chapter title: azul
summary: —don't cry, everything will be okay. let kindness dry those tears.
word count: 2980
a/n: i'm so ashamed that finishing this story is taking so long. i mean, i'd rather take it slow so i can do it right, than rush and do a bad job. i just wish my updates weren't so inconsistent:-( I WILL GET THIS DONE THO!
Orihime steps out of the shower.
Ishida had told her that she could, if she wanted, take one in the female staff's locker room before she left. She is grateful for that. She hadn't taken a shower with warm water in a long time.
She wraps a towel around herself and looks at the bundle of clothing on the bench waiting for her.
The sweater is a beige color, it looks warm and thick. The t-shirt lying on top of the sweater is cotton and white. The jeans are what people used to consider a good brand before and she can see why; they look really durable. The underclothing is simple and practical. It's more than she could ever ask for.
She dries herself with the towel before hurrying to put on the clothes. The clothes are as comfortable as they look. She hasn't worn comfortable clothes in so long. Her hair is still wet. She looks down at her feet and wriggles her toes—she needs socks and shoes. She wonders what happened to her old clothing and shoes. She should ask Kurosaki. She puts the towel around her shoulders and heads for the door.
She pushes it open hesitantly. Kurosaki said he'd be waiting just outside but what if he's gone? Should she go looking for him? Or should she wait for him? Then she sees orange and sighs in relief. She opens the door the rest of the way.
Kurosaki is sitting down, leaning against the wall. He turns when she opens the door and stands when she exits the room.
"You done?"
She nods.
"Alright, you hungry? We can go to the cafeteria if you are. Ishida gave me some food coupons for you."
Orihime begins to shake her head when her stomach betrays her by growling loudly. She flushes in embarrassment. She can feel her cheeks getting warmer when a corner of his mouth tugs up in amusement.
"I-it's not funny!" she huffs, stalking past him to the elevator.
He follows after her. She presses the button. She looks down to avoid his gaze while they wait for the elevator to arrive. She wriggles her toes again. The floor is cold.
"What happened to my things?" she looks up at him and frowns when he looks away from her quickly.
"Uh...well, they...we burned them."
"Why?! They were still usable!"
He holds his hands up in defense, "They could've been carrying diseases! Ryūken didn't want to take the risk."
Orihime takes a breath to calm herself. Okay. She can understand that. She's almost scared to ask her next question "...and my shoes?"
"Also burned but don't worry, I'll get you some soon. For now you can wear these slippers."
"Thanks," she sighs tiredly, taking the slippers from him and putting them on.
The elevator bell dings, announcing that the elevator is here. The doors open and they both step inside quickly.
The silence is awkward and stifling in the elevator.
Orihime opens her mouth to say something but then the elevator shakes and the lights flicker at the same moment and she stumbles. Kurosaki catches her in his arms before she falls over.
"Careful," he breathes, holding her to him.
The elevator bell dings again to announce that they've arrived on their floor and she pushes away from him. She's thankful for that little bell because now, she doesn't have to think about how nice his arms felt or how his voice sent shivers down her spine or how hot her cheeks felt. She especially doesn't have to think about how such a simple and mundane thing had made her heart flutter rapidly.
"This way," he says, taking her elbow in his hand gently and leading her in the direction of the cafeteria. She can't help but notice the gentleness in which he treats her. It puzzles her. She just can't understand it.
This world they live in is cruel, ruthless, and ugly. It breeds suspicion not trust. It makes people cold and callous and untrusting. It doesn't make them gentle, doesn't make them kind—doesn't make them the way Kurosaki Ichigo is. His eyes aren't calculating like so many people's are. His eyes are warm—they make her feel warm all over and she doesn't know why. She feels safe and protected with him, like in the elevator when she'd stumbled and he'd caught her—he'd put his arm around her so gently as if she'd break with too harsh of a touch—no one had ever held her like that except for her older brother and he's dead.
She doesn't like it.
She doesn't like the fact that she feels safe and protected around him because it's an illusion. This world isn't safe for anyone. One person shouldn't be enough to make her feel otherwise. It doesn't make any kind of sense. That is why it must be a trick. He must be a good liar to make her believe and make her feel things she hasn't felt before. He must want something because everyone wants something. Nothing is ever free.
So what does he want? Why is he so kind, so gentle, so warm, towards her? Why?
She certainly hasn't done anything to deserve his kindness.
He saved her when he didn't need to save her. He could have left her to be torn apart. He could have ignored her cries of help and avoided the risk of death, of infection, but he didn't. He saved her without even knowing her.
It doesn't make sense. She put his life at risk and yet he's kind. It doesn't make any sense. What does he want from her?
