcel was standing just a few inches away from her. It caught her off guard a little, and if the fridge wasn't already against her back, she would have backed up a little.

"I know you talked to her." His words came out in a husky tone that almost made her forget what he said.

But she wasn't that lucky. "A-are you upset?"

"No." Was his answer. Simple. But he still stood there; looking at her… almost as if he were looking into her. He then leaned in, and for a moment, Rebekah had the crazy idea that he was going to kiss her. But he didn't. His lips brushed the shell of her ear, "Thank you…" He whispered. And yes, Rebekah gained a chill.

He then gave her another smile, and walked out, leaving her with her thoughts and her heart racing erratically.

Pouring herself a glass of water, she popped a pill in her mouth, hoping the effects would work incredibly fast.

"So, we have no idea where he is?" Damon asked, as he stood in Niklaus's study across from him and Marcel.

"Apparently he checked out of the hotel. Connor isn't stupid; otherwise he would have gone to the police when he realized Shane was missing." Marcel said.

Damon wasn't going to let this worry him. He could have information on Connor Jordan in minutes, including social security numbers, every single girl he's ever been with, and if he owned a tricycle as a child. And as soon as he got back to Manhattan he would do that.

"I'll find him." Damon stated, "And when I do…"

"I'll take care of it." Klaus cut in. He was just a little upset that he didn't get to do as much damage as he wanted to do to Shane, so he would have to make up for it with Connor. It wasn't a pleasant hobby he had, but he was good at it and it gave him an unexplainable rush.

Damon nodded.

Before anything else could be said between any of them, Lexie walked in with a glass of red wine in her hand, "Let me guess, planning a murder?"

Damon rolled his eyes at his brother's blonde best friend. He didn't have anything against Lexie, but he wasn't really on board with her knowing about what they did. Or even participating in it back in the day. He didn't want that life for her… he didn't want her around any of it.

"I need to get back to sleep; I have to leave early in the morning." Damon said, walking out. He and Elijah had to get back to Salvatore Industries tomorrow to fix some complications that happened while they were away. But that wasn't the exact reason he left. He and Bonnie had fell asleep after talking for a couple hours, and he didn't like having to get up from her body cuddled safely into him, to discuss a wasted piece of space.

Marcel walked out a few moments later, leaving Klaus and Lexie to talk.

"I sure know how to clear a room," Lexie took another sip of wine. Yes, she was a little tipsy.

"Eh, you know Damon, he doesn't particularly like the idea of you knowing about all of this."

"I haven't done that in a very long time, and I don't plan on doing it again. Your secret is safe with me." She said, sitting down across from him.

"But I see it in your eyes, you want too."

She took another sip, "Sometimes I do, but I love Lucy too much to have her date someone who didn't mind slicing people up from time to time. She wouldn't understand and I don't want to lie to her. You know all about that too well don't you."

"Low blow, Alexia." He stood up and walked over to his mini bar to pour himself a glass of scotch.

"She misses you, you know?"

Now it's his turn to take a drink.

"She tries to keep herself busy, she tries to make it seem like she hates you, when in reality it's quite the opposite. She goes on dates and they never seem to be successful. Her work keeps her busy. But I know she misses you."

Klaus looked at her, and then poured some more scotch into his glass. "The topic of your sister is not something I like to visit." Even though a small part of him wished she would have joined Lexie on this trip.

"Really? Because I know you Klaus. I know that you have the resources to check in on her and I know that you do from time to time." She was now pouring herself some scotch.

Yes, Klaus felt like drinking himself numb tonight, "She is not aware is she?"

"No… Cami is not aware." She mimicked his accent with a small smile. She knew that one day, Klaus would get over himself and get back with her sister again, but as of right now they would drink.

The next morning, Damon was up early, showered and ready for a long day in the office. He and Elijah would be leaving in about ten minutes and the sun wasn't even up yet. He made his way back into his study to where Bonnie was sleeping peacefully, and simply couldn't help but stare at her.

Damon knew he was gaining feelings for Bonnie, but his dick shouldn't get hard just by watching her sleep. A slip of drool was escaping her lips, and all he could think about doing was waking her up and putting her on his face. Quickly, the thought left his mind when she shifted in her sleep. He then placed a note by her head so she would see it when she woke up. A part of him felt like someone completely different. He was never a guy who left notes or goodbye letters….never someone who stayed up all night sharing stories of his past. And for some reason it was just different with Bonnie.

