A/N: Thanks for your reviews!

Fake

Gibbs stared at the other man, trying to figure out why he suddenly agreed with him. Hadn't he just told him to get over his fear of kissing another man, just to say the exact opposite now? Tony was still looking back at him impassively. The coldness had vanished from his eyes but Gibbs was sure that that was on purpose. God, he hated the fact that the guy was such a good actor. It almost made it impossible for Gibbs to read him and he despised that fact. It had always been his strength to gauge other's reactions, but it was no use with Tony now.

"What?" he finally said, not quite sure what to say.

"This casual thing," Tony shrugged and averted his eyes from the older man to look at his knees instead. "It won't work."

"I know," Gibbs replied but still watched him attentively in case Tony would slip up after all.

"Gibbs," Tony finally turned to look at him again and with a sinking heart Gibbs realized that his expression was the honest one again. "It wouldn't work because I don't do casual."

Gibbs blinked and then looked away. He stared at the blank screen of Tony's TV for a moment and tried to get his heartbeat under control. Tony didn't want this thing to be casual - even though Gibbs didn't want this thing at all. He pinched the bridge of his nose as he subtly shook his head.

"And frankly," Tony continued apparently unaware of Gibbs' inner turmoil, "I'm hurt."

"Why?" Gibbs asked exasperatedly.

"Because I thought you knew me better than that. I thought you'd know that I don't want a fling or a friends-with-benefits-thing. I'm tired of that. I want something deeper and more meaningful. And I thought you knew that; I thought that you'd gather that from our talks. And still here you are, believing the press' stories about me even though you claim that you don't even read them."

"I don't," Gibbs replied, slightly aggrieved by Tony's accusations. "I don't read the trash and I do know better. But Tony, listen. How can it be more than a casual thing?"

"What do you mean?" Tony checked back and when Gibbs looked at him, he could see the confusion on the other man's face that he had heard in his voice, too.

"What do I mean?" Gibbs asked, letting out a sarcastic bark of a laugh. "What I mean is… how do you expect this to work? You'll be here for what? Another week? And then what? Last time I checked you're living in LA. That's not exactly nearby. So how do you imagine this to work? You fly here every weekend? I won't be able to go to your place, ever. As you've seen this weekend, even when I'm not on call, I kind of am."

Tony was rendered speechless at Gibbs' outburst. Gibbs hadn't raised his voice but looking at Tony now it seemed like he had. The younger man had leaned back, his eyes fixed on a point right above Gibbs' head. Gibbs could almost see him think. It didn't matter though. Gibbs knew he was right. It wouldn't – couldn't – work like this.

It took Tony a couple of moments to answer this time but when he did, Gibbs was surprised at how steady and forceful his voice sounded.

"You were a marine once," he said. "You were away from home for long stretches of time. You made it work then. How is this different?"

Gibbs let out a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. Logically speaking, Tony was right about that but still this was something entirely different to back then. His heart ached, just thinking about all the time he hadn't spent with Shannon and Kelly.

"It's different," he replied quietly, causing Tony to lean forwards again. "I was young then, thought I had a whole life to spend with Shannon. I still haven't forgiven myself that I was away when it happened. I could have prevented it and all." He stopped for a moment, drawing in a deep breath. He still didn't know how it could hurt so much even after all these years. "Anyway… yes, I've done this before and that was enough to know that I don't want to waste time like this again."

"But you aren't in a warzone this time," Tony tried again but trailed off when he saw Gibbs shake his head.

"Neither was Shannon back then."

Silence started to spread and for a long time neither Tony nor Gibbs spoke. The older man knew that he had taken the wind out of Tony's sails, but he also knew that the younger man was probably not finished yet. Deep down, though, Gibbs realized that there was no way either of them could recover from that. He hated using Shannon against Tony but in the end it had needed to be done. He knew it and Tony would understand, too, some time.

"So, you're saying that you can't do this," Tony made a hand gesture between them, "because you can't do a long distance relationship."

"Yeah," Gibbs nodded.

He almost apologized when he saw the hurt in the other man's eyes. He didn't know how much of it was real and how much of it was fake, but Tony seemed to be genuinely taken aback and it hurt Gibbs more than he had thought.

"So if I lived here or you lived in LA, you'd give this a chance?"

"I don't know," Gibbs answered truthfully because he hadn't expected the question in the first place. "Does it matter?"

"I think it does," Tony nodded, his eyes holding an underlying honesty. "It means that I was right about you after all. And it also means that you might be a better actor than I am. I mean I almost bought your act of you not being into me. I was seriously doubting myself that I've read your signs wrong."

"What signs?" Gibbs asked, unable to hold himself back.

"You know," Tony gestured around aimlessly once more. "It wasn't actually obvious. But well, you did seem like you enjoyed being around me. And you have no idea how hard it is to find someone who likes me for me. Someone who doesn't spend time with me because I'm famous or because I have money. If anything, you seemed to despise the fact that I'm fairly popular. It was such a breath of fresh air."

Gibbs remained silent once more, not exactly sure what he was supposed to say to that. Tony was right of course, he didn't give a damn about how famous Tony was. He liked him, it was as simple as that. With a sinking heart, he also realized that Tony might have been right about another thing, too. For all his acting like he didn't like Tony like that, Gibbs' heart hurt more at the mere thought of not seeing the younger man again after today. And Gibbs knew that it would be like that. They couldn't start something – especially when Gibbs still wasn't sure he even wanted anything like that – and he was quite sure that Tony wasn't in this because of a friendship. Gibbs was a horrible friend on good days and Tony probably knew that deep down, too.

