Dan is kissing her over and over, his tongue tangling with hers, sucking on her bottom lip, and Blair is kissing him back, and there is nothing slow or sweet about this. It's rough and desperate and Blair has been waiting for this moment for months. She's been wanting him since they shared that dance at Serena and Nate's wedding, since his arms went around her and his fingers ran across the bare skin of her back and she realized that almost everything can change over fifteen years but some things stay the same.
Almost the same.
She has always felt intensely about Dan, always liked the way he sends electric shocks through her body that make her feel like jelly, and while she may have been confused about whether or not she loved him, Blair has never been confused about whether or not she wanted him.
She's still not.
She wants him. Right now.
They haven't left the kitchen and Dan is still kissing her and he slowly walks her backwards until she feels the counter pushing into her back, and his hands are sliding under her t-shirt, pushing it up, finding her breasts and her nipples are hard under his fingertips and Blair gasps his name against his lips.
dan
How can he do this to her. How can she completely unravel around him until there is no coherent thought left in her head.
She slips her hands under his shirt, and when her fingers find his skin she feels that electric shock again and Dan moans against her mouth, a deep, rumbly sound, and she aches so badly that she wants to beg for relief, beg for it to stop, at the same time she never wants to stop feeling like this.
never stop
His mouth grows more urgent, threatening to consume her, and Blair deepens the kiss, opening her mouth wider, taking in more of him, and there is nothing sweet about this anymore. It's just stripped down lust.
Dan's hand slides out from under Blair's shirt and she's about to protest when she feels his fingers hook around her panties and start to tug them down, and she hisses the word, 'yes' against his mouth.
yesyesyesyesyes
Her panties drop to the floor and Blair kicks them away and Dan breaks the kiss and Blair whimpers in protest, but then realizes that he's only struggling to get off his pants and boxers, and then his lips are back on hers and he's hoisting her up. Blair wraps herself around him, legs around his waist, arms around his neck, and his hand are on her ass, and then he's inside her and Blair gasps, no longer feeling the edge of the counter pushing into her backside.
She is undone.
This feels familiar, like a certain elevator on a certain night long ago, and Dan starts to move and before long they're both coming, gripping each other, struggling to hold onto each other, a sheen of sweat slicking their bodies and Dan is still inside her, his arms wrapped around her and he's kissing her, this time slowly and sweetly and Blair realizes that her cheeks are wet with tears.
She likes this date. She likes staying in.
Dan keeps her in his arms and he carries her back to his bedroom and they climb into bed, Blair nestling as close to Dan as she possibly can, wanting to melt into him, and her eyelids feeling heavy so she closes them, and finally finds the will to speak.
"Thank you." she whispers, still feeling shockwaves coursing through her body. She knows Dan is smiling his casual, happy, lopsided smile, but she still can't open her eyes.
"That was pretty damn good," he says, a hand idly rubbing her arm.
"Mmmmmm." Blair moans, feeling even more languid, letting her body sink into the comfortable bed. She would agree with him, tell him that he had managed to blow her mind, but coherent thought was proving difficult.
"Maybe the best I've ever had."
Blair opens her eyes and looks up at him. She sees the smile she'd imagined plastered on Dan's face and he looks as happy as she feels.
"Better than elevator sex?"
"Oh god, yes."
Blair swats at him in mock irritation, telling him that elevator sex wasn't that bad. They were just both better now than they had been back then. Dan answers that clearly some things improved with time, like wine and stinky cheese, and clearly, morning sex against the kitchen counter. Blair can't disagree with him.
They are quiet for a long time, just lying there, tangled up in each other, legs intertwined, Blair tracing random patterns across Dan's stomach. She can hear the sound of the ocean, the roar of the waves breaking onto the sand, and in the distance gulls squawk, and a little breeze blows through the open window of Dna's bedroom. Blair clears her throat a little then speaks again.
"What are you thinking about," she asks.
Dan teases her about being such a girl, wanting to know what he's thinking and Blair threatens to clock him with a pillow.
"No really, I want to know."
"Whether or not I have the energy to fuck you again right now or if I need five more minutes."
"Boys and sex," Blair signs, "is that all you think about?"
"Actually, no. I can go a whole five minutes without thinking about it now, although being around you the last few days has decreased my success rate."
Blair smiles.
"You're so grown up."
Blair likes that she this this effect on Dan.
"So, what are you thinking about?" Dan asks her back, his hand going down to her thigh and Blair is suddenly finding it difficult to think at all.
"I'm thinking that this is all really nice."