After placing a kiss on her forehead, he left the woman he so desperately wanted to take with him.

Bonnie's eyes shot open to the sun shining brightly through the window. For a moment she almost forgot where she was. Her dreams were consumed with nothing but Matt and she knew the tears in her eyes at the moment were due to that. Honestly, sometimes she hated to go to sleep because seeing him every night was still too much to bear. As strong as she tried to be in front of everyone, behind closed doors she could break down all she wanted too. Because Matt was a part of her….he would always be, and five hundred therapy sessions wouldn't be able to ease her mind of him not being alive anymore.

Noticing an envelope next to her, she opened it and remembered everything that happened last night. She and Damon talking for hours about their lives, him finding her lap to be a pillow and then her finding his chest to be a pillow as the night went on. Spending that time with Damon, she could honestly say, she felt safe….warm. As if she's known him forever. And she valued the fact that they could move slow and get to know each other as friends first.

A small smile formed on her lips as she read his words.

'You were sleep, so I didn't want to wake you. You looked peaceful. Rebekah thought it was stupid to just give you my email. So here's my number. Use it.'

She couldn't help but laugh. It was obvious that Damon was not the type to write a letter to anyone.

"Don't be a stranger." Bonnie said, as Lucy wrapped her arms around her in a tight embrace.

"You have my number, email, home and work address. I'm always available for you dear cuz." Lucy smiled.

They were both overwhelmed with joy that they were able to see each other again and reconnect.

"Give Sheila my love." Lucy said before getting in the passenger seat.

"Be safe and take care of my cousin." Bonnie smiled to Lexie.

"Of course I will." She winked, and after yelling bye to everyone, they drove off.

As Bonnie was about to walk to the vehicle that Caroline, Jeremy, Tyler, and Mason were already in, she couldn't help but take a moment to stare at the house that she stayed in for the week. She truly had a great time.

"There's still time for you to come with us." Rebekah's accented voice filled Bonnie's ears as she stood beside her. "We can get an apartment together and I can show you the rest of New York City. You will love it."

Bonnie wouldn't lie and say that she hadn't thought about Rebekah's offer several times throughout the whole trip. But she couldn't leave Mystic Falls…. not yet.

And before she could let that be known, Caroline's voice made them both turn around, "No she won't." Bonnie gave her a smile and Rebekah rolled her eyes.

"Well, I think she will."

Bonnie really didn't need her two best friends having an arguing match again… especially over her. "I'll see you in a couple weeks at Katherine's wedding."

"Then that will give me enough time to think of a better plan to get you to move." Rebekah wasn't the type to give up and a lot of the times she got what she wanted.

As she gave Bonnie a hug, she looked at Caroline, "Cherish these next few weeks with her because she'll be moving up here for New Year's."

Bonnie rolled her eyes and Caroline gave her the finger.

Caroline and Rebekah were going to be the death of her; Bonnie shook her head as she got in the car.

"Where's Elena and Stefan?" Bonnie asked, just now realizing that she hadn't seen them all morning.

"Do I really need to answer that?" Caroline smirked.

That gave them all confirmation on what Stefan and Elena were most likely doing.

Jeremy immediately climbed up front and honked the horn several times, "You guys can do that later. Let's go!"

"Stefan please…. I'm so sorry… I never, I don't know what happened. But it's over between me and him. I ended it… I…. Please…" Elena sobbed. She tried caressing his face because the tears were in his eyes too, but he grabbed her hands, gently yet with enough force to stop her.

"I love you Elena. But…."

"Then if you love me, we can fix this Stefan. I know I messed up, but please… I love you Stefan… you."

"It's not enough. When I look at you, it hurts." And it did. It killed him, because Elena was the first and only girl he ever loved.

"Stefan…."

"I don't want you in my life. Please respect that."

Hearing the horn from the car outside and Jeremy's voice issuing them to come on, Elena put her hood over her head and tried her best to wipe her tears as she walked outside and got in the passenger seat.

She felt so numb that Jeremy and Caroline's 21 questions didn't really faze her. She barely heard Bonnie shush them up.

Bonnie could tell immediately when Elena got in the car that something was wrong, and by the looks of Stefan's face and him talking with Marcel about something before getting in the other vehicle, and Marcel getting in their driver's seat, it was all confirmed.

Elena and Stefan had just broken up.

