Chapter 23:
Clarke and Lexa kept their pace slow as they walked out of Arkadia. They were headed down the path before they veered off it and headed towards the tree line. It was a little cooler in the shade of the trees but Clarke didn't mind it. She felt better the moment she stepped out of the gate at Arkadia, she hadn't realized just how heavy Jasper's words were sitting on her chest.
Physically, her leg hurt a tiny bit with every step but she kept moving accepting the pain as she went. She glanced over at Lexa as they bobbed and weaved through the trees. She caught Lexa's eyes every now and then and watched as the brunette would try to hide a small smile each time, failing miserably. Lexa had no war paint on, but her commander's headpiece was in place on her forehead. Her brown hair was flowing down her shoulders and back. Clarke noticed how it bounced slightly with each step the woman took, she relished in the moments where the patches of light coming through between the trees would illuminate the fine features of Lexa's face.
Lexa remained quiet for a while during their walk into the woods. Clarke wanted to break the silence but she wasn't sure how. Before she could try Lexa spoke, "Indra and the army shouldn't be much farther. We should run into the scouts soon."
Clarke nodded, "Okay."
"They should have news on the Ice Nation by now, they can catch us both up," Lexa continued.
Clarke flashed a look Lexa's way and caught the girl looking at her too. Clarke swallowed, Lexa hadn't even had the information given to her yet by her people and here she was inviting Clarke to take part in the discussion. She was being included in the grounder's affairs without demanding it, without having to fight for it like she did with the Arkadian's and her mother. Lexa was treating Clarke like an equal… Like always, the voice in her head amended. Clarke felt the corner of her lip tug a bit, cracking the tiniest smile.
Clarke swallowed her smile realizing the weight of the situation, if she was being treated like an equal – she better act like it, "So the Ice Queen has sent an army out?"
Lexa had turned her attention back to the direction in front her, "Yes. I knew she had placed the bounty on Wanheda and a few clans had taken up the search in their hopes for riches and power. I heard next of her army marching towards Polis. Since then, I've had no news."
Clarke stopped walking and turned to face Lexa. She felt guilty. "Wait, this is because of me?"
Lexa stopped and turned to Clarke, She bowed her head before looking up again at Clarke, "You didn't cause Nia's decision to march against me."
Clarke shook her head, "No, that's not what I meant. I mean you have no news because of me. You're people are in danger because of me!" She couldn't help but raise her voice in her worry and guilt.
Lexa took a step closer, "My people are safe, Clarke."
"They're not," Clarke tried to cut her off as Lexa took another step closer now close enough that Clarke could feel the heat radiating from her.
"They are. You were not, you needed me-my help." She corrected herself quickly before taking a small step back and looking away, "I knew of Nia's march long before you arrived in Polis Clarke. I chose to leave and bring you home. None of this is your fault." Lexa emphasized the word none when she said this looking at Clarke again.
Clarke took a step closer to Lexa. She reached out her hand before dropping it. Lexa continued speaking before Clarke could say anything. Lexa watched the motion before turning away again and starting to move forward once more, "All that matters is that you're okay." Lexa voice was softer than a whisper, as if she was saying it to herself. Clarke felt uncomfortable like she wasn't supposed to hear it. She felt like she was peeping in on a personal moment. Lexa had already begun to head forward again.
Clarke swallowed her words and followed. She was thinking about the pain and sorrow behind Lexa's eyes, she couldn't shake the feeling that Lexa was replaying the alley incident in her mind, re-watching Clarke fall to the ground. Clarke knew Lexa cared for her, but she was just starting to really believe it. Her mind raced back to the pauna, Clarke remembered how sad and defeated she had felt the moment she thought Lexa's life was over. The thought made a shiver run down her spine as if death was breathing down her neck.
Clarke tried to ignore it and sped up, matching pace with Lexa again.
"Heda!" The warrior scouts greeted Lexa as they realized who was coming through the trees. Lexa bowed her head slightly to each one. Clarke noticed the care the girl took to acknowledge each warrior "we must look into the eyes of our warriors and say 'go die for me'"Lexa's words rang in the back of Clarke's head. Lexa was incredible. She felt each loss, she lived by her words, she was kind, wise and courageous. Clarke continued to watch in admiration before she realized the shouts had now become whispers in Trigadesleng.
She heard whispers of her new grounder title Wanheda. She heard rumblings like 'mountain slayer' and 'the legend reutrns'. Clarke tried to ignore them but the warriors were staring, some bowed their head, others actually dropped to a knee as the two girls passed. Lexa slowed her pace allowing Clarke to match her stride again. Clarke hadn't even noticed she had fallen behind a few paces in her shock of the warrior's admiration. She was grateful Lexa was now beside her again because the knowing look the girl was giving her was helping Clarke move forward and block out the reminders of the mountain.
