"I don't know what you want me to say, I'm just being honest and you're getting all annoyed with me. How do you expect me to want to be intimate with you again when you're acting like this when I just bring the topic up?" Haley exclaimed as her voice began to tremble.
"It's annoying! You say one thing, then say another, you're only answering me with open-ended answers and nothing is really being resolved." Nathan shouted back.
"Fine, I'll just shut my big mouth then." Haley responded childishly as she walked away from Nathan.
"Haley, come on!" Nathan yelled as she left the tutoring center.
Nathan's POV
Haley was upset with me the rest of the day, she even got a ride back home with someone else. As I drove home alone I realized how unreasonable I was being as well. She was being candid and honest with me, while I was just feeding her bullshit that I thought she wanted to hear, if anything, I was the one being confusing and open-ended.
When I got home the kids were already back from Haley's parents place. All I could hear as I walked into the house was, "I missed you little poopy heads." Followed with tons of kisses.
"Look babies, Daddy is back!" She said in an enthusiastic voice.
Even though Haley had a happy voice going with the kids she was still not happy with me. But I loved her for not involving the twins in any of the stupid arguments we had.
"Dada!" Rosie ran up to me. My little girl seriously brightened up any bad day for me.
"Hi baby, I missed you." I said as I kissed her chubby little arm.
"Dada, dada, me, me!" I heard from a very jealous Jamie.
"Now, Jamie, be a gentleman and let your sister say hello to me in peace." I joked. I saw Haley smile from the corner of my eye.
"Can we talk later tonight?" I asked her.
"Mhm." She replied quietly as she picked up Jamie.
After putting the kids to bed I finally decided to walk back to our bedroom. This walk of shame reminded me of the times I was sneaking back into the house from parties or asking my parents to bail me out of something I did wrong. I never felt this way when it came to Haley, for once, I was awkward.
"Hey…" I said sheepishly as I entered the room.
Haley was sitting quietly on the bed. She was beautiful, even in her fuzzy robe and hair tied in a messy bun. Her legs were crossed as if she were waiting to be scolded by a school principal.
"Look, I was thinking about what I said earlier today… I was totally out of line for saying all that crap to you. I'm sorry."
"Sorry doesn't just magically fix our problems Nathan," Haley retorted.
"I know that, it's just… I feel like an idiot for lashing out at you for something so, miniscule." I admitted.
She paused for a few moments.
"I understand how it can be frustrating, and your response wasn't the best, but, I can understand where you're coming from."
"I just want to make you happy and I get upset when I feel like I'm letting you down." She needed to understand that I wasn't just being some horny bastard.
"And I love you for that, but, you know how… sensitive I am when it comes to the topic of sex with you. I mustered up my courage to confide in you and you totally shut me down out of the blue." She confessed. My shame set in big time.
"I'm an idiot for reacting the way that I did but I really just couldn't help it. I know that sounds selfish but, you know how I am when I get frazzled and frustrated."
She grabbed my hands and started grazing my palms with her thumbs.
"No matter how idiotic you get, I'll always end up forgiving you. Unless of course you cheat on me or something, I don't think you'll live to see my forgiveness." The woman I married is amazing.
"I still want to talk things out about your worries."
"Ok." She responded shyly.
"I know the topic makes you uncomfortable, and I understand, but you have to remember that it's me, Nathan. I'm not going to judge or pressure you into anything you don't want to do. It would be great, but, it would be pointless if you were uncomfortable."
"I'm frustrated with myself. It's like our marriage is backwards. I mean, we have two freaking kids and im here freaking out about sex with my HUSBAND, I sound like a crazy lady." She laughed annoyed at herself.
"You're being too hard on yourself. It's not simple. If it were simple it wouldn't be this controversial thing to everyone. It's a big deal and I don't want you to think im making light of."
"I miss feeling that intimate with you. I don't know why I'm so scared of doing it again."
"Hales, I don't know what to tell you exactly. I wish I was as smart as you so I could say something that didn't make me sound like a doofus. But we're young honey. We have so much time to discover all our sexual intricacies and pleasures. I know it seems like everyone around us is so experienced but who cares? They literally do not matter, because me and you are unstoppable, we are happily married, have two beautiful children, and couldn't be more in love. Heck, we're still in high school! People married for years would KILL to be as in love as we are. So don't fret my little Haley Waley." I said to her with a comforting hand now on her cheek.
Haley was a worry wart and I knew I had to sincerely convince her of the problem being resolved.
"I love you so much Nathan" she said simply and elegantly.
"I love you too sweetie."
Haley's POV Two months later
I wanted to surprise Nathan. He has no idea that I have the whole night planned for the two of us, he doesn't even know that I dropped the twins off with my parents… After Nathan being so understanding of our sex situation it still took me a bit of time to warm up to the idea of being intimate. But after deep consideration I knew I needed to take the plunge or our relationship would forever be at a standstill with this cloud of worry hanging over me. Even though it took some convincing I really got excited about the thought. Since then, I've been planning our perfect night.