An unreadable look passes over Dan's face then he rolls on top of her and pins her under his weight, and now he's grinning wolfishly.
"Really, really nice." Blair whispers. "Super awesome. But maybe we could improve..."
Dan gets her hint. He's kissing her again, but this time it's slow and sweet, almost lazy, and Blair takes the time to really savor how his mouth moves on hers. He breaks the kiss and starts kissing his way down, trailing butterfly kisses down the side of her neck, nips at her collarbone, lingers at her breasts, taking her nipple into his mouth and sucking on it and Blair utters a curse word followed by his name and tries not to beg. Then his mouth is making its way across her abdomen and his hands are pushing her thighs apart, and Blair throws her head back and bites her lips because, because...
Dan stops moving and they are still.
"Seriously?" Blair gasps, almost quivering with anticipation, annoyed that he has decided to pause at that very moment. Then she decides that she's not below begging. "Please."
pleasepleasepleaseplease
What kind of amazing places can this man take her to? Blair manages to think that she's about to find out when Dan goes down on her and Blair calls out his name.
They stay in the rest of the day, having sex, eating, having more sex, making up for lost time. Dinner time arrives and they manage to throw on some clothes and Dan makes them pasta with spring peas and prosciutto and shaved parmesan and pours two glasses of deep red wine, and they sit on his deck with plates balanced on their laps, watching the sunset.
"I think you were on to something," Blair says, glancing over at Dan, then taking another bite of her pasta.
"What do you mean," Dan asks, taking a sip from the glass of wine that is sitting on the side table next to his chair.
"This whole waiting thing." Blair answers, "I thought you were crazy. I wanted this the moment I saw you in New York."
"I know." Dan smiles. "You've made that very clear."
Blair wasn't 21 anymore, and it's actually not like she's ever been afraid to ask for sex, but she's grown comfortable with making her needs known. Still, she blushes with Dan's words.
"But this, well, the sex, but all of this," Blair continues, gesturing around her, "it's, well, it's really nice."
"So, you're telling me you're glad we did this right."
Blair nods. Yes, that's exactly what she's telling him. She's deeply grateful that he decided to do it right, even if it drove her crazy at times.
"Thank you, Humphrey," Blair says, stabbing her fork at her plate.
"No problem, Waldorf. And I'm glad you came here to finish up our dates," Dan grins. "Otherwise it could have been many more months. I don't know if I would have survived."
She doesn't know if she would have survived either, but now they don't have to find out.
Blair puts down her plate and stands up, then she walks over to stand in front of Dan and takes his plate out of his hands, setting it down next to his wine glass. Then she folds herself into his lap and feels his arms come around her and nestles her head into the crook of his neck.
"This is better." Blair signs. "So much better."
She likes the here and now.
Dan smiles up at her and searches her eyes, then he tells her that he loves her, and Blair answers back that she loves him too, like it's the most natural thing in the world, then Dan is kissing her again and she wants to joke with him about how much stamina he thinks she has, but instead she kisses him back and thinks she has just enough energy for one more round.
This time they make love, Dan whispering line after line of prose between the kisses he drops on her skin and Blair thinks of the story he delivered to her in Paris, at least a lifetime ago, and how he had put his heart onto paper.
Blair grips Dan's hair and wishes she had Dan's gift for words, because all she can do it tell him that she loves him between kisses, but she wants to tell him to much more. She wants to tell him that she has her heart and that he always has, and she wants to tell him she's sorry that she wasted so much time, although she knows Dan would tell her that their past means nothing because they're here, right now.
Here and now.
Instead she straddles him and looks down at him, placing her hands on either side of his face a and lets her eyes tell him everything she can't say with words.
She is overcome. Overcome with everything that has come to pass, and she lowers herself onto him and watches as his eyes grow wide and his mouth falls open, and all she wants is to make him feel as good as he's made her feel. They move in time, bodies slick, Blair's hair hanging down around her face, his hands on her hips, and she watches as he lets go, slack jawed, gasping her name, then she feels the melting spread and Blair lets go as well.
It's been an amazing day.
They collapse against each other and Dan is looking up at her, his hand sliding along the skin of her back and he smiles and then the does something that changes everything in a split second. As he looks at her Blair can see the love in his eyes, radiating into her, and she feels warm and happy and she wants nothing more than this, and nothing less, and then it all shatters when Dan reaches up and strokes her face with his fingertips and his mouth opens and in a single moment he violates everything that he's told her they're about. No more here and now. No more just today.
"Marry me." he whispers.
Blair falls apart with his words, and not in a good way.
TBC