Tony, who had been looking at his coffee table for the last couple of moments, suddenly fixed his eyes on Gibbs again and the look was so intense all of a sudden that the older man had to use all his willpower not to look away. While he had thought he had seen sincerity in Tony's expression before, he had to realize that it had all been an act until now. This was what Tony looked like when he was being totally honest. And as if someone had flipped the switch, Gibbs could see regret and oddly enough determination glistening in his face. Before he knew what to do with this revelation, Tony edged closer, his eyes looking into Gibbs'.

"So, thanks," Tony started to speak again, his voice barely above a whisper, which in return made something in Gibbs' stomach flutter. "For being real with me even when you weren't."

Gibbs just nodded as he watched Tony's glance flicker from his eyes to his lips and back up again.

"So," Tony continued, while his stare was still so intense that Gibbs hadn't managed to look away yet. "Friends?"

Gibbs felt himself nod even as Tony inched closer. For a moment the older man was sure that he would just look away but he found himself unable to do so. Instead, Tony had tilted his head ever so slightly now and before Gibbs could even form another thought about how wrong this was, the younger man had lifted his head the inch forward that was needed to press his lips to Gibbs'.

Fuck.

Tony's mouth was open to get the necessary air and for some reason so was Gibbs'. The heat was immediate and so overwhelming that for a second Gibbs' mind didn't catch up with its sweetness and wetness until Tony's hands were at the back of his head, drawing him impossibly closer. One thumb was stroking the skin underneath his earlobe and Gibbs involuntarily let out a moan that was drowned out by Tony as his tongue found its way into Gibbs' mouth. He wanted to protest but then he just stopped thinking. All he could do was taste and feel. God, the guy could kiss.

But then, just when Gibbs was about to kiss him back thoroughly, the younger man let go, his hands falling to his sides as he sat back, breathing heavily.

"Sorry," he finally said. "I just… I know you didn't want to."

"It's okay," Gibbs replied and meant it, too.

He, too, was still trying to catch his breath and it wasn't only because of the kiss. Gibbs knew that it had been intense, and hot, and god, it had been so good, but he also realized that it would probably be the only kiss he'd ever get. He felt his heart miss a beat at the thought of it, but deep down, he knew that there was no other way.

He was glad that he'd gotten it.

"I shouldn't have kissed you," Tony whispered now, shaking his head. "But I meant what I said earlier. If you can't do this," once more he gestured between them. "I want to be friends."

"I'd like that," Gibbs replied, while internally, he was still reeling from the kiss. "Don't have many friends these days."

"Neither have I, real ones that is."

Once more, Gibbs nodded before he ran a hand over his face, trying to form a straight thought.

"I should go," he finally said, his voice sounding rough all of sudden.

"Yeah, you should," Tony replied as he got up. "I'll text you later?" he then continued, not sounding too sure about it.

"Yeah," Gibbs nodded and then, despite himself gave the man in front of him a one-armed hug. "I'm sorry," he whispered into Tony's ear before he let go.

The younger man just nodded and then Gibbs turned around, leaving the apartment and Tony behind.

#

Days passed and while Gibbs knew that he had made the right decision, he couldn't help but feel like he was missing something. Even now, as he watched Kate unwrap the gifts for her birthday, he wasn't really paying attention. While work had always managed to keep his head on straight, it didn't seem to do the trick this time. He had found his thoughts straying, had found himself thinking about Tony more than he cared to admit. But it didn't matter. It didn't change anything. Tony had still gone back to Los Angeles and Gibbs was still in DC.

"Wow, thanks Abby," Kate raised him from his thoughts.

"That's not from me," the Goth answered as she walked around Kate's desk to look at the DVD the former Secret Service Agent was holding in her hands.

Gibbs started to thumb through the file in front of him, trying to suppress a grin. He had asked Tony to sign the DVD of his football movie, which wasn't even out yet. Tony had done him the favor, including a 'Happy Birthday Kate'. Apparently, it had the effect that Gibbs had hoped for.

"Who is this from then?" Kate asked now, practically beaming as she looked around the small group of people that were gathered around her.

Everybody just shrugged as Gibbs watched them out of the corner of his eyes. He saw Kate shrug, too, now. She was still staring at the DVD in her hands and Gibbs figured that she would soon be investigating about the present-giver, but he knew that she would never suspect him.

He felt his phone vibrate in the pocket of his slacks and he pulled it out. He knew it was from Tony in an instant. Not that it was hard to do because he still remained the only one who ever texted him.

Did she like the gift?

Gibbs shook his head, wondering how Tony knew that Kate had just opened it, but maybe sometimes there was such a thing as a coincidence after all.

Sure looks like it. Thanks again.

No problem.

Gibbs pocketed his cell again and then loudly cleared his throat.

"Go home," he said. "Before we catch another case before the weekend."

It did the trick and soon, his agents filed out the squad room. He caught Abby give Kate and McGee instructions where to park later and Gibbs realized that they were probably going out that night. He internally shrugged. He was looking forward to a quiet weekend with his boat as it would help him forget the last couple of weeks and he was sure that a couple of glasses of bourbon would make him miss Tony's company less, too.

Sometimes, life could be so easy.