They rounded into the camp to the sound of cheers and hollering. Lexa led Clarke to a tent and stepped aside to let her enter before her. Clarke nodded politely as she passed into the tent. Inside she found Indra along with a few other warriors Clarke did not know. LExa followed her in and made her way over to greet her people. "What news?" she asked.
"Ice Nation have halted their march. Their army has split into two, one headed East, one headed this way," Indra began.
Another man stepped forward, "Why would they split their forces?"
"They have the largest army of the 12 clans, they can afford to." Lexa said knowingly. "The East means they are going to Polis."
"And the other army?" Clarke piped up. "The one headed here, what do they want with Arkadia?"
Lexa looked at her, no commander's mask was on her face, Clarke could see the fear in her eyes before the commander mask was again replaced before to looked back to her people.
"It could be a number of reasons. They could see you as a threat due to your weapons, they could be coming to make an alliance, they could be coming for war prisoners…" Lexa paused as she explained.
Indra spoke up, "We must call a meeting with the clan embassadors."
Lexa nodded in agreement before turning to one of the warriors by the tents entrance. "Go send riders to the clans, I call upon the representatives to honour the coalition and present themselves before me."
With that the man left the tent in a hurry.
"Commander, there's more," Indra then said.
Clarke heard the sigh come from Lexa almost as though she expected there to more bad news. "What is it?" she asked her voice calm.
"Our scouts have also reported troops to the South…they wear the mark of Ice Nation." Indra continued.
Lexa turned to face her, "Nia." She said menacingly. Indra nodded.
"They could be marching to Polis, they could be coming here or they could be marching to meet up with the other army. A third attack from a different direction: Ice Nation is surrounding us."
Lexa took a deep breath, "Send word to Titus, we head to Polis tomorrow. Tell your attendants. We leave the three hundred warriors behind as a peacekeeping force."
With that the warriors left the tent leaving only Clarke and Lexa.
Clarke cleared her throat unsure of what to do. The weight of everything was landing on her at once. Here they were again on the brink of another battle. Her people were once again in danger. Enemies encircled her once again. She felt her head begin to swim in the panic. She feared for their lives, the ice nation would wipe them out. Everything Clarke had done up to this point would be for nothing, the deaths she caused hadn't stopped anything they hadn't afforded Clarke and her people victory or peace. All she did was buy them time. Clarke felt weak, her knees had begun to shake slightly and she felt herself begin to stumble slightly as she tried to regain her composure. She had had a day of peace…it didn't even last the day. Clarke felt her eyes flutter close as the feeling of faint began to take her. Before she lost concisouness however she snapped out of it at Lexa's soft voice.
"War is brewing Clarke, I need you." It was little more than a whisper but Clarke heard it. She crossed the tent and stood in front of Lexa. She saw tear bubbling up into her eyes. In this moment Clarke knew it wasn't Clarke's people she was talking about, it wasn't the need for another strong leader and force this was about Clarke. Lexa was openly admitting her need for Clarke in her life, her desire for Clarke to be at her side. Clarke blinked realizing the magnitude of the moment. It was then that Clarke caught her breath in her throat, her heart beating faster she reach down to grab Lexa's hands. She squeezed as she lifted them slightly looking deep into Lexa's green eyes.
"I need you too." The words fell off her lips easily. When she heard them for herself she knew them to be true. Before Clarke realized what she was doing she was leaning in and planting the softest most sincere kiss on Lexa's lips. It was slow, delicate and full of sadness. It was incredibly reminiscent of their last kiss, the last time they were on the brink of war. The difference this time was that Clarke had initiated it, letting Lexa know that she too cared deeply.
She gently brought a hand to Lexa's soft cheek and as her fingers grazed against her Clarke's skin burned at the touch. She could feel the passion begin to stir deep in her belly begging to spread itself out into the rest of her body. She pulled back slightly to break the kiss, she didn't want to push Lexa or herself. She could already feel the need to replace her lips on the girls before she felt Lexa's hand reach to her hip keep her where she was. Lexa leaned back in and caught Clarke's lips in her own. It was just as soft as the first one, just as subtle but just as deep and meaningful as well. They stayed like this, exchanging small sweet kisses before finally resting their foreheads against together.
When Clarke came back to her senses a bit she opened her eyes to find Lexa staring back at her. The two of them smiled and pulled their heads apart, their hands falling off the other's body. Clarke felt the blood rush to her cheeks, she saw Lexa try to hide her small shy smile and colour flush to her own cheeks. Lexa cleared her throat before turning to face Clarke, "we will figure this out Clarke. I promise," she said quietly.