It was late when they arrived back in Mystic Falls. Stefan didn't join them back on the private jet and went straight to Manhattan instead. Katherine also decided to join Elena back in Mystic Falls to stay for the weekend. Yes, they rarely got along at times, but they were still sisters who loved each other. And Katherine knew that Elena was broken, so she needed to be there for her.

"I'm sorry for being such a bitch about your friendship with Rebekah." Caroline confessed to Bonnie as she pulled up to her driveway.

"Is that what you were doing?" Even though Bonnie held sarcasm in her voice, the humor behind it wasn't missed.

"It's just that you two have this connection and I know it's stupid, but she knows things about you and can help you with things that I can't." She then shrugged, "I don't know, I just guess I'm a bit jealous."

"You don't have to be, Care." Bonnie assured her, grabbing her hand, "You and Elena have been my best friends since we were practically in diapers. You know more about me than practically anyone. You're my sister, Caroline. Me making a new friend isn't going to change what we have."

"Good." Caroline chippered right up. "I wouldn't have allowed it anyways."

Bonnie gave her a hug and then walked into her house. She had every intention of texting Damon to see how his day was going and if everything got fixed at his company. But as soon as she stepped inside, she wouldn't have been surprised if her heart literally jumped out of her chest at the sight in front of her, because she didn't think it was even beating anymore.

Her grandmother was sitting across from her abusive father and a mother who left her at a very young age.

"Bonnie…." Sheila said, standing up. The look on her granddaughter's face, almost made her regret having the two people here that caused her a lot of heartache. But, they both wanted to fix what they had broken and Sheila felt that Bonnie should at least hear them out and make a decision for herself.

"What is this?" Bonnie's question was almost deaf upon her own ears as she tried to wrap her brain around what she was seeing. She had to be dreaming. She must have fallen asleep on the jet and her mind decided to play an evil trick on her by giving her the nightmare from hell.

"Bonnie; Abby and Rudy would like to talk to you."

Grams must have fallen and hit her head while she was away, because she could not deal with this unnecessary bull shit. Unnecessary bullshit that was making her skin heat up and painful memories engulf her like a tidal wave.

"I'm going to go upstairs and when I wake up in the morning, you two won't be here." As she was about to make her way upstairs, her Grams words stopped her.

"Bonnie Bennett. It took a lot for both of them to come here and do this, just hear them out…. Please."

Bonnie turned back around. "Grams, really?" She tried her best not to raise her voice, because even though she was pissed off, Sheila was still her grandmother and it was disrespectful to raise your tone at your elders…especially someone who was a better parent than the other two standing in front of her.

"Bonnie, sweetheart…" And those two words coming from her Dad's lips ignited a rage deep within her.

"Don't fucking call me that," she spat out, ignoring Sheila's protest of her foul language. "I am not your sweetheart, I am not your daughter… you are not my father. You're some stupid drunk who laid his hands on me for no fucking reason!" Her eyes then connected with Abby, "And you… you're the reason he turned into such an abusive asshole. You left him… you left me. You didn't care. So, you can't come back here and expect it all to be okay." The tears were forming in her eyes, and that pissed her off even more. She would not cry over people who meant nothing to her. "So, I don't want anything from either of you… your apologies mean nothing to me, so don't even bother."

"Bonnie Bennett!" Her grams cut her off before she could say anything else.

"You know what he did to me." Her eyes were locked on her Grams, "You took me out of there and brought me here. You wouldn't let him see me." She took a breath trying her best to calm down, "I'm not doing this anymore. I'm tired. I've had a long week. I'm going to bed."

No more words were spoken as Bonnie made her way to her room, locking the door behind her. She couldn't believe this; couldn't believe that her Grams would spring this on her without giving her a little ounce of warning.

This was all one big mind fuck.

While she began looking through her drawers, her Grams voice filled her ears, as she spoke on the other side of the door. "He's been to rehab Bonnie. He's turning his life around. Your mother is turning her life around as well." Silence. "We're Bennett's Bonnie…. we forgive. Maybe not right away… but we forgive."

And she knew exactly when her Grams left the other side of the door, because it was the exact same time she found her stash. People could call her stupid… hell, even weak for still having something that ruined a big part of her life. And maybe she was those things.

She was a mess. Sitting on her bedroom floor contemplating on if she should rehash the worst part of her life. A part that everyone thought she got rid of, but hid a few reminders away just in case. She spent several long months in one of the best rehabilitation centers in the country that she didn't even have to pay for. She got the help she needed. She thought she would be okay. But maybe… just maybe she wasn't done fighting the demons of her past. Because at this moment she didn't want to feel anything but numb.

