The drive home was silent.

Dally said all that needed to be said.

I didn't know what to say or how I should be feeling.

My first relationship was over before it actually got started, I felt like such a failure.

I'd lost my grandma, who'd been my rock in life, I'd lost Soda my only friend in what had been my small world. I'd lied to the Curtis's who had taken me in, but most of all I felt like I lost myself because of what I'd believed Dally wanted.

The problem was I wasn't sure how to find myself let alone know who I was anymore.

So much had changed which caused my entire life to shift.

I was so afraid if I looked at myself in a mirror I wouldn't know the person staring back.

How was I going to find myself when I had never felt so lost and alone except, when my Grandma and parents had died.

"You okay" Dally asked quietly as we pulled up to the Curtis's in one of Buck's cars.

Looking at the house I'd been living in for months I found that I still couldn't call it home, it was still someone else's now more than ever I felt like an outsider.

"Yea...I'm okay" I said trying not to let my inner turmoil show. After all it wasn't Dally's fault I'd become a stranger to myself.

I didn't want him to feel bad after all this was my fault, so I would have to deal with it myself; I had no one else for support.

Dally didn't reply but I saw him nod out of the corner of my eye. I couldn't bring myself to look at him directly because I was to afraid I would start crying again and this time I would not be able to stop as I did in his room.

"Come on I'll walk you up" Dally said after a moment of silence.

I watched as Dally got out of the car walking around to open the door for me.

I nodded not sure what else to say at this point as Dally gently reached for my hand and held it tight as we walked up to the Curtis's porch the reality of the situation landed on me.

I'd lost Dally; possibly forever if I couldn't find myself, even then there were no guaranties. Why would Dally want someone as messed up as me?

I almost collapsed right at that moment as it began to sink in. This might be the end of Dally and I forever!

First off I'm sorry that it's taken me so long to update. No I haven't forgotten my story and yes I will be updating more I promise. I'm already working on the next chapter so it should be up in the next week or so. Please Please please continue reading don't punish Dally and Rachel because I'm such a horrible author.

Also this chapter has not been edited by my beta. I emailed her today but I wanted to post this as soon as possible so everyone didn't think I forgot about my story.

Thank you!

Thank you Purple Soap for pointing out the different POV that I did. Honestly what was I thinking lol! So sorry everyone!