"Honey, what time are you getting home after practice?" I knew he had basketball practice and he would be in the gym with the team; that bought me some time to set up our dinner.
"Umm.. I'm not exactly sure yet. But I want to say around 6?"
"Ok, sounds good."
"How are Jamie and Rosie?" he questioned as I heard him slam his locker closed.
"They're napping right now" which was a complete lie because they were with my parents now.
"Well give them a kiss for me."
"I will."
"I gotta go now, practice is starting soon, I love you!" He quickly hung up.
The plan was smooth sailing. I began prepping for our steak dinner and hoped everything would turn out perfect.
Nathan's POV
As I walked out of practice I felt like my legs were noodles, I was so exhausted, all I wanted to do was sleep.
I got into my car and tried to start it but the engine would stop. There was something definitely wrong and it was the last thing I needed to deal with after my long day…
I tried again but nothing. I would have left the car there but there was no way for the kids and Haley to get around in the morning, so I decided to call Uncle Keith.
Although he was my uncle, he was the only major auto repair shop in Tree Hill, so it was just my luck that he was out on a different call. He asked if I could wait an hour and I was fine with that if it meant my car would be fixed right away.
It was around 7 and I finally decided to call Haley. With the chaos of everything I forgot to give her the details of what was happening.
"Hey sweetie, you wouldn't believe what happened."
"I was worried about you not being home yet. What happened? Are you ok?"
"I'm fine, but the car isn't doing too hot."
"Where are you? Still at school?"
"No, I'm down at the car shop with Keith. He told me it would only take a couple more hours for the battery and everything."
"A couple more hours? What time are you getting home?" She sounded frustrated.
"Around 9, maybe 10."
"I see. Well I'll have dinner without you then."
"You haven't eaten yet? Eat! I don't want you getting lightheaded or anything."
"Thanks sweetie." She sounded glum.
"Why do you sound so down in the dumps?"
"No reason."
"You're not convincing me." I joked, but there was no laugh on the other side of the call.
"Just get home soon. I'll see you later." Then she hung up.
It was around 10 when I got home and the lights were turned off, Haley was probably already sleeping. I checked the kids room to find that they weren't in there and I automatically got worried.
"Hales!" I announced as I walked into our room.
"Hi sweetie." She said as she laid in bed.
"Where are the kids?" I asked confused.
"They're with my parents." She said not facing me.
"Why?"
Out of nowhere I start hearing sobs.
"What's the matter?" I said as I quickly went to her side to face her.
"N-nothing." She said as she bit on her lip to hinder the tears.
"No, tell me. Why are you crying?"
"I'm too embarrassed to tell." She cried even harder.
"Look, hey, come on, calm down, it's gonna be alright." I said with my hand on her back.
"No it's not, it's not gonna be alright. We're never gonna have sex again and you're gonna get sick of me." Haley sobbed.
"What are you talking about? When did it get to that?" I was utterly confused and needed clarification.
Haley finally decided to sit up and actually look me in the eyes.
"I planned this whole night for us. A dinner, candlelit, everything." She started.
"I wanted tonight to be the night w-w-we be intimate again." She said as she looked away from me.
"But then your practice ended a little late and then the car broke down, my timing sucks, it's like an omen or something." She said annoyed at her luck.
"I'm so sorry Hales. Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't want to ruin anything, but now our whole night is freakin ruined." She said as she threw a pillow off the bed.
"Hey now, who said it was ruined?" all I wanted to do in that moment was make her feel better.
"Don't try and lie to make me feel better." She pouted like a baby.
"I'm not lying, does it look like I'm lying" I said as I kissed her teary cheek.
After my long day, sleeping with Haley sounded great. After months of not having sex with her I began thinking it would never happen again.
With that being said, I began kissing her neck in slow motions. Planting kisses here and there.
"Nathan." She began.
"I missed you baby."
"Nathan, honey…" her voice lingered as she pushed away.
"What is it?" I said scratching my head in frustration.
"I'm not in the mood anymore." She admitted in a bit of a scared tone.
"Fine." I said with obvious annoyance.
"I'm sorry." She apologized.
"Don't be," I quickly snapped.
"But I am, it's always the same issue with me and I know you're getting irritated with me" she said getting red in the face. I could tell her embarrassment and shame were quickly setting in.
"Look… let's just go to sleep sweetie." I said as I rubbed her messy hair.
A/N: I know it is starting to sound a little dragged out but I am slowly trying to pump these chapters out again! Hey, at least it hasn't been YEARS, right? Honestly just trying to get the feel of things again. I just wanted to thank all my readers again. I seriously would not be doing this without you guys. Rate and review! -Camille