She then grabbed her cell phone, because she knew she needed to be calmed down… she needed someone to talk some sense into her.

When she got Damon's voicemail, she almost hung up, but hearing his voice, even though it was recorded, left her leaving a message.

"Hey Damon," She tried to hold back on crying, "I know it's late and I know that you're busy so I didn't expect you to pick up. I'm- I'm sorry for calling you like this, but everything just got majorly fucked up and my dad and mom want to make things right and I…." She couldn't continue, "I'm sorry. Just ignore this message." She said right before hanging up.

She stared at the powdery white substance again wondering if she could really do this. Would this take her back to the place where she loathed herself or would one time really just be one time? Matt wouldn't want this for her. She didn't want this for herself. But it would make things so much easier if she did.

But life wasn't easy.

"We're Bennett's Bonnie… we forgive." She kept hearing her Grams voice repeatedly in her head.

But she didn't want too.

She didn't know how long she stayed on her bathroom floor weighing her options. She was stronger than this. She recently looked into the eyes of the man who sexually, mentally, and physically abused her. Yes, she fainted like some damsel in distress who didn't know how to hold it together, but hell with her history it was expected.

Was this how her life would be like; not being able to truly get pass it all? Cowering away from life when it got too hard and finding solace in something that destroyed her. Would she ever truly be able to get close to Damon because Matt was still consumed in her mind? Would Damon even continue to pursue her if she kept moving at this rate? Would she ever go back to college? Find a job? Make something of herself? Her mind was on overload. She didn't know what time it was; didn't even know if it was the next day.

When her phone went off, she instantly thought it was Damon returning her call, but it was Caroline.

It was 8:15 am.

She answered her cell phone, and by the sound of her voice, no one would ever assume that she spent the whole night on the floor in her room crying and lost in her thoughts while debating on snorting the white nose candy that never left her hand.

"Hey Bons, I know it's early, but Mrs. Lockwood needs volunteers for the Mystic Falls Annual Fall Festival. Katherine and Elena are doing some sisterly bonding with everything that happened and Jeremy is on his way back to living his life at college; so that leaves you, me, and Tyler. What do you say?"

She wanted desperately to say no because she was beyond the point of tired, but she agreed and would join her in an hour.

Bonnie would believe anyone if they told her that her feet were bleeding right now, because the pain that enveloped them was ridiculous. She had been on her feet for five hours straight trying to make this festival a success. Between Mrs. Lockwood and her wants and needs and Caroline's bossy attitude when it came to planning events, she was really in the process of reconsidering this whole sobriety thing.

As she was trying to lift a box that was obviously too heavy for her, she heard Tyler's voice from behind her, "Let me help you with that."

"Thanks Ty. Remind me never to answer Caroline's phone calls on Mystic Fall event days."

"Hey at least you aren't the son of someone who is over these events." He said, placing the box down where it needed to be.

Once he did, he noticed something drop out of Bonnie's coat pocket onto the ground. Picking up the small plastic packet filled with a white substance, instantly filled him with anger.

"What is this?" You could hear the malice in his question. Even though he knew exactly what it was, he was just so pissed off he didn't know what else to say.

"Tyler…" Bonnie could only get out his name before he cut her off.

"All that shit you put us through and you're just going to go back to that life? What the fuck Bonnie?"

"Tyler, keep your voice down." Even though they were away from the crowd, any louder Bonnie knew they would begin to gather around.

"Why Bonnie? Because you don't want anyone else to find out that you're doing drugs again?

"Tyler…"

"Just forget it, there's not hope for you. There probably never was."

As he walked away, Bonnie was able to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall.

Later that night everyone was gathered around the bonfire, as the flames warmed their skin. Bonnie was sitting down on one of the benches as Tyler's words replayed in her head. Maybe he was right. Maybe there wasn't any hope for her.

She was so lost in thought that she didn't even realize when someone sat down beside her until her hand was being intertwined with the warmth of theirs.

She instantly looked beside her and her eyes connected with Damon's.

"I would have been here sooner but…."

She didn't even let him finish before she put her arms around him and held on for dear life. She needed his comfort. And he held onto her like he needed hers too.

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Please let me know what you think =) Love you all. Xoxo.