She grimaces, clutching the short locks of hair at her temple (had they really needed to cut so much?). Ah, it hurts to think. She makes a noise of discomfort. She forces a smile when Kurosaki looks at her worriedly. There's no need to have him hovering over her even more.
Well, for now, his motives aren't that important. She has other things to worry about. Like, what kind of food do they serve in the cafeteria?
"Hm, I think today is grilled cheese. You can also have fruit and salad. It's simple, plain really, but it's a lot more than what you can find outside."
Oops. She hadn't realized she'd spoken out loud.
"Anyway, sit down while I go get our food."
"Oh, you don't have to! I can—"
"Ishida said not to put too much strain on your leg. If your leg gets worse, the one he'll be angry at is me. So sit down and wait."
She is hesitant to accept. He's already done more than enough and she hadn't even walked on her leg all that much either! She opens her mouth to protest but bites her lip when she notices the look he has on. He is scowling adamantly, arms crossed. He looks determined. He won't let her do what she pleases. She already knows how stubborn he can be and he doesn't seem like he's going to budge on this matter.
"Okay," she sighs, and nods, "Thank you, Kurosaki-san."
She can't help but smile slightly when he smirks approvingly.
"It's no problem, Inoue. And it's fine to just call me Ichigo."
"Oh, that wouldn't be proper!"
She fidgets under his deadpan gaze.
"You're kidding, right?" he drawls, "I saved your life, carried you over rooftops to this hospital (which isn't easy by the way), let you bite me, and it isn't...proper for you to call me Ichigo?"
She feels heat rise to her cheeks in embarrassment. That's uncalled for, she thinks. Besides, his first name is special, it should only be spoken by people he's close to, people he knows—people he cares about. She just met him so it wouldn't be right to call him so familiarly. And, besides that, he's a hypocrite! He still calls her Inoue! Although, she hadn't told him to call her anything else. Still she doesn't really feel like arguing with him over something like this. She'll concede...kind of.
"Alright then. Thank you, Kurosaki-kun."
She walks away from him to find a table to sit at, smiling secretly at his sigh of defeat. A table in a corner, near a window, catches her attention. She sighs as she sits down. Her hand unconsciously goes to brush her hair, to twist a lock of it in her fingers, when she remembers they cut it. Her brother had always liked her hair long which is the main reason she had kept it to waist-length. It saddens her a little that it now goes up to her shoulders. It's logical though, to have it cut. She should have cut it a long time ago. Her hand brushes through her hair. It's strange. She feels like she's missing something...
She gasps. Her hairpins! They hadn't fallen when she'd gotten attacked had they? Oh no those were the last thing her brother had given her before dying. They were practically a part of her. If she'd lost them, it would be like losing a limb. She holds back her tears, trying to remember if they had fallen or not. Maybe Ichigo will know?
A tray of food is placed in front of her. She looks up. Ichigo's brow is knitted in concern. She looks down at her food, wiping her eyes discreetly. She feels a hand on her head.
"You okay?" he says softly.
He shouldn't be so kind, she thinks. She wipes at her eyes again, sniffling. She can't believe she's about to cry in front of him (because of him) again.
"Um, I don't know. I...when you saved me was I wearing hairpins? They were—"
His hand retracts, "Oh! Yeah, I got them before Ryūken could destroy them. They looked pretty important."
She lets the tears fall then.
He really shouldn't be so kind to her.
Ichigo doesn't know what to expect when he tells her that she is remanded into his custody. A little gratitude seems okay to him, he'd also understand annoyance. He is a little insulted that what he gets is despair. He isn't that bad is he?
Whatever. There's nothing else to be done. She'd just have to deal with it.
And she does.
After the initial reaction, she does not put up any sort of complaint. He'd be glad about it— since the majority of the people he knows would have thrown a fit and fought him all the way—except she gets quiet and looks a little sad. He doesn't like that for some reason. He should care less about this girl's emotional state but he just can't. He's stupid like that, everyone says. Stupidly kind. It annoys Ichigo a lot. Everything he does seems pretty normal to him. Anyone would do what he does, is what he thinks.
It doesn't matter though. He has other things to do besides worry about what people think of him. Like, what does Inoue want to eat once she's done showering? She deserves a good meal.
The hospital cafeteria isn't known for its' variety of foods. When you've been out in the mess Inoue had been out in though, everything tastes like something a king would eat.
He hears the door to the women locker room open. Inoue steps out, drying her once long and now short hair. Ichigo feels guilty that they had to cut so much but Ryūken told him it'd be easier than trying to untangle the mess it had become. He also feels guilty because they had to put all her belongings in the incinerator, he hopes she doesn't ask about it. The only thing he'd managed to sneak away from Ryūken's wrathful gaze had been a pair of turquoise hair pins, shaped like hibiscus flowers. They had looked important, too important to let burn. He could feel them in his pocket now.
