Day by day, Johanna's health made stable progress; she could bathe on her own, she was eating more, and her face grew warmer. Katniss was there by her side everyday, and the two of them started slipping back into the close relationship they had before the incident, but even so you could tell there was some tension lying beneath the smiles and chatting. A lingering lack of trust.

Katniss returned home after one of her countless days spent with Johanna, but there was no warm smell of baking bread, there was no puppy-like greeting at the door. The spent agent removed her shoes and coat and meandered into the kitchen. There was Peeta, his hair was unwashed, his clothing was stained, he was drinking a beer and playing with some cold TV dinner mashed potatoes. When she walked in he looked up unenthusiastically and said coldly, "Oh look who's home, the invisible woman."

"Peeta... What's wrong?" Katniss asked even though she already knew the answer.

"You come home from months away in another country, you spend endless hours at the hospital doing God-knows-what for some... some criminal... I just guess I thought that when you came back things were going to be different. I just thought you would pay a little more attention to me, your fiance, who you claim to love. But I was wrong, I was so wrong about you, Katniss."

"I... I'm sorry. Peeta, I never meant to push you aside, I thought you knew the drawbacks of my job, the long hours, the duties I'm required to make my priority for the sake of this country..."

"But why can't I be your priority? Huh? You're mine, you're what I put first every single time. I love you more than anything, I put you before everything in my life. I treat you well, I give you love, I cook for you, I care for you, I welcome you home and call you because I miss you every second you're away from me. But it's never like that with you is it? You don't miss me when you're at work or wherever you claim to be."

"Wherever I claim to be? What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Tell me something," he began as he took a swig from his beer bottle, "Who is he?"

"Who is who?"

"I'm not an idiot, I know there's got to be another man. You never look at me the same anymore and you're barely ever home."

"There's no other man!" Katniss screamed and then immediately felt guilty in her choice of words. She wasn't lying, there was no man she was cheating on him with. There was a woman. And she thought for a moment about how easy her life with Peeta could be, they would be a nice, normal and socially accepted couple. They both had good jobs, a nice home, they were going to get married and have plenty of children. It would be so easy, it would be the right thing to do. Falling for another girl was scary as hell, she didn't know where things were going to go after she helped set Johanna free. She would probably be considered an accomplice to a Soviet, which would get her clearly fired from her secure job, she would be on the run from police, she would probably never be able to see her family again... She had a choice to make in this moment, she could live a safe and boring life, or one full of passion and fear. Her heart was pounding like a marathon runner's shoes against the track.

"Do you love me at all?" Peeta asked in the most melancholic voice.

"I love you."

"But, are you in love with me?" He asked. She paused.

"No." This was it, there was no going back now, words like these could never be reversed.

"Well," Peeta stammered with tears in his eyes, "Then there's no more need to pretend. I guess the wedding is off?"

"I guess so."

"I never thought I would be standing in our kitchen with you hearing you say you don't love me anymore. I always thought we would be the ones to make it, you know?" he shook his head and downed the rest of the beer.

She handed him the engagement ring and watched him sob when it was placed in his sturdy yet shaking hands. She said she would find a new apartment or move back in with her mother and sister as soon as she could. She apologized repetitively, but no more could be said.

That night Katniss slept on the couch in the living room, the little red lights on the tv danced in her drowsy vision and cars and buses whizzed by outside her window on the streets below. The clock ticked and anxiety settled into her brain, a constant and crushing force that made her hands shake and her eyes unable to close. She stared up at the ceiling wondering why things had to go the way they did, why couldn't she have been better to Peeta, a man who gave her everything? Why couldn't she have just captured Johanna Mason and done her job correctly like she was supposed to? Why did her feelings always have to be so inconvenient, why did they have to hurt everyone in their path? She stirred and became dizzy with these overwhelming thoughts for hours until her mind was so exhausted it had to give in to the sweet release of sleep.

The next morning she awoke, Peeta had already left for the bakery, thank God, it would have been soul-crushingly awkward to run into him this morning. Katniss didn't like feeling like a bad person, she had always tried not to hurt anyone. But sometimes in life good people do bad things, and in the end no one can really apologize for feelings that they can't control. The guilt was enormous, but she tried not to focus on it and instead thought about seeing Johanna's face when she arrived at the hospital.

The subway was late and crowded, but Katniss wasn't surprised considering it was the morning rush hour. The swarms of people were blurred in her vision and she just went through the motions trying to arrive at her destination. Every fuzzy face in the sea of strangers had a place to go, they all had problems and a life and things that made their eyes light up. But in a crowded city, anonymity can be so desensitizing, no one else's goal is more important than yours and Katniss felt her goal was extremely important. Seeing Johanna now that things with Peeta were over was a freeing feeling, but also one of the biggest leaps of faith she'd ever taken. The road with Johanna was uncertain and frightening, but she had a inkling that things would be okay if they were together.

The agent walked into the room of her ex-target, and how strange it still was to her that things would have ended up in this way. There she was as always, laying on the crisp, white hospital bed, her dark hair splayed out on the pillow, a few misplaced strands in her bangs lay messily across her face. She looked so much better, she was slowly coming back to life.

When she saw Katniss, Johanna scowled at first, throughout her healing process Katniss was someone for her to lean on, the only person to help her up. But now that Johanna was close to being released from the hospital, her anger at Katniss was resurfacing. She didn't mean for it to, she almost wished that the anger would go away on its own, she enjoyed all of the time she got to spend with the other girl. But you can only push emotion down so far and deny it for so long.

"Hello, Johanna. How are you feeling today?" asked Katniss.

"Hi, Brainless. I'm well."

"You look a lot better," she said as she sat herself down on a chair next to Johanna's bed.

"I've been in physical therapy. I'm getting to leave soon. Do you know what they're going to do with me when I leave here? Not... not more..." she stopped and looked away.

"No! No, they are just planning on putting you in prison, probably for life," Katniss explained as she looked at the faint scars that still speckled the convict.

"I'm not going," Johanna declared. She had been weakened by the torture, but she was still hard as nails on the inside.

"That's right, you're not," Katniss said smugly and the other girl looked up at her, surprised. "Um, I'm going to get you out of here. Just... tell me when you're feeling up to it."

"But, why?"

"Don't you remember? I made you a promise."

"I thought you were just lying to me again. Maybe you're still lying."

"No, Jo, I swear I'm going to get you the hell away from here. You don't deserve any of this shit."

And for the first time in weeks, Katniss saw those small, white teeth peek under that crooked little smile that she fell in love with the first time she saw it.

"I'm ready," proclaimed the girl. "I'm ready whenever."