Anyway, he should ask Inoue if she's hungry.
She says no, but then her stomach growls and Ichigo has to hold back a laugh.
They head to the elevators. He watches her look down at the floor and wriggles her toes before curling them. Her feet are small, he notes. He doesn't know why the thought of how small her feet are (and how small she is) makes him flush.
Ichigo has to look away quickly when she looks up.
"Where are my things?"
He tells her.
Her reaction is exactly what he thought it would be. He hands her a pair of slippers when she asks about her shoes. For now they are better than nothing. It gets quiet after that.
The elevator is worse. The silence is stifling. Then the elevator lights flicker and the elevator shakes. Great. Someone really needed to fix these things. Although, ever since the world went to the dumps, they'd been short of elevator maintenance people.
Out of the corner of his eye he sees Inoue lurch forward with the elevator. He reacts on instinct. He catches her before she can fall.
"Careful," he says.
The elevator bell dings and the doors open. Inoue practically runs out, trying to get away from him.
She is looking around, when Ichigo takes her by the elbow and leads her to the cafeteria. He sense how uncomfortable she is at his touch though and lets her go. He doesn't want to scare her off. She's in a strange place surrounded by strange people. She doesn't know who to trust. Even more likely, she doesn't know how to trust, not anymore. This world makes people frightened, cautious of every move, and extremely distrustful of everything. Ichigo doesn't want to ruin his chances of getting her to trust him and open up on her own terms.
He doesn't think too much on it though, because Inoue asks him what kind of food they have in the cafeteria.
"Hm, I think today is grilled cheese. You can also have fruit and salad. It's simple, plain really, but it's a lot more than what you can find outside."
She stands there, silently.
"Anyway, sit down while I go get our food."
Inoue begins to protest. Ichigo shuts that down immediately. Both Ryūken and Uryū will throttle him if he lets Inoue's injury get any worse. He can already hear them yelling at him. He does not want to think about the pain they will put him through for not taking care of his ward.
It doesn't look like she's going to give in but she does. "Okay. Thank you, Kurosaki-san."
She smiles and Ichigo thinks that he'd like to see her smile more. As long as she doesn't call him Kurosaki-san. That just reminds him of his father. He almost shudders at the though of being like him. He tells her it's fine to just call him Ichigo.
"Oh, that wouldn't be proper!" She says, fidgeting.
Why. Ichigo almost asks. He can't believe this girl.
"You're kidding, right?" he drawls, "I saved your life, carried you over rooftops to this hospital (which isn't easy by the way), let you bite me, and it isn't...proper for you to call me Ichigo?"
"Alright, Kurosaki-kun."
Ichigo almost says something about that too but he catches sight of her smile as she walks away to sit down, and decides to just leave it be. Being called Kurosaki-kun isn't so bad. Also, he calls her Inoue and not Orihime so he can't really complain about it.
He heads off in the opposite direction to get their food.
When he walks he feels something poking him in his pant's pocket. He remembers the hairpins. He'll give them to her once he gets their food.
The line for the food isn't big. The cafeteria is pretty empty too. Which is surprising for lunch time. It's is likely that they got their early though. Ichigo counts himself lucky. Now, they could eat without being disturbed by nosy people. He doubts that Inoue would have felt comfortable being overwhelmed by questions from strangers.
As Ichigo makes his way to where Inoue is seated, two trays full of food in his hands, he sees her looking at the table. As he gets closer, he sees tears glistening in her eyes.
He places her food in front of her, hoping to distract her so she won't cry. Ichigo does not handle crying girls well. Once had been a fluke of some sort.
She looks up and then down at the food again.
"Are you okay?" he asks, careful to keep his voice low. He has his hand on her head. He hadn't realized he'd done that.
She sniffles and wipes at her eyes, "Um, I don't know. I...when you saved me was I wearing hairpins? They were—"
It feels like a light goes off in his brain, He takes back his hand from her head, "Oh! Yeah, I got them before Ryūken could destroy them. They looked pretty important."
And then, Inoue starts to cry, and Ichigo doesn't know what to do or what he did to cause this. All he knows is that he can hear people coming in and he doesn't want them to see her cry. He pulls her out of the chair and hugs her. Not once does he think about his actions or the consequences. Somehow, she made him forget. He just wants her to not be sad and this is the only thing he can think of to stop her crying.
Inoue tense up in his arms before she sobs and clings on to him.
Ichigo feels his heart break a little.
"Don't cry," he says.
The cafeteria is full now and he can hear people whispering. He doesn't care.
"Everything is gonna be okay now so don't cry, Inoue."
Her hairpins glitter on the table. They remind him of her tears and he hugs her tighter.
Everything will be okay.
note: will proofread and fix mistakes later, i'm so tried right now.